i like to think i am immortal (because I am)

We (humans) made all this up. For the sake of simplifying our understanding of the world we live in, we came up with categories that apply broadly to most instances. So when something new comes up, it's easiest to put things in one of those boxes.

This is not always applicable. That's why we have a word for 'fish,' and most people agree on what is and is not a 'fish,' but all fish do not share a common ancestor.

Another example: 'vegetable' is not a useful term in biology, but it is a useful culinary term. So we can put things like tomatoes (fruits), carrots (tuber), and broccoli (flower) in the vegetable category for cooking and dietary classification, even if individually they're different things.

Those kinds of classifications are useful in the disciplines where they are useful, but generally not outside of it. In an ideal situation you look at every instance with individual nuance, but sometimes that can be a bit much.

Arguing taxonomy is a favorite pastime of a certain kind of guy that I work with. It's a way to feel googleably smart, but its not always applicable in real-world situations. (Example: I once said I was cold. He told me that 'cold does not exist, it's the absence of heat.' Which might be true, but hypothermia is real. Warping of metal under extreme conditions is real. Contracting of molecules, shattering of glass, and presence of ice are all very real. So while possibly technically correct, functionally useless as a talking point. Believing that 'cold' does not exist does not make me less cold.)

When trolls are like 'what is a woman,' I'm like... several levels of education above answering that question in a way that they're willing to understand, because they are trolling. They dont actually want an answer and they wont listen to the answer i give them. "You'll still have to go to a procologist instead of a gynecologist." Etcetera.

Those are areas where the words 'man' and 'woman' might be useful distinctions, but it's also really rude to talk about a person's genitals, so I really don't need to know what kinds of doctors they see.

For example, if your neighbor has their TV or music turned up way too loud way too late at night, it's more considerate to go knock on their door and politely ask them to turn it down rather than immediately reporting them to housing authority or calling the cops on them for a noise violation.

Or say your co-worker forgot to fill out a form for something they're supposed to fill out a form for. It's more considerate to talk to them directly and politely remind them, rather than immediately going to your manager and reporting them the first time you notice they didn't fill out the form.

We're all human and we all make mistakes, and we all deserve some grace for our mistakes rather than immediately getting in trouble with authority and/or management. Some people lose track of time and don't realize how loud their T.V. and/or stereo is, and feel bad if a neighbor brings it to their attention how loud it is, and they will feel grateful if you just talk to them instead of immediately trying to get them in trouble.

Maybe someone had to show up to work on only 2 hours of sleep, or is going through a rough patch in their personal life, or is struggling with a disorder like ADHD, and as a result made a careless mistake at work like forgetting to fill out that form. They will appreciate it if you just politely talk to them rather than getting them in trouble with management.

You've probably made careless mistakes yourself, like not realizing how loud you were being, or making a careless error at work. Would you rather someone shows you some grace by just talking to you, or immediately tries to get you in trouble for it?

Of course this is about mistakes that can be solved by just talking to someone. This doesn't necessarily apply to situations where someone is really out of line, or makes you feel unsafe. Say a co-worker keeps harassing you and calling you derogatory slurs, and it's really obvious that they know how hurtful and out of line what they're saying is. In that case by all means, just go straight to management and/or HR.

I didn't go through the bureaucratic process of changing my Norwegian personal ID number, which encodes gender in it, because having an odd number there made me feel bad.

I did it because for someone with my name and outward appearance, having "man" on my IDs reveals private medical information to everyone who sees the document, information that they aren't entitled to know, which they might act on in deeply undesirable ways.

Taking HRT also isn't something I'm doing to be affirmed, it's something I'm doing because the biological processes signaled by having high levels of estrogen and low levels of testosterone are both something I want, and something that helps my overall well-being and functioning in daily life. Material, real, physiological effects that are well understood, easy to look up, and not about some vague sense that putting estrogen in my bloodstream is a badge of validity handed out by the doctor.

Like at some point I just want to ask these people if they actually believe trans people exist or if they just feel obligated to humor the idea to be nice. Have they actually understood that there are people walking around today with the full effects of transition care already sorted? Have they comprehended that the surgeries exist beyond the occasional picture of someone who's still in recovery?