smooches @ask-phyllis - Tumblr Blog

Posts

Hey Phyllis! I have a few questions if that’s okay. 1.) What kinda music are you into? 2.) Who do you wanna win AS5? 3.) What’s ur moon sign? 4.) How’s your island coming? Any specific theme? 5.) Is this a permanent end to acnlconfessions or is there a possibility you’ll return when you have more time? 6.) What’s your favorite color?

1. I listen to a lot of different stuff, but lately mostly indie rock and alt-pop stuff. Lately I’ve been listening to a lot of hyperpop like charli xcx, sophie, a.g. cook, 100 gecs, and caroline polachek. Other notable mentions: kero kero bonito, grimes, snail mail, big thief, pheobe bridgers, megan thee stallion and cupcakke.

2. I haven’t watched any of this season yet! But i’ve managed to avoid spoilers. My top picks are shea, jujubee, and mayhem.

3. Sagittarius

4. It’s ok, haven’t had much time to play lately. I’m not very theme heavy but I’m going for a vaguely woodsy rustic thing I think. I want it to feel like youre really exploring in nature in my town.

5. All things are possible ~

6. Light blue or purple

#Anonymous

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

Phyllis will you still visit this blog for some occasional advice? Good luck with your studies!

yes I’ll still be popping in here to give advice B-). thanks bb

#Anonymous

People always talk about faking it until you make it but I’ve been faking it for years and idk if I’ll ever get better at this point. I’m super depressed, my self esteem is thru the floor, and I don’t want to live for my full on lifespan if things keep going like this :(

Here’s the way I see it. Even when there are constant setbacks, I keep going because while death is unknown, I know that life = opportunities. If i keep waking up every day, I will always have the opportunity to make choices and therefore have a level of influence/ control over my fate. And I’d rather choose that autonomy over the alternative. As they say, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

I understand you’ve been trying so hard and still feel this way. But progress isn’t a straight line, and I’m sure you’re underestimating your achievements. The most certain thing about life is that it’s constantly changing. You got this far, you can do this.

#Anonymous

Discord anon: thank u Phyllis! I do plan to stop talking to this clown, I appreciate you listening and giving advice!! 💞

proud of u <3

#Anonymous

Heya Phyllis, I'm that one discord anon from a little while ago? I appreciated your advice back then!! So that dude....oof :/ We haven't discussed it but I don't think I consider him a friend anymore. I decided after like two weeks to talk to him again to remind him of a mutual friends birthday and then he is all like oh hey I missed you! So I was like oh?? And for a few days it was good! And long story short he sort of led me on quite a bit and part two coming! Hope it doesn't get lost D:

Hey so part two discord, so yeah this dude I was kind of friends with and had a small crush on led me on for a bit as in he acted as if he also had a crush on me, but he didn't :/ he sort of ended up cornering me and I admitted how I felt and was ofc humiliated after we talked about that. (I think I was more upset at the fact of how happy I had been at first when I thought he did like me) but I asked if we could be friends and he was like of course! And part three headed your way ;-;

Discord anon part three: So we chatted as usual and everything was fine for a couple of days and then he stopped talking to me for a bit and eventually did respond but it would be stupid one word replies or just gifs HOWEVER he would be chatting and joking with everyone else in our mutual server. So I asked him like if we were good after like a week or two of this and he was like oh I just need to be alone for a while so I was like oh all righty so I left him be, and fourth part coming

Discord anon part 4: so he does a complete 180 in his interaction with me yet still chats with the others in our server and I just get the feeling he is only being polite to me at this point(although it's been almost three weeks since we last talked) and I'd rather him tell me straight up he doesn't want to be friends or not chat anymore. But you know Phyllis, was talking to another friend in the server and apparently the dude used to be an incel so mighta dodged a bullet there :/

I would just stop talking to this guy entirely, people like this are a waste of time. Whether or not it’s intentional, he’s screwing around with your emotions by being avoidant and giving mixed signals because he knows you’ll always be kind enough to respond. Sounds like a total energy sucker so I’d avoid him at all costs. Ur time is valuable!

