alice

I’ve got too much to say and I don’t want to say it.

Too much to yell and I’m afraid to yell it.

Was loud as a child, always told to be quiet,

“You’re too loud, too happy within the system,

sit back, shut up, and please just listen.”

My mind moves too fast for my tongue,

been spitting out nonsense since I was young.

Got me mocked - sneers and meanness that stung

And then stuck           and clung.

Now the state of the world demands my voice

and I have the privilege to pretend a choice.

Because truth is, I’m beyond scared

that whatever I say will be shared,

mocked with others words

and shunned from their herds.

So afraid of rejection, I sit home in dejection.

So sure of ridicule, I make myself minuscule.

I want to convince

my mind: ever since

I’ve sat here alone

I’m no worse off if I’m known.

If the worse that can happen

is my image is blackened,

then I must risk the light

to do what feels right.

I’ll start by speaking what I know

then maybe my volume will start to grow

and my wounded self can finally glow

with risks that are taken and support that is shown

So let me cry out, “Hear my voice one and all:

I have too much to say and to yell and to scrawl.”

I’ll write and I’ll protest and I’ll speak ‘til I’m blue

for a better system for all – that includes me and you.