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Ik I haven’t posted in a while, but I’m really focused on writing rn lol, that’s the problem with having too many hobbies 😩 I’ll get back into dividers eventually <3 THANK YOU FOR ALL THE SUPPORT AND LOVE I GET FR, I’m so glad everyone enjoys this blog so much! And ik I suck at answering inboxes and dm’s so I am sorry for that lol, but I’ve always been that way. My 15 yr old wattpad days are coming at me full force and I’ve fr just been writing and trying to get even better at it. I’ve also been getting back into drawing as well, which is obviously pretty difficult 😩 thank you for all my followers cause DAMN I got a bunch now, and for all the likes, reblogs, and comments <3 I appreciate all of it !!!!!
𝓅𝑒𝓃𝓊𝓂𝒷𝓇𝒶 𝄞𝄢𓂃 ࣪˖ a relationship existing in the partial shadow between light and dark, often symbolizing a love found in darkness.
𝔭𝔞𝔦𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔤: edward cullen x fem!cullen!reader
𝔭.𝔰.: pls enjoy and thanks for reading! xoxo
❝𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐄. She’s mad about something… maybe it’s the rain. I know she and Emmett had plans.❞
You had mumbled softly from your spot at the vanity, your cold fingers brushing through your thick hair as you looked at Edward in the reflection.
Indeed, the rain sprinkling outside had cast the forest in gloomy grays and heavy fog. The wall-long windows of your shared room condensed and misty-eyed.
The room itself—a newly refurbished one for both you and Edward to fit—was lit with candle flame and the sporadic white flashes of lightning in the distance.
Edward himself sighed slowly from his position on the large bed—deep blue colors and gray accents. Your preference, of course.
A moment of comfortable silence passed before he spoke, gracing your words with a small smile of amusement on his sharp lips.
“It’s her reservation. Apparently Emmett forgot to make it. Carlisle is… handling it.” He spoke in that usual smooth cadence, quietly, like the thrum of a harp over rain-danced forests.
You chuckled in response to that, but Edward spoke again, clearly listening in to their thoughts from downstairs as he stilled and perked his head up.
“Emmett finds it funny. Carlisle is thinking that…” he paused and his lips twitched, “…that Rosalie is being dramatic.”
He chuckled at that himself, his lips spreading wider into a gentle smirk that crinkled his golden eyes. Still, he did not look up completely from the page of the verbose novel he was reading on his knee.
Your own eyes, gold as his, lingered on the expression with fondness.
A lovelorn smile stretched over your own glossed lips as you smoothed your hair over your shoulder and considered yourself blessed.
You cherished the moments he smiled; cherished the moments he shared them with you all the more.
Another flash of lightning lit up the room in pale white. The boom was heard in your amplified ears miles away yet it didn’t startle you; you were too distracted with the yellow glow of Edward’s eyes before it disappeared.
Then, when the room settled once more and Edward’s smile lingered, you responded.
“Aw, that’s sweet.”
You turned around in your vintage stool—silver filigree boning and blue, plump cushion—to look at him fully. As you crossed your right leg over the left, your teal colored robe slid off your smooth thigh, tastefully, of course, but you paid it no mind.
Edward looked up then, easy smile on his lips as the flickering, candlelit shadows of the room seemed to make his pale face all the more angled and… beautiful.
You felt your own heart thaw at the sight.
“What-Sweet? Why would you think that?” He asked with a kind tone, slightly astounded yet not surprised.
Edward was never one to truly raise his voice louder than a feather, but you heard him clearly over the rustled weather.
You shrugged slightly, “Well… I think it’s sweet that Rosalie wanted to go out with the man she loves and is angry because she couldn’t. And I think… maybe Emmett should take it more seriously. But I know he’ll make it up to her. He always does. Defending love… I find it sweet.” You preened, dragging your eyes up from the floor to Edward’s bright, warm gaze.
“And… that’s all any person wants. Someone to shine for them when the rain pours. Right?” You shrugged again as if you didn’t just shatter the room with such sweet sincerity.
Your bright amber eyes twinkled in the orange glow of the room like two embers of fire.
Edward was transfixed, naturally, from the sheer light you radiated in the darkness that consumed him.
He took a moment to stare at you after your response, red lips fading from a smirk into something softer, something more reverent as he stared into your eyes like a lost sailor prays to the moon for guidance.
It made you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear bashfully, adjusting your silk robe over your leg just for it to slide back down.
“… you’re amazing, you know that?” He mumbled it like a priest whispers a psalm; worshipful and gracious.
It always made you want to blush when he said things like that, if you could.
All you could do was smile sheepishly in response, dropping your gaze to the floor when the moment became too intense.
Edward himself closed his book, eyes never leaving your face as he sat up a little straighter in the bed. The comforter shifted and he swallowed thickly, like a man trying not to appear so lovesick.
“Maybe… but so are you. So… shhhh.” You teased gently, standing up from the stool and putting a manicured nail in front of your lips as you shushed him with as much conviction as a kiss.
He stared at you all the while, tender smile flickering back in place when he briefly caught the way the robe piled back around your knees.
He didn’t stare too long there, too chivalrous.
When he looked back up to your face, another flash of lightning stunned the room into white and shadow. He, of course, admired you closely when it did.
Him—draped in shadow on the plush of the mattress below you like a demon draped in linen. And you—lit up in white light like an angel called for his atonement.
Something holy, precious, and entirely beautiful. Something so rare and dear only a higher power could have crafted it with the skilled hands of someone in love.
Your femininity, cold skin, plush lips, thick hair, and golden eyes that seemed to glow brighter in the stormlight, almost as if to reflect the inner warmth of your soul.
And that teal robe, the color of ocean jewels and lagoon water, silky and soft on your pale skin where he knew you wore barely enough to be called modest beneath it.
You were empyreal. You were his. And you were the most divine thing in all of creation.
His hands found your waist when you made it to his side, your knee sinking into the cushion as the book fell away and you laid your hands on his narrow shoulders.
His cold palms were felt through the thinness of your clothes but to you, of course, it felt only comforting, like the feel of cool lake water in the middle of fall.
“You are so beautiful.” He whispered simply like he didn’t just compare you to his religion and sin when you were finally sat with him, his arms resting around your waist as you sat on his thigh.
Your own hands were on his arms as you looked at him, smiling delectably once more at his words and the molten gold of his eyes.
You slapped his shoulder with the might of a rose petal in tandem with another bold lightning strike.
A flash of white before it was dark again.
“Stop it… you stare too much.” You grinned lightly, humbled as always by his endless affection.
He smiled back at that, kissing your temple with the confidence and swiftness of a man who wouldn’t be told he couldn’t.
“I mean it…” he said faintly, cracking a wider smile at your reaction as the rain softly beaded on the window behind him.
It seemed to be louder than the volume of your voices, but ever quieter than the love that sung between pauses.
You didn’t reply, merely fluttering your eyes down to your lap as his shirt bunched slightly in your nimble fingers—a visceral, understated response to the warmth filling your chest.
“Am I not allowed to stare at my girlfriend?” He teased after that, lithe fingers gently pressing into your back when you didn’t reply.
Perhaps a way of getting your attention when he felt he lost it, or perhaps a way to ground himself from kneeling too far into worship.
You teetered a small laugh at that, “I suppose you can… just not so much. It makes me…” You paused, his dark button up shirt timidly bunched in your fingers again as you caught yourself.
You looked up at him once again when you felt his heavy stare.
He was looking down at you, close, captivated, listening patiently, when the smell of him filled your nose.
It was intoxicating as always. Like clean bergamot, cedarwood, sweet floral and something entirely spicy. It was a coldly beautiful scent mixing in with the rain outside, like a statue stood glistening in the dying moss of a foreboding winter.
You loved it.
It distracted you.
And he noticed.
Edward rubbed your back soothingly, angling his head down to meet your gaze again.
“…Makes you what? Nervous?” He seemed amused by the idea, but also entirely self aware of it as his lips quirked wider until his teeth showed in that attractive way he managed.
You pursed your lips, guilty and slightly embarrassed by it.
Damn him.
“I guess you could say that…” You murmured as rain gently hit the glass like reminding you of its presence—or reprimanding your own heart for feeling flustered by love.
Edward only smiled wider at that as he pulled you closer to him, chuckling into your hair like he wasn’t smelling you at the same time.
“Amazing… I turn you into a monster and you still get embarrassed because of me.” He hummed against you with another fond chuckle.
His shoulders gently shook underneath your palms as you found yourself smiling also.
Still, after a moment of just relishing in the closeness of the other you felt him dim; it was obvious in the way he sighed, in the way he pressed into your back more, in the ways only you could know having loved him so long.
You smoothly pulled your hands away from his shoulders and up, easing him away from your shoulder to look at him. Your cold palms cradled his sharp jaw, tenderly, carefully, as you looked into his eyes.
His smirk died down to a frown and your eyes followed his tragic expression with grace.
His eyebrows furrowed as he looked down from your loving gaze to your lap, like a guilty conscience weighing him down and telling him he didn’t deserve it.
You angled his head back up to look at you; he only gave a measly smile of false comfort, but it didn’t last long before twisting into something more somber and sad.
Your heart ached at the anguish in his eyes as his hands pressed into your waist harder. A feeling, a need, a plea—as if you’d ever leave his side.
“You did not turn me into a monster. You are not a monster. Won’t you stop saying that word?” You pleaded, making him look at you when he wanted to look down again.
Your thumb caressed his narrow cheekbone as he gave you that same broken smile.
He exhaled a breath from his nose, could’ve been a scoff, leaning forward to rest his forehead on yours like he needed that connection anyway.
He closed his eyes as his hands left your waist and rose, wrapped around your wrists instead, gentle but firm; needing to keep your comfort on him, your light near him.
You gave him that patience to collect himself as you stroked his cheek once more.
His throat bobbed when he spoke, leaning into the action subtly.
“You’re right, I apologize… it just drives me crazy that you’re so… good. That what I am never bothered you. That I never scared you, even when you were a human. You’re so… different,” he shook his head like he still couldn’t figure you out, scoffing slightly, “It scares me to love you so much because now I have you forever. I couldn’t bear the thought of you ever… ever hating me for what I did to you. For turning you into… one of me. I was never good, (y/n)… but you make me… good.”
Edward opened his eyes slowly following that, eyes that burned with love and conviction when they met yours. You stared back at him similarly, but gentled with concern.
He squeezed your wrists barely, continuing, whispering slow like it pained him to say such things out loud—which for him, it did.
“…And I can never lose you. Not again. Not ever.” He swallowed back his emotion.
“You promised me forever… and I’m learning that monsters don’t…don’t have to be bad.”
A moment of heavy silence passed as his words lingered between you, a confession with weight and a plea plagued with fear.
You felt your own heart swell with adoration and sympathy all at once from his words; at the pained look in his eyes and the way he held onto your wrists to keep your hands on him.
To keep himself tethered from breaking entirely at the thought.
It hurt you that he even considered such theories, but you knew him… and it did not surprise you so much as pardon your relief at finally hearing them.
You gave him a heartfelt smile, shaky at best, as you cooed at him.
“Edward, my love…”
His eyes closed once more at the sentiment like it was too much for him to handle—or more than he thought he deserved—as he leaned closer to you despite it.
“Don’t…” He mumbled so quietly, so softly. Only he could make such a simple word bleed with so much ache.
His hands unclenched from your frigid wrists and wrapped around your waist to hug you close, very close, until his body was flush to yours and he was holding you like you were the one he needed to console.
His forehead fell to your shoulder and his pointed nose brushed your hair as he settled, holding you like his last hope.
You wrapped your arms around him tightly in response, one hand going up into his hair and cradling his head there to soothe him.
“Do not worry about such things. I would never, ever, hate you, or despise you, or resent you, or loathe you or whatever your mind tells you. I wanted this. I wanted this so that I could be with you, forever, just as I promised. You are perfect, and you are mine, and I will forever cherish it… so please, just… just stay here. And stop being so silly, okay?”
You tried to tease him a little to soothe his melancholy and clear the air that seemed so thick. Which, by the movement of his cheek on your shoulder, told you well enough he had smiled, even if only a little.
It made you sigh gratefully in response, not obviously, when you heard his small snort. The familiar one he always did when he thought you had said something ridiculous but loved you anyway.
The earnest emotion in your voice, though, seemed to have satiated him as he sagged against you completely, trusting you to love him back in the moments he needed it most.
You reciprocated the sincerity, squeezing him gently as your eyes found the dark tree-line outside where rain still sprinkled dew on the leaves and mist curled the branches.
But the skies were starting to lighten.
“I love you…” You mumbled sweetly, quietly, closing your eyes and resting your cheek on his shoulder in sacred union.
You felt his body relax, his hands ever so gently rubbing your lower back as he breathed. Just breathed. And let the storm pass.
“…hmph…” he smiled softly into your skin.
“I’ll love you beyond what I am… because forever still isn’t enough time with you, (y/n).”
You giggled at that, leaning back just enough to press a fond kiss to his hair.
“So dramatic…”
And yet… it made you swoon anyway.
𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖗𝖔𝖉𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖓𝖌: penumbra!Reader
I’m really getting back into writing lately… except I only like twilight now and I plan on living my childhood dreams via tumblr via me via me writing twilight stuff on tumblr mmkay? Which I would say is kinda a dead fandom but IDC I’LL REVIVE IT!
credits to me. feel free to use and save. of course credit would be appreciated but it is not required. I’m just making these for fun <3 dividers I’ve made to fics and things that are sitting in my drafts and decided to share.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
˚₊‧ʚ♡ɞ‧₊˚ I understand, writing is hard, very hard. You want to make a story that will pull readers in and intrigue them, you want to write something visionary and amazing and unique, something that will keep the reader reading. Nobody wants to make a boring story, and we learn to write based off of what we read. Therefore, it can be easy for aspiring writers to copy whatever they see thinking it’s visionary and amazing and unique. WRONG SO WRONG YOU’RE SO DAMN WRONG. No offense. <3
⋆˙⟡♡₊˚⊹. 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒚 𝒕𝒐 𝒂𝒗𝒐𝒊𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒔𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒐𝒏 𝒑𝒉𝒓𝒂𝒔𝒆𝒔, 𝒕𝒓𝒚 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍. 𝒘𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒖𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒅𝒊𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒃𝒆 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕’𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝒔𝒐 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒅. 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕’𝒔 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒘, 𝒔𝒐 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒏 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒔𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑮𝑹𝑶𝑾 .⊹˚₊♡⟡˙⋆ also, please note that writing is subjective, it all depends on the reader to judge whether a cliche is good or not. This is just a list of cliches I don’t really like. And remember cliches are good, but they’re better when you add your own twist to them so people don’t get turned off by it.
Here’s a good link to visit
ONE. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ their tongues fought for dominance , no, no, and no. This will simply not do. It’s sooo so so so overused and cliche and weird. If you use this in a story I guarantee you’ll lose customers.
TWO. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ using orbs to describe eyes , his glowing orbs, orbs as dark as night, it just sounds funky and I don’t see it used a lot a lot, but still try to avoid it. in my opinion it just sounds weird, I guess it just depends on how you use it in a sentence.
THREE. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ ( person a ) didn’t know where they ended and ( person b ) began , now this is a tough one because it depends on context. You can write this, just try to change the wording. I used something similar to this in a story of mine but it wasn’t word for word. This phrase alone is overused, so just try and change the wording of it, if that makes sense.
FOUR. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ he forced his tongue down her throat , again, something that is overused and sounds weird. It can depend on context when you use it, but it needs to be a hot scene for it work. just try to avoid or rephrase it, or make it fit into the scene.
FIVE. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ he glared daggers into her , overused af. there’s other ways to describe a piercing glare.
SIX. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ sparks going off when person a kisses person b , there are other ways to describe a first kiss with someone, but I used to see this one a lot. They would always say sparks went off when he kissed me and I was like nahhh
SEVEN. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ person a released a breath they didn’t know they were holding , now this one isn’t that bad in my opinion, but when written word for word it can be very overused. There’s other ways to write holding your breath that you can make unique to you as writer. This exact phrase is overused, but you can always change the wording depending on the context.
EIGHT. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ you like what you see? , tbh, ig this one isn’t that bad and it can depend on the character saying it, but I think it’s so corny and cliche for someone to say. If I see it written, I immediately think the author just isn’t that good at dialogue 😭
NINE. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ his eyes darkened , apparently people don’t like this one, but I do 😭 I don’t think it’s that bad, and it all depends on context and how repetitively you use it. Using it once is good, but if you keep repeating it then it feels repetitive and unoriginal. is it overused? Yes, I’ve even used it. Is it that bad? No. 9/10 for me.
TEN. ꒱ ₊˚⊹ his gaze sent shivers down my spine , my thing with this is it is kind of unrealistic as you do not shiver when someone looks at you. However, you can feel uncomfortable and your skin can get that chilled feeling, so it’s not so far off. This is another phrase you may want to reword as the literal phrase is overused.
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝑪𝑶𝑵𝑭𝑬𝑺𝑺𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺 𝑪𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑻 𝑨𝑺 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬... ₊˚⊹♡ ˚✎𓂃 tucked between 𝓻𝓲𝓫𝓫𝓸𝓷 and 𝓹𝓪𝓰𝓮𝓼—my 𝓼𝔀𝓮𝓮𝓽𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓵𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓯𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼. or, in other words, things I shouldn’t 𝓼𝓪𝔂 but 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 anyway… ┊┊❁ཻུ۪۪♡ ͎. ｡˚ 𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓪𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓲𝓪°
𓂃۶ৎ 𝐅𝐀𝐐'𝐒 .ᐟ ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ this is where you’ll find the 𝓪𝓷𝓼𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓼 to my 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓺𝓾𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓵𝔂 𝓪𝓼𝓴𝓮𝓭 𝓺𝓾𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼! as in how I 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓶𝔂 𝓭𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓼, different 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓮𝔁𝓽𝓼, and… eh, 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽'𝓼 𝓲𝓽 really. ꒰˚₊‧ 𝓜𝓨 𝓓𝐎𝓵𝓵 𝓓𝐈𝐀𝐑𝓨: ✐˚ ༘ 𓂃⊹
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙞 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙢𝙮 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨 ! ₊˚⊹♡
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙞 𝙙𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙚𝙭𝙩 ! ₊˚⊹♡
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙚𝙨 ? ₊˚⊹♡ (coming <3)
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙘 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙨 ? ₊˚⊹♡
☆ ── i do not take fanfic requests. I barely write as it is, I’ll just let you down.
☆ ── of course ! all dividers on my page are f2u and edit however you want <3
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙣𝙜𝙨 ? ₊˚⊹♡
☆ ── i get my pngs from a range of places. pinterest, tumblr, picsart. but i also make a lot of my own pngs.
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙙𝙤 𝙞 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 ? ₊˚⊹♡
☆ ── credit is not required to use my dividers unless explicitly stated. a tag can be found crediting me when you repost. In the tag section for my dividers it includes the tag, ‘credits to me @anitalenia for dividers no credit needed if using + free to use ⸝⸝.ᐟ⋆’
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣𝙡𝙤𝙖𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙨 ? ₊˚⊹♡
☆ ── i download my fonts from dafont.com, but there’s plenty of other sites to use !
⟡˖ ࣪ ˚✎𓂃 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 ? ₊˚⊹♡
☆ ── my name is anita (anitalenia) and i am 22 yrs old. i love making dividers, graphics, and posting a short fic every three years lol. I’m a scorpio sun, gemini rising, taurus moon…
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𝓅𝑒𝓃𝓊𝓂𝒷𝓇𝒶 𝄞𝄢𓂃 ࣪˖ a relationship existing in the partial shadow between light and dark, often symbolizing a love found in darkness.
𝔭𝔞𝔦𝔯𝔦𝔫𝔤: edward cullen x fem!cullen!reader
𝔭.𝔰.: pls enjoy and thanks for reading! xoxo
❝𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐄. She’s mad about something… maybe it’s the rain. I know she and Emmett had plans.❞
You had mumbled softly from your spot at the vanity, your cold fingers brushing through your thick hair as you looked at Edward in the reflection.
Indeed, the rain sprinkling outside had cast the forest in gloomy grays and heavy fog. The wall-long windows of your shared room condensed and misty-eyed.
The room itself—a newly refurbished one for both you and Edward to fit—was lit with candle flame and the sporadic white flashes of lightning in the distance.
Edward himself sighed slowly from his position on the large bed—deep blue colors and gray accents. Your preference, of course.
A moment of comfortable silence passed before he spoke, gracing your words with a small smile of amusement on his sharp lips.
“It’s her reservation. Apparently Emmett forgot to make it. Carlisle is… handling it.” He spoke in that usual smooth cadence, quietly, like the thrum of a harp over rain-danced forests.
You chuckled in response to that, but Edward spoke again, clearly listening in to their thoughts from downstairs as he stilled and perked his head up.
“Emmett finds it funny. Carlisle is thinking that…” he paused and his lips twitched, “…that Rosalie is being dramatic.”
He chuckled at that himself, his lips spreading wider into a gentle smirk that crinkled his golden eyes. Still, he did not look up completely from the page of the verbose novel he was reading on his knee.
Your own eyes, gold as his, lingered on the expression with fondness.
A lovelorn smile stretched over your own glossed lips as you smoothed your hair over your shoulder and considered yourself blessed.
You cherished the moments he smiled; cherished the moments he shared them with you all the more.
Another flash of lightning lit up the room in pale white. The boom was heard in your amplified ears miles away yet it didn’t startle you; you were too distracted with the yellow glow of Edward’s eyes before it disappeared.
Then, when the room settled once more and Edward’s smile lingered, you responded.
“Aw, that’s sweet.”
You turned around in your vintage stool—silver filigree boning and blue, plump cushion—to look at him fully. As you crossed your right leg over the left, your teal colored robe slid off your smooth thigh, tastefully, of course, but you paid it no mind.
Edward looked up then, easy smile on his lips as the flickering, candlelit shadows of the room seemed to make his pale face all the more angled and… beautiful.
You felt your own heart thaw at the sight.
“What-Sweet? Why would you think that?” He asked with a kind tone, slightly astounded yet not surprised.
Edward was never one to truly raise his voice louder than a feather, but you heard him clearly over the rustled weather.
You shrugged slightly, “Well… I think it’s sweet that Rosalie wanted to go out with the man she loves and is angry because she couldn’t. And I think… maybe Emmett should take it more seriously. But I know he’ll make it up to her. He always does. Defending love… I find it sweet.” You preened, dragging your eyes up from the floor to Edward’s bright, warm gaze.
“And… that’s all any person wants. Someone to shine for them when the rain pours. Right?” You shrugged again as if you didn’t just shatter the room with such sweet sincerity.
Your bright amber eyes twinkled in the orange glow of the room like two embers of fire.
Edward was transfixed, naturally, from the sheer light you radiated in the darkness that consumed him.
He took a moment to stare at you after your response, red lips fading from a smirk into something softer, something more reverent as he stared into your eyes like a lost sailor prays to the moon for guidance.
It made you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear bashfully, adjusting your silk robe over your leg just for it to slide back down.
“… you’re amazing, you know that?” He mumbled it like a priest whispers a psalm; worshipful and gracious.
It always made you want to blush when he said things like that, if you could.
All you could do was smile sheepishly in response, dropping your gaze to the floor when the moment became too intense.
Edward himself closed his book, eyes never leaving your face as he sat up a little straighter in the bed. The comforter shifted and he swallowed thickly, like a man trying not to appear so lovesick.
“Maybe… but so are you. So… shhhh.” You teased gently, standing up from the stool and putting a manicured nail in front of your lips as you shushed him with as much conviction as a kiss.
He stared at you all the while, tender smile flickering back in place when he briefly caught the way the robe piled back around your knees.
He didn’t stare too long there, too chivalrous.
When he looked back up to your face, another flash of lightning stunned the room into white and shadow. He, of course, admired you closely when it did.
Him—draped in shadow on the plush of the mattress below you like a demon draped in linen. And you—lit up in white light like an angel called for his atonement.
Something holy, precious, and entirely beautiful. Something so rare and dear only a higher power could have crafted it with the skilled hands of someone in love.
Your femininity, cold skin, plush lips, thick hair, and golden eyes that seemed to glow brighter in the stormlight, almost as if to reflect the inner warmth of your soul.
And that teal robe, the color of ocean jewels and lagoon water, silky and soft on your pale skin where he knew you wore barely enough to be called modest beneath it.
You were empyreal. You were his. And you were the most divine thing in all of creation.
His hands found your waist when you made it to his side, your knee sinking into the cushion as the book fell away and you laid your hands on his narrow shoulders.
His cold palms were felt through the thinness of your clothes but to you, of course, it felt only comforting, like the feel of cool lake water in the middle of fall.
“You are so beautiful.” He whispered simply like he didn’t just compare you to his religion and sin when you were finally sat with him, his arms resting around your waist as you sat on his thigh.
Your own hands were on his arms as you looked at him, smiling delectably once more at his words and the molten gold of his eyes.
You slapped his shoulder with the might of a rose petal in tandem with another bold lightning strike.
A flash of white before it was dark again.
“Stop it… you stare too much.” You grinned lightly, humbled as always by his endless affection.
He smiled back at that, kissing your temple with the confidence and swiftness of a man who wouldn’t be told he couldn’t.
“I mean it…” he said faintly, cracking a wider smile at your reaction as the rain softly beaded on the window behind him.
It seemed to be louder than the volume of your voices, but ever quieter than the love that sung between pauses.
You didn’t reply, merely fluttering your eyes down to your lap as his shirt bunched slightly in your nimble fingers—a visceral, understated response to the warmth filling your chest.
“Am I not allowed to stare at my girlfriend?” He teased after that, lithe fingers gently pressing into your back when you didn’t reply.
Perhaps a way of getting your attention when he felt he lost it, or perhaps a way to ground himself from kneeling too far into worship.
You teetered a small laugh at that, “I suppose you can… just not so much. It makes me…” You paused, his dark button up shirt timidly bunched in your fingers again as you caught yourself.
You looked up at him once again when you felt his heavy stare.
He was looking down at you, close, captivated, listening patiently, when the smell of him filled your nose.
It was intoxicating as always. Like clean bergamot, cedarwood, sweet floral and something entirely spicy. It was a coldly beautiful scent mixing in with the rain outside, like a statue stood glistening in the dying moss of a foreboding winter.
You loved it.
It distracted you.
And he noticed.
Edward rubbed your back soothingly, angling his head down to meet your gaze again.
“…Makes you what? Nervous?” He seemed amused by the idea, but also entirely self aware of it as his lips quirked wider until his teeth showed in that attractive way he managed.
You pursed your lips, guilty and slightly embarrassed by it.
Damn him.
“I guess you could say that…” You murmured as rain gently hit the glass like reminding you of its presence—or reprimanding your own heart for feeling flustered by love.
Edward only smiled wider at that as he pulled you closer to him, chuckling into your hair like he wasn’t smelling you at the same time.
