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As I got older, I realized teaching was my passion, so I returned to the very school district I grew up in. Still… late at night, there was always something I craved more—fame.

Then one day, a woman moved in next door. I came over with a cup of sugar, and next thing I knew, we were talking like we’d known each other for years. The sparks were flying. She was sexy, and I could tell she was feeling me too. I took her to my favorite New Orleans restaurant, got her number, and things got a little heated. Maybe we took it too far for a first date—but what can I say? The ladies love me.

Not long after, I got a call saying I’d been chosen for a Love Island–type show. I took the chance. If it’s a fraud, oh well. And if it’s real? Maybe this is finally my shot at fame.

My Family bought me this two-story home with a bakery attached. How did I get this place? I am not sure if we are an average middle-class family. The first thing I did was make my way to the pool. As I was enjoying my swim, I heard the doorbell ring. I met my neighbors, but Candy Behr is a drug dealer/Dj. We were talking about the drugs she sold. I went inside and saw a random book on the table titled Death & Love. In a horror movie, I know the audience would scream at me to not read the book, but I did.

Regine Vaughn: Eathday isyay ovelay andyay ightlay . easeplay omecay otay emay andyay akemay ymay eamsdray omecay uetray. (Death is love and light. Please come to me and make my dreams come true.)

After reading the text out loud, nothing happened, so I went to bed. People made it seem like reading ancient languages would bring misfortune, but the joke's on them; nothing happened to me. Hours later, I awake to see the Grim Reaper. I was sad thinking about what was going to happen. But he and I had a conversation, and he was, dare I say, sexy. I was crushing hard and needed to make him mine.