i'm the bad guy.

Ogata stared at Catra, Catra stared at Ogata. For them this was pretty much the closest thing they could have to a normal conversation. She had been stalking him for a few blocks, darting between alleyways, but he didn’t need to know that. 

“I was just looking for a sucker to pay for my food and you seemed easy.” 

That was a lie of course, nothing with Ogata or Catra involved was ever easy. Even the silence between them, definitely un-easy. Catra sat down next to him taking his invitation. 

“How come you always hang out alone at events like this? Is it because you’re a huge loser that nobody likes? Well, you’re lucky, I’m so popular I could hang out with anybody but I choose to spend it with you.” 

Again. That was all a lie. Of course, of course. 

“ Well, look at you”, Ogata flatly responds, “ being all good and proper. Tending to poor lonely souls. “

He opens the box, tossing a salmon nigiri at her, trusting she’d catch it. Like he’d to a stray. He then helps himself one right after. 

Catra rolled her eyes. Even if he was obviously being sarcastic she just couldn't let that one slide. Wait...

Catra's ears dropped in shock. She dropped her soup right in her lap. Her tail frizzed up. Her mouth hung open in total bewilderment, showing two pronounced fangs. The hairs of her head seemed to stand on end, her mane fluffing like a lion's and she said with her mouth still open.

"Did you just tell a joke?"

Catra said, before breaking out into a smile.

"Oh my god, you just told a joke. And now you're trying to bribe me with food."

Catra swiped away the onigiri, and began talking with her mouth full.

“What do you know about friendship you’re terrible at it.” Catra was too, but it took two to dance, and two to fight. If Catra was going to be dragged down,s he’d grab on tight to allure and make her fall down with her. That to Catra was the truest expression of friendship. Friends were people who shared all the same wounds.

Really, she was feeling embarrassingly mushy right now as she finally lost her temper and drew her claws on Adora. “Oh Adora. That might be the only smart thing you’ve said this entire conversation.” Catra tried to grab her by both shoulders and dig her claws in. With the sweetest affection. There were no peaceful morning conversations between the two of them, only violent wake up calls.

That’s what Catra knew and liked. That was why she liked the league. Adora just wouldn’t understand though, she knew that.

Adora liked to talk, liked to smile, she just didn’t understand this. “Good morning, lover. Gimme a kiss.” She said as she tried to turn her body around and throw Adora.

“So are you,” Adora was quick to mumble, resisting the urge to pout. She didn’t need any reminders about how bad she was at communicating with others, not with the biggest example right beside her.

She didn’t mind Catra’s claws– their sharp sting was familiar, just like Catra’s tongue and wit. Adora knew it well, and she had come to expect it. Even when Catra inevitably chose violence, Adora wasn’t all that surprised.

(Though, a kiss might not have been unwanted; Adora even imagined it for a second as Catra threw her away.)

Yet, when Adora’s body hit the floor, she just huffed, blowing strands of blonde hair out of her own face.

“So, what?”

"No, I want to ruin you even more."

Sometimes even Catra couldn't believe the things that came out of her mouth. What she wanted to ruin this nice and peaceful morning, ruin the easy going atmosphere between them, everything built up she wanted to tear it down with her claws, but that was a little more difficult to put into words. Actions always spoke louder.

When Adora was on the floor Catra was on top of her immediately. She wanted to brea something but didn't know what, she raised a hand in the air thinking it might be Adora's nose, and then landed on a playful boop. All she did was poke the tip of her nose.

She didn't get why Adora wasn't fighting back, just that she didn't like it.

“Why can’t I - ? It’s cuz because I’m bored and have nothing going on with my life.“

That was almost a bit too honest. Even Catra seemed to notice, recoiling for a moment.

“Whoa, awkward. Said a little bit too much there.”

However, even a brief moment of self-awareness was too much for her. She would much rather go on playing the bad girl and the tease. Besides, with the amount of people watching she had an audience now.

Catra decided to push things a little bit further. It was a temptation she was always dealing with, she hated taking things seriously, so she played, and played, and played until something broke.

She drew out her claws, and swiped trying to leave just one tiny scratch on Kaede’s face. Just enough to draw blood.

“Come on, you’re no fun at all.” Catra complained, before pointing at her own cheek. “Hey, princess you’ve got something on your face right there. No, no, right over there.”

“Well, I, I, uh, uhm…”

Kaede was floundering, both from the shock of the overall situation, and how the other teenager suddenly, unexpectedly recoiled.

Awkward was an understatement.

If Kaede had been paying close enough attention, perhaps she could have used this moment to flee. Yet, such a suggestion was merely an afterthought, and it was far too late by the time Kaede came to that realization. So, the sudden cut of Catra’s claws caused the blonde to yelp.