“Amazing… I turn you into a monster and you still get embarrassed because of me.” He hummed against you with another fond chuckle.
His shoulders gently shook underneath your palms as you found yourself smiling also.
Still, after a moment of just relishing in the closeness of the other you felt him dim; it was obvious in the way he sighed, in the way he pressed into your back more, in the ways only you could know having loved him so long.
You smoothly pulled your hands away from his shoulders and up, easing him away from your shoulder to look at him. Your cold palms cradled his sharp jaw, tenderly, carefully, as you looked into his eyes.
His smirk died down to a frown and your eyes followed his tragic expression with grace.
His eyebrows furrowed as he looked down from your loving gaze to your lap, like a guilty conscience weighing him down and telling him he didn’t deserve it.
You angled his head back up to look at you; he only gave a measly smile of false comfort, but it didn’t last long before twisting into something more somber and sad.
Your heart ached at the anguish in his eyes as his hands pressed into your waist harder. A feeling, a need, a plea—as if you’d ever leave his side.
“You did not turn me into a monster. You are not a monster. Won’t you stop saying that word?” You pleaded, making him look at you when he wanted to look down again.
Your thumb caressed his narrow cheekbone as he gave you that same broken smile.
He exhaled a breath from his nose, could’ve been a scoff, leaning forward to rest his forehead on yours like he needed that connection anyway.
He closed his eyes as his hands left your waist and rose, wrapped around your wrists instead, gentle but firm; needing to keep your comfort on him, your light near him.
You gave him that patience to collect himself as you stroked his cheek once more.
His throat bobbed when he spoke, leaning into the action subtly.
“You’re right, I apologize… it just drives me crazy that you’re so… good. That what I am never bothered you. That I never scared you, even when you were a human. You’re so… different,” he shook his head like he still couldn’t figure you out, scoffing slightly, “It scares me to love you so much because now I have you forever. I couldn’t bear the thought of you ever… ever hating me for what I did to you. For turning you into… one of me. I was never good, (y/n)… but you make me… good.”
Edward opened his eyes slowly following that, eyes that burned with love and conviction when they met yours. You stared back at him similarly, but gentled with concern.
He squeezed your wrists barely, continuing, whispering slow like it pained him to say such things out loud—which for him, it did.
“…And I can never lose you. Not again. Not ever.” He swallowed back his emotion.
“You promised me forever… and I’m learning that monsters don’t…don’t have to be bad.”
A moment of heavy silence passed as his words lingered between you, a confession with weight and a plea plagued with fear.
You felt your own heart swell with adoration and sympathy all at once from his words; at the pained look in his eyes and the way he held onto your wrists to keep your hands on him.
To keep himself tethered from breaking entirely at the thought.
It hurt you that he even considered such theories, but you knew him… and it did not surprise you so much as pardon your relief at finally hearing them.
You gave him a heartfelt smile, shaky at best, as you cooed at him.
“Edward, my love…”
His eyes closed once more at the sentiment like it was too much for him to handle—or more than he thought he deserved—as he leaned closer to you despite it.
“Don’t…” He mumbled so quietly, so softly. Only he could make such a simple word bleed with so much ache.
His hands unclenched from your frigid wrists and wrapped around your waist to hug you close, very close, until his body was flush to yours and he was holding you like you were the one he needed to console.
His forehead fell to your shoulder and his pointed nose brushed your hair as he settled, holding you like his last hope.
You wrapped your arms around him tightly in response, one hand going up into his hair and cradling his head there to soothe him.
“Do not worry about such things. I would never, ever, hate you, or despise you, or resent you, or loathe you or whatever your mind tells you. I wanted this. I wanted this so that I could be with you, forever, just as I promised. You are perfect, and you are mine, and I will forever cherish it… so please, just… just stay here. And stop being so silly, okay?”
You tried to tease him a little to soothe his melancholy and clear the air that seemed so thick. Which, by the movement of his cheek on your shoulder, told you well enough he had smiled, even if only a little.
It made you sigh gratefully in response, not obviously, when you heard his small snort. The familiar one he always did when he thought you had said something ridiculous but loved you anyway.
The earnest emotion in your voice, though, seemed to have satiated him as he sagged against you completely, trusting you to love him back in the moments he needed it most.
You reciprocated the sincerity, squeezing him gently as your eyes found the dark tree-line outside where rain still sprinkled dew on the leaves and mist curled the branches.
But the skies were starting to lighten.
“I love you…” You mumbled sweetly, quietly, closing your eyes and resting your cheek on his shoulder in sacred union.
You felt his body relax, his hands ever so gently rubbing your lower back as he breathed. Just breathed. And let the storm pass.
“…hmph…” he smiled softly into your skin.
“I’ll love you beyond what I am… because forever still isn’t enough time with you, (y/n).”
You giggled at that, leaning back just enough to press a fond kiss to his hair.
“So dramatic…”
And yet… it made you swoon anyway.
𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖗𝖔𝖉𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖓𝖌: penumbra!Reader
I’m really getting back into writing lately… except I only like twilight now and I plan on living my childhood dreams via tumblr via me via me writing twilight stuff on tumblr mmkay? Which I would say is kinda a dead fandom but IDC I’LL REVIVE IT!
⊹₊⟡⋆ 𝓐𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐑𝐀. ✦ ݁˖ 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘭𝘦 𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯 𝘹 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘸𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘭𝘦 ✦ ݁˖ The lights symbolize a fated, unique, and extraordinary love that is hard to find, mirroring the rarity of a perfect, lasting partnership.
𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐋𝐄𝐃 𝐎𝐍 𝐀 plum-colored velvet chaise in your private room with the opulence of a fainted widow, a dainty hand laid on your chest and the other resting gently above your crown.
Your hair was fanned out elegantly on the velour pillow beneath you like silk spilled over a throne.
Your dress—mauve and tasteful—was hitched too high around your thighs from the languid, careless way they were angled over the cushion.
You couldn’t be bothered to adjust the hem, preferring to be more admired than modest.
“I am too tired to walk, Carlisle…” you sighed softly, turning your chin just enough for your husband to notice your practiced fragility—no matter how theatrical it was.
Carlisle himself stood at the large golden mirror across from you, buttoning his dark coat with careful attention. He caught your pout in the reflection and his lips curved into an amused smile.
“My love, you do not get tired. It is impossible,” he chuckled fondly, deft fingers working seamlessly on the last button before he turned towards you.
You merely rolled your head away and fluttered your eyes shut, releasing another dramatic sigh as he walked towards you with patient, even steps.
“You know nothing,” you mumbled indignantly, burrowing your cheek into the cushion with a polished sulk.
Carlisle hummed softly, crouching down beside you with a gentle gaze as his shadow enveloped you.
His left hand touched the edge of the chaise as his right hand, cold and pale, gently grabbed your wrist off your chest and held it to his own with reverence.
He squeezed it slightly to rouse you but you merely sunk deeper into the cushion, hiding the smile starting to show.
He sighed quietly, indulging you, “You are right… I apologize.”
You barely nodded, still too delicate to show interest, “…go on.”
His smile grew as he continued.
“What can I do to make it better? Maybe we shouldn’t go on our trip if you’re—“
You immediately whipped your head back around to look at him incredulously. Your eyes bulged and your plush lips parted wide.
You let out a horrified noise that made Carlisle smother a laugh.
“Excuse me?! Nothing is going to be cancelled! I need this trip, Carlisle! I was just going to propose you carry me there because I am so tired and fragile!” you whined loudly, gripping his hand and pulling him in close as if sheer drama and noise could drive your point across.
Carlisle only laughed handsomely, bringing your manicured hand up to his soft lips and tenderly kissing your palm.
His left hand swiftly moved to your cheek, where he caressed the skin there and moved stray hair behind your ear.
You leaned into the action subtly enough as to not announce it, but he noticed anyway.
He rested his fingers on your shoulder with a twinkle in his eye—a twinkle that gleamed with a specific form of amusement only an immortal who’s endured you for so long could seek enjoyment from.
He chuckles as your lips pout.
“Ah… I would have done it anyway. Your comfort is my priority no matter the cost… or have you forgotten?” He says fondly, sharp lips in a smile as he gently squeezes your hand.
You sigh sweetly, leaning towards him and unclasping your hand to wrap both of your arms around his neck.
“Mm, you are too perfect. I’d surely die without you. Thank you.”
He smiles softly, but triumphantly, as you peck his lips.
He rubs your back gently when he responds.
“I would not let that happen… besides, you are too dramatic to go quietly, my dear. It’s something I choose to admire.”
You gasp playfully, your forehead nearly touching his in his hold.
“I am not dramatic! I am a woman with standards and a man who loves her. It’s your fault if I am.”
He smiled in shameless agreement.
“Yes… and I wouldn’t change it for the world.”
He pats your back gently, twice, before standing up and heading to the open suitcases on the bed.
“Now finish packing, hm? I would like to leave before the evening—Chief Swan needs a hand on one of his a deputies. He was attacked last night, it seems. By an animal.”
You look at him with a question in your gaze.
“Animal?”
Carlisle smirks faintly, folding one of your dresses carefully—a beautiful golden gown with thin straps and a leg slit he’d appreciate.
“Yes, this time, an animal. Let’s hope it stays that way. I’m sure we’re all tired from the chaos of recent events. We could all use a break.”
You smile softly now, standing from the chaise and going to Carlisle as you also fold a dress; one of several laid out on the large bed.
“You’re right… I’m sure Edward and Bella would enjoy some time alone. I’m worried for them. All of them. And you… but you’re right, we need this as much as they do. Thank you for doing this, my dearest. I am grateful. But…”
You turn towards him after setting the folded dress in the suitcase, clasping your own cold hands on his angled cheeks to make him look at you.
He sighs softly, but doesn’t resist.
“I hope you will take this time to rest as well. You are just as important as them. This isn’t the first time we’ve dealt with… chaos.” You smile gently to sooth him, but the concern is clear in the gold of your own irises as you run a thumb on his cheekbone.
If he were human, the fatigue would be clear in the bags of his eyes and the slouch of his shoulders. But he is not one, which makes the exhaustion harder to see but nevertheless you notice it.
As always.
Carlisle steps close to you, broad shoulders filling the frame as his hands land on your waist and pull you close.
“Shhh…” He soothes, laying a comforting kiss on your forehead as he gently rubs your back once more.
You melt into the action, laying a cheek on his firm chest as your arms slide down and your palms cup his square shoulders.
“You are right, and I will not say otherwise. But this family is strong. We have survived far worse things and still, we stand. We live, we continue on because that is what we do.”
You sighed softly, nodding along.
“We know them well, and because of that we know they’ll handle themselves differently but… with each other. And we will help them, when they are ready to ask.”
Sigh… just wanted to get this out of my drafts fr. Fuck editing 😩😩😩
𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢. 𝐤. 𐙚₊˚⊹♡ restraint x indulgence. obsessed with this concept of restraint x indulgent especially with nanami. this is nothing crazy, just a small blurb.
“Oh, Nanami… have a bite~. A little cookie never hurt anyone…” you chuckled—a sound like velvet haunting cathedrals.
Enticing.
Indulgent.
Entirely inefficient.
Nanami sighed, a sharp, tired sound.
You waved a cookie in front of his eyes like a succubus beckoning sin, your nails sharp and blood-colored.
He adjusted his grip on his black pen and spoke plainly, “I am working.”
You merely chuckled once more, swiftly plucking the cookie away from his face and placing it back in the box.
“Must you be so boring? It is a cookie, Nanami. Not a bomb. Though…” you grinned, “that would be much more fun, wouldn’t it?”
Nanami spared you a glance, the assessing kind reserved for inefficiencies.
He paused, watching you lounge back in the seat across his desk.
You crossed your legs, fluffed your hair, and didn’t bother fixing the way your dress had slipped down your thigh—the epitome of queenly decadence and languor.
A beat passed between you before he lowered his gaze back to his work.
He had lingered too long.
Longer than necessary.
“Then I suggest you find your fun elsewhere,” he said, “preferably somewhere that doesn’t involve my time.”
You hummed, amused, “Well then that wouldn’t be fun for me, would it?”
You leaned over his desk then.
Close.
Enough to share secrets and the scent of your perfume.
Pomegranates.
Roses.
Distraction.
“Besides… you like it when I bother you, Nanami. That’s why you haven’t told me to leave.” You grinned, wicked and certain.
Your voice was low, coaxing, and deeply problematic to his workspace.
Nanami clenched his jaw briefly, an act of restraint rather than annoyance.
His eyes flicked up to look at you once more.
Too close.
Your dress. The neckline hung lower than it should have.
Inappropriate.
Your hair spilled loose down your shoulder.
Impractical.
He met your gaze evenly.
A mistake.
Your lashes were thick and framed the shadows of your irises, eyes that twinkled with something salacious and bright and entirely too aware.
Another beat passed before Nanami looked back down at his paper.
His fingers tensed around his pen but did not move.
You noticed.
“…What kind of cookies are they?” He indulged, monotone.
Yet not entirely unaffected.
You chuckled once again—the sound of a queen victorious, already reaching for the box.
frostlight symbolizes a love that is coldly beautiful on the surface but intensely emotional beneath. a resilient, enduring romance.
𝓅𝒶𝒾𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔: rosalie hale x cullen!fem!reader
𝓅.𝓈.: please enjoy & thanks for reading! xoxo
❝𝐎𝐇—𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐀 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖?❞ You grumbled irritably, still reeling from the tense conversation that had occurred just moments earlier.
You stood on the terrace of your bedroom with your arms crossed over your chest, sharp nails digging into your own skin, unnoticed.
