tiny lobsters are tearing this nation apart

skips every song on my ipod

lets the music play without interruption

If you look at Denmark on a map you might notice a white dot near the very top of the country.

That my friend is a huge sand dune that arose out of the sea 300 years ago and is slowly eating its way through the landscape at 18 meters a year.

And if you look closer you might notice that it’s heading straight for the towns Rannerød and Hulsig and when that happens no one will come to save them because the dune is protected. At least they’ll see it coming.

That means that in a few hundred years we won’t just have a sanded church, we’ll have sanded towns with more roofs and towers sticking out of the dune than any tourist bureau could wish for.

Because the dune is a very popular tourist spot. I myself have been to it a few times and it’s quite the experience for a child to suddenly be in a “desert” in Denmark.

If you feel sad for the people in the towns just remember that’s nature. The reason why the dune is protected is because the area used to have many more but people made an effort to destroy them and it fucked up the ecosystem in the area. The dunes leave moist wetland behind that loads of rare creatures thrive in.

So today the inevitable end of the towns are viewed as sort of romantic poetry about nature, the march of time and appreciating the now.

A lot of his most interesting and most deeply moral characters are angry ones. Granny Weatherwax, Sam Vimes, Tiffany Aching. All are to a large extent driven to do good by anger.

I want to add that I don’t make a habit of this now that I am a law abiding adult, but recently I accidentally did this again. Having been used to having my run of hospitals and walking basically anywhere as a child, I was visiting a friend in the hospital just before covid and I was legitimately exhausted and carrying a coffee cup cuz it was like 5:30am or something dumb, and I went to leave and get to the bottom floor and i’m like “this is not the lobby” and I walked around for a bit and people kept holding doors for me so I traveled through many corridors, and nothing looked familiar, and then I realized every single door was a key card swipe and everyone had mag-stripe badges with varying security levels and I realized I had gotton onto a staff elevator with the staff, who had swiped their card to go down into a high-security area of the building, and people had just been letting me through all these security doors.

So then I had to out myself and be like “Um I accidentally broke into you high-security wing, please show me the door, I’m literally just trying to leave this hospital” and I had to get like searched and stuff. 

And what was funny was that while I was blissfully walking around assuming I belonged, No one questioned ANYTHING and in fact, were violating protocols left and right to let me through, but the VERY SECOND I realized I was not where I was supposed to be and let that show on my face, like three people in the hall confronted me. 

So the take away is, be confident that you belong, look exhausted and like you don’t want to be there, and carry a cup of coffee. It will open pretty much all doors.

I finally attracted the notice of someone who was meant to be part of this restoration project when I came back up from the hole. He quickly came over to ask me, in Italian, what I’m sure were the very normal questions of “Who are you?”, “What are you doing here??”, etc.

Problem: I do not speak Italian.

My brain’s solution: Quick, what language do we speak that’s close?! 

And that is how I wandered up out of a hole in a Roman ruin without warning and began speaking ancient Latin to an archaeologist.

This man’s face went through 15 different absolutely floored expressions in ten seconds, like you could physically see him going through the thought process of “Have I encountered a ghost from ancient Rome? No, ghosts aren’t real. But if ghosts not real, how Latin??? Fellow researcher??? Supposed to be here???”