not jason

German is a great language. Sometimes, when we’re mildly annoyed we exclaim “Human” And I think that’s neat.

Last time I’ll pester about this! If you’re over 18 and have a spare 10 minutes, it would be great if you could do my survey! :) 

me: *misses my train by 6 seconds* me: if i didnt stop to look at that bird that one time when i was 10 i would have been 6 second ahead in life and this wouldn’t have happened.

tumblr friendships are hard to maintain like im sorry i know i havent talked to you in 5 months but you’re still super rad and i still consider us friends im just dumb

#if you’re wondering if this is for you #it’s probably for you

If I have ever messaged you or messaged me and never heard from me again, I still consider us friends. I just suck

also I’m awkward and don’t know how to start conversations, sorry.

what kind of banksy ass shit is this

In Texas weeds tumble you.

That’s actually how it works.

Crows: smart enough to not only remember but convey to their buddies which humans were nice to them that one time and which were jerks, but dumb enough to get their heads stuck in fences, apparently.

There are humans who manage to get their dicks stuck in toasters I really don’t think we get to judge

Are u shitting me afkgjfndjdjsj