You scowled at the moon overhead and the expanse of trees below. You heard the sounds of rustling critters on the ground and saw the faint, yellow dots of fireflies buzzing around in the air.
To anyone else it was the art of a most organic form; of nature and life combined for a moment of sacred harmony, fleeting as it was.
Especially with your ethereal, undead beauty compared to the forest’s heartbeat.
You merely scowled harder if possible, jerking your manicured hand up and shooing the fireflies away that dare glow too close, too bright, in your orbit.
In fact, you cursed them for being so beautiful at a time like this.
The moon, the trees, the noise, the peace; all a melodic cacophony stabbing at your fragile temper so late into the night.
Their lights flickered yellow and black before vanishing away.
You settled your hands on the railing.
Gripping too tight.
You were left alone with the cold moonlight, your thoughts, and the agonizing weight of such familiar frustration…
And it only sullied your mood further.
“Tch… I knew I’d find you out here…”
A soft voice spoke, then the slide of a door shutting in place.
You exhaled a tense breath through your nose, not looking behind you.
“Rose… don’t look at me like this, I’m a mess,” you mumbled, shaking your head slightly.
There was a heeled footstep on the deck, then a cold hand gently caressing the small of your back before drifting.
“…a beautiful mess, at least.”
You felt a smile pull at the corner of your lips as you turned your head to see Rosalie standing beside you.
Her arms were loosely folded—gray cardigan draped over her shoulders—with her elegant posture straight and firm even in the dwindling late hours mortals wilted beneath.
Her platinum hair, softly curled, framed her shoulders in a perfect side part.
She offered you a small, comforting smile.
Still tense beneath the warmth.
“Are you all right?” she asked.
Her voice was clear, soft, carried by the breeze.
You exhaled heavily, letting your muscles relax at the sound of her voice.
You nodded slightly, “yeah…”
A beat passed after that.
Rosalie stared at you with her golden eyes, piercing and aware.
Expectant.
You turned towards her fully and threw your arms up, “actually no!“
Her lips quirked in amusement.
Of course.
“I don’t understand why Bella would even think to put herself in a conversation that does not involve her—AT ALL—especially when that conversation is between Edward and me! Not Edward, Bella, AND I! I mean—“
Rosalie chuckled a little, leaning her hip on the railing and cocking her head at you.
She merely stared as you kept ranting for a couple minutes longer—yes, minutes—aware that their family downstairs could hear every word.
“-Edward was my brother FIRST before he was ever her LOVER-"
She licked her lip, hiding a growing smile.
“-and of course Edward took her side over MINE-"
Rosalie’s brow raised.
She’ll remember that.
“-but… I guess I was being…” you scowled, glaring at the treeline now, “…childish. Perhaps.”
You shrugged impetuously, waving a sharp-nailed hand in dismissal.
Rosalie let the moment settle before stepping closer to you, laying a perfect hand on the railing by your hip.
You smelled the floral champagne perfume she wore—an expensive scent curated for women like her.
Elegant, beautiful, warmth somehow burrowed beneath the frost.
It caused you to glance her way before looking back at the dark.
You were embarrassed.
“You are never childish. Bratty maybe…” she teased softly, rolling her eyes, “but not childish. You are right to feel annoyed. I do.”
You snapped your head, “you do?”
The concern in your voice was evident in the furrow of your brow and the look you gave her.
She sighed despite not needing breath, a delicate sound carrying frustration and understanding.
You moved closer, not too much, just enough to share intimacy.
“Tell me, Rose…” you spoke softer than you had all evening, your hand coming down to lay over hers on the railing.
Two cold, perfect pieces of diamond flesh with manicured nails and blatant affection interlocked beneath the moon.
Rosalie stared at your hands locked together with a tender look in her eyes.
It was brief, but honest.
“There is nothing to say… you said it for me. As always…” she answered, amused still, looking back up at you.
“Aw, so you were angry for me?” you grinned salaciously, gripping her hand tighter and leaning in.
Closer than before.
Close enough to tease a woman who didn’t get teased lightly.
Rosalie chuckled with you, leaning into your theatrics when you traced the ends of her hair.
Your open hand carefully smoothed a tangle that wasn’t there, twirling it around your nail as your teasing grin turned into something fond and lovelorn.
“And if I was?” Rosalie indulged, turning more towards you with a sharp smile on her pink lips—one that lusted for a reaction.
Your eyes flickered to her face where a firefly buzzed past. Orange and glowing against the ethereal pallor of her skin.
If anything, it made her eyes sparkle like a flame.
You bit your lip softly, briefly, hiding a chuckle when her hand turned over in yours to interlock them fully.
Her other hand landed on the slope of your waist, cold, ephemeral, meant to be there.
Not asking if she could.
It was a fragile space between you both now, dancing along a dangerously thin line where fire licked at the surface of something cold—and melting.
“Then I’d say…” you pondered, speaking quietly, “that you’re beautiful.”
You carefully settled her hair back on her shoulder, ensuring it was smooth, before putting your hand on her forearm.
The cardigan was soft, she was softer.
Warmer.
Colder.
Both.
Rosalie rolled her eyes slightly at the compliment, but it was more so languid and fond than irritated.
“You would say that.”
But she was smiling also.
A small one, a real one.
That correlation mattered.
You hummed, knowing, “Yes…” you smirked now, “because we have romance. Unlike some couples.”
It was a joke, but it made Rosalie chuckle enough to gratify you.
She licked her lips again when she met your gaze, cocking her head in that thoughtful way she always did.
But with the moonlight cast on the angles of her face in holy white and gray shadows, the beauty of such an angel burdened your heart in ways she never understood.
“It’s a beautiful night, hm? Too beautiful for anyone but us. Don’t you think?”
Rosalie’s eyes, gold and sharp, traced the view when she said it.
The trees, the moon, the sky, the dark.
Then you.
You watched as she did.
Her eyes. Sparkling, gold, yours to stare into.
Her skin. Pale, smooth, yours to caress.
Her lips. Pink, plush, yours to whisper secrets to.
Even your conjoined hands still together despite the closeness.
A loving smile graced your lips as you raised them and kissed her cold knuckles.
An inevitable, devoted act, like sailors drawn to siren song.
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synopsis: Ben Miller was a reckless man at times, always taking on more than he could chew just to prove himself more than he already has. After he got shot on a simple recon mission, and didn’t even acknowledge the possible consequence of his actions, you were sent into a tizzy. It wasn’t until you were taking a relaxing bath in the lake did Ben come to you to reconcile, taking you in the water to prove to you he’d never leave.
content includes: unprotected sex, sex in water, lake sex, dirty talk, pet names like baby, pretty girl, honey, sweetheart, some angst at the beginning and middle, aftercare-ish, make up sex, near death experiences, reader oblivious to the dangers of a random lake, fingering, titty play, nipple sucking + biting, p cumming in v, overstimulation
warnings: sexual content 18+, bad words and cussing, mentions of guns, bullets, gunshot wounds, and blood. a little inner turmoil too but who doesn’t love that.
authors note: honestly, I love me some Benny fr 😫 also, probably made this a lot more dramatic than it needed to be but oh well.
BENNY’S HEADY STARE BURNED INTO you from across the fire, heavy with guilt and glittering with the orange flame of mild annoyance. His strong jaw was clenched, dirt smeared on his cheeks and clothes, his hands in tight fists inside his hoodie pockets. He was angry with you for being angry with him, angry that you were making him feel guilty for what reason? He didn’t know, and that made him all the more irritated.
You could feel it, his blue eyes boring into your skin and washing over you like hot oil; it made your flesh prickle. You refused to acknowledge him though, sat next to Pope as the both of you leaned back on a tree stump. Your body ached but your heart was shattered, and you could do nothing but stare into the orange flames with a tense frown, your eyebrows furrowed and lips tight together as the heat warmed your nose and cheeks. The group of five was silent, basking in their own aches and pains, almost scared to say anything and break the tense silence that had comfortably settled over them like a weighted blanket.
It was quiet besides the sounds of a crackling fire and the buzzing of crickets; the occasional ruffle of the trees when a soft breeze would dance through them. Nothing really needed to be said between each other, at least not until the next day. Everyone was still recovering from recon gone terribly wrong; still tense and jumpy at every little sound that sparked around them. This was true, but you were oblivious to the real reason why no one wanted to speak quite yet, for it was clear that the tension brewing between you and your beloved had everyone on high alert, sharing uneasy glances between each other and fiddling with leaves and knifes to distract themselves from it.
The fire hissed out smoke and ash like it was regurgitating the effects of your own anger back at you; right in the middle of you and Benny as you couldn’t sit next to him like nothing was the matter. You stared into the flames intently, absentminded and irritated. The memory of earlier that day kept replaying in your mind like some shitty movie; and you were forced to sit there, a front row seat to the unraveling of your own sanity.
Benny, being cocky like he could be, walking out onto an open road with guards standing right at the gates, thinking his own mortality was just a mere suggestion, that he could just survive a flurry of bullets aimed at his head like his life was limitless. Thankfully, all he had gotten was a bullet in the forearm before Will was gunning the guards down to save his idiotic younger brother. You were thankful he was alright, that some mystical force orchestrating your lives had not cut all his strings just yet, that they let him spend just a little more time with you. But… you couldn’t even begin to describe the pain and panic in your chest when you saw Benny fall down to the gravel, like you had just been shot your self.
You saw the way the dark red pigment of his blood poured into the gravel like his very life force was swimming away from him, the way his face twisted in pain and the way he crumbled to the ground. It was like your whole existence and being had been frozen in time, your body going numb and your mind going blank as your whole life flashed before it like a taunting joke. Your heart stopped beating and your mouth went dry as all you could do was watch from your position in the tree line, your ear piece buzzing with four panicked voices at once like muddled chatter.
It was the worst feeling you had ever experienced, and ever since you couldn’t get rid of that sick feeling in your stomach that made goosebumps rise on your arms, or swallow away the dryness in the back of your throat.
Even then, even if you could’ve recovered from the incident, Benny himself couldn’t admit that what he did was wrong, especially not to you. He didn’t even acknowledge the fact that he could’ve died, left you all alone with nothing but the ghost of his memory. After he had patched up his arm, he bounced right back like nothing had gone wrong in the first place. He didn’t reassure you, hug and kiss you and make all your worries go away like he was supposed to. You weren’t sure he remembered you were even there, camouflaged in the brush way up in the trees, unable to leave your post and possibly ruin the mission even further. You were forced to wallow in your own terror, unable to speak and unable to breath, scope shaky from your trembling hands.
And then, and then, the boys found themselves laughing about it just a little while after, on the trek back to the campsite, once Ben was better and too riled up with adrenaline and excitement to consider your feelings. It was almost like they were mocking your worry from where you lingered behind them; you knew they weren’t but you couldn’t see it any other way. You didn’t find it funny, you didn’t even understand how Benny could just brush it off like he didn’t just almost ruin both your lives forever. How could he be smiling like he didn’t just stomp on your soul and rub it in the dirt? How could he be laughing like his own arrogance and stupidity was the funniest thing in the world?
You had been distant ever since, sitting in this one spot and avoiding anyone who tried to talk to you. Benny had even tried to, sensing your bad mood and wanting to fix it. But his concern had come far too late, and you didn’t feel like entertaining him and his ego. So you brushed him off just as he did you, giving him a curt just leave me alone that had his skin going cold like someone had poured a bucket of water over his head. The boys could sense your vexation as well, and even they weren’t sure what had soured your mood so much but they knew better than to pry. They gave you your space, even set your sleeping bag out for you when you isolated yourself at the bonfire with that steely frown on your face.
That had been four hours ago, in the orange glow of the sunset when even the sun couldn’t stand Benny’s indifference any longer. Now, it was late at night, stars twinkling in the dark sky and the full moon staring down at them, witness to your depression. The group was surrounded in darkness and trees only illuminated by the soft glow of the fire, tense and tired as their muscles melted down and their guards softened, sleep weighing down on their heavy eyelids. Gnats buzzed around the fire light and even buzzed past your ears, but you weren’t tired, just frozen.
Benny Miller had been in a confused slump over that time, gradually getting more and more frustrated the longer you refused to talk to him, or fuck, even look at him. There was nothing worse in this world to him than your sorrow, and usually he was the one coddling you and kissing your tears away, rocking you in his arms and protecting you from anything that could’ve hurt you. Shit, even when you were mad at him at least you acknowledged him, screamed at him, called him an inconsiderate asshole and anything else you’d say just to hurt him. But this, this he had never seen.
You weren’t yelling, staring at him with bloodshot eyes and red cheeks, rocking in his strong arms or crying on his shoulder. You were just there, a couple feet in front of him that felt like miles away, thinking about something that had you stressing yourself out and had you pissed off at him along with it. It was the not knowing that irritated him the most; you weren’t talking to him about it to try and fix it, just soaking in it like a hot bath until you were drowning in the idea of it, whatever it was. You weren’t letting him save you, comfort you, hold you and make it all better like you usually do. You were just a cruel statue, and he couldn’t stand it, racking his brain for what he could’ve possibly done in the span of five hours to have you hate him completely… and there was nothing. He had absolutely no clue, and it made him want to punch the ground and take his anger out on something.
But all he could do was stare and hope it bothered you enough to look at him, maybe even tell him to stop. But you were too enraptured in your own mind to give him the time of day, and it made him feel sad and angry and sick to his stomach that you were this mad at him. He felt guilt and regret bubbling in his gut for something he wasn’t sure he even did, and he wanted so badly to vomit out all the apologies and sorry’s you wanted to hear, anything to have you be with him again and make all these bad feelings disappear. But he had a sneaky suspicion that all of his inner turmoil was just some spiteful part of your punishment for him, a consequence you intended from the start.
