Make em Laugh #2 (I’ve posted this before, but this is a better image than the first one.)

TRIGGER  MENTIONS : death, murder, threats, nsfw, gore, violence, and torment/torture.

❝ They say that battle changes you. ❞ 

❝ Your mind tricks won’t harm me. ❞ 

❝ This sure is a funny way to show it. ❞ 

❝ Your heartbeat says you’re lying. ❞ 

❝ I took one life to save millions. ❞ 

❝ Ready for some slapstick? ❞ 

❝ Everyone has a price, even you. ❞ 

❝ I don’t want to hurt you. ❞ 

❝ Still trying to kill me? ❞ 

❝ I need help testing some new gear. ❞ 

❝ We both knew it would come to this. ❞ 

❝ I’ll try to make it painless. ❞ 

❝ Today, we show the world that we are superior!  ❞ 

❝ Good worlds are hard to come by. ❞ 

❝ All screamed out?  ❞ 

❝ I’ll claw my way out, never back me into a corner. ❞ 

❝ Hit me like you mean it, hero.  ❞ 

❝ Come on, lift up that mask!   ❞ 

❝ You know, we’re both getting too old for this.  ❞ 

❝ Let me guess… I’m going back to jail.  ❞ 

❝ Those rumors are greatly exaggerated. ❞ 

❝ Don’t you get tired of shooting people?  ❞ 

❝ Let’s kill you and see where that gets us. ❞ 

❝ When did I get on your bad side?  ❞ 

❝ I’ll sell your organs and your spare parts. ❞ 

❝ Shoot yourself and spare me the trouble.  ❞ 

❝ Maybe someone can teach you to shut up. ❞ 

❝ I really don’t like being told what to do.  ❞ 

❝ I think you’ll find it hard to hit me, chum.  ❞ 

❝ Stop tryin’ to kill me, will ya?  ❞ 

❝ Let nature run its course.  ❞ 

❝ Did I mention I’m poison?  ❞ 

❝ I’ll spit on your grave.  ❞ 

❝ Hope you don’t mind a few scars. ❞ 

❝ A little torture wasn’t gonna break me.  ❞ 

❝ You would have whipped them into submission. ❞ 

❝ Violence will reveal your true nature. ❞ 

❝ What’s the other one gonna be busy with?  ❞ 

❝ You are nothing without your powers! ❞ 

❝ There’s no other reason for you to be here. ❞ 

❝ You want anger? I’ve got anger!  ❞ 

❝ Insects and humans are much the same.  ❞ 

❝ Now that I’m out, your days are numbered.  ❞ 

❝ I hope you brought more than insults. ❞ 

❝ You had any sense, you’d go home.  ❞ 

❝ That’s a good way to get yourself killed. ❞ 

❝ Uh, I kinda have dibs on the whole red thing.   ❞ 

❝ You gotta commit to being a hero. ❞ 

❝ That’s kind of a thing with you isn’t it? ❞ 

❝ You know what… let’s skip the interrogation. ❞ 

❝ A bit of brain-bashing would be relaxing…  ❞ 

❝ C'mon, give a girl / guy a break, will ya?  ❞ 

❝ You’re all business and no pleasure.  ❞ 

❝ Couldn’t you be intimidated, just this once? ❞ 

❝ I have rocked up an impressive kill count.  ❞ 

❝ Your interest sounds more than professional.  ❞ 

❝ Aren’t you the least bit curious?  ❞ 

❝ It doesn’t matter what I feel for you.  ❞ 

❝ Loyalty was never your strength. ❞ 

❝ You won’t joke once I have your tongue.  ❞ 

❝ So you’re just one more thug with a gun. ❞ 

❝ Yeah, that dream was really not safe for work.  ❞ 

❝ As long as I live and breath, I fight evil doers.  ❞ 

❝ Could you be any more melodramatic?  ❞ 

❝ I’ll give you something to fear.  ❞ 

various  quotes  from  amc’s  mad  men  that  i  may  or  may  not  be  rewatching  at  the  moment.  as  always  ,  feel  free  to  change  as  you  see  fit.

“what  is  happiness?”

“you’re  good.  get  better.”

“i’m  going  to  sleep.  you  can  do  what  you  want.”

“what  would  you  do  if  you  were  me?”

“people  want  to  be  told  what  to  do  so  badly  they’ll  listen  to  anyone.”

“my  father  has  never  given  me  anything.”

“just  tell  the  truth.”

“change  is  neither  good  or  bad  ,  it  simply  is.”

“you  don’t  know  how  to drink.”

“you  don’t  want  to  run  away  with  me.  you  just  want  to  run  away.”

“where  do  you  want  me  to  start?”

“would  you  love  you?”

“i  was  surprised  that  you  ever  loved  me.”

“you  don’t  kiss  boys.  boys  kiss  you.”

“are  you  drunk?”

“i  feel  bad  for  you.”

“i  don’t  think  about  you  at  all.”

“you  like  trouble  ,  don’t  you?”

“they  say  once  you  start  drinking  alone  you’re  an  alcoholic.  i’m  really  trying  to  avoid  that.”

“are  you  going  to  make  yourself  cry?”

“you  scared  the  shit  out  of  me.”

“it  will  shock  you  how  much  this  didn’t  happen.”

“be  a  woman.  it’s  a  powerful  business  when  done  correctly.”

“i  want  to  burn  this  place  to  the  ground.”

“you’re  painting  a  masterpiece.  make  sure  you  hide  the  brushstrokes.”

“i  am  so  high.”

“you  say  things  and  you  don’t  mean  them.”

“why  aren’t  you  married?”

“are  you  asking  what’s  wrong  with  me?”

“you’re  such  a  disappointment.”

“i  hope  they  know  you  only  like  the  beginning  of  things.”

“i  think  i  need  a  chocolate  shake.”

“i  don’t  think  you  could  afford  it.”

“how’s  the  city?”

“i  know  you  don’t  think  so  ,  but  i’m  a  good  person.”

“nobody  knows  what  i’m  doing.  it’s  good  for  mystique.”

“if  you  don’t  like  what’s  being  said  ,  change  the  conversation.”

“i  am  so  many  people.”

“are  you  fucking  stupid?”

“i  don’t  think  anyone  wants  to  be  one  out  of  a  hundred  colors  in  a  box.”

every  time  something  good  happens  ,  something  bad  happens.”

“what  do  women  want?”

“who  cares?”

“you’re  so  profoundly  sad.”

“they  don’t  know  that  loving  you  is  the  worst  way  to  get  to  you.”

“you’re  born  alone  and  you  die  alone.”

“you  have  everything  ,  and  so  much  of  it.”

“nobody  knows  what’s  wrong  with  themselves  ,  and  everybody  else  can  see  it  right  away.”

“the  universe  is  indifferent.”