Ali

And it makes me love myself more.

BE STRICT WITH YOURSELF, BUT DON'T LET IT CONTROL YOU.

I have no idea how much I weigh, but I have so many before pictures from February. Every time I see progress, I take a picture.

My pictures are my progress.

I have no idea how much I weight.

I am losing weight. My belly is getting flatter.

HIDE. YOUR. SCALE.

STOP. EATING. WHEN. YOU'RE. FULL.

Only count your calories so that you're aware.

Don't let yourself binge, but let yourself enjoy the food you're eating.

Don't run for punishment. Run because you enjoy it.

We need lifestyle changes. Not quick fixes.

I'm thin because I take care of myself.

I'm thin because I take care of myself

Dunno why.

HEY.

Shut the fuck up.

You ARE enough.

It's okay to want to lose weight.

It's okay to be a little sick in the head.

It's okay.

But it's NOT okay to decide you're not worth it.

And it's NOT okay to tell yourself you aren't

enough.

You're gorgeous and I love you.

Woah wait she's too thin

And then other times I see thinspo and I think

Woah wait she's angelic

And I did such a good job restricting today, too!

Food: 931 Calories

Exercise: 453 Calories

Net: 478

I'm so so scared.

I sat down with my boyfriend and picked at the pancakes until my dog came over and I gave them to her. He and I laughed because shes so cute.

My would-have-been 450 calorie breakfast turned into a 130 calorie breakfast :)

I'm so excited..

I think it's because I judge myself so harshly.

I'm so mean to myself and it bleeds through and I end up judging other people.

I feel healthier when I'm hungry.

I just feel heavy.

I feel disgusting.

I feel like I've undone everything I've worked for.

I feel huge.

Is that possible?? To undo months worth of weight loss in a week??

Fuck.

But now I'm just scared of the scale altogether.

But I call myself Fatass. And Stupid Bitch.

<3

I'm 18 years old, 5'1, and started at 150 lbs (68 kg) in Feburary. I started running and eating less. Then I got fucking lazy lmao. So now I eat less than before. I last looked at the scale 2 months ago back in April...? Maybe March. But the last I looked at it i was 143 lbs. So from Feburary to March I lost about 7 lbs.

I've been restricting more since then, but I have no idea how much I weigh. I count my calories in and burned. If its at all accurate then I SHOULD have lost another 8 lbs since May. I SHOULD be 135 lbs. But I haven't looked at the scale. I'm kind of scared to. I like not knowing. I'm afraid I'll binge.

As far as what I've noticed?

-my "love handles" are.. I mean they're almost gone! Its not good enough but I'm proud of myself.

-my hands!!! My hands used to be so fat. I had dimples at each knuckle. I still have those dimples but they're so much shallower and I sometimes see more than just fat on my hands. My hands are becoming thinner.

-my smile doesn't dissappear when I smile anymore. It doesn't sink into fat cheeks. I feel prettier. My face feels thinner.

-my belly isn't as round and fat. I still cry in the mirror but I also wake up and dance naked in front of it sometimes.

-my boobs!!! What?? I lost fat under my boobs and now they seem bigger! They seem perky and rounder. They used to fall over in different directions and now.. i actually feel happier with them.

I want to focus mostly on how the good. I don't want to talk about how bad I feel. I think it might discourage me. And while this is a weightloss blog.. I'm not nearly as impressive as the other girls on here. This is gonna be my little diary though. And I'm excited to see what all will happen and change in my body over the next few months.