His mind was just circling and circling, jumping from conclusion to conclusion, replaying the days events over and over and over like he’d find a missing clue to his crime the longer he searched. But it was nothing… nothing, nothing, nothing, and he couldn’t fucking stand it.
You could see the dark outline of Benny’s legs peeking through the flames, and you found yourself staring at his calf’s before you could stop yourself. You forced your eyes to not look further up despite wanting to, knowing it was best. You did love Benny, you loved him a lot, so much so that even if you were mad at him you still subconsciously yearned for him; it was a deeper part of your mind reserved solely for Ben Miller that had been programmed to love every bad part of him ever since you met him. It was sending shocks throughout your body and pulses in your brain, wanted so badly to look at his face, run your hands through his blonde hair and kiss his chapped lips. It made your skin feel cold without his arms around you, your lips tingle at the memory of connecting with his. And it was that love for him that always made you break so much sooner than you wanted to.
But not this time. This wasn’t one of your normal arguments when Benny would forget to text you, forget what you needed from the store, or eat all the food in the fridge without asking. This was life or death and he had just tiptoed his way into the latter, and you weren’t going to break this time, cry and hug and say you’re sorry. You needed space, you needed to think and try and gather some strength back so you could talk to Benny in the morning. You weren’t going to let this slip, let him off the hook like he didn’t almost die and then forget to tell you about it.
You were going to be strong and you were going to let him suffer just as you have suffered.
You turned your head to Pope who was sitting next to you, his legs outstretched in front him and his hands in his lap, fiddling with a stick like it was the most perplex thing in the world. He had some blood stained on his green cargo pants and gray t-shirt, and you couldn’t believe you didn’t notice it before. You swallowed at the sight of it, an anxious feeling sparking up in your chest like a flare until you managed to look up at Pope’s face instead.
“Hey, Pope?” You mumbled quietly, not wanting to speak too loud and scare away the calm.
Pope was almost startled by the sound of your gentle voice, lost in his own head as he thought over battle strategy as always. He turned to you, curious with what you had to say since you hadn’t spoken in quite some time.
He hummed in response, a soft look lurking in the shadow of his brown eyes as he looked at you, not wanting to set you off any further.
“You guys can go ahead and sleep, y’know. I’m gonna go down by the lake and try to wash all this dirt off me. I look a mess.” You gestured down to the dirt matted on your clothes with a small smile, trying to joke with him so he knew you weren’t angry with him or the other guys.
You had seen the lake when you had set up camp the day before, walking around the perimeter as a safety precaution. Right now it seemed like the perfect escape, away from Benny, away from the light, and away from the temptation. You could feel your resolve crumbling, the pull in your gut was taut like a rope wrapped around both your waists, begging you to get up and plop yourself in Benny’s lap like you always would. He was pulling you closer and closer with every long minute that dragged by whether he knew it or not, and you knew the longer you stayed around Benny the quicker it would fall, and you’d be right back in his arms like you were the who did something wrong. You couldn’t let that happen, you just couldn’t. If Benny wanted to talk to you he would have to come up to you, apologize to you for being the stupidest man on the planet and almost giving you a heart attack.
Until then, you just needed some alone time.
Pope nodded his head, eyes flickering around your face and the way you half-assed a smile. He could see the frazzled look in your eyes though, and despite not wanting anyone to drift off from the group he could see the faint desperation on your face; he knew you needed some space.
“Okay, that sounds good. Take a knife or something with you, just in case. And if something happens—“
“I know. I’ll scream as loud as I can like I’m not a trained military soldier with skills of her own.” You interrupted with a playful roll of your eyes, already pushing off the ground and standing up on your own two feet. You felt your limbs pop from being locked in for four hours straight; the stretch felt good on your sore thighs and arms. Everyone looked at you as you stood, disturbed by the noise. Even Frank, whose eyes had been closed under the rim of his cap, in a soft sleep against a tree, looked up at you, moving his hat out of the way.
Benny couldn’t help the hope that piqued in his heart, thinking this was finally the moment he was waiting for. He stared up at you, his eyes running over your frizzy hair, noting the dirt on your hands and neck but still an Angel bathed in the golden light to him. He was expecting a confrontation at least, or even a look cast his way that he would knew what it meant. But nothing, you just walked towards the tree line like he was nothing but a ghost in the forest, haunting the camp fire with his lamentation.
“Where do you think you’re goin’, young lady?” Frank asked in a playful stern tone, making you crack a small smile at him.
You turned your back to look at him, “I’m going for a swim. Don’t wait up.”
You turned back around and stepped over Pope’s legs, the sight of blood in your peripheral, heading in the direction of the lake with twigs and leaves crunching under your boots.
“Ay, be careful, hermana.” Frank pointed at you in warning, but you just waved a hand in the air in acknowledgment before putting them in your jacket pockets, walking further into the night and staring at the ground as you went, the frown back just as quick as it left.
Benny sank down once more, staring after you like a lost little puppy with some bite behind his bark. He grind his teeth with a small scoff at your behavior, looking away from your back as it disappeared into the darkness, away from the light and away from his eyesight. His chest felt sore like it had just been stomped on, taking heavy breaths to calm himself down as he settled back against a tree, taking a hand out of his pocket and adjusting his hat on his head like a comforting reflex.
Will shared a look with the other two, smacking a knife against his palm from where his elbows rest on his arched knees. They all wanted to say something but knew it was in their best interest not to, especially when it came to butting into Benny’s relationships like they knew better or something. At least, that’s how Benny always took it.
Will shared a knowing look with Pope and Frank, who got the message.
“We’re gonna head off to bed, alright guys? Don’t stay up too late. Remember we have to be up before Gomez if we want things going smoothly this time.” Pope, always the levelheaded leader, gave Benny and Will a pointed look once he got off the dirt, putting his hands in his pants pockets. His dark hair was dusty with dirt, blood from Bennys wound dried on his shirt and pants.
Benny just nodded his head once, not listening to a word.
Frank got off the ground as well, glancing at Benny sympathetically as he adjusted his cap on his head just as Benny did.
“That means no more shootouts, eh?” Frank grinned, making a jab at Benny as he slapped Pope on the shoulder with a light shove. Benny saw as he walked past Pope and to the direction of the sleeping bags just a few feet away, annoyed with the sound of laughter because all he wanted to do was sulk in his misery.
Pope chuckled at that, turning back to the pair of brothers.
“Besides that, it was good work today. We got a lot on shit on Gomez and tomorrow’s gonna be the day we get his ass. For real this time.”
“Yeah… I wouldn’t get your hopes up, Santi.” Will exhaled, looking up at Pope with a tired expression, bags under his eyes and blonde hair a ruffled mess. He slapped the blade against his palm once more, feeling pessimistic from the mishap that happened earlier today and not having much confidence in Popes plans for tomorrow. Shit never went according to plan with them, should’ve learned that from the last time.
Pope just nodded at that with an understanding expression, knowing that was a conversation best left unopened. He looked back up at Will, “Get some sleep. The both of you.”
He turned with a lingering look to Will, then glanced at Benny before fully turning around. He started towards the sleeping bags where Frank was already passed out with his hat over his eyes, giving Will and Ben the space they needed to have whatever discussion they needed to have, always unable to show vulnerability around anyone but themselves.
A few beats of silence passed besides the crackling of the dimming fire, Benny anticipating whatever advice Will obviously had for him. He wasn’t clueless, knew Pope and Frank only left so him and Will could have some sort of heart to heart and so that Will could share his perspicacious advice and wisdom. Honestly, Ben wasn’t even sure he wanted to hear it. There was no advice for a man who didn’t even know to use it, especially one it would hold no real value to. Besides, Benny really didn’t want hear his brothers advice on relationships.
Benny glanced at his brother, who just stared into the fire with a dull gaze.
“So what? Gonna give me some relationship advice now? You’re a little late, bud.” Benny grumbled with that southern accent of his you loved so much, the flames flickering in the cool warmth of his eyes as he leaned back against the bumpy tree trunk with a heavy sigh.
Will cracked a small smile at that, shaking his head as he looked to his left at his stone faced brother.
“Nah, man. Nothin’ I say is gonna make it any better.” Will mumbled, turning his head to look at the empty darkness in the trees where you had disappeared into, licking his chapped lips.
“But whatever you did, bro, she’s pissed. You gotta handle that.” Will exhaled, looking back at the side of Ben’s face where sweat had beaded alongside his hairline.
Benny side eyed his brother as Will patted his shoulder encouragingly, getting up with a tired grunt and putting the knife in his pocket.
Benny looked up at him, his skin hot from the fire and his heart beating steadily in his ears. He gave a stubborn shrug of his shoulder in response, an ache shooting down his left arm at the movement.
“She can be pissed all she want. I ain’t runnin’ after her every time there’s a stick up her ass.” Benny said stubbornly; but even he knew that was bullshit. Benny would follow you anywhere and has, for reasons less than this. He just couldn’t help but think you were being completely unreasonable about the whole situation; expecting him to chase you down like a dog, kneel at your feet and beg for your royal pardon and make him atone for his sins. But it pissed him off even more because he would, if that’s what it took to hear your voice again, to be able to look into your eyes again and feel your hands on his. He’d kiss your shoes and lick the dirt off of them in that’s what it took, beg for your hand and never stop spewing apologies. All you had to do was ask.
But no, you just treated him like he was the worst person you’d ever met, avoided him like he was a parasite leaching off your love and he couldn’t fucking stand it. He was more than that, you were more than that. Your anger chipped away at his pride like a brick hammer second by second, and he hated that sick feeling twisting in his gut that made him feel lightheaded.
And Will knew it just as much Benny did, which is why he couldn’t help but smirk knowingly at that, looking back at his brother with a cocky little smile that rubbed Ben the wrong way.
“Yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night.”
Ben stared at his brothers back as he walked away into the shadow, Will’s words lingering in his head because he knew his brother, especially him, wouldn’t believe Benny’s bull shit if he handed it to him.
Benny rolled his tongue on the inside of his cheek and clenched his jaw, looking back down at the fire as his neck tensed with irritation. He didn’t want to be the one to reconcile things, too stubborn and prideful and ignorant to his own error. He was still pissed at you for reasons unknown, one part of him frustrated with your silence but the other part aching to reach out to you despite his own bull-headedness. He hoped you’d appear from the tree line and curl up next to him with an apology on your lips, wrap your arms around him and lay your head on his shoulder and fix his broken world. But no, he knew that wouldn’t happen from his spot glued to the dirty ground, alone by the camp fire spitting out ash like it was yelling at him.
He knew what he had to do, just wished he hadn’t.
The lake was beautiful, bathed in the silver light of the moon with the stars reflecting in the black water like a kaleidoscope of gems. They stared back up at you, twinkling in your eyes and you couldn’t help but be in awe of it.
It was a large clearing inside the valley of a mountain, hidden away like it’s beauty was almost too much for Mother Earth to find. You couldn’t see how far back it went, only the black tree line that blurred with the edge of the water quite a ways away from the shoreline you stood at. The water was calm and still, so different from your racing heart and shaky hands. It was cooler here, cooler in the dark as the gentle breeze swept through your cheeks and tingled your neck.
The air smelt of lavender and dirt, earthy and natural, and you inhaled a big breath through your nose as the scent calmed you. Purple flowers littered the shoreline, tall and vibrant with stones hidden along the outskirts. You could hear the buzz of crickets in the tall grass, see the bright yellow dots floating along the air like the fireflies were beckoning you into the water.
It had been beautiful when you discovered it a day prior, when the sun was shining down on the blue water and the trees reflected in the horizon, birds dancing in the sky. But, here, now, nightfall was a whole different experience entirely. You felt like you had been pulled straight into movie with the way a light sheet of mist covered the ground and overlapped your boots, cascading along the surface of the lake.
You sighed happily, a smile making its way onto your face as you realized this was exactly what you had needed. The stress in your body began to fade as your skin thrummed, eager to finally go in the water and feel it’s soothing waves wash over you, wash over your mind and clear the muddled thoughts of Ben Miller from the crevices of your brain. He haunted your thoughts too often, had burrowed himself inside your heart and mind like a virus.
Your skin felt itchy and hot from the humidity of the forest as you quietly walked to the edge of the water, not even a soft wave crashing into your boots as you stared down at your murky reflection through the mist, the croak of frog sounding from somewhere around you.
Your hair was frizzy, tied back in a loose bun that morning that had fallen apart during the day, dirt and sweat smeared across your cheeks and neck and your lips cracked and dry. Your eyes were dull and your lips were pulled into a frown, a faint scratch on your collarbone from when a branch had nipped you. You were only joking when you said it, but you looked a mess.
You frowned even harder at that, disappointed with your appearance and how manic you looked, all because of a person who had all this power over you without even knowing.
You took a step back at the thought, not seeing the point in wasting anymore time as you managed to find a seat on a rock and slip off your combat boots. Your body was sore for some reason, and upon taking off your socks and standing up to take off your thick black pants, you noticed the faint yellow color of bruises dusted along your thighs and knees. You knew they had to have been from you being stationed on a tree top for hours, staring out your scope with it pointed right at Gomez, just in case he did anything you didn’t like; having to stay perfectly still.
Gomez, yet another crime boss in the middle of a lawless jungle terrorizing innocent people. You and your team had been tracking him for a while, even had one failed bust way back when. But tomorrow, tomorrow you were going to finally take him down after a long three day reconnaissance mission. But now, now you were here, standing in front of this beautiful lake with your clothes in a pile next to you. You didn’t have the time to think about tomorrow because then you couldn’t focus on the now.
