My Mind Is A Hurricane ❌⭕❌⭕

After the accident on the ice, Shane’s in a coma for a few days & wakes up thinking it is November 2008 & that he needs to pack for the Prospects Cup. He has to skip the rest of the season & move in with his parents for a while.

His phone got broken right before the game, & all of the data was lost — including the text exchanges between Jane & Lilly. With the help of his parents & countless newspaper articles & videos, he manages to recover some of his memories, but he can’t shake the feeling that something very important is missing. Or rather, somebody very important.

Ilya continues playing the season but is a mess. He can’t concentrate & plays the worst games of his life, making everyone wonder when the star player became the star loser.

Off the ice, Ilya is an even worse mess. He isolates himself & pushes everyone away, too scared of accidentally breaking down while not alone & outing Shane & his feelings for him. He drowns his grief in alcohol to forget Shane for at least a few moments & develops an alcohol addiction. Sometimes he tortures himself by drinking while watching old interviews & game videos of Shane, & he always ends up crying himself to sleep on his couch.

The feeling of missing something drives Shane crazy. He can’t sleep & often wakes up thinking about Boston & having the urge to go there. After another sleepless night, he spontaneously flies to Boston. Aimlessly, he wanders through the city until he stumbles upon a very drunk Ilya at a bridge.

Drunken Ilya couldn’t stand being in his apartment anymore, so he wandered aimlessly through the city until he came to the bridge. He thinks about jumping & putting an end to the pain in his heart when suddenly Shane appears next to him. Still drunk, Ilya thinks he is hallucinating & angrily screams at Shane in Russian for forgetting about him & leaving him all alone in this world, just when he had finally admitted to himself that he was in love with Shane.

Shane doesn’t understand a word his rival is saying & people have told him they hate each other, but he can see that Ilya is in a mentally unstable state. Somehow, Shane manages to calm Ilya down & get him to let Shane take him back to his apartment. Even though Shane doesn’t know where Ilya lives, somehow his feet remember the way & successfully lead them there.

At Ilya’s apartment, Shane manages to undress him (leaving him in his boxer shorts) & put him to bed, ignoring the butterflies in his stomach when Ilya lays his head on Shane’s shoulder or the warm feeling left by Ilya’s hands on his skin.

When Shane turns around to leave Ilya’s bedroom, Ilya says, “Shane, stay.” It is the first thing he says to him in English & also the first time that night he says Shane name instead of Hollander. Shane’s mind is telling him to go, but somehow his body doesn’t listen & he lies down next to Ilya, who immediately snuggles up to him. For some strange reason, this feels very familiar, almost like coming home. The two fall asleep & for the first time since the accident, Shane sleeps through the night.

Shane wakes up before Ilya & admires him. He feels the urge to kiss him but decides to get up & make breakfast instead. In Ilya’s kitchen, he suddenly craves tuna melt sandwiches & makes them using a recipe from his head, though he can’t remember where he learned it. Once they are finished, he returns to the bedroom with two plates and finds Ilya quietly sobbing.

Unknown to Shane, Ilya had woken up earlier. He couldn’t remember exactly how Shane had ended up in his bed, but thinking this might be the last time he would ever be this close to the love of his life, he had tried to memorize every little detail about him. Not ready to face Shane, he pretended to still be asleep when Shane woke up & got out of bed. Once Shane was gone, he broke down.

When Shane tries to comfort him, Ilya loses control. He screams in English at Shane, “Why did you forget me? Why did you leave me alone?” & begins to trash his own bedroom. Eventually, Shane manages to stop him & holds him in his arms. While Ilya cries, Shane suddenly sees himself & Ilya in a hotel room, with Shane comforting him the same way he is now. Then he sees the two tuna melt sandwiches forgotten on the dresser. This triggers another memory of them eating tuna melts on the couch in Ilya’s living room. Then, like a sudden tsunami, everything comes back to him.

“Lilly,” Shane breathes out, making Ilya’s head snap up. “Ilya,” he then says — the first time he has used Ilyas first name since they met on the bridge. Shane leans down & kisses him. Ilya is surprised at first but then kisses back once he realizes that Shane remembers them.