don't regret. remember.

Your mother dug underneath the sink cabinets for the shoddy first aid kit, directing you to sit on the toilet seat. "How many times have I told you to leave those mean old dogs alone?"

"They've never bitten me before" Was your response, hissing through your teeth―the sound tapering off into a low whine as the alcohol made contact with the open wound.

It was the large black and white one. Though the white of its fur was so dirty it looked more gray than anything else. You had nicknamed the old hound Shadow, because it seemed to have an odd habit of slinking around at night―creeping through the shadows like he was apart of them.

"All dogs can bite, honey" Your mother said, pressing her lips to your forehead in a chaste kiss.

"Not Shadow" Was your soft protest, blinking away tears. You don't know how it happened. You've known Shadow the longest. Fond of following behind him as he took you through the city. And he never once seemed to mind being accompanied by a tottering child.

Your mother regarded you with a critical eye. It was awesome, having a nurse for a mom. Even if she was always gone, you knew she was off saving peoples lives everyday. Yours too. She always helped with your booboos and scratches and even gave you a lollipop after each one. Just as the doctor would. She handed you one now, butterscotch flavored as her mind seemed to wander.

A pit of anxiety formed at the bottom of your stomach. You knew what they did to dogs who bit people. And you didn't want anything bad to happen to Shadow.

"Mom. Don't let them put him down. Please don't" You pleaded suddenly, pulling on her arm with the hand of your uninjured arm. You knew Shadow didn't mean to do it. He was just...you don't know, exactly. But he wouldn't do it to you again. You would just need to be more careful around him. Not provoke him as much.

"You could have gotten real sick" Your mother began, crossing her arms and staring at you impassively. "Rabies is deadly, baby. You know I just want to keep you safe"

"I don't have rabies" You mumbled, staring down at your feet. "I'm fine. Please don't hurt Shadow"

Your mother did not bother to deign that with a response. You could feel her looking you over for a handful of moments. And then she left, as simple as that.

You had no idea why you thought of that moment, suddenly. Perhaps it had to do with Megumi sitting at your dining room table―just barely refraining from shoving food into his mouth.

"Is it good?" You asked, sitting beside him, teasing tone of voice.

Megumi looked up, only for a second or two, before going back to his food. "You know it is"

He was a stray. Megumi, you mean. Drifting in and out of your life. The visits got more sporadic around high school, when your best friend Tsumiki, fell into her coma. It seems that just when you think Megumi won't visit anymore, he shows up to darken your doorstep. You don't really understand why he does it. He knows he's welcome anytime. Your mom practically raised you both since his guardian was rarely in the picture.

You prop your cheek onto your palm, elbow pressed against the table. You do not bother to hide the fact that you're staring. Comparing the man you see to the teen you remember seeing a year, maybe two, back. A habit you've picked up from Megumi himself, ironically―who you often catch staring back.

"What happened here?" You ask softly, gently tapping a scar on the side of his jaw. You suck your teeth. "Looks like it hurt"

Megumi regards you with a look, like he's debating on whether or not to share it with you. "Training. With Gojo"

"Training? What for?" You ask, quirking a brow. "I thought you had bodyguards"

"Do you seem them around anywhere?" Is the soft reply, eyes drifting back down to his empty plate. He looks almost forlorn, pouty. Like he can't believe he finished it all that quickly. "Is there anymore?"

"You brat" You mumble fondly, tousling his hair. "I'm older than you. You should respect me."

"I do respect you" Megumi argues, flushing. "Is there anymore?" He repeats, more impatient. It seems wherever he's been these past two years hasn't done anything for his shit manners.

"Nope. The rest is for Shigeo" You chirp.

"Shigeo?"

"My boyfriend" You inform him cheerily. Megumi doesn't say anything for a long while. Lifts those sullen deep blue eyes and stares at you. "What?"

"Nothing" Is the reply, mouth twisting into a frown. Absolutely not 'nothing'. "You should dump him. He's not good enough for you"

You make an undignified sound, pushing at him playfully. He doesn't even budge. "What! You haven't even met him yet. You can't say that"

"Say what? Who are you talking to?" Is Shigeo's reply, rounding the corner in nothing but a pair of sweatpants. His eyes seem to skip over you entirely, landing on Megumi. You've always thought he had pretty eyes. Dark brown, almost black. Really pretty in the sunlight. They widen now―staring at your stray with caution that borders on fear.

Strange.

"This is Megumi!" You chirp, planting a kiss onto his cheek. You expect him to grumble, or push you away. Megumi hates it when you 'baby him'. But he does not. If anything, he leans into it. "I told you about him, remember?"

Megumi's eyes shift up towards Shigeo. Staring. He's just as protective over you as you are of him. Except Megumi is a lot more intimidating to other people.

"You said he was a 'cute kid'" Is the muttered reply from Shigeo, and tension falls over the room.

"I am cute" Megumi says, who has never really appreciated people talking about him as if he weren't there. His arm loops around your waist and he tugs you in close. You're surprised when moments later, you feel Megumi's lips against your cheek, a smidge too close to your mouth. "Not a kid, though"

Shigeo's eyes dart down to your cheek. You can tell he isn't happy, either. What on Earth is happening right now?

A nervous laugh bubbles out of you, desperate to smooth...whatever this is, over. But before you can say anything, Megumi is beating you to it.

"Can I stay for a few days?" He asks "I want to visit Tsumiki. And your mom, too. She's been sending me passive aggressive texts lately. If I don't show up she might track me down"

You don't know why he asks. Megumi should know he's welcome anytime. You always have room for him. "The guest room is yours. Stay as long as you need."

You stand, taking Megumi's plate and your own as well to the sink. Shigeo's eyes land on you―burning like a laser. "And she wouldn't send you so many messages if you just came around more" You don't both to mask the hurt in your voice.

Seconds later, Megumi is at your side. You stand shoulder to shoulder. This is the closeness you crave. The dishes are pulled from your hands. Megumi stares. And stares. And stares. "Let's visit Tsumiki today, and your mom tomorrow. The third day will be for just us"

"I have work" You grumble.

"Don't I always pay for everything when I'm here?" Megumi asks, leveling you flat with the depth of his gaze. "Why are you bringing that up now?"

