alex and haley

It has been so fun to organize his little clothes, do some laundry (seems so early, but whatever) and to take a good inventory of what we might still need.  The smell of the Dreft laundry detergent may have brought tears to my eyes.  Reminds of me tiny baby Vivi.  Gosh, I still can’t believe that baby girl is about to be a big sister.  It seems as if she has grown a foot in the past few weeks, astounds us with her verbal skills and is so much fun to be with. 

Back to baby boy... I’m thrilled that we finally decided on his name.  We’ve had it for a while but needed to let it sink in.  I suppose it could always change and we’ll take a good look at him when he’s born to see if it fits, but I think it’s a good one. 

We have a busy end of August- we’re both in a wedding and I turn 30!), so we thought that while we have the time, and I have the energy, that we’d start getting everything together.  Last week we brought up the bassinet and changing table from the basement and set it up in our room.  I’m trying to figure out what I want to hang on the walls to make it a little nursery for us for the next few months.  We assume he’ll be with us for the first 4-6 months and then we’ll do the big move-in with big sister. I love walking by our room or waking up each morning seeing all of his little things.  I’m loving all of the greens, blues and grey and still can’t believe a little boy will soon join our family. 

I’m also starting to prepare a little more for the birth.  With it being at home, there’s a little more we have to think about as far as supplies go.  Our midwife gave us a supply list and we purchased a home birth kit with sterile tools that are ours. And I’m working on the new and improved birth playlist as I type.  I’ve already warned our midwife that I’ll probably have the music playing fairly loud.  During my first delivery in the hospital, the music was playing but I could only hear it now and then, whereas when we were home, I had it louder and could hear each song.  I’m a music person, and music has the ability to take me to other places, which is one of my coping methods during birth.  So I’m excited to revamp the playlist. 

I’m to the point where I’m ready to meet him.  I’m ready to experience the feeling of having a baby boy in my arms.  I can’t wait to know who he is, what he likes and what his overall vibe will be.  Vivi was a super calm and easy baby who slept, ate and smiled so we have high hopes! I’m anxious for Vivi to meet him. My eyes fill with tears thinking about the moment she meets him and those first few hours after she finally gets to meet her baby brother.  We’ve been talking about him more and more lately since we’re getting close and she seems to be really excited.  She’ll grab a few of his infant toys and walk up to my belly and say- “baby brother, come out and play?”.  A big reason in choosing home birth this time around was to not be separated from Vivi for an extended amount of time.  It’s important to me to have us all to be together during this huge moment for our family.

This update was all over the place, but in a nutshell, we’re thrilled to meet the newest member of our family and it all feels like it’s just around the corner. 

Vivi is a playful, funny and smart little girl who cares about others’ feelings and gets very upset when we drop or spill things, even a small glass of water.  She has blown us away with her speech and is speaking in short sentences and has phrases.  Her ability to pluralize words and know how to use proper speech such as, “I want to spin” or “I’m spinning”.  

She still eats pretty well for the most part- she has some picky days but overall is a great eater and prefers things like nuts and fruit over crackers or processed stuff.  She only drinks water, no milk or juice.  

She’s still sleeping great, 11-13 hours a night and a 2.5-3 hour nap during the day, so is very rested.  We recently had a friend in town who at first was shocked at how much she sleeps but then after being with us for a few days understood why.  Vivi is not obnoxiously energetic in an annoying she never stops kind of way but rather, she is a very busy little girl. Whether she’s telling a story, cooking in her kitchen, dancing or “grocery shopping” she stays quite busy.  We don’t ever have the TV on around her, only music and talking, so I like that she has lots of quiet time to herself to sing, talk or just think.  I think that’s pretty important for development.  I don’t want her to always be stimulated and I want her to find moments where she’s bored and figure out how to change that.  That’s just my opinion.  

Anyway, we still can’t believe that we’re about to have a two year old or just how much we love this little human.  She is absolutely perfect to us and we enjoy every moment of every day we get to be with her.  

