how do men this weak even manage to survive
men: what are these feminists talking about? we don’t objectify women
also men: the ideal woman is literally just an object shaped like a woman’s body
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@ashvicii
how do men this weak even manage to survive
men: what are these feminists talking about? we don’t objectify women
also men: the ideal woman is literally just an object shaped like a woman’s body

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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say what you will about gen z but being able to say “it is wednesday my dudes” in the middle of a class and knowing they will respond with an ungodly screech? absolutely unbeatable
*texts bae at 3am* hey baby, according to this buzzfeed quiz you’re only 48% in love with me ????? hmm 📝
u know what’s really fun and in style right now? making others feel loved and valued
john mulaney played spider-ham because he’s horny for death.

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I just saw a video captioned “teach your children to care” and it was sweet but pissed me off.
So the whole class is in a classroom getting out their lunches and one kids lunchbox is empty. So he goes to get water and be away from all the food. When he canes back he finds his lunchbox full of food from other kids. And like yeah that’s sweet but why would that kid need to be given food from other kids when schools should be giving food to hungry kids for free. Like yeah teach kids to share but with toys and things. They shouldn’t have to share their food. This is a thing the government does where they make you think for things to get better YOU have to be the one to give things up. And yeah you should give things you don’t need. But you should not be responsible for feeding people. The government could be putting money into schools and places to give them food, fresh and healthy food.
i want to get to a point where i can just love myself. not because i like the way i look in someone else’s eyes but because i like the way i look in the mirror. in my heart of hearts. bc people are not guaranteed. i’m the only guarantee in my life you know? i want me to be in love with me. so i don’t need someone else to do it.
that’s what i am working on now. that’s what i’m going to aim for. screw everything else.
for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’
jerry is here
my chinese teacher once shared this story in class about someone who went to the grocery to buy chicken, but they forgot the english word for it, so they grabbed an egg, went to the nearest sales lady and said “where’s the mother”
things i say that confuse and worry my coworkers:
“happy birthday” every time i hand them something
“well, that’s not ideal” whenever something is going wrong
“we are in the timeline that god abandoned” whenever i’m mildly inconvenienced
“can’t you see that your fighting is tearing this family apart?” whenever two or more coworkers are arguing
referring to taking medication as “eating medicine”
“time to go back to prison!” when putting animals back in their cages
referring to inanimate objects as (s)he, particularly when i break something and say “oh no, he’s dead.” this concerns them especially when i follow it up with “that’s not ideal”
“what are they gonna do, fire me?”
I work in a blood bank, and constantly refer to blood types as flavors, such as “Oh, you need two units? What flavor is he?” And my older coworkers just look at me confused but my coworker that’s my age doesn’t miss a beat and responds “A Pos”
this is probably my favorite comment on this post so far

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What part of “i don’t wanna spend anymore money” don’t I understand
Literally
“How long they choose to love you will never be your decision.”
— Drake; Thank Me Now
STORY TIME:
I work in a decent sized, local, indie bookstore. It’s a great job 99% of the time and a lot of our customers are pretty neat people. Any who, middle of the day this little old lady comes up. She’s lovably kooky. She effuses how much she loves the store and how she wishes she could spend more time in it but her husband is waiting in the car (OH! I BETTER BUY HIM SOME CHOCOLATE!), she piles a bunch of art supplies on the counter and then stops and tells me how my bangs are beautiful and remind her of the ocean (“Wooooosh” she says, making a wave gesture with her hand)
Ok. I think to myself. Awesomely happy, weird little old ladies are my favorite kind of customer. They’re thrilled about everything and they’re comfortably bananas. I can have a good time with this one. So we chat and it’s nice.
Then this kid, who’s been up my counter a few times to gather his school textbooks, comes up in line behind her (we’re connected to a major university in the city so we have a lot of harried students pass through). She turns around to him and, out of nowhere, demands that he put his textbooks on the counter. He’s confused but she explains that she’s going to buy his textbooks.
He goes sheetrock white. He refuses and adamantly insists that she can’t do that. It’s like, $400 worth of textbooks. She, this tiny old woman, bodily takes them out of her hands, throws them on the counter and turns to me with a intense stare and tells me to put them on her bill. The kid at this point is practically in tears. He’s confused and shocked and grateful. Then she turns to him and says “you need chocolate.” She starts grabbing handfuls of chocolates and putting them in her pile.
He keeps asking her “why are you doing this?” She responds “Do you like Harry Potter?“ and throws a copy of the new Cursed Child on the pile too.
Finally she’s done and I ring her up for a crazy amount of money. She pays and asks me to please give the kid a few bags for his stuff. While I’m bagging up her merchandise the kid hugs her. We’re both telling her how amazing she is and what an awesome thing she’s done. She turns to both of us and says probably one of the most profound, unscripted things I’ve ever had someone say:
“It’s important to be kind. You can’t know all the times that you’ve hurt people in tiny, significant ways. It’s easy to be cruel without meaning to be. There’s nothing you can do about that. But you can choose to be kind. Be kind.”
The kid thanks her again and leaves. I tell her again how awesome she is. She’s staring out the door after him and says to me: “My son is a homeless meth addict. I don’t know what I did. I see that boy and I see the man my son could have been if someone had chosen to be kind to him at just the right time.”
I’ve bagged up all her stuff and at this point am super awkward and feel like I should say something but I don’t know what. Then she turns to me and says: I wish I could have bangs like that but my darn hair is just too curly.“ And leaves.
And that is the story of the best customer I’ve ever had. Be kind to somebody today.
I didn’t reblog earlier.
So I am now.
Be kind. It’s worth the effort.
Tumblr when they were removed by Apple from the App Store:
Tumblr “working as quickly as possible to resolve the issue”:
Tumblr on December 18th looking for 60% of their users:
Underrated post

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harry, first year: oh my gosh, the forbidden forest sounds so dangerous! i’d better stay away from it.
harry, seventh year: so i’m having a barbecue in the forbidden forest, who wants in
They were the snipers of the Third Shock Army.
Third row, middle, with the big grin? That’s Red Guard Lieutenant V.I. Artamonov (Artamonova?). She set the Soviet military record: 89 successful hits, one miss.