"Well, forgive me, it has been two years so my mind is little fuzzy on the details" You snap, snatching the plate back.

Megumi tsks at you, murmuring, Who's acting like a brat now? before tugging you into a hug. You try to fight it, but Megumi's strength always manages to catch you by surprise. No matter how many years you've spent roughhousing with him, and it's more clear at times like these, that you only win because he lets you.

His chin hooks over your shoulder, arms wrapping around your middle and pulling you in tight. Shigeo's still standing there, and you only realize that he is because there's a third set of footprints when there should only be two.

The thought makes you feel guilty immediately for thinking it.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here for you" Megumi whispers into your ear. "I'll explain it to you someday. Just let me stay here for three days―"

"A week." You demand, holding him just as tight. Like you'll stop breathing entirely if he lets you go. "You better stay for a whole week. Or I'll never forgive you. Ever" A lie. He knows you're lying. You'd forgiven him the moment you opened the door and saw him standing there.

There's a chuff of laughter in your ear. Megumi's hand strokes down your back. "Okay. Whatever you want"

It's a promise Megumi can't keep. You know that, you're sure he knows it too. He's never stayed for that long before. He's in for a day, two or three at most. And then he's gone again. A note on the table next to a stack of crisp bills. And things aren't like they were when you were both in high school. You remember being in such a rush to grow up, to be an adult, independent and free. What you would give, to have things be so simple again.

Shigero corners you back on your way from the bathroom. There's a towel wrapped around your body, but it does little to combat the chill from the air, even though you dried off from the shower in your bathroom.

"I don't like him" Shigeo mutters, watching as you get dressed. "I don't want you around him"

That makes you pause, glancing at his reflection from your vanity mirror. "...why?"

"Why?" Shigeo repeats, incredulous, like you're the one being unreasonable. His brows jump to his forehead, and there's a crease, right in the middle. You want to smooth it out with your thumb. "He's too close to you"

"I've known Megumi since he was eight." You tell him, like you've told him a thousand times already. Shigeo's arms cross over his chest, unimpressed. "What? You seriously want me to go in there and tell him to just go back to wherever it is he came from?"

The flat look on your boyfriends face is the obvious answer.

Disgust crawls up your throat. You would never. "...I'm all he has left. I promised Tsumiki I would take care of him. I can't just―I'm not going to just abandon him."

"Fine." Is all Shigeo says, after a long while. "Tell your mom I said hello"

You raise your brows in surprise. "You aren't coming?"

"Some of us can't just call out of work" Shigeo says pointedly and to that, you say nothing.

When Megumi was 16, Tsumiki fell into a coma. The details around that time are fuzzy―moreso because you don't want to remember more than you have to, rather than some failure of your memory itself.

You remember the exact day it happened. Where you were (home; in the kitchen), what you were doing (helping your mom with dinner), what you wore (one of Tsumiki's faded shirts―abandoned after some sleepover a few years back and shorts).

It was strange, because Megumi called. At that age, you supposed it was normal for kids to change from the sweetness of youth to some false, nonchalant thing where it was suddenly embarrassing to show emotion. Megumi never called, is the point. He texted, maybe, but he never called.

Not that it mattered much to you. You saw enough of Megumi in person for that not to matter. Nearly everyday, Tsumiki was at your house―dragging her little brother along with her. He liked to hole up in the dining room and do his homework, or sometimes he wouldn't show up at all. A lot of time, Megumi was suspended. Too much fighting. It was a miracle that he hadn't been expelled.

Once, she said the estate where they lived at with Gojo was too big, too empty. You never pried. It wasn't your place to. Clearly they had no parents and this Gojo figure popped in and out, but gave them a much nicer place to stay. Even now, you don't know the full story of how the Fushiguro siblings came to be in Gojo-san's care, but you've met the man yourself a scant number of times. He rubs you the wrong way.

"Have you visited her? Since you've been gone?" You ask, standing shoulder to shoulder with Megumi once more. There's a bouquet of store-bought flowers in your hand. There's one in Megumi's as well.

"No" Is the reply, and you figured he hadn't. His eyes won't even look down at her headstone.

It had taken months for you to even get the courage to do that.

"Couldn't go without you" He says, looking at you. His eyes are rimmed red with unshed tears. You know you aren't faring much better. "I was scared"

His words pull a sound of sympathy from you. Tsumiki had been in a coma for two years. You and Megumi visited her often. She was your best friend. She knew you better than anyone else. And suddenly she was ripped away from you. In an instant, half of you was missing.

Strange, because the day he called, the two of you had made plans to drag Megumi off to the fair. The two of you had been up the whole night, chatting about the food you would eat and how best to corner him into getting matching face paint. You don't remember if you cancelled the tickets or not. You don't remember anything, except crying a lot.

Your hand closes around his wrist. "There's nothing to be scared of Megumi. It's just Tsumiki"

His hand moves down, and curls tightly around your own. With a wince, you break free―twining your fingers together instead. Even when the two of you visited her in the hospital, Megumi rarely looked at Tsumiki. He stood off to the side, or sat in one of the chairs, and listened to you recount whatever had happened in your life. You always suspected that he visited her often on his own, but, again, you never thought it right to ask.

"I can't" He breathed quietly, defeated. His eyes looked to you, imploringly. "I can't"

Quietly, you shush him. You step closer, gathering both bouquets in a single hand. The last time you had visited Tsumiki had been a month ago. The flowers you left there had long since wilted. But there were no remains. Maybe the wind had blown away the stems. Maybe there was a groundskeeper or something, who threw them away. Hopefully, if there was one, they had spared a few minutes at her grave.

Megumi's face pushes its way into your neck. A few moments later, the tears come. Soft, at first, then hiccups and sobs. He's malleable like this, and you manage to get him on the ground. The bone of his chin digs into your shoulder almost painfully. You've got your arms around him, holding him close.

The flowers are taken from your fingers. Megumi has to pry them away, and you don't realize how tight a grip you have on the stems until he does.

