✨Am I The Asshole (AITA) Polls✨

Submissions are open; all submissions will be anonymous unless clearly stated that posting off-anon is okay. Please try your best to give both sides of the story; all submissions will be assumed to be asking the question AITA (am I the assh*le?) and as such will followed by a poll with the following answers:

YTA — you’re the a-hole (the other party is not)

YWBTA — you would be the a-hole

NTA — you are not the a-hole (but the other party is)

YWNBTA — you would not be the a-hole

JAH - you are the asshole but it’s justified

ESH — everyone sucks here (both parties are the a-hole)

NAH — no a-holes here (neither party is at fault)

INFO— not enough information presented

This blog is a WIP but as a general rule submissions that are overtly racist, homophobic, transphobic, body shaming, etc are subject to be deleted from the queue. Please try to keep all conversations civil! As a tagging system begins to be used this post will be updated so that relevant tags can be followed or blocked from your feed. Thanks!

Update: I will start tagging longer questions with #long post in case anyone would like to filter longer asks from their feed. If you would like me to add any tags please feel free to let me know!

Polls that have no apparent conflict or are questioning their feelings about a situation will be tagged as #no conflict and/or #feelings poll so that people who wish to filter out these types of submissions may do so.

Typing this out kinda crying so sorry in advance for any typos autocorrect foesng catch.

My sister (18f) recently finished her final exam and graduated high school. Hooray. She was talking about her exam and stuff and then she got interrupted by my dad and a whole new convo started whatever. Happens at dinner thats normal I get why she might be upset but she is genuinely unable to react to anything normally. After she vlew up at my dad, she turned to me and said: "Do you say the r-word so much because you are onr?"

Like I couldn't even comprehend what she said to me at first, because I never said the fucking r-slur in my life, and i know that, and second of all, that she said that to me? I got up and left and she started bitching abotu how im sensitive or whatever, but it atill hurt. Im not diagnosed with anything, but this word was used against me so often because I was always a bit weird and dudnt quite fir in and what not.

Anyways tjis happened like a few days ago. I havent talked to her since. Thing to mention here, my parents often leave for the weekend to spend time with our grandparents, and bc i still have uni exams, i stayed home and so did she. Usually wjen this happens, i do the cooking and cleaning vecause she is always "too busy" but i told my parents before they left that i wont be cooking or cleaning for her. And I did that, I only cooked for myself, cleaned up my share of the dishes, nothing else.

Parents come back, she cries to them abt how she couldn't enjoy her first days free because i didnt make food for her etc, and now my parents are yelling at me because im being childish and whatnot. I told them she can starve for all I care and locked myself in my room and here I am typing this out.

I just wanna move out but in this economy?

Initially, and secretly, I had a reaction of silent fear to this as it was sort of an adjustment. I felt like a parent whose kid came out to them and I wasn’t quite ready. I told people that I saw the trans angle but think it was left vague so different people can relate (I wish I didn’t). I had a lot of internal feelings of panic as I realized I have sort of been pushing away relating to women because I don’t want to be perceived as one. And yet I still had a problem with Jax being a woman. Not Jax being trans, but being a woman. I don’t know what dislike is worse. I feel like a terrible person, especially with everyone online saying things like “the people who say Jax isn’t trans/don’t accept Jax is trans are they type of people to xyz transphobic/misogynist thing.”

I’ve been trying to tell myself things like “you can relate to people with different experiences than yourself” and “you can relate to women” but it’s a bit of an adjustment and I feel like I’ve uncovered a tomb of secret bigotry. I feel like it’s relevant that my psychiatrist is working on sussing out OCD, so I might just be on one of my many spirals… but I still feel like a terrible person and need to know if I should be working on myself more. AITA for having a bad reaction to Jax being trans?

ETA: TADC Jax anon here, sorry to bother you again. Is it possible to add that at the end I meant “work on myself more (than I plan on already)” or something to that effect? I realized after the poll went up that my wording on that was bad. Sorry again!

AITA for refusing to say I’m on a GLP-1? (I’m not.)