The soft wind felt so good on your bare skin, running through your hair you had let down and caressing your flesh with a gentle hand. For the first time that day you felt content, bathed in the glow of the moonlight as it shined down on your naked form, littered with dirt and cuts and sweat.
You tried hard to push Benny into the back of your mind as you took gentle steps towards the water, leaving your negative thoughts in the dirt. As you reached the shoreline, skin dotted with goosebumps, you tentatively dipping your foot in as a chill swept through your skin at the cold sensation. The cold against the hotness of your skin felt like a much needed smack to your nervous system.
You took a calming breath, ignoring the sting of the cold water as you walked further into the black lagoon, your legs and thighs and hips being enveloped by the mist and welcomed in by the still waters, until you were waist deep and your toes were digging into the gray sand underneath the water. A shiver prickled your sweaty skin as a tickling sensation ran up your spine.
You felt weightless, floating in air as your muscles relaxed like melting candle wax, the water swishing around your arms in soft waves as you softly moved them around you, feeling the lightness slip through your fingers. You closed your eyes, basking in the coolness of the water as a peaceful silence buzzed in your ears. The breeze ran through you and chilled you to the bone, but the cold felt nice against your buzzing skin, gave you something to think about other than Benny.
You walked a little further in until the tops of your breasts were floating in the water, the anxiety you had melting away as you dipped your head back in the water, letting the droplets slide down your forehead as you lifted your head back up. You couldn’t help another shiver as the water poured down your back and shoulders, trickling back into the lake. You felt cleaner already, could almost feel the sweat and dirt on your skin evaporating as the memory of that day washed away into the lake.
However, as you stared at the water around you, you couldn’t help the longing that pulled at your heart at the thought of sharing this experience with the one person you wanted so badly; have his strong arms wrapped around as you splashed in the water, stare at the moon nestled between two mountain peaks with your head on his shoulder and love swelling in your chests.
You could feel yourself frowning again at the thought, your eyes beginning to blur with tears as your emotions finally overwhelmed you. The thought of him dying, actually leaving you alone, ash in a vase… it had your stomach in knots as hot tears starting running down your cheeks.
You brought a hand out of the water and wiped away the tears falling, the droplets splattering into the water with the action. You couldn’t help but feel silly for crying over something that didn’t happen, but you couldn’t even fathom the thought of Benny dying, and all the stress from that day had finally dawned on you in the moment you had no more distractions from it. Your chest burned and your nose was starting to become sniffly, lips trembling as you brought a hand to your mouth to muffle the sob that shook your shoulders.
You closed your eyes and tried to take a calming breath, eyelashes wet against your cheeks as you felt tears slipping down your neck. You loved him so much, put his life higher than yours and cherished him more than he knew. But he was so fucking reckless, always trying to one-up Will or prove himself to his friends like he needed to prove to them he belonged. Even in those underground fights of his you’d always be anxious when he’d come back home with a broken nose or busted lip, standing on the sidelines and flinching every time he got knocked down. His pain brought you pain, and you just wished he’d realize that, take precautions, just be fucking careful.
You sniffled some more as your tears died down, hugging yourself as you opened your eyes again and stared at the moon, praying to whoever was up there they could watch over your boy, please please please let him be okay.
You felt the water moving behind you all of sudden, your body stiffening in high alert as the small waves smacked into your back. You turned your head ever so slightly, listening for anything.
Then, you heard the deep breath of someone a couple feet behind you, exhaustive and oh so familiar. Your chest almost burst, stomach falling at the realization of who it was.
“Can you look at me, please?”
Your eyes widened at the soft voice of Ben Miller behind you, gentle like he was trying not to scare away a baby deer, but still scratchy from his deep voice and accent. You couldn’t believe he had followed you out here, cornered you in the water like you were one of his boxing mates, leaving you no where to go but to him.
Your eyes flickered around the water like the waves held the answers you seek, hoping they’d pull you under the surface and bury you in the ground until you were hidden from his sight completely.
You sniffled as quietly as you could, subtly wiping away the last of your tears to gain your composure back, thankful the lake made it look like water cascading down your cheeks. You didn’t want Ben to know you’d been crying, knowing it would only make him feel bad and make him less prone to take you seriously.
You angled your head so he could hear you clearly, but you didn’t dare turn around even if your heart beat faster at hearing his so close behind.
“Please just go away, Benny. I don’t wanna talk to you right now.” You said quietly into the air, knowing your voice would crack if you spoke any louder. The buzzing of crickets chirped around you, the light fog slowly moving past your shoulders. You could feel your eyes stinging again at the presence of him, your arms wrapped around your chest to comfort yourself as another breeze had your skin prickling. You tried hard not to cry, a lump in your throat that you couldn’t swallow away.
Benny clenched his jaw at that, not wanting to lose his temper with you as the sweet sound of your voice he’d barely heard all day washed over him and made his skin tingle. He was only a few feet from you, staring into your wet hair despite wanting to come closer, not wanting you to run away from him like you did the last time he approached you. The water was cold, up to his stomach from the height difference between you, but if this is what it was going to take to get your attention.
His heart fluttered for you, yearned to wrap around you, his stomach in knots at the sound of your scratchy voice. He knew that voice, knew it all too well and knew you better than you thought. His hands itched to bring you into his chest, wrap his arms around you and shield you from the cold, surround you in his love and concern and finally let himself breath again. His lungs felt muffled, like water was clogging his chest and filling in the space there.
He clenched his hand, itching to touch you.
“Will you just stop that shit, already? Why are you crying?” Benny had to stop himself from scoffing at that; fuck no he wasn’t going to leave. He took a small step forward, furrowing his brows at you as the cool air chilled his bare skin.
You clenched your jaw, feeling that tense feeling in your bones as you suddenly felt too overwhelmed at the situation. You planned for this conversation in the morning, not right now in the middle of the night, in the middle of a lake, in the middle of no where.
“I wasn’t crying.” You sniffled again, tone firmer, but even you heard the crack in your voice that couldn’t convince anybody that that was the truth. You stared at the water, the weightless, joyous feeling you experienced earlier replaced with a dull sorrow… it made the water feel bland and the buzz under your skin turn to fuel for your annoyance. But… you couldn’t help but feel a little satisfaction at the fact Benny had actually managed to approach you. Usually, you were the one having to initiate things, so this was a surprising reprieve.
Benny knew that was an obvious lie, fist clenched as the urge to walk up to you had his arms twitching.
“Come on, don’t lie to me. Can you just turn around, please? I’m fucking begging you here…” Benny sounded borderline desperate, still keeping his voice low as he stared at you in desperation, heart jumping when he saw the slightest movement from you. He really couldn’t fucking stand this, teetering on the edge of confusion and unfamiliarity. He didn’t know what to say, what to do, how to make you feel better. He felt useless and horrible, just standing there while you obviously cried.
You swallowed thickly, eyes closing in consideration of his plea as another tear managed to fall down your cheek. Benny always knew how to get to you, he really did. It pained you to hear him be so distraught, that your body instinctively tired to turn around and run to him, kiss his cheek and meld into his chest like a vine growing from a root.
You opened your eyes, bright from the moon, then tentatively turned around in the water with your arms crossed over your chest. He couldn’t really see anything anyways. The sound of the water swishing around you sounded dreamy, if only it wasn’t given during the situation.
Benny’s eyes were stuck to you, frantically running over all the skin he could see to make sure you were alright. Your hair was slick down your back, water falling from your shoulders and cascading down the smoothness of your skin. You’re eyes were pink and veiny, cheeks puffy and lips a darker red. He frowned at the idea of you crying, almost reaching out to you but catching himself.
He sighed heavily, “oh, honey…”
You gazed up at him, eyes running over his bare chest, chiseled with muscle and the occasional scar, then to his strong jaw and greasy blonde hair messily slicked back on his head. Your eyes had lingered on the white bandage wrapped his left forearm from the where bullet had shattered his skin there, and you felt your stomach jump and legs go weak. Benjamin looked at you like you were fragile glass, eyes dark and worrying, brows furrowed and lips downturned. The moonlight shined down on him like he was a diamond, bright and tantalizing, and you hated how gorgeous he looked when you were still a little pissed at him.
At the sound of his pitiful voice you felt your eyes burn again, lips frowning as you tried hard not to cry at the very sight of him and that stupid wound, another wave of sadness crashing through you as your chest swelled up and your eyes went blurry. You missed him, had missed his touch, missed his voice, missed his slicked back hair. You couldn’t imagine feeling like this for the rest of your life, which was almost a very real reality.
It was almost like a dam had broke within you as your emotions crashed through you once again, your hand flying to your mouth as a sob wracked through your body and tears rushed down your cheeks.
Benny felt his own flood of emotions as he quickly went towards you, water splashing around you both as he scooped you into his arms and held you tight against him, one hand on the back of your head and the other on your back. He felt your tears run down his chest as you wrapped your arms around his waist and burrowed your head into his heart, the warmth of him comforting the entirety of you. You held onto him tight as he murmured words of comfort into your hair, hand rubbing the expanse of your back soothingly.
“Shh, sweetheart, shh. It’s okay, baby. Just breathe for me…” His deep voice rumbled against you, a low and comforting thrum that managed to calm your hiccuping breaths, the sound of his beating heart and the vibration of his voice against you like medicine for your soul.
You took slow deep breaths in, adjusting your head so your cheek laid on his chest and you could feel the cool breeze on your warm face. Your eyes were still closed, sore from crying as you sniffled some more. You tightened your hold around Benny, unable to stop yourself from acting out on the giddy feelings he gave you, like his bear hugs alone made flowers blossom in your chest and made your lungs feel like they would burst into daisies.
Benny squeezed you back despite the sharp ache in his arm, laying his chin on your head as he felt your breaths stop shuddering, whispering the occasional shh as he resumed rubbing the skin on your back like he was petting velvet. He felt sick to his stomach that you were in so much distress, heart beating quickly as worry kept pumping out of every artery.
He didn’t want to confront you yet; not even giving a damn to if you were in this much pain about it. He just held you and you let him, feeling refreshed and warm and like you were coming back home after a long vacation from it.
The water trickled around you melodically, and the sound of it felt nice against your pounding ears. A few beats of comforting silence passed as bugs chirped and wind whistled before you found your voice again.
“Please don’t die…”
Benny heard your scratchy voice croak out something tiredly, your breath hitting his tan skin. He furrowed his eyebrows, looking down at you.
“What’chu say, baby?” He asked, feeling yourself curl into him tighter than you were before, snuggling your head into his chest. He let you, arms still tight around you.
You sniffled some more, opening your eyes and staring out at the water as words just left your mouth before you could think.
“Earlier today… you got shot. You could’ve died and you didn’t even care and what was I supposed to do—“
Benny could feel your shoulders start to shake again, feeling more confused than ever as he interrupted your oncoming sobs, shhing you and rubbing your back some more just as you liked.
“Hey, it’s okay, honey. It’s alright now, shhh.” He had a confused look on his face as he thought about your words; thinking about earlier when he got shot, thinking about how you started acting funny after that, thinking about how much of a god damn idiot he was for not realizing it before. He clenched his jaw and shook his head at himself, holding you tighter against him like you’d fall out from under him if he didn’t. He was so fucking stupid, his chest wringing in pain at the thought of what he had done.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry, baby… you know that ain’t never gonna happen.” He mumbled, voice thick with remorse.
You cried softly a little while longer, until your throat ached and your eyes swelled. You took a hand and shakily wiped away your snot and tears, almost humiliated with yourself that this interaction had gone exactly like you didn’t want it to.
You found yourself calming down again though, really this time, as you picked your head up from under Benny and took your arms out from around him. Your bare breasts were smushed up against him, but this wasn’t a situation where either one of you needed to acknowledge it, far worse things lingering on both your minds.
Benny let you separate from him, his arms dropping down to your waist as he stared down at you curiously. He felt terrible for what had happened, knowing now why you acted the way you did. At times, Benny forgets his life is just as meaningful to other people like it was to him, forgets that he has someone who cares for his well-being and someone who loves him fully. He wasn’t used to being the priority all the time, hence he always carried this reckless attitude with him because if he died, at least it was only him who would. He didn’t even think about seeing if you were okay after it happened, assuming he was okay and that meant you were too. He felt like he had just crushed the world in his hands on behalf of your pain, genuine guilt swirling in his tummy as his sad eyes ran over your tear-ridden face.
You sniffled some more as you leaned back to look at him, your eyes flickering to his arm at the bandage he wasn’t supposed to get wet. You felt lighter again after crying it all out, like the blanket had been pulled off you and you were ready to get out of bed. You knew he felt guilty, seeing it dawn on his eyes as he looked you, felt in his hands glued to your waist like the water was going to carry you away.
You took your hands out of the water and brought them up to cradle Benny’s face, the water sliding down his neck and chest and making his skin shudder from the coolness of it.
“You were stupid. You could’ve died, thank god you didn’t but what if you had? I would be alone, you would’ve left me alone. I can’t be without you. You can’t ever die on me, Benjamin, I mean it.” Your voice was soft with urgency, staring into his eyes and making him look down at you as you spoke. He could hear the pain behind every word and closed his eyes to calm himself down, wanting to hug you again and soak up all your pain for himself if he held you tight enough. He hung onto your every word, taking a small step closer to you as the consequence of what’d he done stared into his face.