"Hi, 'Miki" Megumi says, voice clogged wet with tears. "Sorry. For not visiting. And for being such a shit little brother. I should've been better"

"Hey, no, don't say that" You mumble through tears of your own. You pull back from the hug, staring at him. "I should hit you for saying something like that. Tsumiki would have done it"

A laugh. There's little mirth in it. "She would've thrown the flowers at me, instead"

You join him. There isn't much joy in your laugh either. "Yeah. She wouldn't have missed, either"

"You're going to be just fine" You tell him, much later, back at the house. Visiting Tsumiki always zaps your energy. Leaves you depleted and exhausted. Shigeo never knows how to really help, when you get like this. Never knows what to do in the random boughts of depression you get around her birthday, or the anniversary of her death. You haven't been together long enough for him to learn you that way.

Megumi's curled protectively around you. This time, you aren't alone. Down in your bones you know that Megumi just knows exactly what you need. You're all he's got left, and you know he's learned you like the back of his hand because of it.

But Megumi's exhausted too. He's sluggish, craning down slow to kiss your nose. And again on your cheek, where he kissed you this morning. His hand finds yours. "I'll be better. I promise."

Your face scrunches into one of confusion. "You don't have to be"

A hum.

"I have to. You're replacing me, apparently" He says, squeezing you tight, voice murmured and tinged with exhaustion―yet alert. Succinct and to the point, as always. Your eyes widen. His nose is cold when it prsses into your cheek. His lips hover above your mouth, blue eyes hooded, boring into you.

Panicked, you turn your face to the side. Megumi's mouth presses against the corner of your mouth instead. There's a moment of prolonged silence, heart thudding in your chest. His hand strokes up and down your back. Idly, biding his time.

You open your mouth to speak. Megumi cuts you off. His eyes rake over your face. "Is it Shigeo?"

Swallowing, you shake your head. You think of him as your little brother. You always have.

Megumi seems to see this written all over your face. "I think it is Shigeo" He says, after a minute, tucking you against his chest―despite the way you protest. He clicks his tongue at you, like you're nothing more than a fussy kitten. "Stop moving. You're tired, aren't you? Take a nap."

You are. But having to obey like this feels demeaning, in a way. You're a grown woman. And Megumi's younger than you anyway. Being coddled isn't so fun when you're on the receiving end of it. Especially when there are more pressing things you want to talk about.

"He's not good enough for you" He says, after a while. Even without looking down to check, Megumi know you aren't sleep. How many sleepless nights have you spent, just like this, tethered to each other like two ships? His lips ghost your ear. "You think I'm keeping secrets? I'm not the only one"

The sun shines overhead, though you are protected from its rays by the shade of tree. It isn't often that you go to the Gojo estate—and the sheer luxury of everything surprises you.

You've never seen a single person own so much land before. The foyer alone is bigger than most of you and your mom's apartment combined. Everything screams of generations of wealth and power. The reflections shine so brightly that you can see yourself clearly in them.

The Gojo estate makes it quite clear that you don't belong there. It creeped you out as a child and you quickly understood why Tsumiki never wanted to be there. Why she spent so many nights sleeping over at yours, instead. It scares you now. But since Tsumiki's fallen ill...it's the only place you know you can find Megumi.

He's here with you now. The grass tickles your cheek. The wind blows. And Megumi is here. Right where he should be. The place doesn't matter that much anymore—as long as he's there with you.

Even this place, a gilded cage, is nothing too scary with Megumi insisting its okay.

It's time for you to start thinking about college soon. Well, the time for that was actually at the beginning of the year. But everyone seemed to understand why school wasn't so much of a priority to you at the time.

Your hands scratch through Megumi's soft hair. He's practically boneless where his head is propped onto your stomach—phone held above his head as he taps furiously at the screen. Some sort if mobile game thats popular with the second years.

You feel like you're running out of time. Everyone had been patient in the beginning. They don't seem to understand that what you need is time. Life has moved on for them but they can't understand why it hasn't for you. It makes you feel bitter and helpless.

Tsumiki was friendly with everyone. But she'll never mean as much to you as she does to them. As a third year, you're constantly plagued with the worry that she'll never wake up. What if she wakes up and you're not there?

You wonder is Megumi thinks the same. If he does, he does an excellent job at hiding it. You can't tell who's being strong for who—you or him.

"Hey. Megumi" You say, peering down at him. He shuts off his phone and tosses it to the side and gives you all of his attention. He isn't like Tsumiki, not at all. You like that about him. "I'm thinking about college"

Megumi doesn't say anything for a while. "You're leaving?"

"Not far" You explain, laughing nervously. "I don't think I'm cut out for something like tha–"

"I think you are" He says, staring at you. You laugh nervously, pulling at the collar of your uniform shirt and look anywhere else.

When you look back, Megumi is still staring.

"But my mom is here. You're here." You pause, swallowing. "Tsumiki is here"

"Do you want me to tell you to stay?" Megumi asks, sounding annoyed. Nothing like Tsumiki at all. None of her gentleness and none of her kindness. Megumi is all sharp, jagged edges with only the occasional smooth surface.

You make an undignified noise. "I would like some emotional support! I don't know what to do"

Leaving means moving on. Staying means...just that.

"Stay or go" Megumi begins. His hand splays on your lower stomach. Your muscles twitch and buck nervously, surprisingly ticklish. "I know it won't be the last time I see you. You're like a cockroach. We're going to be together forever"

His voice is dry and flat. You can't tell if it's a good thing or a bad one.

Then you feel it ; his thumb pressing in your belly button, and his forefinger pressing lower. Too low. His forefinger drags and presses lower, considering.

What. "What are you doing?" You ask, stomach clenching at the pressure. Megumi's head turns so that his eyes are staring straight into yours. "Stop. that tickles"

"It'll fit" Is all he says, monotone as always.

"Huh?" A beat passes. "Wait a minu—did you just call me a cockroach?! You are seriously the worst, Megumi! I'm older than you. Show some respect!"

A sigh. A moment later his hand is gone completely.

"You're so weird" He says, with a huff, rolling his eyes.

"Me?" You screech, loudly, pinching the side of his neck. He makes a soft, pained noise. Good, you think. That should teach him a thing or two.

The knife cracks down on the ginger root, splitting it. Too much force used, if the way the cutting board shifts against the counters is any clue on the matter. The smell wafts up into your nose, along with the spices you've put aside.

