No need to lose your head.

wardfordarkcreatures​:

“Wow, do you like, care about me?” He jabbed, as if his face wasn’t completely flushed. “You’re soundin’ like you like me or something.” He leaned close and gave her a little peck on the cheek, lingering a little bit before moving back. He was just enamored with her, but at least they could be closer later. “But uh, yeah, I’ll find some clothes that’ll fit you, I think I got something that’ll work.”

“So, I gotta get back to work, so just meet me at my car once the day’s over and we can head on over.” He started to stand, taking her free hand and giving it a little kiss before fully getting up. “See ya later, sweetcheeks.” Ah, young love. It filled him with joy. However, as soon as he got around the corner, his fingers immediately started to type out a text to his boss’s girlfriend.

> emma is coming over tonight and she’s way bigger than me and can’t fit in any of my clothes. help pls. <

“Maybe I do,” she said with a chuckle. “You think we should start dating or something?” 

“Alright, I’ll see you after work. I should be done in a few hours. All I’ve got left is a physical and bloodwork and then I’m gonna hit the gym for a bit. Hmm. Maybe I shouldn’t have had some coffee before my physical. Oh well,” Emma shrugged and then downed the rest of her drink before smiling like an idiot at Jonah’s affection. “See ya later, babe.” 

The Proxy got up from her chair and set her mug on a cart for dirty dishes before heading out shortly after. She was definitely looking forward to tonight. 

---

As for someone else, she had to deal with a coworker’s love-life apparently. And on her day off nonetheless. 

Text Sent [16:57]: Give me a few minutes and I will have extra clothing in your room. Feel free to keep them for future use as well. Buy me a few of those fancy puddings that come in the glass cups in exchange. Or a slice of raspberry cake from that fancy new café that opened up. 

After a few minutes of Red gathering spare clothes that she kept on hand for guests and other Servants, she teleported herself up into Jonah’s apartment. Once there, she was surprised to see that everything was clean and tidy unlike the other times she’d broken into it. Not like he knew. Or was sure that he didn’t know she’d been in his place before. 

Text Sent [17:04]: Your apartment is clean for once. 

When she was done sending him the text, she went over to his room and put the clothes into the drawers of his dresser. The sets of sweatpants in one and a variety of shirts in another. This man really needs to organize his clothing rather than toss everything into his hampers, she thought to herself. 

Text Sent [17:07]: Everything is put away into your drawers. Four sweatpants, four T-shirts, and four tank tops. If you need more, let me know. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

Gosh…

Once she let him go, he practically melted into a nearby seat. This was what he needed. “Y-yeah…I’d really be, well, like, okay with anything. Whatever you’d prepf-prefer to do, y’know?” He stammered. Even after all this time, talking to her was really sort of an uphill battle. “b’yeah if you wanna, stuffs open or ya.”

“Yeah I’ve sorta been trying to catch you and ask you all day, but we sorta just got a lil disjointed. Lotta stuff came up, y’know like jobs and stupid drivers who don’t respect jaywalkers…but uh, whatcha think, whaddya wanna do?”

The blonde leaned over so that she could whisper into Jonah’s ear for a quick second. “And if I prefer to do you?” she asked half-jokingly before sitting back and taking a sip of her coffee. 

“We can head over to your place together after work if that’s chill with you. I know I have backup clothes in my locker to wear tomorrow, but I would have to steal something of yours to wear for the night if that’s ok,” she told him. “If you don’t have anything special planned though, there’s some new shows we can watch on Netflix together. I think there’s also a new season of Forged in Fire we can watch and be all judgy-judgy on if you’re down for that.” 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

Jonah led the way to the equipment room, keeping an eye on Conner’s office while the pair darted across the hall. He scanned around the room, scoffing at all the supplies. “Man, can you get more cliché?” When the Proxy opened the wall, a giggle left his lips. “Well, there you go.” He pulled out his phone, snapped a few photos, then followed his girlfriend out of the room and out of the office.

“Well…shit. That was…close.” He said, putting a hand on her shoulder. “We should head out now. Tell Ward about the goings on.” After a moment to breathe, they loaded into the truck and sped off, Jonah turning the radio on to fill the air. “So…did we decide on what to get to eat? I can’t remember after all that stress.”

