askmenosecrets

I sit here and ponder what it would feel like to have you next to me.

I get caught up in my imagination. the thought of you and me......

i can just picture us sitting in your car. I look up at you and take your face in my hand. you are soft and sweet and your smell is strong and fresh. 

I look up to your eyes. the deep blue green swallows me up and i am so lost. i dont want to break the stare.  all i can think about is your lips now. it’s all i want. 

I beg you now. kiss me, please. and for once, you don’t refuse. The first kiss. the best first kiss I’ve ever had. It feels like the very first one. any past experience i’ve had with another’s lips we nothing like this one. They didn’t set me on fire like you do. they didn’t seal me to someone so important and so great. 

i need you

and i want you to love me

they are wanting

wanting to hold you.

please let me.

please don’t be all virgo’ish to this gemini who just wants to communicate please. 

im scared that i could have someone as wonderful as you, and you are so FREAKING WONDERFUL and that i could hurt you

because youre a good man.

and i want you so much

and i want to be good for you so much

and im such a sick twisted person

and i know i have it in me to be good to you

i know

im making my way back to me

and i know that being single and actually not talking to anyone but you will be really really really really really really really good for me

but im so SCARED i dont want to fuck you up and dude

im a bit

of a freaking weirdo

and it might be too much for you

so seem so innocent

i need to find out more about you

before i can promise myself to you because i am scared

im scared of myself

The way the wind brushes a flower pedal.  Soft and sweet yet without mercy.

It’s the same as the way your lips caress my soul with every lingering kiss.

It’s as though the galaxies of stars exploding violently are also within us. Within this moment.

and the nagging feeling that everything in all it’s chaos, will carry on.

Maybe not here, or maybe not now. But it will as it always has. But your lips. They pull me back in. They touch my mind. They change the hue of red and yellow. Your soul’s beauty is more than astounding and I,  I would be lost without it.

I grow weary of the words “ I love you.” It’s like eating the best food imaginable for every meal. But you must know. Know how you’ve affected me, mercilessly.

and yet there lingers on a pain. A pain that exists solely because our hearts and minds connect, but there remains a gap. Your love for me has never been complete and no matter the extent of poetry I write i am left asking if it may be that your love ever truly finds its way to me. 

I’m no dreamer, and no Fate stops me from having what’s mine. But then again co-habitating is a gateway drug. And like all gateway drugs, Im hooked in slowly and im lost forever in your deep deep baby blues. 

if theres any part of you that doesnt know how to love, let it learn. if theres any part of you that refuses to give it all, let it die. if there’s any part of you that needs to expand, let it do so. I wont ask permission or forgiveness. Only truth and firey passion. 

and he was like

 i love you

even though the urgency to see you is waining because i know you're going to be mine,  i still care about you so greatly. i still can't wait to go on an adventure with you and tell you all about my feels.

yes, the transition period is upon us. I am falling for you in a maddening sort of way, but even on days when we only text a few times and we're not entirely up each others booty holes (figuratively... yeah... let's go with figuratively for classes sake) i'm still like mann i can't wait to revise the song i wrote you and let it blossom into a more wholesome and perfect type of piece of music. It important to me that you understand how greatly i appreciate every aspect about you.

i hope we stay together. our bodies, hearts, and minds meld together in such a fashion that i can't believe.

i've never met someone that gave me such butterflies

and you are so sweet and intelligent and you can actually teach me things and communicate with me and it's sweet. you're like my favorite fruit. you're delicious and i crave you. i know there's such a thing as too much of a good thing and even that makes me happy. i'm happy because you do understand the importance of waiting to use the L word and because you understand the importance of maintaining independence. 

we have every single ingredient for a meaningful deep and harmonizing relationship and now i am just excited for time to pass and for us to grow together. the future is upon us and we will do great things together.