“What did you do that for?!” Kaede exclaimed, as if she hadn’t hit Catra twice by now.

“No, stop that! Don’t touch me!”

Catra's face was bruised up from the two times she had been struck but besides that, she was having the time of her life. "I'm not touching you!" She said as she held a claw just short of Kaede's face. Truly, she was the master of all evil.

"Because I'm bad. Because I'm a murderer. Because..." She was desperate for attention. Catra just could not leave things alone. Until just now she was spending another melancholy day, ignoring everyone else and being ignored by them in return and now she was having the time of her life. "Don't you know all cats are evil?"

“Since when do you want to spend all this time together anyways? Why don’t you just run off and save people like you normally do? I’m sure there’s a cat stuck in a tree somewhere…”

Catra ripped the bandage off, to prove she was fine. Her shirt came off next, to prove she did not care if Adora was watching. She started getting dressed right there with clothes she found on the floor, ignoring the presence of the other girl in the room.

“Adora’s being really annoying right now, how do I make her go away?”

Catra asked no one in particular.

“I know what if I really need her to stay this time, that’ll do it.”

Perhaps, Catra could say something nice for once but she didn’t wake up in a good mood this morning. She woke up on the wrong side of the bed every morning. She thought she might be happy with how close her and Adora were acting lately, but every time she thought about it she got scared Adora might go away again, and then if she thought about it too long she became completely useless.

She knew what was going to happen next anyway, so why bothered getting attached this time?

“Why do you want to meet my friends anyway? It’s not like you ever wanted your friends to meet me.”

“You’re the only whiny cat around here,” Adora quickly snapped. 

That sounded a lot better in her own head than it did coming out of her mouth.

 Before she could try and recover her failed quip, Catra began to undress and Adora’s brain paused. Staring was rude, someone had once told her, but she was forgetting that particular piece of advice right now. It was only until Catra spoke that Adora looked away, covering her eyes with both hands in an awkwardly childish manner.

(Of course, she only did so for a few moments, soon lifting up a finger or two to peer at Catra again.)

“What?”

“I mean, uh…”

Think, Adora, think!

“I…” I don’t want to see him. “I want to meet this Himiko person you keep talking about. And, you did meet Bow and Glimmer… it was just, you know… complicated?”

"Yeah, well, Himiko doesn't want to meet you. She doesn't even like you. She's my friend, not your friend. You can't have her!"

Catra decided to wake up mad. If only she could be the friend Adora wanted, but the mention of Bow and Glimmer caused her ears to fall. She was reminded one more time, the only reason why Adora was here with her right now. It was only because she had nowhere else to go.

Adora belonged with better people that was the simple truth. She should. She should just... the reason Catra was with the league of villains was because a stray cat had nowhere else to go, but try to prowl through the trash pile for food.

"I have three friends and you only have one friend, I win!"

Catra tried to keep laughing, but she felt herself sobering up. They just couldn't fight the way they used to, like children, now whenever they fought it drew blood. She turned around her tail dragging on the floor behind her.

Enough with the pleasantries. Catra did not feel like saying, anything pleasant.

She let go of Adora (though she was relucant to do so), in order to cross her arms and turn away. Catra was always, holding back on all of her feelings at once when she talked to Adora but now there was just bitterness in her voice. As if she had given up on that conflict. As if she had surrendered.

“Does it hurt? I dunno. I don’t feel anything anymore.”

That was a lie, but she wanted it to be true.

Catra scratched at the scar on her belly, as if it was bothering her. An itch that would not go away. A pain that would not leave her. Just like the marks Adora left on her. She thought of it with fondness. She associated pain with friendship, and with love, because she didn’t know any better, maybe that’s why she was such a pain in the ass. Catra refused to look at Adora.

“Can you just leave now? I really don’t want my friends to see you. It’d be sooo embarrassing.”

Adora felt the way Catra’s touch lingered. She reached out, wanting to grasp at Catra’s writst, but stopped mid-way, and let her arm fall to her side. She wanted nothing more than to lay back down with Catra at her side, to spend the day in bed with nothing to bother or distract them.

As if they would actually allow themselves that, though.

“It looks like it still hurts,” the blonde mumbled, eyes downcast.

Yet, at Catra’s request, Adora’s head snapped up.

“Me? Embarrassing?” Said Adora, hair a mess, half-clothed, and dried drool on her cheek. “Are you serious?”

"Since when do you want to spend all this time together anyways? Why don't you just run off and save people like you normally do? I'm sure there's a cat stuck in a tree somewhere..."

Catra ripped the bandage off, to prove she was fine. Her shirt came off next, to prove she did not care if Adora was watching. She started getting dressed right there with clothes she found on the floor, ignoring the presence of the other girl in the room.

