HUNGER

❝    don’t  think  for  a  second  that  i  didn’t  catch  you  staring.    ❞

His eyes were the color of the kelp on the shore, flecked with splinters of driftwood— which had analyzed the individual. The jackal wore such fur that seemed like the hue of an English oak in spring rains, beautiful from the first rays of dawn to the serenade of every starlit night. In your eyes is your humanity, the person you really are. There are times it gets lost when you wear that suit… when you become the man the world demands of you. But he saw it in his eyes that day in the sunshine, waiting for the crossing to turn green. He saw the love that burns there too, the sort that goes for eternity. There is something in your spirit that dances when you play, like a fire giving just the right amount of warmth. The flames almost extinguished, when you are under the gun of guilt, shame, and fear. I know that isn’t you, not the real version. He had begged to differ from the jackal’s statement— such a gentle soul hiding in isolation, waiting for the right time to bloom.

❝ You claim that you’re a beast— broken, harsh, hurt. I’m aware of those feelings, I struggle myself. But you do not need to isolate yourself from comfort. ❞

you  keep  a  hand  on  the  handle  of  your  blade   /   clenching  it   (   you  hate  this   /   you  hated  how  your  hands  only  feel  comfort  when  it’s  holding  onto  a  weapon   ).   you’d  rather  choke  on  your  own  blood   &   die  here   /   if  it  meant  that  no  one  else  could  carve  open  the  rest  of  your  body.   you’re  already  cut  into  pieces   /   fragments  of  who  you  use  to  be   &   molded  into  parts  of  you  that  you  never  asked   (   &   you  burned  the  pieces  that  didn’t  fit   ).   your  eyes  of  fire   &   ice   /   glare  at  the  other.   what  was  there  to  gain   /   in  trying  to  reach  for  a  piece  of  you  buried  underneath  the  ashes  of  the  lives  you  killed   ?

you  no  longer  have  the  ruby   /   that  part  of  you  was  carved  away  from  you  as  well.   leaving  you  wounded   /   leaving  you  empty   &   powerless   (   your  life  no  longer  held  any  value  anymore   /   it  never  did   ).   you  paid  the  price  for  infinite  power   /   it  costed  your  life.   for  this  wasn’t  living   /   you   were  not  alive   (   you  are  standing  at  the  edges  of  life   &   death   /   you  are  waiting  for  the  moment  the  weight  of  your  body  collapses  over   ).

&   watch   /   at  how  far  you  will  fall  into  the  depths  of  hell.

@zonepolice​   :    You are made of comets and stars. Do not let anyone treat you as if you are dirt and dust.

I’M  UGLY  INSIDE   &   OUT.

you  are   /   aching   &   starved   (   a  wounded   &   hungry  beast   ).   you  are   /   incarnate  of  regret   &   doubt.   they  say   /   time  heals  all  wounds.   you  are  the  exception   /   you  are  nothing  but  scars   &   cracks   &   broken  parts   (   bleeding   /   until  you  are  left  with  nothing  left   ).   this  body  was  never  your  own   /   used   (   battered   &   bruised   /   you  were  born  nothing   /   until  he  came  along   ).

he  made  you  into  something   /   he  made  you  into  a  monster.

a  child  born  to  be  the  perfect  mercenary   /   that  is  who  you  are.   that  is  your  identity   /   but  it  is  not  the  identity  you  wanted  for  yourself.   he  took  you  under  his  wing   /   he  saw  the  perfect  little  monster  in  you.   your  childhood  was  nothing  but  brutality   /   sculpting  you  to  be  a  weapon.   your  heart   /   ached   &   it  aches  now   &  it  will  continue  to  ache   (   for  it’s  been  beaten  black   /   til  there  was  no  color  to  it  anymore   ).

&   after  all  this  time   /   you’re  still  nothing  but  dirt.

❝    there’s  nothing  here  to  salvage.   don’t  waste  your  breathe  on  someone  like  me.    ❞

╸༺ ⦃ She kept herself at a manageable pace- knowing that non-natives had a harder time traversing the sandy winds of the Shaquaal desert; but not quite understanding the more specific difficulties that a sandstorm may have on someone. Roah herself had been living in this desert for all her life- sometimes she would totally miss that a storm had even happened.