“You have to be more careful, even if you think you don’t have to be. You have to be careful for yourself, for me, for us, for the guys. You have no idea how scary it was seeing you fall to the ground like that and not being able to run over and make sure you were okay. I felt like… I felt like the whole world had just caved in on me and-and… just don’t ever do that shit again, okay?” You gently squeezed his cheeks for emphasis, your voice raw from all the crying you’d done. You looked deep into his eyes, flickering between the two, before you felt his hands come out of the water and cradle your face, his hands much bigger on your cheeks that they covered your jaw.
He brought himself to you, your hands slipping down to his chest as he looked down at you with a somber expression.
“Hey, hey, you listen to me. I will never leave you, woman. I’ll always come back to you, when have I never? Don’t you know after 2 years that you got me already? I couldn’t die if I wanted, you fucking own me. If I died and left that behind I’d be the stupidest motherfucker I’ve ever met.” His accent bled into your skin like sweet honey, thick with emotion but still trying to make you smile for him. You could hear the earnestness in his soft tone as he stared down at you with those fierce blue eyes of his, bright and dark and full of love.
You felt relief at his words, melting against him with tired limbs. You were glad you had gotten that off your chest, feeling reassured. Benny got even closer to you, his head just above yours that you had to look up at him to see him.
“I’m sorry, baby. You know that, right? I love you. Man, I love you so fucking much…” He rasped out, gently squeezing your cheeks underneath his warm palms as he spoke, his hot breath hitting your nose as you felt your heart flutter like a petal in the breeze; happy and weightless, bound by nothing but love and direction.
You felt another tear fall down your cheek, a small smile stretching across your pink lips as you picked your hands up and wrapped them around Benny’s neck, bringing him down until his forehead touched yours. You couldn’t describe the happiness you felt at that, his big hands sliding down your wet skin to wrap around your waist again, pressing you against his naked body with ease.
“I love you, too. I’m sorry for being such a bitch.” You laughed gently, the sound twinkling in Benny’s ears as a smile cracked on his own lips.
He had his eyes closed against you, nose bumping yours as the feel of your warmth surrounded him. He could feel a familiar spark stirring in his belly as you breathed against him, bare chest against his and your arms around his neck.
“I love you…” He murmured huskily, giving your nose a small peck, then your cheek, until his head was resting in the crook of your neck, rocking you against him slowly as the pair of you stood in the lake in a romantic embrace.
You couldn’t help but smile widely at that, wrapping your arms around his neck tighter until you were so close to him neither one of you could tell where his heart started and yours ended, interlocked as one.
It was silent for a while besides the sounds of nature and trees around you, the water still once more as neither one of you wanted to move away, content in each others arms, skin on skin and heart to heart as your face was laid on his broad shoulder, eyes closed as you pet the nape of his neck.
Feeling him against you after so long without him felt bizarre and needed, your nerves on high alert as your skin purred. You felt happy again after a long day of not feeling anything, and you couldn’t be more grateful that Benny was here with you, in your arms and holding you like you did him. Of course, there was always that possibility that one day he wouldn’t be, but for now you were satisfied with what you had, happy with the outcome of the now as you stroked the back of his neck and latched onto him. The combination of his breath against your cold neck and his fingertips doodling on the small of your back had your body tingling pleasurably, both of you sensing the heavy shift in the air.
You squeezed Benny a little harder, breasts pressing into him as your lips brushed against his neck, his hands digging into your flesh as he inhaled heavily. You felt electricity spark in the air as the two of started to get antsy, hands itching to explore more of each others skin and feel the energy thrive under your fingertips.
His hands squeezed your hips under the water as you slowly moved your hand down to his shoulder, igniting a trail of goosebumps that sent a pleasurable spark straight down to Benny’s cock. He swallowed thickly, breathing heavier against you in soft pants.
You both could feel the excited thrumming of your hearts in your chests, hands eager to touch as they moved from your hips to your waist, from his neck to his shoulders. The air felt hot and humid as you breathed each others air, skin buzzing and tingling with unforeseen desire.
Benny gulped, licking his lips as he wrapped his arms around you, lifting you out off the water slightly as he pressed his lips into your ear. You inhaled sharply at the sensation, burrowing your cheek into his as he spoke, your breath just has heavy his as it brushed past his ear.
“You want it?” He breathed against you hot and heavy, the feel of his semi-hard cock rocking into your hip as your pussy tightened around nothing, slick with want underneath the water and begging to be filled by him already.
Your hands explored his chest and arms hungrily, nodding your head with a simple, “mm-hmm.” Unable to speak words as the thought of his hard body against yours had your mind fogging with salacious need.
He clenched his jaw at that, sliding his arms down your body until they slipped under the water, gripping your thighs and easily wrapping them around his narrow waist. You tightened your legs around him, a hand coming up to clench onto his hair as he brought a hand up to lay flat against your stomach. The water splashed around you at the motion, but Benny didn’t care about the cold droplets splashing onto his warm skin as he brought his lips to your ear again.
You bit your lip, eyes closed in ecstasy from his skin on yours alone, your bare pussy rubbing up against his happy trail just beneath his belly button, his cock running up against your inner thigh, taunting your wet hole like it knew it belonged there. You could feel yourself clenching around nothing, your thighs tense as your clit throbbed almost painfully, sending distress signals to the rest of your sensitive body.
“You want my cock inside you, baby? Hmm?” He rubbed his nose on your neck, hand sliding up your stomach until it was grabbing your right tit, pushing it and massaging it like it was cookie dough in his big hand. He always loved playing with your tits, mesmerized by the softness of it.
You gasped softly at the sensation, your body highly sensitive as your lower regions basically ached for him, your clit pulsing as it rubbed against his stomach with every little movement. You instinctively took your hand out from around his neck, your hand sliding to cover his much bigger one that molded your right breast, encouraging him to squeeze it harder as pleasure jolted through your stomach at the sting of it.
Benny loved the weight of your breast in his hand, picking his head up and looking at your face right next to his. You had your eyes closed and lips parted slightly, gripping onto him like he was your lifeline. He felt hot and needy, feeling your pussy lips rub right above his thick cock, your legs tight around him as you clenched around nothing, craving him just as much as he craved you.
“Feel good, sweetheart?” He rasped out with that fucking accent of his, eyes heavy with want as he breathed hotly against your cheek, watching for every little movement of pleasure that crossed your face and enjoying being the cause of it. You let out another small whimper, and he felt it run through his skin like a current. He always got off on the pleasure he gave you, and the fact that he was barely doing anything to you yet just showed how needy you were for him, just as he was for you.
You dumbly nodded your head, lost in the feeling of him as you held on tightly to the back of his hand, almost guiding the motion of it as he rubbed your breast in circles.
“Hold on a sec…” He muttered huskily, putting his hand back down to hold your thigh against him. You could’ve pouted at the loss of him, stuck in a daze already, feeling the water swish around you as he turned his body around with you attached to it, walking forward until you felt a hard, cold sensation dig into the expanse of your back.
Your eyes opened groggily as you breathed heavily, tightening your thighs around Ben’s waist and pushing his cock harder against you in desperation.
You could only assume he had leveraged you between himself and one of the rocks along the water, feeling the wet cold of it poking into your skin and making you shiver. Your arms ran over his broad chest, water sliding down his skin and back into its origin as you leaned back against the rock to look at him fully, staring up at him with those pretty eyes that were practically begging him to do something to you.
He was big and tall, all muscle and man as he looked down at you with hungry blue eyes and a heaving chest, cast in the moons shadow as water softly dropped from the ends of his blonde hair onto his shoulders. The silver mist circled around you both as the wind whistled between you, the trees rustling above you. He was so handsome and pretty, so everything and most definitely all yours. You could feel another jolt of excitement shoot through your nerves like a wildfire at the sight of him, tracing your fingertips against his warm skin.
Benny looked down at your provocative eyes, dark with lust as your thighs pushed him further into you like a magnet to its match, his hands going above your head and trapping you between his forearms as he braced himself on the rock and leaned down towards you, smelling grass and lavender on your skin.
Your hands slid up to his shoulders as you were shroud in the darkness of his shadow, his head covering the view of the moon as he leaned down towards you with a predatory gaze.
“You love me?” He said against your lips when your eyes began to close at the erotica of it all, eager to feel his lips on you, his tongue on yours, his thick cock buried deep inside you. Your pussy couldn’t help but want the same thing, throbbing almost sufferingly in longing for the stretch of him. You almost whined against him at the feeling, frustrated and desperate to feel something, your impatience always such a nuisance.
“You know I do, Benny…” You whispered back as he stared down at your mouth when you spoke, your hands gliding up to his shoulders as he licked his lips.
He felt satisfaction tingle down his spine at the want in your voice, cracked and needy just as he liked it. Your hands gripped at him as your thighs squeezed around his hips, trying to push him harder against you. He brought a hand down from the rock, wrapping it around your jaw and forcing you to look up at him.
You didn’t fight it, enjoying his dominance a little more than you’d admit, feeling any fight you might’ve had in you dwindle into nothing as you looked up at him with slanted eyes and parted lips, bewitching him even further as he glanced down at your parted mouth.
“You my girl?” He hummed against you, his hooded eyes looking over your face as he made you look at him, fingers digging into your cheeks. His voice was low and gravelly with a dash of a southerners charm, making your pussy pulse fervently for something, anything. Benny’s accent always had this hold over you, especially when he sounded like that. Your skin crawled with arousal, nodding your head once more to appease him as the need to satisfy him overcame your need for words.
He smirked at that, taking a step closer to you as he finally leaned down and pressed his lips against yours, adjusting your head for you and turning it upwards towards him. You couldn’t help but moan into his mouth as your eyes closed, your hands flying up to his hair and pulling at the golden strands. You could feel your heart pounding in your chest, knowing his was too.
He groaned hotly into your mouth at the sharp sting in his head. sucking your tongue between his lips as you let out another whimper. He took his hand off from your jaw and slid it down your body, his rough hand grazing over your perked nipple and making you jolt against him. You felt him smile a little at that, his hand continuing down but making sure to feel every pore and inch of your skin as it did.
You found yourself following his lips when he would move a little too far back for your liking, your hands pushing his head down into yours as you breathed in his air, his mouth hot and wet against yours as your tongue played with his, not caring for decorum as you moaned against him once more. The kiss was messy and hot, all swollen lips and tongue like they’d been separated for a millennia, reacquainting with one an other as a small trail of spit slid down your chin. Benny and you both liked it that way, aroused by the depravity of it all.
He slid his hand under the water, his knuckles grazing your inner thigh as his fingers eagerly found the space between your thighs, your lips slick and smooth as he pushed two of his fingers through until they were enveloped in the warm slick of you, moving in and out of your hole as you stuttered against his lips with a shaky gasp. He wished he could hear that familiar squelch he would if you were on his bed, legs spread and soaking his sheets.
For now, this would have to do as the water smacked around his moving arm, your head thrown back against the hardness of the rock from the much needed intrusion as you cried into the air louder than necessary. Your nails scratched down to his shoulders, toes curling behind his back as your body arched up into him. Your body felt weightless and heavy all at once, stuck between a rock and a hard place as you gasped for air, the drawl of his long fingers inside of your most sensitive place sending pleasurable sparks throughout your body.
Benny didn’t stop to stare at you like he usually would, too pent up and horny that he just kept moving his lips down to your wet neck when you separated form him, tasting salt as he licked the droplets off your skin. He wanted no space between the two of you, wanted you against him and wanted to taste your skin, gone far too long without that luxury. As he fucked his fingers into you, knowing you could really only fit two, he felt your soft walls clamp around his knuckles as he stroked every ridge he felt with his fingertips, memorizing each one he counted as he sucked into your skin.
“Oh, fuck… Benny…” You whined as he took his other hand and gripped your breast, licking down your collarbone and arching down, putting your hard nipple into his warm mouth and licking it with his tongue. One hand was on the rock as the other was in his hair again, holding his head against your tit as he sucked on it, his eyes closed as he massaged the piece of skin where his mouth didn’t reach. He moaned against it, loving the taste of you against him, his teeth nibbling into your areola as you gasped at the sting of it.
His fingers stayed as deep as they could go inside of you, never quite pulling out before Benny would thrust them back in, pushing into your upper wall and pressing down on that one spot that had your limbs stiffening and your eyes welling up with tears. You felt so good, feeling your whole body light up like a firefly from the pleasure he gave you, ringing through your body and pulsing at your core. It almost hurt feeling so good, the small groans Ben let out as he sucked on your nipple doing nothing but making it worse for you.
You couldn’t stop the moans that rang out from your mouth, shrill and never ending because of the overstimulation of pleasure Benny was giving you, from your sore nipple his hot tongue played with to your throbbing pussy gradually reaching its climax. It was a wonderful combination you hadn’t expected to ruin you so quickly. But there you were, whining like a bitch as your hands clutched his hair, eliciting another deep groan from Benny that had your whole right side shaking with painful elation.
You felt his rough fingers slide in and out of you, coaxing you to cum as your toes curled behind his back and your eyes blurred with tears. Your pelvis felt so tight, bunched up in a knot the longer Benny stroked your insides like he was writing a message on your walls only he would know.
“Ohhh, Benny… feels so good, please, please, please… aghhhh…” You gasped out as your stomach tightened even more, his fingers moving quicker inside you in response to your high pitched pleas. He could feel his own pleasure from you stirring his cock even harder, the sound of your moans and breathy gasps making his spine tingle and his balls tighten. He just wished he had you in his bed, where he could see your cream ring around his fingers and cock as they slammed into your gaping hole over and over and over until you begged him to slow down.