“Ohmyfuckinggod-” she said in a winded tone once they were out of the building and in the clear. That was... stressful. “Uh. Yeah. Let’s go and give the rundown,” she answered as she got into the truck. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

Jonah rummaged around in his pocket and pulled out a half tube-like electronic device that he proceeded to unfold. “I’ve got a scanner that’ll send things directly to Ward’s servers. I’ll go through these, you keep lookin’.” He started to slide the device over paper after paper, the tube making soft beeping noises as he went.

“So…what do you think about tonight? How are we gonna go about getting you clothes to sleep over? Should we just like…buy you some stuff to keep at my place, just in case?” After a moment, he blinked and realized what he said, spooking himself and pulling his arms in, the device buzzing angrily as he fucked up his scan. “I’m sorry, that too much? I shouldn’ta asked.”

Suddenly, the front door slammed. “WHERE THE FUCK IS CONNER?” An angry booming voice sounded through the building. It was gruff, brash, and violent, and was pissed. Next, there was heavy, thudding steps down the hall…stopping at the door. Jonah glanced back and saw a large looming silhouette through the frosted glass of the door. He frantically waved at his girlfriend to get to a corner not near the door, pulled a rather large knife from his boot, and mantled the wall right next to the entry way.

A door opened. “Ah, Ronnie. There you are.”

“Wait a minute…some shit ain’t fucking right around here. Someone else is here.” Jonah gripped the knife hard, slowing his breathing down until it was nearly stopped. 

“Yeah, I got some people here giving me a quote on that sublevel we talked about.”

“Eh, whatever.” The man grunted. “So what the fuck do you want?”

“I’ve got someone for you to waste. Come into my office, we’ll talk about it there.”

The thudding continued down the hall and then stopped, a door shutting behind them. Jonah glanced over to Nobody and nodded. “We need to get lost. I’ve got enough. We need to finish up, and fast.”

“We could just head over to some store on the way to your place if that’s chill with you, that way there’s not a ton of back and forth,” she answered as she watched him scan the papers. “You could probably buy yourself some clothes to leave at my place too if you want. That way you don’t have to borrow my clothes again.” 

When the Proxy heard the door slam paired with a loud voice, she went on guard and followed her boyfriend’s instructions, going over to corner and keeping quiet. Then when everything was quiet, she nodded back at Jonah. “Yeah. Let’s head over to the equipment room real quick and then head out,” she said in a whisper while making way for the door. She held it open for him and when he was out, she speed walked over to the equipment room and slipped into the next room. 

Once they got into room and the door was shut behind them, she started searching, but not before doing her ‘job’ and writing a few notes. At first, it looked like your basic ass office supply room. Papers, staples, sticky notes, and all sorts of other things you’d expect for an office. Hell, there was even a spare photo-copy machine in the corner. But after a quick minute, she noted a few things that were a bit off. The placement of some of the shelves weren’t where they’d generally be for most offices, and parts of the carpet were worn off. After pointing them out and feeling out the area, all of a sudden there was a-

-*CLICK*-

One of the walls moved forward like a door, revealing a set of artillery on the other side. No wonder the carpet was worn out here, this door was used often enough to cause the damage. Not only that, but it didn’t look like much effort was put into the bottom of the door to keep said damage from happening. 

Ludenberg really is a fucking dumbass. Can’t even hide shit right. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

Conner looked over the drive, clearly confused. He plugged it in, and immediately his face went red. Well, it was working at the very least. The silvered haired man looked back at the pair and coughed. “It’s, eh, numbers. Charts. You know.” He wheezed, leaning back in his chair. “You uh, no no, I don’t have any notes. You just uh, do you.”

The merc rolled his eyes and stepped out of the room, proxy in tow, and headed into the records room. A cramped room filled with filing cabinets, Jonah immediately started to leaf through folder after folder, page after page. After a few minutes, his eyes widened and a large smile crossed his face. “Hey, you know what you don’t do when you’re committing crimes?” He said, turning to Nobody and holding up a fat folder. “You don’t keep a paper trail.” It was full of transactions, very clearly showing embezzlement, thievery, and other illegal dealings, and even where all the money was being held.

Jonah had a giant, bucktoothed smile on his face. “We got it, baby.”

After they had gone out of the room and were a decent ways away from Conner’s office, the blonde finally let out a laugh. “Oh my fucking god. I can’t believe he started looking through it right there in front of us. Did you see how red his face got?” she laughed again. “Pretty sure he’s gonna think that some dude was watching porn in the server room.” She smiled stupidly as they entered the records room, still not over what just happened. 