You think I'm keeping secrets? Yes, of course he is. Again, you cut through the ginger. There's plenty Megumi isn't telling you. And you're only human. Of course you're curious about them. But he wouldn't like it if you were to going spying around behind his back. So you don't.

Whatever it is Megumi and Tsumiki went through before you met them is traumatic enough for neither of them to mention it. The closer you grew to her, the more you realized that a majority of her personality was just...fabricated. She was sweet around everyone else, cordial, kind. Easy for nearly every boy in your grade to have a crush on.

But around you―she's different. She pushes you out of the way to get first dibs on the remote. Steals sips of your juice boxes and deems it the "Best Friend Tax". Cries into your shoulder when she's screamed herself awake from nightmares. Holds your hand and tells you that you're the only real family she has, besides her sour faced brother.

Flinches sometimes, hiding close behind you, whenever someone whispers tales of the Yakuza. Some hitting too close to home, you suspected. You had asked your mom about it, once.

"Some things, baby, leave a mark on us, for a long time. Just don't bring it up if she looks uncomfortable" She told you, kissing your cheek.

Your mom started inviting the Fushiguros over a lot more after that.

"Woah!" Shigeo chuckles, crossing into the kitchen. You perk to attention at the sound of his voice. "What did I do this time?"

Your hand holding the knife pauses. "What?" You think I'm keeping secrets? I'm not the only one.

"Sweetheart" He says, swooping in and kissing your cheek. Again, on your mouth. "There's nothing left of that ginger besides a paste. Did I forget to take the trash out again?"

You stare down at the cutting board, slightly confused. But Shigeo is right. The ginger you had been dicing is nothing more than a wet mush. Your thoughts had just...ran away with you.

The day after Megumi tried to kiss you, he took you out shopping. His way of apologizing, you think. You both visited a cute cafe you mentioned wanting to try but neither you nor Shigeo ever having the time. The barista at the counter assumed you and Megumi were a couple. You tried to say otherwise, but Megumi had just kissed the side of your head and thanked her.

Neither of you had brought up what happened the day before. You, because you're terrified of where this is heading and unsure of how to stop it. And Megumi, not because he's afraid, but because you know he's allowing you the time to process. He'll force you to face whatever this is, and when he does―you know you won't have time to run or stall.

You had forgotten about it all, nearly. Until you stepped back into the apartment to Shigeo sitting on the couch, watching reruns of his favorite show. The next morning, he was gone. A small note with his new number on it, and that was all.

I'm not the only one. The words repeat in your head, over and over again. What could Shigeo possibly be hiding from you?

"Are you cheating on me?" You ask, voice solemn and serious, staring down at your chopped vegetables. You don't think its that. But.

"No" Shigeo says, immediately. Not a lie, then. "Are you?"

A look of confusion befalls you. "Why would I cheat on you?"

A noncommittal hum. He takes a seat at the dining room table and observes you as you work.

"Usually if someone asks about something as serious as cheating, it's because they're guilty" Shigeo says, carefully, eying you. You realize, with a dawning sense of horror, that is is Shigeo who doesn't believe you.

"I'm not" You repeat, stressed. Your voice sounds high and whittled. This is about Megumi, you know it is. Why is he turning this on you, all of a sudden? " I'm not. Is there...anything else?"

Shigeo makes a soft noise. Elaborate.

"Is there anything else that you're keeping from me?" You ask, looking at him from over the stove now.

There's a pregnant pause. His eyes sweep left, and then right. Subtle. He isn't even aware that he's doing it. "No. There's not."

He's lying.

He lied to you. You wonder if he knows that you know. Maybe. He sits there, silent, eyes suddenly interested into the magnets you keep on the fridge.

Dinner is a quiet, awkward, affair. Both of you poke at your food. Conversation is brief, short, stilted. You wish Megumi was there. His silence, at least, is a comfort to you. Something you're used to. You aren't used to this at all.

You met Shigeo at the grocery store. A year and a half ago.

It was in the laundry aisle. He stood there, in front of the laundry detergents―taking entirely too long to debate between them when really he should have just grabbed one and went on about his business. You huffed, annoyed, and had coughed under your breath. Trying to get him to hurry it up.

He had turned around to apologize, and both of you just stared at one another. He asked you out right there. And the rest was history, as they say. In all of the time that you've known Shigeo, he's never really been a good liar. He always...looks around. As if he's waiting for someone else to interrupt. Or for the conversation to change. And when he realizes that no one's coming, he lies.

You and Shigeo are both honest people. You don't make a habit of lying. And you don't think he does either. A soft groan passes your lips. Actually―you aren't sure of anything anymore. It's been a month. There's been no sign of Megumi. You haven't texted him and it's like the universe is making you suffer greatly for it.

The house is tense and rolling with energy. Words unsaid. Fights over petty things the two of you had never bothered to fight about before.

Everything is a thinly-veiled insult now. Shigeo constantly alludes to you cheating. With Megumi. Everything is about Megumi now. He watches you closely, like he doesn't trust you to go to the bathroom on your own or else you'll cheat on him again. You haven't cheated at all. Sometimes, you want to tell him what happened that day. When he almost kissed you. You want to tell him that you turned Megumi down, that you refused. For him.

But you don't. You're afraid that if you do, it'll give your boyfriend another reason not to trust you. That the insults and passive aggressive behavior will get worse. And if he knows that what Megumi feels towards you is some misplaced feelings, he'll use it as justification for his actions.

You can't take much more of this. It's gotten to the point where you dawdle coming home from work, as you are now. And you've never been one to do that. Always among the first to clock out when your shift at the library ends. But, lately, you don't like being there. A place that you once considered your safe haven feels the complete opposite. You suppose, no one really tells you about that, once you move in with someone. There's really nowhere to go if the two of you start fighting.

Everything becomes barbed, sharp, dangerous. Everything becomes a shouting match and ends with you crying in the shower because you're just so tired.

You pause outside of your front door, arms full with two large paper bags. You don't want to go in. But you've ran off to the grocery store every day this week. If you do it again, Shigeo will have something to say about it. Sighing, your head thunks against the door.

You nearly trip and fall, when the door swings right open. The door you swore you locked before you left.

Megumi is sitting on your couch. That's the first thing you notice. He's wearing a suit. The last time you remember Megumi wearing a suit was at Tsumiki's funeral. The suit jacket is tossed over the couch, like he's been here a while.