#Anonymous

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

My Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria has been so bad lately and I hate it. I’ll literally say one thing that probably nobody even remembers and then beat myself up for it for days on end and then isolate myself from everyone and beat myself into a depressive spiral. I wish I could just like... chill and not be so heavily impacted by how other ppl view me. I h8 it here =(

There are parts of us that we can’t completely change or erase, but we can learn to manage them. I think that a big step in learning how to manage our emotions is dealing with shame. Imo it’s a huge part of the negative feedback loop for anxiety and depression. It’s helped me tremendously to just say to myself,“ya know what? I forgive you.” for whatever it is. It quiets something in me that otherwise would be screaming indefinitely into the abyss.

Self love can be more powerful that we give it credit for. So try your best to stop punishing yourself after rejections and show yourself some compassion. I know it’s easier said than done, but it’s also easier than it sounds if you give a try.

#Anonymous

Hi Phyllis! So I’ve been struggling with this guy I have a crush on. I almost never talk to him but we follow each other on Insta and SC. I’ve had a crush on him for like a year now and as much as I’ve tried I can’t get over him but I’m way too scared to ever start a conversation with him. I feel stuck.

I know it’s scary but I would just go for it and start interacting and chatting with him more. it’s better to have gone after someone and been rejected than to let them pass by as a “what if”. a lot of people are afraid to live their life due to rejection/failure, but you can’t really win or succeed at anything if you’re not willing to open yourself up to it. if you can overcome this you can do anything so go awf

#Anonymous

Do you know of any tips to like... Stop thinking my loved ones are lying when they say they're not mad or that they love me? It started with me asking "are you mad" etc a lot because it made the anxiety stop, but I think it just ended up making the doubt worse. Logically I know they probably aren't all lying but sometimes it still feels like that and the paranoia overcomes the logic. How do I internalize that people love me? Sorry if this is badly worded im dumb tired

something in you is telling you that it’s not possible that you’re truly loved, that people are dishonest with you for their own gain. our brain is always using our past to protect us, think about if you have some past trauma that could inform these negative thought patterns.

to accept other people’s love we have to open the door to loving ourselves. try practicing self love. dont be afraid to feel corny, write down or say to yourself in the mirror what you’re proud of. fight off or question the negative self talk in your brain and over time, it becomes quieter.

#Anonymous

Hi Phyllis, I've been struggling with the idea that i may be demi or ace lately and i feel like an alien in this sex-obsessed world. I don't really need advice, just needed to tell someone.

self discovery can be scary but it’s worth it. good on you for tapping into your intuition. jus roll with it

#Anonymous

I don't need advice just venting but Im mad at myself bc I've been biting the sides of my nails. I used to be a chronic nail biter and my nails would freak everyone out and ache all the time. I was so proud of myself when I stopped for a bit. But now my nails are still longer but the sides are all bloody and I keep picking at the sides of my nail until they split down, I feel those habits coming back bc stress. And I hate it! But ik the only thing I can do is try again I'm just. Mad at myself.

I was a nailbiter as a kid so I feel you. It’s a stressful time, so try showing yourself some kindness and forgiveness when you end up biting. Sometimes we can get addicted to the shame cycle yknow, and that just heightens the behavior.

#Anonymous

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

Phyllis, I’m feeling heartbroken and unloved .. my longest crush I’ve had on someone just went to shit.. now I see all the clear red flags I should’ve seen. He was my biggest emotional supporter ... I just feel so lost. I feel so alone

Heartbreak hurts like a bitch, sorry to hear you’re going through it. Just allow yourself to feel everything you’re feeling and you’ll get through it. At painful times I like to imagine how a year from now, everything I’m feeling now will be so distant. I know you can make it through! Message me any time you need someone to talk to

Hiya Phyllis! So I have kind of a problem with this dude? So like around two months ago, we started chatting (we've been in the same discord server for a while but hadn't talked because there were like 30 people in it and I only joined because of a friend) ANYHOO. Ofc, I developed a crush because why wouldn't I :/ but I wanted to like form a good friendship first because that can help you get to know someone and all and I'm running out of room to type hold on