“Damn, he really is a dumbass,” she agreed. “How’re we gonna get all this info? Should we snag some pictures or something? I know I didn’t bring anything to photocopy with and I don’t think we can get away with faxing either...” She pursed her lips and exhaled through her nose before scribbling on the clipboard some basic notes about the room like she did for room they were in earlier. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

Jonah looked around the room trying to find a port to work with, but these were servers. It wasn’t going to be quite that simple. Besides, there wasn’t any guarantee that the servers would even be able to download what the virus…but the merc had an idea of what might.

“Okay, you said that it has naughty stuff on it? And we know that Conner has been gross toward’s Ward’s girlfriend, right?” He said, his face starting to light up as he stepped closer to the blonde. “If we give it to him, he’ll definitely put it in his computer. If he sees it’s porn, then he’ll probably keep it so he can ‘use it’ later!”

“What do you think, will that work?”

“Hell yeah I think that’ll work. We can make a quick trip back over to his office to hand it over, act like we’re doing something good by finding it and immediately turning it in and shit,” she said with a grin. “Let’s head on over right now. If you want, this can probably give you an excuse to talk shit about him picking out staff that’s forgetful or something if you wanna yell at him some more.” 

Emma smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek before going over to the door and opening it for Jonah, letting him get out and then having the door shut behind him. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

“You got a point. We need to check everything we can. After this, we can double back to there and slide in and see what he’s got.” He said, gently bumping her arm with his elbow. His face was kinda red. Man, she really knew how to…affect him. Spending more time with her…she was gonna turn him into a fucking mess sooner rather than later.

As they got into the server room, Jonah’s phone pinged. Once he looked it over, his eyes widened and he tapped Nobody on the shoulder. He turned the phone to her, showing off a conversation with Ward.

Jonah [sent 12:42]: hey, do you know anything about people named ronald reich and anastasia harcourt?

Ward [received 12:43]: In what regard?

Jonah [sent 12:43]: they have offices here

Ward [received 12:45]: For the love of god, do not get caught. If you do, I fully expect Emma to die…so you can guess what expectations I have for you.

“Alright, we need to be…sneaky.” He said, taking a deep breath. “Do you do sneaky? I don’t do sneaky…”

“Oh boy,” she said after reading the texts. ”I can be sneaky-ish if that counts for anything. Also, I think I’ve got an idea on how to use the flash drive. Let’s check out the server room and I’ll tell you in there though.” 

When they got into the server room, she made sure the door was closed and started to pretend to do her job just in case someone came into the room. “Ok so, Ludenberg is a dumbass, right? We can tell him we found a flash drive in here and hand it over to him. He’ll either take it to someone that’ll figure out who it belongs to or he’ll be some snoopy little bitch and plug it into his computer. Either way, whatever Donnie put into this, it’s supposedly undetectable, can steal info, and I think it’s implied that there’s some naughty stuff in here too? We can ask more about that later. We can also hopefully find a USB port to work with in here, but I don’t know if there’s a spot for that here?” 

She scribbled on her clipboard a rough estimate on the size of the server room along with how much of what was in said room too. This would probably come in handy later. Just in case anyone in the building decided to go over the notes, she did write a note saying to be careful when constructing around this area so that the electronics wouldn’t be broken. She needed these notes to look official. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

“Oh, yeah yeah, I got blueprints right…around here somewhere.” Conner spun around in his chair and opened a filing cabinet, leafing through a bunch of papers…then he went to a different one, then another. Jonah looked over to his girlfriend with an annoyed look, rolling his eyes. Eventually, the douchebag spun back around with a large sheet of paper, placing it on the desk. “There you go. full blueprints.”

Jonah unintentionally scoffed as he stood up to look at it. “Aight, so you gotta decent lookin’ place…I think the best place t’ start would be lookin’ around yer server and records room.”

“You…really need to be in there?” Ludenberg objected. “Like, there’s sensitive shit in there.”

“Ay ay ay, you tellin’ me where I can and cannot build? You want a sublevel? It’s lookin’ like yer best bet for an entrance is those fuckin’ rooms,” Jonah said, leaning on the desk. “…So unless you wanna fuckin’ jerk us around, yer gonna let us in them rooms.” 

Conner blinked a few times, then nodded. “Right, you do you then. Come back and let me know if you can work on it.”