He picked his head back up from your bruised nipple, bringing his lips to your ear in a hot whisper, “Come on, baby, cum for me. Cum on my fingers, pretty girl, come on…”
Just as soon as he said that you felt that knot in your stomach snap like a cord, your mouth flying open in a silent scream as your eyes closed, thighs tensing as wetness gushed out of your hole and all over his hand, blending into the water around you.
You breathed heavily from the throbbing in your lower half, your muscles melting against Benny like warm syrup. He kissed your cheek softly, lovingly, giving you a minute to calm down from your high as he gently pulled his fingers out from you and brought his hand to your side, massaging the skin there. He cuddled his head into your neck, his chest against yours as a nice breeze blew around you; it felt refreshing against your hot skin as your vagina throbbed and your thighs trembled in the after shock of your orgasm.
You loosely wrapped your arms around Ben as you breathed heavily, your heart pounding in your ears. You enjoyed having him against you, comforted by his closeness instead of overwhelmed by it, holding him close as you caught your breath. Your cheeks were hot and your thighs tense still, but you could still feel Benny’s hard dick poking into you under the water, and you wished so badly to see it like you had many times before, see the pink head swollen with need as precum beaded out of the tip, then you’d lick it up as it drizzled down to his heavy balls. You felt another wave of arousal quickly stir in your tummy again at the imagery, tightening your hold on him.
“You okay, honey? You ready for me now?” He spoke softly into your ear, caressing your sides as he waited for your consent. He was so painfully hard; seeing you get so riled up was always all he needed.
Your throat was dry as you swallowed, thighs tightening around him to beckon him forward. He didn’t fight it, falling right into you and clenching his jaw at the feeling of your pussy rubbing up against the base of his strong cock.
“Just fuck me already…” You mewled, wet and clenching all over again at the muscle memory of how good he felt inside you.
Benny didn’t even answer, reaching down and grabbing himself from under the water. He was hot and heavy in his hand, guiding himself to your entrance and pushing past the stickiness of your folds. He clenched his jaw and groaned at the feeling of his tip prodding at your tight entrance, eager to push in and slam into your warmth, give you both what you’ve been yearning for.
You gripped his shoulders as you felt his thickness push into you, a sharp cry ringing out at the stretch of him. Benny bit into your neck, muscles flexing as he picked his arm back up from the water once he was inside you, moaning quietly at the feel of your tight wet walls squeezing around him.
“Fuck…” He groaned into your skin, pulling back out despite your walls squeezing him in, then sliding back inside as an attempt to loosen you up a little more for him.
“Oh my god…” You breathed out wistfully, tremors of indescribable pleasure coursing through you at the feel of his cock moving inside of you, back and forth inside of your tight hole that cried for him. You stared into the sky absentmindedly, unable to breath as he rocked a little harder inside you, one hand next to your head to stabilize himself against the rock and the other gripping your forearm as he hid his head inside your neck, panting against you.
He soon developed a rhythm, the water smacking into your skin as his hips went back and forth, his cock bullying it’s way inside your dripping cunt as he mumbled obscenities into your ear. He was lost in his own pleasure, slamming into your soaked pussy as his balls slapped against your ass.
“Fuck, baby. I’d never leave you… could never leave this good pussy…” He grunted into your ear, his lips brushing against it as you basically sobbed from the intensity of his girth slamming in and out of your hungry pussy. Your arms clutched around him as you jolted against the rock from the force of his hips slamming into you, moans cracked from every movement that had your lungs shaking.
You moaned and cried, shrill and unashamed into the night as he fucked you, fucked you against a rock with his grunts and groans hot against your skin. You felt so beyond good and filled, your pussy clenching around him like it wanted to keep him inside your forever, which you know you did. He was so big, so long, his balls slapping into your ass and that vein that ran along the underside of his cock rubbing against your walls.
Your tits bounced against him as he pushed into you, angling his hips to hit that spot inside of you that had you keening for him.
“Fuck, Benny… you feel so good, baby…” You whined in his ear as he brought his hands down and gripped your thighs, pushing you hard against the rock so he could really pound into you, the waves smacking in between your stomachs.
“Yeah? My cock feel that good, baby?” He teased, biting the skin of your neck as you let out a sharp whine, throwing your head back at a particularly hard thrust that had your thighs tensing and toes curling in on themselves. You almost went cross-eyed, staring into the stars as you felt your orgasm approaching once more, your skin buzzing and your throat so so dry as you gasped for breath. All you could do was breath in Benny’s scent and air, and it intoxicated you, made you clench around him harder.
“Yessss, It feels… feels so good…” You babbled as he pressed your thighs up a little higher, feeling his balls tightening the more you clenched around the length of him. His skin felt hot, cut up from your nails as you scratched at him, blonde hair a ruffled mess. He still couldn’t quite grasp the situation, how quickly things seemed to have unfolded between you. He was just glad it was over, but the sharp pain in his arm was a dull reminder of his truth; that he had fucked up but now he was making up for it. He really couldn’t even think, moaning into your neck as pleasure sparked down his spine like fireworks, his stomach tightening as he knew he only had a short while left before he’d bust inside you.
“I’m gonna-gonna cum inside that pussy, baby. You want that don’t you? Yeah, fuck, I know you fucking do…” He grunted into your ear, pulling all the way out until the tip of him was at the edge of your entrance, then slamming back in until he was buried to the hilt. You almost screamed at that, moaning so loud you swore birds flew from a tree in the distance. You were always able to take all of him, from his tip down to the base until he was balls deep inside your sweet pussy he loved so much. There was no fucking way he was ever going to leave this pussy, not today, not tomorrow, not until someone tore him away if they even could.
“Yes, yes, I want it, please, please, please…” You pleaded desperately, knowing it wasn’t long before you’d cum all over him once again. He groaned against you, big hands digging into the plush of your thighs as he quickened his pace, brows furrowed as he concentrated on getting you both to the place you needed so badly to be.
Then, with no warning, you suddenly felt the dam in your tummy break as your orgasm flooded around Benny’s cock from where he was nestled deep inside you, releasing a long moan as your back arched into his and your sore nipple rubbed against his skin. You panted, feeling spent and completely overstimulated as your thighs twitched and body slumped against him.
He came with a hot groan a short moment after, encouraged by the tightness your pussy gave him as you creamed around his length for the second time that night. His cum shot up into you and it made you hiss at the tingle it gave your sensitive legs.
He fell limp against you, breathing hard as he rested his sweaty head on your shoulder, the water lukewarm against your pruned skin as you held him against you, petting his hair as your thighs dropped down lower on his waist. You both could feel exhaustion taking over, but at the same time you both needed to just feel each other once again.
A few peaceful moments passed after your orgasms while the pair of you caught your breaths, racing hearts dying down to a calming thrum as the cold evening air cooled down your hot skin. Your thighs felt sore and achey, back probably bruised from the sharp corners of the rock you’d rubbed against. The space between your legs still throbbed, and when Benny slowly slipped out of you you couldn’t help but feel empty from the lack of him, frowning at the uncomfortable feeling running through your core that missed the feel of him.
You could hear the buzzing of flies and the chirp of crickets ring through the air, the moon bright and daunting in the sky as you stared up at it. You gently smiled as Benny gave your neck a tender kiss, stroking his back as he settled his hands on your waist once more.
You held onto him tight as he cleared his throat, his eyes heavy and his body satisfied and spent. His arm ached like a motherfucker, a thin patch of pink peeking through the soaked bandage but he didn’t care. If anything, every time he would look at the scar there he would always think about this moment, how beautiful you looked in the moonlight, remember your moans and the way you felt around him, remember that there was someone out there who really loved him like he deserved. He was grateful for you, loved you more than you knew. He couldn’t believe that you ever thought different.
You sighed blissfully, gently reminding Benny that the two of you needed to head back, not wanting him to feel rushed. He just nodded, but didn’t let go of you, still hugging you to him like you were the ghost of someone he once loved. You didn’t complain, just hugged him back because you needed this just as much as he did, needed to feel his heart beat against yours and feel his breath wash over your shoulder. You smiled at that, closing your eyes and resting your head against his shoulder as he did you, feeling content as another cool breeze wrapped around your molded forms.
You shivered against him, but he just held you tighter, his heart swarming with his love for you as he vowed to never worry you like that again.
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𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐓𝐇 𝐎𝐅 his palm gently laid over the plush of your stomach, his rough fingers teasing the edge of your tank top that exposed just the smallest sliver of skin. You were still and silent, rigid like a stone, eyeing the dusty window curtains with tense shoulders and mild annoyance.
It was late, that much you knew. You weren’t sure how late though — time seemed to bleed into the crevices of darkness surrounding you and drown itself out; it could’ve been 3 in the morning or it could’ve been nearing daylight and you wouldn’t know. It was just silence, silence and darkness that seemed to dim your understanding of hours and minutes.
Despite that, you felt like you’d been stuck there forever, stuck in that squeaky bed with his arm around you, unable to move and unable to roll over (you knew if you did you’d be nose to nose with him, and that was a situation you very much wanted to avoid).
You could feel him even, feel his presence behind you like a looming shadow — it made your body even more tense and agitated. He was asleep though, had been for some time now and yet you were still wide awake, too focused on the way his slow breaths tickled the back of your neck and the way his shirtless body emanated a comforting heat your cold limbs wanted so badly to shelter into.
You didn’t want to think about those things but it was all you could think about — how dangerously close his hand was to the hem of your leggings or the way his body was so close to yours. It was completely unprofessional and inappropriate, and yet that fact only seemed to simultaneously excite and disturb you.
You sighed slowly and deeply through your nose, wanting to make as little noise and movement as possible so you didn’t disturb him. Your mouth was dry and your body was slowly debilitating from the coldness around you; Will was much bigger than you, he needed more blanket than you did.
Unfortunately, that left you clinging to the edge of the queen sized bed in fear and desperation of leaning into his chest too much, your arms prickled from the cold at the lack of coverage.
You thought it was ironic as you stared at the wall in dwindling thought, how the arguably most reserved and stoic member of the team was such a cuddle bug in his sleep. It was something you never would’ve imagined but always had a suspicion about — you often found yourself thinking about him more times than you’d like to admit, more times than you knew was strictly platonic.
You suddenly felt his fingers twitch on your stomach, your eyes widening slightly in panic when you felt the bed move just a little, just enough to signal that Will was somehow waking up. You snapped your eyes shut when you heard a deep exhale sound from behind you, the warm breath of a sigh cascading over the back of your head.
Your stomach fluttered with nerves, the kind that made your heart beat quicken like you’d been caught doing something you shouldn’t. Really, you hadn’t been doing anything wrong necessarily, but if you were caught awake that would mean you were well aware of Will’s arm around your midsection and yet did nothing to try and take it off you. That was an argument you wouldn’t win, nor one you wanted to start.
And most certainly, you didn’t want Will to think that you secretly wanted it there, nor that you actually kinda did.
You held your breath as the bed ruffled some more, afraid to make a sound and give away your position. Will flipped over onto his back with a tired, gravelly huff — one that had your heart flutter and your skin prickle — his arm languidly sliding off you in a slow fashion that tickled your side.
You clenched your jaw at the feeling of cold still loss, already missing the feel of his warmth and security only his muscles could bring you, swallowing down a lump in your throat as you listened intently for whatever Will might do next.
William, on the other hand, was completely unaware of this, believing you to be sound asleep as he turned his head to look at you, eyeing your smaller body curiously. He noticed the way slight tremors shook your arms every few moments when the cold struck you almost immediately, so inept in noticing the small details no one else would.
He felt pity for you, seeing the small blanket you two were supposed to be sharing twisted up in his own legs.
He grabbed it like the gentleman he couldn’t help but be, gently pulling it up to your body and sweetly placing it on your shoulders and legs as quietly as he could. He made sure every part of your skin was covered in the small blanket despite the loss of it covering his own ankles; you needed it more than he did.
You were immediately engulfed in warmth as the blanket fell over your cold shoulders, a small sigh leaving you at the comforting feeling. Your heart twisted at the thoughtful gesture, longing for his arm around you again and his chest against your back.
Honestly, you almost felt like an idiot. No, you did feel like an idiot.
You hated feeling so giddy just because Will was kind enough to spare you a blanket. Realistically, it was the humane thing to do for someone who’s clearly freezing to death — you would’ve done the same for him if you had the chance.
You were a soldier, tough and resilient, had killed more souls than you were necessarily proud of. You weren’t the kind of girl who blushed and stuttered around a cute boy you liked, you always had more important things to worry about than relationships.
You weren’t taught to care about mundane concepts such as crushes, you were taught to kill. But most importantly, you had never fallen prey to the disastrous slippery slope of love and emotions, knowing how they were the most dangerous things of all. You and Will were similar in that aspect.
So you couldn’t help but feel stupid that you were actually crushing on a man. The word crush alone was so juvenile to you, but regardless what else would it be called? You had a silly schoolgirl crush, an illness that affected the heart and mind of every girl in the world at some point in their lives; you had thought you were one of the lucky ones.
To make matters worse it was a crush on a man in your squad no less, a man you had known for years, a man who started out as your friend but had somehow crept his way into your heart somewhere along the way like the silent assassin he was. And now, that same man was making you feel all… fuzzy inside.
You huffed as subtly as you could, feeling frustrated with yourself.
You settled into the bed, hands under your pillow as you closed your eyes and tried to ignore the pounding in your chest and the ache in your heart. You wanted his arm back around you, you wanted to slap him in his stupid face for making you feel this way, you wanted to yell from the rooftops that you were in love with stupid Will Miller but reality wasn’t going to entertain your silly dreams.
You just wondered if he felt same, or if he felt anything at all.
Plot twist, he did, for that was some of the best sleep he’d ever had in his life.
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