Now, for some pictures :)

You might remember a post I wrote when pregnant with Vivi that explained our “birth plan”, where we were delivering and my overall thoughts on an intervention-free birth.  It’s funny for me to read, because in that post, I mentioned that a home birth with a midwife is really what I wanted to be doing.  Well, this time around, that is the plan.  We have found a wonderful home birth midwife who lives right in our neighborhood, who comes to our home for all appointments (spending an hour or two with us) and the care she has provided to us so far has been nothing short of loving, kind, supportive and extremely thorough.  At the birth, she’ll be joined by another midwife and her birth assistant who is currently in midwifery school.  They are a great team and we feel like we’re in incredible sets of hands.  

Additionally, I have opted to receive “co-care” at the hospital that Vivi was born at. We didn’t decide on the home birth until about 18 weeks, so prior to that, I was seeing my beloved midwife at the hospital.  We just love her and she was fully supportive of our plan- she had two home births herself and offered lots of encouragement to us.  So with the co-care, we’ll see her again at 29 weeks, then again at 36 weeks and possibly at 40 weeks depending on how things are looking.  I find comfort in knowing that these midwives and doctors are a 2 minute drive away for us so if we need them, we’ll go.  They will also welcome our home birth midwife into the door with open arms and she would essentially become our doula to continue to support us through the birth.  I have zero hesitation in going to the hospital before/during/after the birth if that is what needs to happen.  Midwives are pros in avoiding emergency situations by detecting a red flag long before it is an emergency.  I’ll trust my body and her opinion and will not hesitate getting extra help if that’s what we need.  

We decided to do a home birth this time around for a few reasons: 

I was very comfortable at home while in labor with Vivi- and being a first time mom, I think that says a lot.  I was not scared nor did I feel like I needed extra help or interventions to get through it.   Once we got to the hospital, I didn’t receive an ounce of intervention (or anything that wouldn’t be available at home).

We aren’t crazy about the separation from Vivi those first few days after the baby is born.  We’d rather be at home, with her, and keep our family fully intact throughout the entire thing. I imagine part of me feeling empty if she isn’t there for such a special moment for our family. We realize that having a toddler around during the birth and right after, this might mean extra distraction or work, but she is our child, and we’re okay with that.  We also have an incredible support system here, made up of some of the world’s best friends who are like family to us. 

We found a wonderful home birth midwife, who actually comes highly recommended by the midwives at our hospital (she has supported many of them in their own home births) and feel that we are in extremely good and safe hands.  She is not a head in the clouds type of midwife, rather, she is smart, level headed and serious about her work.  She is a loving and gentle person who has been doing this for over 10 years in the area and in different parts of the world a few years before that. She is also funny, warm and is very enjoyable to be around.  

Something that made me shy away from this the first time is that insurance does not cover a home birth.  While home birth is technically legal in MA, insurance companies don’t cover it, although we might figure out how to get partial coverage.  Regardless, we took many weeks to discuss, and decided that in years to come, we would deeply regret not doing this because of the money.  And in the grand scheme of things, its a small amount of money. 

Lastly, I do not fear child birth.  This is a very natural thing that our bodies do and I fully trust the process and my body to birth a healthy baby.  It helps tremendously that I have a husband who believes this, too.  

This pregnancy is going very well so far. Although I am feeling much more pregnant a little earlier on this time, I am feeling really good and healthy, just like last time.  My energy is good, eating well and exercising well. My weight gain is much slower this time and I'm carrying much lower and straight out this time, compared to all around and high with Vivi. Also, stay forever, pregnancy hair and skin! 

We are thrilled to be having a boy and we're just trying to come up with a name- we have nothing! There are lots of nice male names out there, we just can't find one that fits this little one yet. Hopefully we'll come across something soon!

I'm definitely in the sweet spot of pregnancy and already feeling excited to birth and meet this little one. Big sister Vivi likes to touch and kiss my growing belly and play little songs on her instruments for the baby.  Pretty much the cutest thing ever.  

Now for a couple of obligatory photos :) 

Vivi is a tremendous sleeper, 11-12 hours at night, and 2.5-3 hour nap during the day. She has well rested parents and we are so grateful.  She eats pretty much whatever we eat, loves to dance, play in her kitchen and serve everyone tea. She also loves to scribble around with crayons and play with stickers. 