▬-▬-𒆨⦅ “ Hm, really ? Sounds kinda tiring … “

            Ichor was very fortunate to make it through, because he could’ve very well been left behind for some time- Roah may be smart, but she can be a little air-headed at times. As soon as they arrive at the ruins, she stops and turns to face him again.

▬-▬-𒆨⦅ “ The others tend to get a little excited when a                   new face shows up - don’t be afraid to let                   them know you want space, okay ? “ she chuckles.

╸༺ ⦃ Then she began digging at the ground- crouching and scooping large handfuls of sand out of the ground; not unlike a dog would. In a matter of seconds, a trapdoor is revealed, and she pulls it open. There’s a ladder leading down into a rather well-lit cave system; and the smell of an oasis… 

❝    right    ❞   a  dry  response   /    yet   ,   very  characteristic  of  you.   curiously   /   you  watch  her  dig  through  the  piles  of  endless  sands  to  reveal  a  hidden  passageway.   you  peek  a  little  bit  down  there   /   while  a  different  part  of  you  that  you’ve  been  trying  to  hide  peeks  its  ugly  head  in  your  mind   (   barking   &   gnawing  at  any  rational  thought   /   screaming  for  you  to  not  trust  the  stranger   ).   you  steady  your  hands   /   as  you  watch  roah  head  straight  down.

contemplating  for  a  second  or  two   /   before  following  after   (   you  would  die  on  your  own  out  here   ).

honestly   /   you  don’t  remember  how  long  it’s  been  since  you’ve  been  wandering  through  the  desert  before  you  met  roah.   you  were  running  low  on  waters   /   you  wondered  if  you  would  have  simply  died  there.   you  suppose  it  would  certainly  be  a  bland  end   /   for  a  criminal  like  you.   perhaps  your  worries  of  this  stranger  backstabbing  you   /   will  come  into  fruition   (   &   yet   /   in  your  experience   /   you’ve  come  to  learn  when  someone  tells  a  lie   /   it’s  unlikely  she  would  be  lying   /   unless  she’s  just  a  damn  good  liar   ).   

if  her  heart  is  truly  good   /   you  worry  what  a  future  like  her’s  awaits.   you  can’t  imagine  it  ending  well   /   it  never  does.   not  like  you’re  one  to  talk   /   the  life  you  lead  didn’t  end  well  either   (   perhaps  both  sides  of  the  coins  were  both  awful  odds   ).

while  lost  in  your  thoughts   /   you  notice  something  different  from  the  walls  of  this  cave.

@zonepolicing​   :    Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you.

THANK  YOU  ZONIC.   VERY  COOL

@twotiminx​   :   “ the worst feeling is not knowing what you’re feeling ”

SCRIPTURES  ON  THE  TOMES

not  like  that  mattered  to  you   /   you’re  just  the  hollow  husk  that  infinite  left  behind   (   a  man  no  more   ).   you  carved  out  your  heart   /   yet  something  weighs  inside  your  chest   &   you  don’t  know  what  it  is.   it’s  there   /   you  know  it  is   ,   but  you  can’t  put  a  name  to  it.   not  like  you  care  to   /   you’ve  long  since  given  up  on  things  like  feelings   (   you’re  too  far  gone   /   you’re  limping  through  a  dark  hallway   /   just  to  finally  collapse  somewhere  before  reaching  the  light   ).

evidently , rouge was trying to get caught , or at least she wasn’t too bothered about that being the outcome . after all , she’s too good at what she does to allow herself to be sniffed out so easily   .   .   .   then again , maybe he’s that good too .

“ oopsie ! looks like ya’ caught me . nothin’ gets passed you , does it hot - shot ? ”

you  promptly  turn  away  from  the  bat   /   you  keep  going  the  way  you  forged  for  yourself.   always  moving   /   rarely  stopping   (   that’s  how  you  had  to  live   ).  giving  a  dismissive  wave  to  rogue   /   as  you  proceed  to  walk  away from  any  conversation  or  business  she  may  have  with  you.

@team-phantom​   :    “ my tolerance for bullshit seems to diminish with age ”

AGE