Megumi is not the only one in your living room.

"Sh―Shigeo?" Your voice is a quiet wobble, eyes skittering over your boyfriend's limp form. His face is a smattering of blood and bruises and his right eye is swollen. Megumi's hands are no stranger to violence, but there isn't a drop of blood on them.

Your entire living room, and parts of the kitchen too, are just completely trashed. The coffee table is turned over, shards of glass all over the floor. Books and magazines and a flurry of destruction everywhere.

There are three men present that you don't recognize. Two stand next to Shigeo, on both sides of him. The third next to the couch, on the far end.

Your boyfriend's head lifts slightly, to the sound of your voice. A beat too late. You're just relieved to see that he's alive. The bags in your arms drop to the ground and you rush over to him, breathing heavy.

"What...what did you do to him?" You ask, wheeling around to face Megumi. Your hand lands on Shigeo's shoulder. He moves, but only to flinch backwards. There are tears springing in your eyes. You reach up a hand to brush them away.

"You told me she would come home much later" Is Megumi's murmured reply, uttered not towards you, but to your boyfriend. "If you'll lie about something as minor as that, Hayashi Takeo , you'll lie about anything―won't you? Your name, your age, your occupation"

"I-I, swear" Your boyfriend slurs. Halfway through that he's starts coughing up blood. It spittles out of his mouth like a dog with rabies, clinging to his teeth and gums. "I'm not―I'm not lying. It's there. All of it"

"...Shigeo?" He doesn't answer. Fearfully, you fold your hands over your heart. When you take a step back, your foot crunches glass beneath it. You look towards the only person who you know will give you answers. "Megumi?"

His eyes snap towards you immediately. They are hard, and impassive and very angry. In all of the years you have known him, Megumi has never truly been angry with you. Miffed, annoyed. But never angry. Slowly, his eyes soften.

"I didn't want to do this here" Megumi says, voice gentle and quiet like it used to be, years ago, when he found you crying your eyes out on some random bench at the hospital. His eyes flicker down to his watch. "Let's go get some ice cream"

Dumbly, you shake your head. You step closer to Shigeo, hands bunching around the bloodied fabric of his work shirt. His body is warm with heat. "No. Y-you're gonna kill him"

"Did I tell them to kill you, Hayashi?" Megumi asks, glancing at your boyfriend with a look so cold its scathingly hot in its fury.

Shi―Takeo, shakes his head. His hair falls into his eyes, obscuring them from your view.

Megumi hums, satisfied. There's a sharp glint in his eye. You've never been more afraid in your life. "What did I tell them to do to you?"

"To teach―to teach me a lesson"

"Why?" Your heart pounds in your chest. You're crying, you think. Making soft, scared, hiccuping little noises.

"Cause I st-stole from you" Takeo slurs.

"How much?" Megumi asks, voice thin and hard. Takeo doesn't say anything. He gestures towards the man on the right, just a lift of his eyebrows and you turn away just as your boyfriend is struck across the face. You squeeze your eyes shut at the way his breath leaves him in short, gasps. The sound of his spit and blood spilling across the floor and the way he sounds when he's struck―a grunt tumbling into a groan. "How. Much?"

"A mi...million―yen" Is the response, and your heart sinks to your stomach. You gasp, taking a step back, tripping over the leg of what must have once been your coffee table. Just as you're about to topple over and fall, a hand latches onto your upper arm, keeping you upright. It's one of the men you don't recognize. No, it's one of Megumi's...lackeys? Henchmen.

One look from your childhood best friend has the hand releasing from your upper arm. You can feel him freeze up behind you, as if he's afraid.

Megumi stands, and grabs his suit jacket from the couch. "Let's go for that ice-cream now, okay?"

He isn't asking. You spare one last look at Takeo, before a click of his tongue has you scurrying forwards. Megumi's hand slithers down to twine your fingers together. He squeezes. You know you have to squeeze back. So you do. His hand is cold. The smell of his soap wafts into your nose. Even now, your body tilts into his direction, staying close.

Even now―you're comforted by his presence.

The next time Tsumiki asks you for a favor, you're going to actually listen to her before you agree. She took advantage of your daydreaming and pushed you into a stressful situation on purpose!

You're going to kill her. "Uhm. Hello. T-Tsumiki sent me. We're friends from school. I have Megumi's homework?"

You had known that Tsumiki was rich. Everyone did. A few of your classmates had even claimed to have seen her house once or twice. But their accounts never lined up, so you just assumed they were rumors.

"Let her in" Says the bodyguard on the right. They wore black suits, even in the sun, and didn't seem to sweat at all. Your mind still spins over the sheer notion that Tsumiki's house has bodyguards. Not one, not two. But a lot of them, stationed around the property. Even though there's a fancy gate which would keep out even the most determined trespassers. "I recognize this one"

Your face morphs into one of confusion. You've never seen this man a day in your life. But you don't want to say anything. The men step aside. Another bodyguard comes, seemingly from thin air, and begins to march you towards the main building.

There are a lot of other, smaller buildings, littered about. Everything is done in the traditional Japanese style. It looks like something from a history book. You wonder just how old this place is. Everyone you've seen as you pass by is dressed impeccably, which makes you feel underdressed.

"The young master is inside" Says the man suddenly, pointing towards a set of doors. Before you can even open your mouth to thank him for the assistance, he's turning around and leaving.

Megumi is sitting on one of the couches, watching TV. He doesn't turn when the door opens.

You skip over to him, merry grin on your face, peering over the back of the couch. Then think better of it at the last second and stand straight again. This isn't your house, maybe there's a rule about hanging on the back of couches that you don't know about. "Hi! Tsumiki made me bring you all of the work you missed from your classes because you got suspended―"

Oh. He looks terrible.

"Fighting again?" You ask quietly, words dying in your throat whenever he turns to face you. There's a smattering of bruises on his face, a cut that had probably been bleeding, before. It looks like it hurts. "Megumi―I thought you said you would stop fighti―"

"They started it" Megumi bites out, eyeing you warily when you sit down beside him on the couch.

