Andrew G.

cool, i'm glad they feel safe enough to be so open about their identity and attraction, especially since being a MAP is so unfairly stigmatised. i hope they have good, para-friendly support IRL if they're disordered, wether that be family or professionals. it's always so nice seeing people accept their attractions and grow-out of their shame :)

i can't speak for all paraphiles, but it would be disingenuous for me to say, for example, that i don't want to get fucked by a dog, or raped by an older man. i'm attracted to those things, so why should i sanitise my attraction? why should i pretend to only feel my attraction in ways that are "comfortable" or easy to stomach? verbalising it is not the same as acting on it, and my paraphilic attractions are the only "normal" attractions i experience as a sex-repulsed aroace.

but me bluntly stating that i want to act on my attractions does not equal actual harm. i want to have sex with an animal, but that would be harmful and abusive to the animal, so i don't. i want to be raped by an older man, but that would be harmful for me, so i don't. acting as if "paraphiles saying they want to fuck the object of attraction = acting on their attraction and causing harm" is paramisic and illogical. acting as if paraphiles are incapable of basic morals is paramisic and illogical. we're not beasts that are controlled by our scary and unusual attractions, and you don't get to try and sanitise our community and attractions just because you feel uncomfortable.

imagine a gay man standing in a gay bar, and he says "i want to fuck men", only for some homophobe to walk into the gay bar and accuse him of sexually-abusing every man he comes across. and, salt in the wound, every other gay person around him says that he can't dare voice his attraction, because what if straight people get uncomfortable and attack them? <- that's what y'all sound like, both paramisics and the paraphiles desperately trying to sanitise our community (particularly paraphiles also in the proship community).

"paraphiles don't actually want to-" dude, i fucking do! it's why i call it a damn attraction!