I consider weight a morally neutral thing; by the way. I don’t think weight equates to value, attractiveness, sin, or anything like that. I never comment on others’ weight in a positive or negative way- although obviously, if someone is suffering due to being malnourished or very overweight, I hope and would help in any way I can to get them the support they need.

Basically I went through a depression and binge eating phase about a year and a half ago and gained like 25lbs. I also had undiagnosed hypothyroidism which leads to weight gain as it makes people more hungry and slows metabolism. Luckily I got treated for that, and the depression, and have lost about 40lbs since then at a healthy rate. I don’t eat particularly healthy or anything; I just put what I eat in the calculator app on my phone and try not to go over 1900-2000 calories. I’m just barely in the “healthy” BMI range now (not saying that’s a good measurement) and have no desire to lose more weight. If I happened to lose a bit more, it’d be whatever, but I don’t want to not be able to recognize myself and I already feel great.

Anyway, way too much context aside.

My sister has been obese since high school, as far as I remember. Last year, her fiancé recommended she go on a GLP-1 (he’s a doctor, but not hers.) She has lost about a hundred pounds, maybe a little more or a little less. I don’t have any negative feelings on GLP-1s. If a doctor prescribes them, they clearly know best and they seem to help a lot of people! The only negative thing imo about them is that they cost about $600 a month as they’re not covered by insurance (at least for my sister and the other people I know that take them.)

I’ve actually been a bit worried about her as she is completely unrecognisable to me, and it’s been such rapid weight loss. This is the probably completely wrong opinion of a total layman, but it looks like she’s lost muscle as well as fat, which scares me because I don’t know if that’s supposed to happen. She also says she’s had terrible stomach pain, digestive problems, and can’t make herself eat sometimes. Her fiancé told her the stomach pains were because she needs to “lay off the snickers” which worried me because she is clearly not overeating and has never had that pain before, even after actually eating candy. But I have never mentioned my worry to her, or expressed judgement in any way at all. Or mentioned the weight loss at all to her period, mine or hers.

But I visited her recently and she tried to ask me what GLP-1 dosage I was on. I was confused and said I’m not on one. Because if I had been, I definitely would’ve told her so we could share our experiences and stuff. She accused me of lying and trying to seem better than her by not admitting it. I told her I am not better than her, and that I’m not lying.

She wouldn’t talk to me for the rest of the night but went around asking people if they knew I was on GLP-1s. I don’t care if people think I am/was because I don’t really see that as a bad thing, but I don’t like people talking about my weight at all. I told her to stop, but she tried to get me to admit to being on them again.

I flat out told her that I can’t even afford them, hoping that would maybe get through to her. She took this as me saying she’s rich and spending her money poorly. I told her I didn’t mean that at all and if your doctor prescribed something then it’s definitely not a waste of money, nothing for your health is.

She told me I must have an eating disorder then, which makes me really uncomfortable. I eat around 1900-2000 calories a day, which is my maintenance calorie number. Like I said, I don’t want to lose any more weight. I’ve lost it at a healthy rate and just. Do not have an eating disorder. That felt incredibly offensive to the real people out there who actually struggle with eating disorders, as I can’t even imagine how difficult that must be.

I walked away at that point, and we haven’t spoken since. I’m worried this all comes from her feeling like I’m judging her for being on a GLO-1, and I really don’t like that I hurt her feelings. I don’t know how to apologize/explain to her that I don’t judge her at all, so any advice appreciated. AITA for making her feel judged?

So I live with my parent and am going to college. I’m very grateful as I don’t have to pay rent or for food or anything, especially since Ive applied to a lot of part-time jobs but never get past the interview. (not that it’d do much; the average wage is $10/hr here.)

I’ve had an obsession with moving to a specific city for a couple years now. This isn’t it, but let’s say it’s Philadelphia. I’ve never even been there, save for a layover or two spent in the airport. I am obsessed with the city; it’s my screensaver, computer background, I own a poster and buy any art I find in thrift stores of Philly(with my own money to clarify; I wasn’t *always* unemployed).

