July 2022
An update of 2022.
E. graduated and I went to his graduation. I feel like I have become closer to his family by always going to their family outings. I hope I make a good impression and that my attitude is at its best.
I also had a lot of breakdowns this June. I feel like I was lonely and that E. has become so busy with his graduation. It wasn't always like this. I was okay before of him going out for a long period of time but this time, I am anxious. It is getting worse. I feel like I need people to be always there if I need help without even considering that they have their own lives or their own feelings.
I always wondered that if I leave home, what will I do? and where would I be? I think thinking and overthinking is never good for my mental being but I keep doing it.
I have been thinking, of seeking help. But I think that its expensive. TV Series are a free therapy. I guess, dogs too.
I love my family. I want to help them reach their dreams, but there's something inside of me that wants to cater to myself first. But I guess that is the beauty of living, to be able to sacrifice for others.
