Diaries of an Anxious Diamond @anxiousdiamond - Tumblr Blog

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The Boston Girl- Anita Diamant

Where the Crawdads Sing- Delia Owens

Play it as it Lays- Joan Didion

On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous- Ocean Vuong

Behind the Beautiful Forevers- Katherine Boo

Milk and Honey- Rupi Kaur

The Sun and Her Flowers- Rupi Kaur

Bad Feminist- Roxane Gay

This Side of Paradise- F. Scott Fitzgerald

A Room of One's Own- Virginia Woolf

The Color Purple- Alice Walker

The Bad Girl- Mario Vargas

The Scarlet Letter- Nathanial Hawthorne

Girl, Interrupted- Susanna Kaysen

The Awakening- Kate Chopin

To Kill a Mockingbird- Harper Lee

Their Eyes Were Watching God- Zora Neale Hurston

A Vindication of the Rights of Women- Mary Wollstonecraft

God Help The Child- Toni Morrison

On the Road- Jack Kerouac

I was told there'd be cake- Sloane Crosley

Funny Girl- Nick Hornby

The Daylight Marriage- Heidi Pitlor

My Paris Dream- Kate Betts

Educated- Tara Westover

Bird by Bird: some instructions on writing and life- Anne Lamott

Bright Lights, Big City- Jay McInerney

Girl, Wash Your Face- Rachel Hollis

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck- Mark Manson

I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings- Maya Angelou

Americanah- Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Everything I never told you- Celeste Ng

Little Fires Everywhere- Celeste Ng

Normal People- Sally Rooney

The Year of Less- Cait Flanders

The Drama of the Gifted Child- Alice Miller

Codependent No More- Melody Beattie

Scary Close- Donald Miller

Women Who Love Too Much- Robin Norwood

The Book of Waking up- Seth Haines

The above is 40/100 books I will be reading during my book marathon. Please feel free to send me any of your book recommendation! I still need 60 more to complete my list!!

Happy Reading! 💖

#Thebookmarathon

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My 100 Book Enlightenment Era

Hello!

Partially due to recent societal events, I have decided to read 100 books. A self-education marathon, if you will.

Of course there are always the added benefits of improved vocabulary, writing skills, etc. But I have decided that rather than conform to what I was taught for 18 years, I will take matters into my own hands, and read. Find my own conclusions, listen to other sides of the story, go to the sources. For once in my life, I’m going to figure out what I believe in, why, and love myself unconditionally, through it all.

My goal is to educate myself, and inspire others. Whether that means starting to read again, follow along with me, start a conversation with someone on a taboo subject, it doesn’t matter. I just want to be a catalyst for positive change. I’m breaking the chain of generational thinking towards race, gender, culture, sexuality, politics, etc. and I know I’m not the only one out there that wants to rewire their childhood thinking. So join me! Pick your own list! Adjust your number of books! You do you!

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” - C.S Lewis

#bookmarathon #changingmyfuture #endingthegenerationwithme #myenlightenmentera

profoundinqq

Women are not made whole by men. Women are made whole the moment they enter this world.

Anne with an E - Anne Shirley Cuthbert (via profoundinqq)

sylviaplathstypewriter-deactiva

ears-awake-eyes-opened

“Some children decide that accommodating their parents’ wishes is the safest way to survive in a world of powerful adults and best way to win their parents acceptance and love. They try to be good and not make waves. “Good” means what parents want. Their parents may have had high expectations, been critical, had rigid rules, withheld love or approval, or punished them for “mistakes,” dissent, or showing anger. Some children learn to acquiesce merely by observing their parents’ actions with each other or another sibling. When parental discipline is unfair or unpredictable, children learn to be careful and cooperative to avoid it. Many of us are more sensitive and have a low tolerance for conflict or separation from parents due to genetic makeup, early interactions with parents, or a combination of various factors.

Unfortunately, becoming a people-pleaser sets us on a path of becoming alienated from our innate, true self. The underlying belief is that who we are isn’t lovable. Instead, we idealize being loved as a means to self-worth and happiness to the point that we crave it. Our need to be accepted, understood, needed, and loved causes us to be compliant and self-effacing. We conclude, “If you love me, then I’m lovable.”…

Preserving our relationships is our uppermost mandate. We strive to be lovable and charitable and reject character traits that we decide won’t serve that goal. We can end up squelching entire chunks of our personality that are incompatible, like showing anger, winning competitions, exercising power, getting attention, setting boundaries, or disagreeing with others. Even when not asked, we willingly give up separate interests that would mean time away from a loved one. The slightest look of disappointment (which we may inaccurately infer) is enough to deter us from doing something on our own.

Assertiveness feels harsh, setting limits feels rude, and requesting that our needs be met sounds demanding. Some of us don’t believe we have any rights at all. We feel guilty expressing any needs, if we’re even aware of them. We consider it selfish to act in our self-interest. We may even have been called selfish by a selfish parent or spouse. Our guilt and fear of abandonment may be so strong that we stay in an abusive relationship rather than leave…

We’re not aware that each time we hide who we are to please someone else, we give up a little self-respect. In the process, our true self (what we really feel, think, need, and want) retreats a bit more. We become accustomed to sacrificing our needs and wants for so long that we may not know what they are. Decades of conveniently accommodating “just this time” whittles away at our connection to our true self, and our lives and relationships begin to feel empty of joy and passion.

It’s possible to change and find our voice, our power, and our passion. It requires getting reacquainted with that Self we’ve hidden, discovering our feelings and needs, and risking asserting and acting on them. It’s a process of raising our sense of self-worth and self-esteem and healing the shame we may not even know that we carry, but it’s a worthy adventure of self-reclamation.

Darlene Lancer, “Are You a People-Pleaser”

anxiousdiamond

yep

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anxiousdiamond

One day...

vogueandcoffee

"We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving…We pride ourselves on getting as little sleep as possible and thrive on self-deprivation. We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins…We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We never want to be as passive-aggressive are our mothers, never want to marry men as uninspired as our fathers…We are the daughters of the feminists who said “You can be anything” and we heard “You have to be everything.”

Courtney Martin

anxiousdiamond

Glorifies the adaptation to trauma, but still... I didn’t know other people were like this.

beba1510

#goals

adventure-heart

A lovely day

#travel

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Some days I miss the old me. Other days I'm looking for a "new me". And then there's those days I don't give a fuck about the future or the past, I'm just trying to survive the present.

Anxious Diamond

#livingwithdepressions #depression #mentalhealth #justtryingtosurvive

She overthinks because she was under-loved.

A.D Woods

#feminism #love #lovequotes

Welcome!

This is my safe space to speak my mind and publish my inner thoughts. Aesthetically pleasing, honest, and satisfying.

Please respect my thoughts and views; I am not here to argue. This is my therapy. My alternative to twitter ;)

***If you are in any way struggling and need advice, a listening ear, or both, please email me @[email protected]

-Anxious Diamond

#AnxiousDiamond #DiariesofanAnxiousDiamond

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