behind the clouds

       nathan felt terrible. from his heart beating faster than he could ever imagine along with the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach like he had messed everything up. it scared him how they could just laugh and then be awkward like this, and really, nathan wasn’t really wanting to hide how he felt towards the others. “d-don’t be. please.” nathan whispered back. when andretti reached towards the door, nathan reached out too; instead grabbing onto the end of andretti’s shirt. “p-please don’t leave. you d-didn’t do anything wrong.”

Andretti lets out a sigh as he forces himself to look up at Nathan, a small laugh escaping his lips as he hears what the other has to say. “You’re joking, right?”he asks with a laugh, “How am I supposed to believe that?”he asks Nathan as he takes a step back, “I kiss you and you pulled away”he says, his tone taking a more serious approach now. “You pulled away”he repeats, his gaze dropping to the ground. He’s not sure if he’s more upset or embarrassed at this point, he completely misread the situation. But worse than that, he thought Nathan actually liked him.

       nathan was always going to be there for andretti when he needed him. there was no if, thans, buts, or coconuts about that. he wanted to keep the other boy close to him no matter what happened in the end and it was as andretti said that he couldn’t that nathan said in his head, i can. and by that he meant be closer and actually stick around in the room sometimes. not just to see andretti and make sure he was okay, but to hold a conversation with him. although that was all before nathan’s lips were soon met with andretti. it was not something he quite expected. not at all really. so his automatic reaction was to take a step back, opening his mouth to say something when in reality not a single word would come out. he needed to say something before andretti left though. so he forced out three brittle words in a whisper: “you kissed me.”

As he feels Nathan pull away, the events of the past few minutes start to replay in Andretti’s head. Had he done something wrong? Apart from kissing him that is-obviously that was the wrong call. He squeezes his eyes shut as he takes a step backwards, reaching behind him to find the doorknob. He’s getting ready to twist it open and make his escape when Nathan finally says something. Taking a deep breath he opens his eyes, he’s unable to look at Nathan so he chooses to stare at his feet. “I did”he whispers, “I’m sorry”he quickly adds as he finds himself chewing on his lip. He’s such an idiot! Why did he even think that would be a good idea? Kissing Nathan? His best friend, his roommate! “I’ll go ahead and leave now”he adds as he fumbles with the door, desperately wanting to escape this horrible moment.

       nathan stood there, watching andretti cry about his studies and how he didn’t want to go against his mom’s wishes, not knowing what words would be appropriate to say or anything like that. so he stayed quiet, helping andretti up only to bring his own hands up and cup the other boy’s face. nathan’s mom did this all the time to make him feel better. “you can’t cry okay ??” he said in question for as he ran his thumbs over andretti’s cheeks to wipe away the, hopefully, rest of the tears. this amount of closeness was still weird to nathan, but he was trying to express himself in action since he wasn’t good with words. “—if you cry i w-will end up crying too and having two people crying doesn’t seem very good.” and after that it was just a small and gentle smile to remain on nathan’s lips as he moved his hands away. “okay ??”

Andretti chews on his lip as he watches Nathan, his eyes follow the boy’s hand as he wipes away his tears. Feeling the heat of the other’s skin against his, he feels his skin growing increasingly warmer as he begins to blush.”Nathan”he mumbles as he reaches out to grab a hold of the boy’s hand, gently squeezing it. “I don’t think I can do this”he whispers as he looks at his friend. “I can’t”he mumbles as he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. “I’ll try”he says after few seconds of silence, “I’ll try but I won’t make any promises”he mumbles as he opens his eyes. Squeezing the other’s friend as he looks up at him. “T-thank you”he whispers as he takes a step closer, “Thank you”he repeats as he squeezes his eyes shut before he leans in to press his lips against Nathan’s.

1: (truth) Who was your first major celebrity crush? (dare) Put your music player on shuffle and post the first five songs.

2: (truth) What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you in the past week? (dare) Refresh your dashboard and send an anonymous compliment to the person who posted whatever's at the top of your dash.

3: (truth) What are your three favorite things about your appearance? (dare) List all nine of your tumblr crushes, and describe each blog/blogger in one word.

4: (truth) What is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you? (dare) Post the oldest selfie on your camera roll.

5: (truth) If your parents knew everything you've ever done, what would they think is the worst thing? (dare) Tag the three nonmutuals you admire most.

6: (truth) What is the last thing you purchased? (dare) Tag three people you've thirst followed.

7: (truth) How many hours did you sleep last night? (dare) Send an anonymous compliment to the last person who followed you.

8: (truth) If you could go on a date with any of your mutuals, who would it be and what would you do? (dare) Send an anonymous compliment to one of your four "Biggest Fans" on tumblr.

9: (truth) How did you meet your best friend? (dare) Refresh your dashboard. Open the blog of the person who posted whatever's at the top of your dash. Reblog their most recent selfie.

10: (truth) What was your favorite band five years ago? (dare) Tag a blog that posts very different content from yours, but that you couldn't imagine not following.

11: (truth) Where did you get each article of clothing you're wearing right now? (dare) Pick up the closest book to you. Turn to page 39 and copy down line 7.