"What did they say this time?" You ask with a roll of your eyes. Megumi isn't exactly known for his everlasting patience and serenity. Even though you've been friends with Tsumiki (and Megumi because the two of them are a package deal) for years, you still mess up yourself from time to time. "Sorry, but teasing you for being rich isn't exactly a good enough excuse to―"

"They were talking shit about Tsumiki" He says, and your mouth clamps shut.

"Well...I can't exactly blame you for that now" You say sheepishly, with a grin, clapping him on the shoulder. "Good job for defending your sister!"

"What happened to 'talking through my problems'?" Your eyebrow twitches. Seriously, how can a mere middle-schooler have so much attitude. You were never like him at your age!

"Anyone who talks badly about Tsumiki deserves it" You tell him, putting your hands onto your knees. "Besides. She's your family. You two only have each other. You protect her and she protects you. Just like me and mom"

No one talks badly about your mom. But if she were, you'd like to think you were strong enough to beat them all up.

Megumi is silent for a minute. "I don't just have Tsumiki. Anymore"

Tears well up in your eyes. You know that the second one falls, Megumi's going to be out of there. He's allergic to showing affection, you think. So you sniffle instead. Megumi groans and predictably begins moving away.

"Well!" You snap at him, faux annoyed. "It's just my allergies! I'm allergic to uhm...to uhm...to dust! You should fire your housekeeper. What if I die on the spot from the severity?"

"You can't die from dust allergies" Megumi says drily "What are they even teaching you?"

"You can so too!" You protest, uncaring of how childish you sound. To be honest, you aren't even sure if that's possible. But no way are you letting him think that he's right. A series of exaggerated coughs and fake sneezes follow, hammering in your point. "My mom's a nurse. So I'm pretty sure I know more than you, you brat!"

"I take it back" Megumi grouses "You are so annoying. No―get off of me, I don't want a hug"

"Why are you sitting so far away?" Megumi asks, eyeing you carefully. You sit on the far end of the park bench, a loose cardigan around your shoulders to combat the chill. "I'm not going to hurt you"

"You hurt Shigeo" You say, staring down into your ice cream.

Megumi makes a disgruntled sound. "Takeo. The man I hurt was Takeo. He's been lying to you your entire relationship and you're still defending him?"

The words make you flinch. "You've been lying to me too...why―I don't understand"

Why Megumi would do something like that. He isn't the nicest guy around, and he stopped getting into fights when he transitioned into highschool so why...why is he―

"Gojo. The man who took Tsumiki and I in, he's the head of the Gojo clan, which is currently the most powerful family in the Yakuza" He says. Casually. Like he's telling you about the weather and not that he's affiliated with the-.

"The Yakuza?!" You screech loudly, but one sharp look from him has you quieting your tone. "Megumi, those guys are seriously bad news. Whatever it is he's offering you isn't good enough! You have to...quit or something!"

A snort. "You don't just up and quit working that kind of life. My real father was apart of the Yakuza too. A different syndicate though, and a real problem for Gojo. But for some reason, he didn't kill us after he murdered my dad. He took us in"

For lack of nothing better to do, you shovel a spoonful of ice-cream into your mouth.

"Either way, my fate was sealed since birth" Megumi continued. "I was going to be in the Yakuza. Just...didn't think I'd be doing it as Gojo's second. He offered me a choice. Said that once I was in, it would be impossible to get out. Tsumiki wanted no part in it. Neither did I but then..."

This part is hard for him to say. Without thinking, you slide down the bench until you're pressed shoulder to shoulder. Even though you're mad at him, you can't abandon him. Just like you've always been. Megumi takes a deep breath. "And then I found out that someone from a rival family had Tsumiki poisoned"

"Oh. The c-coma?" You ask, quietly, rhetoirical. Tsumiki had been in a coma for two years before she died. The pieces begin to fall together. You glance over at Megumi, whose face is blank and impassive. Forcefully so. Even now, he's trying to be strong for you.

The whole time then. It's always been like that. You thought you were Megumi's source of comfort, his strength. But he was yours.

It made sense now, why Megumi hardly looked at his sister, when the two of you visited her in the hospital. His personality growing more reserved. Distant. Why his visits grew more sparse as time moved on until you didn't see him for two whole years. He must have felt so alone.

"I wanted them all dead" He said suddenly, voice so dark and full of hatred that you flinch away. "But it wasn't enough for Gojo to do it. For some faceless lackey to do it. I had to do it. Because I failed to keep her safe. I was supposed to protect her and I fucked up and now she's dead"

You two only have each other Your words haunt you now. You can't help but feel as if you're the basis for the guilt that Megumi feels. You protect her and she protects you.

There's a sudden cold press against your lips. Megumi's kissed you.

"So imagine my surprise" Megumi says, lowly, hand pulling you in by the shoulder "That the last guy I have to kill in order to fully put my sister to rest is. Playing. Fucking. House. With. My. Wife" Each word is broken up with another kiss.

Your dizzy when he finally pulls away. You push lightly at Megumi's shoulders. He doesn't budge. His hand lands between your spread thighs on the bench, pale like the moon. His icy lips are nipping at the side of your neck now. Heat pools in your lower stomach.

"Me-Megumi...we're not, we're not married" You manage to gasp out, thighs clamping shut. Your stomach curls with disgust. "You mean...the whole time Shi―Takeo and I were dating he had...he was one of the ones who―"

You think you're going to be sick. Tears prick in the corner of your eyes and you hold on tightly to the sleeve of Megumi's suit jacket.

He makes a disgruntled sound, and mutter something like don't talk about him while I'm trying to kiss you but eventually works around to continuing.

"It took me a while to track him down. He was a rat, working for a rival family who had also been working for us. An informant. He knew where Tsumiki would be that day. He had been watching her and you too, for a long time. I never even fucking noticed" He says, spreading your legs again. "But before I had the chance to kill him, he fled―along with 1 million yen"

Your stomach swoops. But it's hard to focus on the dread you feel when Megumi has his hand down your skirt, toying with the waistband of your panties and kissing at the sensitive part of your neck he discovered earlier.

"Megu-Megumi, stop" You mutter, panicked, looking around the park for any voyeurs. "We're in a public place―someone could...Megumi, someone could see us, stop"

"There's no one around" Is the reply, cold fingers pressing against your skin. "Did you fuck that bastard? How many times?"

