[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

i miss you 2012 marvel fandom save me 2012 marvel fandom. put clint in the vents give thor some pop tarts have the og six living in stark tower inject me with stony and clintasha undertones. remind me of whimsy and hope and all the things we used to hold near and dear to our hearts before endgame, before infinity war, before civil war, hell before age of ultron. i want to be happy again can’t i be happy again. what happened to us

jobu topaki is such an effective way of depicting that specific depression of being in your 20s and knowing you can do anything but also knowing that knowing that means any decision you make cuts you off from an infinite number of possible realities… like every step forward also feels like a step in the wrong direction because it technically is when you’re juggling every potential consequence at once and it narrows your life down to just a matter of surviving and trying to focus on the few things that don’t make you feel like a failure and you start to see the loss of will to really live as the inevitable result to your own unstoppable loss of potential. and of course being a gay child of immigrants makes it even easier for joy to feel like there’s no future she can pursue where everything turns out okay enough to have made the effort worth it. and then contrasting that with evelyn’s reality that she is the version of herself where every decision has been the wrong one that has led her away from doing anything remarkable with her life but it’s still a life where trying is worth something, as long as she can still find people to love and things to fight for… yeah