"Adora's being really annoying right now, how do I make her go away?"

Catra asked no one in particular.

"I know what if I really need her to stay this time, that'll do it."

Perhaps, Catra could say something nice for once but she didn't wake up in a good mood this morning. She woke up on the wrong side of the bed every morning. She thought she might be happy with how close her and Adora were acting lately, but every time she thought about it she got scared Adora might go away again, and then if she thought about it too long she became completely useless.

She knew what was going to happen next anyway, so why bothered getting attached this time?

“But fighting is so much fun. It’s the best way to make friends.” 

Catra didn’t look like a person who had any friends, though.  She looked like she had been waiting for someone to start a fight. She looked deeply angry. She looked every bit the cat, playing with the mouse instead of killing it and eating it, she had no intention of letting Kaede go.

Her cheeks were still red, it was impossible to tell if she was blushing or Kaede’s little slap had hurt that much. 

Catra raised her hand like she might slap Kaede back, but all she did was end up cupping the girl’s cheek. She held onto it like it was precious china she was afraid to break. 

“Is that what you want? To be left alone? But isn’t that you know… lonely?”

Catra had no idea what she was doing. She was just, pressing every button possible. She just wanted to start a fight, and if she didn’t get what she wanted she’d throw a tantrum for sure.

Kaede slapped away Catra’s hand, idly noting how weird that it was fuzzy. This person probably wasn’t wearing a costume like she had originally thought. Maybe that wasn’t the best thing to focus on right now, considering that she had no escape, and her terrible attempts on deescalating the situation were failing.

“Yes! I want you to leave me alone!”

“Why can’t you just do that?!”

Kaede tried to shove her way passed Catra, but it was immediately clear the difference in strength. That did not deter the blonde, however, as she tried to shove Catra away again, and again, and again. When that didn’t work, she resorted to shouting once more.

That was almost a bit too honest. Even Catra seemed to notice, recoiling for a moment.

"Whoa, awkward. Said a little bit too much there."

However, even a brief moment of self-awareness was too much for her. She would much rather go on playing the bad girl and the tease. Besides, with the amount of people watching she had an audience now.

Catra decided to push things a little bit further. It was a temptation she was always dealing with, she hated taking things seriously, so she played, and played, and played until something broke.

She drew out her claws, and swiped trying to leave just one tiny scratch on Kaede's face. Just enough to draw blood.

Catra’s claws came out immediately. What was it, six in the morning? It was the perfect time to be at each other’s throats. It really was impossible for them to be next to each other after all, “You don’t say shit about Shigaraki. He’s the only one who wants me around.“

She held them at Adora’s throat. Adora probably thought she was playing around, and Catra thought so too, which is why she teased a single claw down Adora’s neck, her collarbone, she was halfway between wanting to caress it and break it. “What do you know anyway?” Adora had struck a nerve. Adora, always struck every nerve. It was impossible to be in the same room with her without feeling like her entire nervous system was on fire. “What do you know about real friends? Where are your friends? Oh right, they’re not here right now.”

Catra let go of Adora. A little bit, tired of the same old dance with her. She lifted her shirt to reveal the healed over scar in her stomach. “I’ll tell you something about real friends, at least they stab each other in the front instead of going behind your back and making new friends.” 

Adora immediately bristled in response, just like Catra’s fur.

“That’s not true!”

I want you.

She did not recoil at Catra’s claw; instead, she leaned forward towards the other woman, not caring at all if she might bleed. Her hand lay atop a pillow that was swiftly taken and slapped into Catra’s mane of wild bedhead-esque hair.

“I know…” Adora’s tone started out strong, but it soon died in her throat at Catra’s comments obviously regarding Bow and Glimmer; it stung more than her claws. “I know…. stuff–”

Adora sucked in her teeth, inhaling sharply at the sight of Catra’s scar. Though she had just thrown a pillow, Adora reflexively reached out to touch Catra’s fur. She stopped herself right before making direct contact, however, Adora’s hands now awkwardly hanging in the air.

Enough with the pleasantries. Catra did not feel like saying, anything pleasant.

She let go of Adora (though she was relucant to do so), in order to cross her arms and turn away. Catra was always, holding back on all of her feelings at once when she talked to Adora but now there was just bitterness in her voice. As if she had given up on that conflict. As if she had surrendered.

"Does it hurt? I dunno. I don't feel anything anymore."

That was a lie, but she wanted it to be true.

Catra scratched at the scar on her belly, as if it was bothering her. An itch that would not go away. A pain that would not leave her. Just like the marks Adora left on her. She thought of it with fondness. She associated pain with friendship, and with love, because she didn't know any better, maybe that's why she was such a pain in the ass. Catra refused to look at Adora.