12: (truth) What are your five favorite girls' names and five favorite boys' names? (dare) Copy and paste the 14th line of text from the last document you worked on in Word or Google Drive.

13: (truth) What's your most irrational fear? (dare) Tag five mutuals who take amazing selfies.

14: (truth) If you could only wear one outfit for the rest of your life (consisting of clothes you already own), what would it be? (dare) Tag someone you follow who has amazing fashion sense.

15: (truth) If you could rock any unusual article of clothing/makeup technique/hairstyle, what would it be? (dare) Go to the blog of the last person you reblogged a text post from. Reblog your favorite of their selfies.

16: (truth) What is your dream job? (dare) Post the four most recent pictures in your camera roll.

17: (truth) Where is the last place you went that took over two hours to get to? (dare) Post screenshots of your phone's lock screen and home screen.

18: (truth) How old were you when you had your first kiss? If you haven't had it yet, how old do you want to be? (dare) Go to the last app/tab you opened. Post a screenshot.

19: (truth) What is the first thing you remember having to keep secret? (dare) Tag five bloggers who you associate with being obsessed with something particular, and list what each of them is obsessed with.

20: (truth) What does your bedroom look like? (dare) Take one selfie and post it. You only get one shot! (No old selfies or retrying, even if you think you look bad)

21: (truth) What three fictional characters would you most like to meet? (dare) Write your name down on a piece of paper and draw a quick picture of yourself. Take a photo of it and post it.

22: (truth) What are three things you're looking forward to? (dare) Tag the last three people you reblogged posts from, and estimate how many followers they have.

23: (truth) What are your three biggest turn ons, and your three biggest turn offs? (dare) Put your music player on shuffle. Without actually listening to it, write the lyrics to the chorus of the first song.

24: (truth) If you could only own five material objects (not counting life necessities like food/water/a house/etc) what would they be? (dare) Put your music player on shuffle. Post what the first three songs are, and for each one, tag a blog that the song reminds you of.

25: (truth) What is the last thing you lied about? (dare) Tag three people you want to know better and ask them each three questions about themselves.

26: (truth) What's the last movie you watched? (dare) Reblog the most recent of your own selfies posted on tumblr, and in the tags say two things you like about your appearance in it?

27: (truth) What are three things you like about yourself unrelated to your appearance? (dare) Post a picture from your camera roll that you've been meaning to post on tumblr.

28: (truth) How do you take your coffee? (dare) Post the last picture you posted on a social media platform other than tumblr.

29: (truth) What are your worst habits? (dare) Put your Top 25 Most Played songs on shuffle and list the first five.

Philippe: i caan teacj youu

Andretti: what exactly does that mean?

       “i, uhm.” nathan stayed there, listening to what andretti had to say about why he seemed so heartbroken and distraught. what was it that jaspar did to make nathan feel better when he had those days kind of days ?? oh yeah, he forced him to be social and he didn’t like that. although he did like the whole distraction part of it. “i w-want you to know that i would o-offer to tutor you but i’m cl-clueless when it comes to political science, i’m s-sorry you failed and you have to repeat though.” he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, standing up just so he could offer his hand out to andretti. “i think we should watch a movie o-or get ice cream or something.”

Andretti lets out a small sigh as he reaches out to rub his hand across his eyes, a poor attempt to wipe away the tears that have been forming since he sat down. “I knew I wouldn’t like it”he whispers as he stares at his feet, “But my mom wants to be a lawyer and how am I supposed to tell her no? She’s my mom, she’s given my everything and I can’t do this one thing?”he says, his voice starting to raise by the time he finishes. “I’m pathetic”he whispers, as he looks up at Nathan. He studies the boy’s hand for a few seconds before reluctantly taking it, and standing up. “T-that sounds nice”he stammers as he wipes the tears out of his eyes.

       nathan would never admit to avoiding andretti. it was a whole awkward thing, at least to nathan, and he didn’t want to be caught in the room with the other unless he was sleeping or studying. but today nathan ultimately had nothing to do, so he decided that it couldn’t hurt to stay in and just, ignore the other. but when said boy entered the room and instantly was sinking against the door, nathan was up and standing in front of him. “i.. uh..” what was he supposed to say ?? nathan didn’t know and instead crouched down in front of andretti. “wh-what’s wrong ??”

Andretti stares at Nathan for a few seconds as he tries to collect his thoughts enough to form a sentence. Taking a deep breath he starts to speak the words just spilling from his mouth. “I failed a huge test that I needed to take to pass this political science class and now I’ll have to retake the class”he starts to explain before pausing to take a breath, “And my parents are going to be angry because there’s no reason I should have failed except not studying enough”he continues. He then shifts his gaze to the ground in front of him, “My mom’s going to be so disappointed”he mumbles, “I failed a political science class.”

“I’d love to get to know everyone better! I’ve done an awful job at meeting new people, my mother would be so disappointed in me... But I think I would like to get to know Nathan better!”

“My mother, I tell her everything and she’s the one person who I know will always be there for me. Sometimes I think I should get another best friend but I honestly don’t think anyone could beat her.”

“Do you mean have I ever been some place high? Because yes plenty of times.”

Philippe: ykno

Philippe: havon near 2 no frends isnt suck a bad thinf

Philippe: less DRama

Andretti: come again?