I spend time finding apartments that’ll be within my price range when I graduate (my major pretty much guarantees employment) and walking around it on google maps fantasising about showing my family around when they visit. We flew over it recently and got such a good view I could point out streets and famous sculptures, even though we really couldn’t see them.

Anyway, my parent gets very upset and offended when I mention that I am moving there as soon as I graduate and can afford it. They moved where we currently live because all their family is there, and they’re upset I’m not very close to them as we didn’t live in the U. S. for my childhood, and not anywhere close to this state when I was a teen.

The city is only a 2-hour flight away max. Well, Philadelphia isn’t, but the real city is lol. I’ve said I’ll visit often and would pay for them to visit (although they could likely afford it, and are too nice to take anyone’s money.) It’s in the same timezone, and much much closer than where my other siblings have moved

My parent acts like it’s an insult to their family that I don’t want to stay, when I’ve always been open about the fact that I dislike where I currently live and while it’s absolutely not the worst place, I would not choose to live here. It’s very MAGA, the min. wage is like $7.25, I don’t like the culture, and I have 0 friends. All this to say, I am not moving to get away from their family! And I’ve said this.

AITA for continuing to wax poetic about my love for this city?

WIBTA if I moved out because my roommate makes me uncomfortable?

I (25F) let a young couple live with me to split bills and I’m instantly regretting it.

For the previous situation about the couch, here’s a short breakdown: roommate J (21M) attempted to throw out my couch and lied that it was broken so he could replace it with a new one he liked. I fought to keep my couch but I don’t think he was happy with that. I will admit I overreacted in the emotional department, however it seems that the general consensus is that he was objectively in the wrong about the couch. There’s a previous post about it if you need more context.

Since then, J has done the following

• leaves a mountain (PILING mountain) of dishes in the sink every day. I’ve been the only one doing them. He will literally stand behind me and watch me do his dishes: no apology, no “thank you”, no offer to do them himself.

• Leaves wet, undone laundry inside the washer for days on end

• Took over every space in the kitchen for cabinet/fridge space for food, there is not a lot of room for my stuff

• J and R (20F, his girlfriend and also a roommate here) gave their friend an extra key to cat sit while they were on vacation. I was home the entire time. Friend ended up not actually taking care of any cat sitting duties and walked in on me sleeping. I was never consulted about giving a key to a friend, never met this person, and I was severely uncomfortable with a stranger having access to my home while I was alone

• Walks around in his underwear. I understand other people’s opinions on this but it makes me uncomfortable personally, and I always walk into our community spaces fully clothed, and R is also fully clothed in community spaces

• R’s cat smelled like poop and she decided to give the cat a bath in the kitchen sink. As a food service worker, I see the potential for fecal matter contaminating our eating utensils and found it gross. I don’t understand why she couldn’t use the bathtub

My boyfriend’s previous take on the situation was that “they’re kids, give them some time to grow up and you should mentor them” but now he agrees this is egregious and I should move out. My friends all live in an apartment complex together and another room just opened up, they’re offering it to me. They know what’s going on in my home and also agree it’s egregious.

I’m so uncomfortable. I’ve been working 50-60 hour work weeks to come home to a mess that I am not responsible for yet I clean, a nearly naked man that I am not romantically involved with, and no room for me to have any of my stuff available. I am so sad…this used to be my home that I wanted to SHARE with other people but I’m getting the message that it’s theirs now and I barely exist to them.

I want to move in with my friends and take 100% of my stuff with them. The reason why I’m asking if I WBTA is because…

1. Are these things bad enough offenses to feel uncomfortable and unwelcome, or am I trippin?

2. I want to do it by the end of the month if possible (it’s currently mid June, I want to be out by July 1) and we originally agreed a 2 year stay, all 3 of us. However, NO contract of any sort was signed, just putting them on the lease as roommates, and they will be offered the apartment as proper tenants/leaseholders once I go

3. I want to take 100% of my belongings and property with me. This will include the bed they currently sleep on, my couch, the washer and dryer, all of my kitchen utensils, TV’s, bookshelves, tables, lamps, etc

4. I haven’t confronted them about any of this behavior besides the couch. I feel as though I am their mother and these things should be inherently known and respected. It is not my job to raise adults. Despite not having children myself, I feel as though I have mothered many people in this life and I am severely burnt out from it.

