you turn me on to the idea of growing old

I think I might finally delete my tumblr cause I haven't really used it for like a year and I feel ok getting rid of it, it's a place that brings me down a lot unfortunately

I can't believe they actually played foreign object (at Mountain goats extreme)

MY FUCKING FAN BROKE AND IT WAS THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME SANE DROWNING OUT ALL THE NOISE IN MY APARTMENT FUCK ME FUCK FUCK FUCK

I can't handle anything and soon I'm going to be completely alone with no mechanism to make friends as a non-freshman at a large university

I'm just very lost as a human being right now I don't even know what I am except lonely

Joe and I had a conversation about normal stuff tonight and it was really nice we didn't talk about me being sad we just had a conversation and it was very very nice and I hope this continues like it used to

whenever I expect joe to react poorly he is really nice to me and whenever I expect him to be nice to me he reacts poorly what does this mean

first a man ran into me outside of target and dropped his umbrella and then he accused me of trying to steal it and I had to apologize even though I didn’t do anything because I’m a woman and that’s what we have to do so I went into the target bathroom and cried and hid from him and then I got cat called at the bus stop and then I fell over trying to get off the bus and dropped my very heavy groceries including dropping a can of soup on my finger nail and I can’t tell Joe about my bad day because he’s sick of me hating myself but he can’t fucking see how hard it is to love myself when everyone around me is tearing me down

so Joe and I basically broke up without breaking up more of a we're not going to break up over the phone so we'll pretend everything is fine for another week and then probably break up in person my future is destroyed ama

I've been hanging around my friend who genders everything as female and I love it like we were eating pizza on my porch and bugs started to crawl on the box and she goes "bring her inside!!" and it's the cutest thing ever