Jonah snatched the blueprint up and started for the door. “Riiight. Come on girly, let’s let him get back to whatever the fuck it is he does.” He led Nobody out the door, and once it was shut he snorted and started laughing. “Jesus CHRIST what an idiot! Like, fuck, I don’t think he actually understood what I was saying?? Either that or he’s just a little bitch.” He tried to stifle his voice so no one else would hear, but it was hard. “So…where do you wanna go first? Server or Records?”

“Ohmyfuckinggod,” Emma spoke out quickly, “I can’t believe you did that. The fucking balls-” she punched his arm playfully. “He seems like a total dumbass yeah, but I still can’t over how you talked to him and he just let you do it. What the fuck was up with that?” 

She started to run a hand through her hair but stopped, realizing the cap was on her head which kept her from doing that. “Oh god, I’m also a dumbass. Fucking hat. But yeah, uh, let’s go to the server room first. I don’t wanna deal with papers yet. I know Don gave me a stick for the job so-” she shrugged and shoved a hand into her pocket to make sure it was still there. “Let’s go, pretty boy.” 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

The silver haired man looked up from his computer and smirked. “You look like you’re here to deliver a package. I didn’t expect MacLeod to have such shit taste.” He jeered, standing up and gesturing for them to sit. Alright, so he was already a fuckboy. What a way to start. 

Y’know…Ward probably wouldn’t be too mad if they fucked with him. “Ay Tone, we got dis shit made by fuckin’ Versace. Our shit is mint an’ yers look like ya tryin’ to stay hip with the yoots despite bein’ fuckin’ 30.” Jonah’s natural accent had been dialed up hard, at times being nigh unintelligible. He continued to insult Conner, who pretty much just stared at him in as if he actually knew what was going on.

Once the merc finished, Ludenberg nodded a few times. “Cool.” He turned to Nobody and tilted his head. “So do you guys think you can add a sublevel to this building?”

Damn. She knew that Jonah had an accent whenever he spoke, but she’d never heard him be so upset that it made his accent even thicker and harder to understand. Hell, she didn’t even think he’d have the nerve to shit talk Ludenberg either considering they were on a job. He could fire them for fuck’s sake. Luckily, as far as she could tell, the man that hired them didn’t seem to actually give a fuck. Was he that much of a fuckboy that he didn’t care about how people talked to him? 

Huh. I guess this could be a reason why people hate him. If he’s supposed to be all high class, he shouldn’t be letting people talk down to him. 

“There’s a good chance we can do it,” Emma told him. “We’ve got the best tech for building so it’d be pretty sound if it does get done. But uh-” she paused, flipping through some papers on her clipboard, “that really depends on how the foundation is built here. Don’t think you want this place crashing down and having to start from scratch.” 

Oh hey it sounds like I know shit. Cool. 

wardfordarkcreatures​:

“Getting a pizza and not getting cheesy crust? Blasphemy.”

As the pair entered the building, Jonah immediately started to scan the room, looking for anything of note. Unfortunately, they didn’t seem to leave anything just laying around. That’s lame. All that was around were some superfluous papers and a brown haired secretary. 

“Ah, we’ve been expecting you. Mr. Ludenberg’s office is all the way down the hall. It’s the door right at the end, so you can’t miss it.”

Jonah just nodded and started walking, passing by door after door after door. McCarran…Equipment…Bathroom…then a server room and a records room. They’d have to come back for those. Although, a few names caught his eye. The names Ronald Reich and Anastasia Harcourt…they seemed familiar somehow. He quickly texted Ward with the names, hoping that his boss would have something.

He stopped by the final door and turned to Nobody with a smile. “After you.”

Emma nodded at the secretary and gave her a thanks before heading off with Jonah. She did as he did, looking around where they walked to see if anything stood out or would be worth looking into. Other than the server room, she couldn’t think of much. Maybe the equipment room would be a good place to check out. This was an office building so it most likely had office supplies and the sort, but there was a chance that it might have other shit too considering the guy that owned the building was some sleazy dude. 

She chuckled at her boyfriend, “Why thank you.” 

Once in the room, she took a few steps in but still stood relatively close to the door. She didn’t know how Ludenberg worked other than the fact that he was a fuckboy and that none of the other crimelords really liked him. Plus, at least she knew that for most meetings the guests were generally told when to sit. So she could just stand around for now until then.