This bright and funny little girl is the light of our lives and sometimes we still can’t believe that she is ours.  I still can’t believe how she went from a tiny girl in a swaddle blanket who I held all day long to this vibrant, energetic and adventurous young girl.   

This pregnancy has been different from the first in that I’ve been much more tired (probably because I have a toddler to chase around and entertain) and the evenings have been really hard for me.  I’m the chef in our family and cooking dinner for everyone was something I couldn’t do for several weeks.  Honestly, you couldn’t get me far enough away from the the kitchen, the refrigerator, the pantry, and all the sights and smells that come along with that.  Just like last time, there was a period when meat and raw vetetables sounded terrible, but now I’m finally able to eat just about everything again.  Raw peppers and onions are the worst, still, just as they were last time. And I don’t think I’ll ever like eggplant again.  Ever. 

Just like last time, I’m very much into exercising and staying as healthy and strong as possible while pregnant.  It’s great to have some energy back and I’ve been exercising consistently again for the past few weeks.  Early in February, I slipped on the ice and landed right on my tailbone, so that has taken some time to heal, so I’ve been doing lots of yoga and pilates, low impact cardio (elliptical, stairs, walking) and have been feeling better. I’d say I am more comfortable this time around with increasing the overall intensity of the exercise, which feels good to me for now. 

I hope to document the pregnancy here, but who knows how often I’ll be able to post.  I’m going to try, though!  Lately, in exchange for blogging, I have been writing letters to Vivi and now will start with the new baby. I love the idea that they have a keepsake from this experience, too, and I hope to keep up the letters throughout their childhood. 

The holidays are over, the brutal winter cold has set in, it’s so dark at 4pm, it’s possible that we’ll be buried in snow and concerned with street parking/shoveling spots, and the spring/summer seems so far away. I should also say that, I actually don’t mind the winter (even though I don’t ski) but there’s just something about January that gets me every time. 

So I’m already sitting here trying to game plan and here’s what I’ve come up with: 

read a good, uplifting book- any ideas?!

get outside every single day, and be sure Vivi does, too

try a new workout class- we have a pilates barre studio next to us and I always love some hot yoga in the winter time!

make it a point to meal plan and eat well

host lots of dinners/game nights (and in turn have things to plan) 

redecorate certain areas of the house so that it’s clean and minimal but refreshing and energizing.  When the christmas decorations come down, I always love to refresh our space to make it clean and bright. 

Spend some gift card money from Christmas, and maybe treat myself to a manicure or massage.  

Not being near family is really tough for us, especially now that Vivi’s around.  Our friends are a tremendous help and support for us but when we see family and they beg and beg to watch her for us, we think to ourselves, we could get used to this! But the reality of it is, we’ll probably end up staying pretty close to the Cambridge/Boston area, and if we had an unlimited budget, we would stay in the heart of Cambridge forever.  Our networks and best opportunities are here, we love the lifestyle and we have a tight knit group of friends that we consider family. 

it’s not out of the norm for people in our area to start families and continue to rent for many years.  I run into people at the playground who have 2 or 3 kids and are still renting in the neighborhood.  This doesn’t really surprise me because while our neighborhood is pretty affordable to rent in, it’s really expensive to own. We’re still unsure of what nearby town we’ll settle in (will likely be close to Cambridge) but it’s fun to think about and fun to look around. 

We are pretty happy right here and now.  Our commutes are really good (20 minutes tops door to door), we have so many things to walk to, including really nice playgrounds for Vivi, and I love the people and the community bond in our neighborhood.  Our biggest fear in moving a little further out is hands down the commute.  Especially now that we have a family, both of us being able to get home by 530 or 6 at the latest is pure gold.  I can’t imagine having to deal with an hour+ long commute in the car (so stressful) and missing out on quality time with the family. I know people do it everywhere, but we want to try and avoid that.  I also hope to always be near a little town center that we can walk to.  Not having to get in the car to do everything is so nice and keeps us moving a little more! 

We’ll probably be in our current place for another year or two, that is, if the three young twenty something guys next door don’t drive me completely crazy. We love the space and everything else I mention above, but the time will come when the “what’s next?” thoughts turn into “let’s make a move!”