Discord dude anon part three oof. Anyway. It honestly feels like im "carrying" the friendship on TOP of our conversations. But we've played animal crossing together online(we live in seperate countries which is a problem ik) and we have discussed a few rather personal things so it isn't if we're just acquaintances ya know. But he's mentioned before how barely anyone in our discord server talks to him(he doesn't talk to them much either though so I'm like??) This is gonna be a part four I'm sorry

Discord dude part four: so yeah he complains that he's lonely and no one talks to him, yet he doesn't talk to the others and! I've! Been! Talking! To! Him! Ik I said I had a crush but goddamn it's hard enough trying to be his friend when he puts maybe 2% into the friendship? And that's being generous. Idk I'm just kind of depressed about it but I think he'd think I was overreacting or something if I brought it up. It's been a week since we've chatted and he's sent nothing. Not even a hello :/

(not sure if part 2 got lost, this is all i received)

He’s afraid of being rejected, so he waits for other people to come to him. That doesn’t work very well of course because we all need to make a little effort with people in order to hold their attention. So until he learns this he’s going to continue this cycle.

There’s something universally attractive about someone who won’t give you the time of day (I think we’ve all been there) but ask yourself if it’s serving you to dote on someone who isn’t noticing or appreciating your efforts. He’s making it clear that he isn’t at a place in his life where he can give much of anything back to you, so think about if this is a friendship you want to continue.

Hey Phyllis... I think I’m non-binary and I have a really close friend who identifies as pansexual so I told him “Hey, I’m not telling anyone else but I think I’m non-binary, can you use gender neutral pronouns for me for a while?” And all he said was “wow that’s kinda hot lol” and it made me SOOOO uncomfortable and I don’t feel like I really got to talk to a friend about it, and I’m still not sure I even WANT to identify as nb, but now I can’t stand to talk to him. Any advice ? :(

I’m pro-healthy confrontation so I think it’s worth talking him about. I know it feels uncomfortable but it’s a really valuable skill to practice. If we don’t assert our boundaries with people, it can become a pattern that makes us feel powerless.

Try saying something like, “Hey, it made me feel really uncomfortable when I came to you questioning my gender identity and you said it was ‘hot’. I was really looking for some support from a friend, not something sexual.”

Maybe he will see the error of his ways and apologize, but be prepared for him to be defensive and dismissive, as people often are. An apology is nice but it’s not the goal, it’s about flexing those assertive-ness muscles that will help make situations like this easier and make you feel stronger.

Drama!Ok so I’ve been talking to this guy (it’s complicated bc we both are adults and our parents started dating last year) and we’ve been not dating but like, fucking with emotion and talking about maybe making it official later. He was suppose to see me on my birthday and couldn’t, said he would try to see me Sunday bc he was working Saturday. Turns out he went to go hang out with friends and a girl he used to fuck. So now I’m devastated bc I caught feelings and lost a friend. Am I being fair?

Yeah it’s completely logical to feel like crap when someone is dishonest and avoidant with you. He showed you his true colors so I suggest not contacting him anymore to avoid his BS. You’ll probably have to see him sometimes since your family is wrapped up in the situation, but hey just look forward to kicking him under the thanksgiving dinner table “on accident”

#nsfw

Phyllis you’re alive omg!! Where have you been and do you have ACNH? How are you?

so youve spotted me. I accidentally reblogged a photo of a fluffy bird on here instead of my main blog. #caught in the act! I have been lurking in the shadows, being an aloof kween, keeping you all guessing and stressing for no particular reason. I’m doing pretty good, all things considered; I have ACNH and I’m playing the fu*ck out of it in quarantine.

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

tkyle

“What Do You Mean?” - Justin Bieber ft. Alyssa Edwards (x)

do you thin k it's okay to call out suicidal people for problematic bullshit? (not related to their suicidal behavior) obviously not encouraging them to kill themselves or bully them or send mean messages or anything, just pointing them to their mistakes?

I think everyone should be held accountable for harmful behavior. Just because you're hurting doesn't mean you should hurt others--and this is coming from someone who has been suicidal/had depression. Just approach the situation with care.

Trending Blogs

Last Seen Blogs

smooches