alcinus

i am a soon-to-graduate gamedev student, posting my art publicly basically for the first time in years.

english is my second language and i haven't been on the public internet for quite a while, so, please be kind!

sorry for the half a year delay on this , OP... university...

she ended up quite detailed, so i decided to post her as a standalone （；´д｀）ゞ

here is the link!

EDIT: it turns out there is something severely wrong with me and i had not realized his hair is brown. i shall make amends. When i continue...

my two options are reblogging here with a specific tag for people to filter out. (though, throughout my tumblr career i have never once muted a tag--do people actually use it? ) the other option is side blog for personal blogging & rbs

any replies with extra insight would be lovely ^_~

First of all, i'd like to bring up that i, in general, consider the series and movie versions of the characters as one and the same psychologically, put into slightly differing circumstances. i don't think the characters' movie counterparts necessarily act different, rather, various parts are played up to serve a purpose.

Thankfully for me, my original, first-time-watch thoughts on series Touga got confirmed in an interview--he's always read to me like someone who, just like Anthy, has experienced CSA, and IMO is coping in a way paralleling hers. Was happy to find out it was intentional lol...

On top of that, I consider them to be quite similar people in the way they're both a bit... empty and malleable? For Anthy it's quite direct, rose bride, the scenes of only her clothing and all. Touga, just as she does, keeps playing up whatever role is expected and wanted of him. Both of their roles are to be an object. (again it all parallels etc etc but i'd say, often, anthy is primarily meant to be abused and touga both used and admired? hanging out with akio and all, lol..)

Something I get hung up on a lot that feels quite meta is that in a way, Touga and Anthy 'switch' their roles in the movie, where Anthy is quite overtly sexual towards Utena, whereas Touga is suddenly upkeeping a more fairy-tale idea of a prince, compared to his usual shenanigans...

I like to note his interaction with Shiori in the movie, where when he starts talking about his father, the conversation gets delayed and they start chatting about more 'inconsequential' things, all the while the flashback keeps playing out. Feels quite like dissociation slash trauma flashbacks, all the while he is holding the conversation effortlessly.

i'd say there's also something to note about him painting her nails for her (something typically feminine. something something his victimization is linked to appearing more feminine. idk man. someone else could probably word this better.)

To wrap back around to series Touga, there's a lot to say about him and Nanami. It's safe to presume he ended up taking on the brunt of the abuse in order to shield her, which is why, for some time, she is able to retain her fantasy of a pure, non-damaging consanguineous relationship. He quite obviously keeps her at an arm's length while entertaining her enough in order to manipulate her, but there very well may be another aspect to it with her affections and all. Plus, in the end, he "indulges" her, "isn't this what you wanted" and all.

There's much more to be said about his interactions with Keiko, Saionji (specifically, saionji feeling below him while what sets touga apart from the others is a result of his abuse) and Akio, but again, I don't feel articulate enough to be able to do it justice and this is already super long and not structured well ^_~