Despite the cold, you can feel the way your face begins to flush. "I'm n-not telling you that!" You exclaim hotly. As close as you are, even some things must be kept private. And your sex life is one of those things.

"So you did" Megumi says drily "How good was he? Not better than me"

"We never even!" You protest "We've never had sex Megumi―so how would you know?"

The wrong thing to say, apparently. Megumi wrenches away from you like you've just insulted Tsumiki herself, eyeing you like a predator would prey. In one quick movement, he's pulling you to your feet, snatching the ice-cream cup out of your hands and into the trash before setting a fast pace over to the car.

The car is a lot warmer than the chill air outside. Megumi pushes you down in the backseat, clambering on top of you. You try to scoot away, but one hand on your hip is strong enough to keep you in place.

Megumi's mouth presses to yours, hand rubbing up and down your stomach idly as he devours you. Kissing Megumi is different than any of the other guys you've kissed before. He kisses you like he's angry, frustrated―but then softens up, hand cupping your cheek and thumb stroking your jaw. Liking kissing you is enough to quell whatever fire and darkness swirls inside of him. He moves back, enough to strip out of his suit jacket, flinging it into the front seat.

"The windows are tinted" He says, as if that makes any difference to you. "Spread your legs"

Your eyes blow wide. "I'm not...I'm not doing that"

"Why not?"

"B-because!" You exclaim, trying to shut your legs again. And again, it's pointless to try. Honestly, the nerve of him! "I don't like you...like that. Megumi, we're practically siblings!"

"I don't think siblings kiss" Megumi says casually, flipping up your skirt instead. You want to point out that he kissed you. You just...reciprocated it for a minute. "And if you knew how much time I spent jerking off to you, I don't think you would believe we were 'practically siblings', either"

"You―you were―?" You stammer, unable to even get the words out

"My first wet dream was about you too" Megumi whispers, kissing you on your forehead. He sounds fond. "I still remember it. You were moaning so cutely when I fucked you. And god, you were a little spider monkey back then, remember? Kept clinging to me in the dream just like that. I wonder if you'll make the same sounds"

His hand splays across your clothed pussy. You can't think, can't even breathe, other than the fact that Megumi is about to fuck you in the backseat of his fancy car of all places and it feels like your entire world is falling apart.

You don't want this. You're sure you don't. But when Megumi's hands reverently pull down your panties (ignoring your protests when he tucks them into his back pocket), you can feel how wet you are. The brush of air against it doesn't help.

"Did that bastard ever get you this wet?" Megumi asks, tips of his fingers spreading your folds and gently trailing through your slick to gently pet around your hole. Your face burns with shame at the way your pussy clenches, knee jerking up involuntarily. His voice is far away and too close, all at the same time. "Did he?" He repeats, impatient.

"No" You wobble pathetically, watching as he shifts even closer. Megumi's hard cock grinds against your ass, heavy and smearing something hot and wet against your ass, even with the layers of his pants and underwear between you.

"I didn't think he did" Megumi says, before sliding two fingers into your cunt. The insides of your thighs spasm like pulled strings, a choked gasp leaving your lips as he pushes his fingers up until the last knuckle. "That bastard couldn't even fuck you properly"

His fingers pull back out of you, and then press back in. Slowly, at first, like he's mapping you out. The rest of his fingers smack against your ass with a soft slip and squelch. There's a determined knot in his brow before he slides them in―and starts finger-fucking you so hard you can't breathe.

"Meg―Megumi!" You squeal, though he shows no sign at all of slowing down. No, no, he speeds up―scissoring his fingers inside of you. A third finger spears into your cunt, thumb rubbing slow circles at your hooded clit. Your stomach curls and rolls, breathing hiccuping into sharp gasps and whimpers.

"He murdered my sister" Megumi growls lowly, fucking his fingers into your pussy like it's done something against him personally. You can't do anything but hold onto his inner wrist and take it. "Steals my fucking money, runs off with my girl and he can't even fuck you properly. How long were you two together? It couldn't have been worth it. You should've known you were mine instead of cozying up with that shithead"

Your insides churn rapidly. Each drag and push is like liquid fire, hitting your body in so many spots at once. You brace yourself against the cool leather seats of the car, heating up with how hot you feel, getting hotter still―chest heaving and heaving for air, toes curling in your socks.

When Megumi stops it pierces you like a physical pain. One moment you're nearly there, whimpering and pleading and the next―nothing. He's breathing hard, staring at the sticky mess between your thighs before those dark eyes slowly trail up to your body.

You cover your face with your hands, desperate for relief. Any relief. Why did he stop? This is wrong, you shouldn't be doing this at all. Much less feeling good from it. What would Tsumiki think? You don't want to know. All you know is that you were so close. You were right there and your pussy hurts, throbbing and you're so ashamed of the gushes of slick that seep out of you.

"I'm going to kill him" Megumi says. His hand cups your pussy, warm and solid. Your hips buck against it―chasing what he had once given you. "Very fucking slowly and very fucking painfully. You can't stop me from doing it. Do you understand?"

His other hand comes up to pull yours away, staring into your eyes. A part of you, despite everything, doesn't want Takeo to die. It makes shame curl in your gut. He was apart of the reason Tsumiki was in that coma in the first place. Those two years were the worst of your life. He was apart of the reason why she died.

But you think of his face in the morning, mussed from sleep. Whiny and always wanting to cuddle. It couldn't have all been fake, could it? At some point, Shigeo and Takeo had to have become one and the same. You loved that part of him.

Megumi calls your name. Your eyes flit to his face immediately. "Do you understand?" He repeats.

"I...I understand" You whisper quietly. Maybe the real reason you don't want Takeo to die is because Megumi will inevitably be the one to kill him. You've known Megumi since he was eight. He has always been a fighter, but he would never have it in him to kill someone.

If that's the Megumi you know, then who is this in front of you?

Hands settle on your knees. Your face flushes with embarrassment as you're suddenly spread open as far as you're able to in a car. You try and cover yourself with a squeak, but the movement of your hips as you move does nothing but reveal more of yourself to Megumi's ravenous gaze anyway.

"I'm not using a condom" Megumi states, flicking open the button on his pressed black slacks.

