Jon Snow is a mad man, it is said.
From mouth to mouth, they say he lives in silence a top of the Night’s Watch, walks along others wearing black that call him Lord Commander and watch him walk alone in the night when the cold is more cruel until morrow comes and he is back in his chambers, alone and ever silent.
He never leaves the castle, barely leaves his chambers. He only resurges at night to meet the White Lady that haunts the place, the men say when they go down to town.
That they hear the chain he wears on his wrist and around his hand, when he walks alone, murmuring back to the White Lady at his side.
She whispers for him to come to her when he has paid for what he has done, she awaits with child. They await his homecoming.Â
The mad man refuses her sight, her voice, her touch, yet always follows her direction with his eyes to the ground. And he speaks of her and sometimes even dares talk to her, like only a mad man can believe its ghosts are real.Â
He sees her at down, too. In the snow and beyond the wall. She’s always there, the men say to have seen her too. The White Lady with her almost full belly, her red cheeks, pink lips, white hair.
“I killed the woman I love”, he answers when Lords come and ask why he has exiled himself to the North, smelling of smoke and holding himself miserable, all in black, chain in his hand.
“I killed the woman I love,” he talks of her like if she was still breathing, his White Lady that never leaves, that mourns at night his lost mind.
He is a mad man now, starving himself from the rest of the world, refusing to see the King and the Lady in the North that call him a brother, even if people believes him the last true Stark standing, the hero of Westeros.
Sometimes, there’s a gilmmer of purple in his eyes when he looks at those who call him that. He refuses the name, the people, the story. Refuses the fire in the coldest nights as he refuses guards and more men when going beyond the wall.
“He is mad”, the men say.Â
“He wants to die.”, and he tries and tries, and tries, yet always comes back.
Jon Snow is a mad men that speaks alone at night, holds around his right hand a chain with a three headed dragon until it numbs it, that wants to die, yet refuses to at the end.
“I killed the woman I love,” he answers when asked why, in spite of the subtle attempts and his disenchantment of the world, he doesn’t die. “I killed my only child.”
One day, the men say, he will purge his sins and the White Lady will take him back.
At night, the last mad Targaryen prays for it.
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