iâm not sure what connor thinks, i havenât heard from him. and i donât want to be upset with him when i know he only said what he said because he thought i said something i didnât, but no ones bothered to elaborate on what it was that he thought i said, so itâs hard not to be upset. as for rylan, itâs not that he doesnât care that iâm gone, itâs that he didnât care i was there until i suddenly wasnât anymore⌠i can tell that much, i just donât want it to seem like i left for the sole purpose of making my absence felt. i definitely didnât.Â
thank you for that. i donât think i mind you telling alexa at least. i want her to know iâm good, i just donât want anyone showing up here. mystery books? like nancy drew? i read some of those when i was little⌠i havenât had time to read anything other than scripts in a while, but i guess thatâs different now. maybe iâll check out the local library. so now you know weâve got one of those :) i havenât been out in public too much when i can help it (iâm not trying to get noticed out here), so iâve been alone a lot. iâve been writing a lot. and swimming some. itâs definitely been nice to get away, but i kinda miss social interaction. these emails are about as much as i get.Â
maybe iâll let you know where i am as the date gets closer, but for now i think iâll keep that secret with me. but keep the day open, just in case. i definitely donât want to spend the day alone, though, maybe it would be good for me. keep my expectations low. i wonât stay away forever, though, i promise.Â
i wish i could say i know what was up with connor, but i have no idea. i was so lost in that moment, thatâs why i just kind of tried to stay out of it, i didnât want to make the situation worse somehow, with my luck i totally would. and if thatâs the real tea with rylan than fuck him lmao? you matter to a lot of people besides those dumb boys.Â
my personal favorite was the olsen twins, i always wished i had a sibling or twin because of them. i loved their mystery books and tv shows, but nancy drew was definitely a close second. i related to her more. honestly i completely forgot that going out in public would be hard for you, sorry. iâm a mere peasant and i donât know what itâs like to be famous. thatâs gotta be hard though, iâm glad i can give you a little social interaction with these :) itâs kinda nice talking to you like this if iâm being honest.
i totally understand, but iâll definitely keep it open in my schedule for you. tell me: whatâs your dream birthday like. it can be as extravagant as you want, just tell me what the most perfect birthday you can possible imagine would be like.Â