Your face pales.

Fingers skirt along your side. "We're going to be married anyway" he continues, shucking out of the pants and underwear. You try to dart your eyes away from looking at his cock―but you're a beat too late and you've already seen it. "Don't see why I have to wear one when you're going to be pregnant eventually"

He's big. Longer than Takeo, flush a pretty shade of red. Curving just slightly and dribbling precum. You don't know which one scares you more : Megumi's words or his cock.

He shuffles forward slightly, hooking a hand under you and pulling you forwards. The second, definitely the second.

Your legs snap close. Megumi wrenches them open again.

"Th―that's not going to fit." You say fearfully, whining as you try to break free of the sudden hold he has on you―squirming and bucking. You move so much that Megumi growls at you and then pins your hips down to the seats so that you can't move anything at all.

"It'll fit" Megumi mutters as a pitiful reassurance, bracketing your thighs overtop his knees. His brow knits, face pulling, and it's the most focused you've ever seen him. "I checked. Don't worry"

What's that supposed to mean? But before you can open your mouth to ask, he's cutting through your confusion with a simple, "Relax for me" and then proceeds not to miss a beat as he pushes inside.

Air rushes out of you in a sudden gust of adrenaline, back bowing off the seats with a high-pitched whine as Megumi spears himself inside your cunt. It's like a punch to the gut, flesh aching as you feel yourself stretch to properly swallow the first push. There's a loud grunt below you and then Megumi rocks gently back out, muttering a few choice words as he pushes himself in, all the way to the hilt.

A pair of hands settle across your waist. Megumi's fingers are long and pale against your dark skin, nails neatly trimmed with not a speck of dirt underneath.

"Told you it would fit" He says lowly, words melting like warm chocolate. His eyes flit down your body. "Look" He demands.

You do, moaning softly, staring down at the sight of your weeping pussy stretched around his girthy cock.

Megumi begins leilursely thrusting inside of you, cock bullying further into your cunt, eyes trained down at the place where your bodies are joined together. You've fallen flat on your back, gasping and choking for air. Each slow thrust is enough to make you feel it, impossible to ignore. This isn't your boyfriend, hands too big, grunts and groans too low-pitched to be Shigeo. Takeo.

This is your sour-faced Megumi. Megumi, who likes to pull out until the tip is just barely inside of you. This is Megumi, who likes to slowly push back in, muttering soft praises of how good you feel, how long he's been waiting for this, into your clammy skin.

There's the faintest press of lips to your forehead. Your eyes snap open, teary and wet. He's leaning over you now, cock nestled only deeper for it. His hand braces itself on your shoulder before sliding back down to your waist.

"Wanted our first time to be in my bed" He confesses, gently, hips slowly picking up the pace. His eyes are lidded with lust, skin ruddy and slightly red as your breaths sync into one rhythmic beat. "Not the one in the shitty Gojo estate―the one in your apartment. The one you've always had just for me"

His voice is low and reverent before a sweet kissed is placed onto your lips. "Going to fuck you now" He says, a warning, before he does just that. Your moans punch out of your throat, tapering off into high-pitched keens and whines. Your back arches but with Megumi's hands pinning you down to the seats there's nowhere for you to escape to.

You keen, gasping at the sudden shock sizzling down your spine―entirely too sharp and sudden and forceful to be wholly pleasurable, but achieving that same effect. Yet you clamp and clench around Megumi's cock anyway, tears streaming down your cheeks. One hand claws at the leather and the other grips tightly around Megumi's thumb.

And your orgasam is a sudden burst of pleasure that has your head tipping to the side with a noiseless scream as your cunt pulsates around his cock. "That's it, cum on my cock" Megumi grunts lowly, fucking you through it, cunt hot and slippery around him. Gripping him tightly, but milking at him like you already know whats coming.

Your head thuds against the seats lightly, body going nerveless and weightless in its entirety as Megumi's hips continue to snap into your cunt―chasing his own impending orgasam. Then he's pulling out, just so until the tip is pressing against your clit. His head collides with your shoulder, panting into the space between your neck and shoulder.

Megumi jerks at his cock in quick harsh strokes before painting your pussy in thick ropes of cum. Time stretches out, seconds, minutes, half an hour. You can't tell. You're floating somewhere faraway―only coming back to yourself when Megumi shifts your body upwards, cradling you to his chest.

You blink, slowly.

There a kiss planted on the top of your head. Megumi's voice is hoarse when he speaks. "Was I too rough?"

You swallow. Thinking is still pretty hard right now. "Rougher than I'm used to but...but it felt good"

"That's good" He says, and kisses the top of your head again. "I would never want to hurt you"

You are hurting me you want to say. The words don't come. Even if you weren't' half fucked out of your brain you don't think you could say them. Not to him. You're all Megumi's got. You won't abandon him. Not even for this. Just not in the way you think.

"I didn't know that was the kind of girl you went for" Gojo says, with a smirk on his face that Megumi wants to scratch off. He shoves his hands into the pockets of his navy colored pants, white hair tickling his neck.

Megumi scowls down at the pavement. Gojo falls into line behind him. The black sudan is just up ahead. "What are you talking about?"

"Is that where you've been going after school?" Is the question he's asked in return. "Tsumiki's best friends house?"

Why is Gojo asking a question he already knows the answer to? Gojo is so annoying. "Yes."

"Well I guess you are at that age now..." Says the man, whistling some odd tune. "I just didn't expect you to become such a pervert so quickly"

"Shut up" Megumi barks, clambering into the backseat of the car, face hot. Gojo slides in beside him. He clicks his tongue at the driver and soon, they're back on the road. "I'm not...you're being weird"

"Her skirt rode up when she flopped next to you on the couch" Megumi freezes. "You kept staring at her thighs."

"I wasn't" He lies, jerking his head towards the car window.

"I wonder if her mother notices that you stare at her like that" Hums the man, crossing one leg over the other. There's no use trying to defend himself. He's mostly sure that Gojo's only doing this to pull a reaction out of him. And he's fallen for that trick one time too many.

It's Gojo, who gives in first. "Don't look so down, Megumi. She'll be yours, don't worry" Megumi makes a grunting noise as his hair is ruffled. "Haven't you heard? Good things come to those who wait"