I Don't Want to Dissappear

Todays not going his way?

ruined by trauma

you cannot get over the past. you are constantly remembering, never forgetting. you cant live in the moment because the moment is not what brought you here. you are birthed, raised, and killed in the past. you will never get over what was done to you, be it big or be it small. you cannot escape what you refuse to confront.

tagged by: @lapined​

“I’m ready, Maman!” Saiko was not very fond of patrols, but she understood their importance. Shirazu made things a little more fun.

  ‘  couldn’t that really be said about everyone? the state of affairs right now are pretty grim, it’s not even my job but i could go home one night and never make it back. being a nobody makes it so if you do, life just goes on. i’ve had family and even a friend, never make it home, but we had to keep moving on. yknow?  ‘

   there was a small shake of her head. it’s not a topic to dwell on. never mind the matter that it was clear who did it. at least to her it was. ‘ as for school– i think i’d like to be a teacher. maybe for some younger kids– i can’t say i have the patience with older ones. ‘

Smooth move Haise, bringing up sad things, he listened to her and it just pulled at his heart for some reason, moreso then it should. he looked to his cup and put it down with a sigh.

   ‘  it’s pretty nice to have a peaceful job, but the rut can get pretty bad. same faces, same place, same routine– not for the reckless and impulsive. though helped me settle down i guess.  ‘

   ‘  if i could– probably would leave this place one day. i’ve been trying to get to school but, work comes first at the end of the day. for now, i’m content staying here. ‘

“I’d rather have a peaceful job then wonder if i’ll make it to see the sun rise again” ah he got a bit depressing, shaking his head before holding his cup, 

“ Aaaaaaah, poetry, eh? ”

She crosses her arms in a neat one-two flip (a distant voice in her head calls heeeeeeey, Macarena!, but I digress) - likewise shuffles her stance in narrower in one-two shifts of weight! She leans her weight back against the last shoe to move in - grins! And nods, sagely, approvingly…!

“ Of course, of course!

Yeahhhhh… Ibuki can dig poetry! ”

(It helps that fall is her favorite season!! And, you know - tooootally not because it’s the one she was born in!! I mean, like - that’s not the only reason! Seriously!!

…But it does help add to it.)

“ And, and! As a matter of fact, if you’d like!

Ibuki’s got her guitar with her!! She’s been working out the perfect tunes to play under haiku, and tanka, and the like, to totally enhance any poetry-reading experience! ”

I-I’m sure he’s good, madame…

“Ah well....” hearing her offer had him thinking for a moment, as much as he’d like to support what she’s doing, it just doesn’t seem like the time...plus theres people around....right?

“Thank you for the offer but i’d have to decline, we might distract others from what their doing and that wouldn’t be very nice would it.”

‘ i don’t know, i think your short selling yourself. guess you come off as like a coffee veteran. i use to drop and spill drinks all the time, still do sometimes. it just comes with the trade, can’t recall how many times i burnt my hand. ’

‘ i don’t think you could be as bad as this one kid i worked with– well he was older than me but i still had to train him at that job, taught him everything i knew. but he wasn’t the most graceful with drinks or people– bit of an awkward guy. meant well but he was better at brewing than the rest of it. not sure what he’s up to these days, maybe a desk job or something. ‘

“Sounds like a piece of work if you ask me, but ya im sure everyone gets better with time.” something was oddly familiar about her story but he shrugged it off and kept drinking.

‘ i guess that’s easier– beats eating people too. but it’d be nice to just hand sb their drink while working on another without too much crowding. though i think more people would be less thrilled about it. ‘

sliding his drink over to him, she leaned on the counter as though pondering the thought of it all.

‘ we’ve tried new staff but, they never seem to work out– if you weren’t employed i’d hire you. you seem to know your way around coffee, don’t think you’d even need much training huh? ‘

“Guess you got a point there, it does beat eating people.” taking his cup and holds it for a moment with both hands before taking a drink.

“I wouldn’t say i know my way around coffee, its just a natural interest is all....but im flattered to hear you think i’d be good enough to hire, ever thought of tempt work?” he’s kidding of course and takes another sip.

Like the CCG would let him branch out when his jobs a hyper focused type.

‘ well, you know you’re welcome to come by anytime. give me a heads up, could get your drink started for you, ‘ there is a chuckle behind her voice as she gets to work.

‘ suppose one would call it god’s work,making hot coffee for the busy worker. it’d be nicer to have another arm or two though. maybe if i was one of those ghouls they say that have those extra limbs it’d be easier? ‘

‘  you’re here early, wasn’t expecting you for at least another half hour. take it you’ll have the usual? ‘

‘  it’s been pretty standard though, just beginning to cool down from that early morning coffee rush. ‘

“I thought i’d get a start on today the best way i could think of.” he was honest, he enjoyed being here, it was hard to explain but its rather homey. “yes please, thank you.”

“ Hm? Peeking…!

That depends! What’chu reading? ”

She may not be much of a bookish type, but she is a curious one, and yo - writing off reading as use of a person’s hobby-time wholesale is like genuinely writing off a whole genre!!