i'm not your princess

how come women were considered weak for being “gatherers”. girlies were out there digging and collecting in the dirt for hours while the men were waiting for a deer to waddle by

gatherers: ‘cause while you were sitting around, waiting, doing nish, I was out, making moves

Luke “I tried being heterosexual once but it turned out to be my sister” Skywalker

i used the bittenbinder method. when i saw the perp approachin’, i chewed up a tab of alka-seltzer i carry with me at all times. this created a foaming-at-the-mouth appearance that made it look like i had rabies. now i’ve thrown him off his rhythm, and she’s calling a cab, while he’s having a smoke, and she’s taking a drag, now they’re going to bed, and my stomach is sick, and it’s all in my head, but she’s touching his