Thank you for sharing my previous submission, it did give me some good insight. I’d like to see the results of this one too.

(link to previous post)

So, today we got a new puppy and were looking for names for her. Eventually, we picked one out and my mom texted it to my sister. Turns out, that name was her number one baby name (she’s not pregnant or anything but has a list of names already) and broke into a hysteria. She called us idiots, assholes and many vile things because we chose that name. I immediately told her okay, we’ll find another name for the puppy. Then she told me to fuck off and to never reach out for her again because apparently I don’t care about her. She even started with the emotional warfare saying that we made her cry in her workplace and we are worthless human beings. She only mentioned her baby names like once among many others and we forgot about it but when she told us to change it we had no problem with that.

I think she overreacted and is being a huge b about it. Aita for thinking that?

i've been dating my partner for like a month, they are amab and have never said anything to me during that time about being trans. however, before we started dating we used to text a lot and we were in a lot of groupchats together. they would mention being trans sometimes while we were talking online, for example once someone called them gay and they responded by saying something like "i'm actually trans lol, but don't tell my mom because she would kill me" (obviously i'm paraphrasing but it was something like that). their profile photo also had the trans flag for some time before they changed it.

when we started dating, i kind of assumed that they knew that i knew, because it's not like they tried to hide it online, however they have not mentioned it since. also, when i found a broken mascara wand near their locker and pointed it out, they got really uncomfortable and threw it out immediately, then refused to bring it up. they also have never talked to me about being trans, and i'm beginning to wonder if they're not and i'm just crazy?

wibta if i asked them about it???

so we've been together almost 5 years. i'm very in love with this man and he's never given me any reason to believe he has bigoted beliefs. he has told me that he was in a bad crowd of people in high school (he grew up in rural florida) and when he was in his mid-teens was racist and pro-trump due to his family and peers, but he's done a lot of work getting out of that mindset, is passionately anti-trump now, and has never said Anything offensive or bigoted around me.

we're both trans men, i'm gay and he's bi. he is atheist (grew up catholic), i'm religious/spiritual in a very lowkey and personal way that doesn't really fit into any organised religion and that i don't feel the need to talk much about. i know he doesn't like religion as a concept but i never felt particularly disrespected, he knows i have my own beliefs and that i don't push them on him at all so it's never caused clashes. the country we live in now and the one i've always lived in (not america) isn't particularly religious, so we don't really have any religious friends, so i've never really seen him around people of other cultures or faiths.

he is also very anti-israel/pro-palestine. this seemed great! i am also passionately pro-palestine. i did notice that he could be a little strange about some aspects of it - he has a habit of scrolling through tiktok and ending up in weird conspiracy theory circles of it and he'll get convinced israel is like, controlling us or spying on him through his webcam or he'll tell me he thinks some random event was caused by israeli spies and so on. i just brushed it off as Tiktok Brain Paranoia and it didn't seem to affect him outside of those moments

the other day we were getting a ride from one of his close friends and i don't even remember how they got on the subject, but they were talking while i was just quietly listening and i tuned in to them talking about how they don't like israel because "jews rule the world". i must've made a face or something because my husband turned to me and sort of jokingly went "don't divorce me, i know it's not politically correct". they then started trying to clarify to me what they meant and were saying they "don't hate jewish people" they just "don't think they should be in charge of everything" because right now they're "taking over the planet", and how it was wrapped up in israel/palestine because israel is all jews. it just felt so gross and antisemitic, like it was crossing from being anti-genocide into parroting antisemitic stereotypes and racism and it just really didn't sit right with me at all. i made it very clear i thought it was a weird thing to say and they both dropped it

then the other night we were both talking about our gender journey and how we thought we'd been nonbinary before realising we were trans men, and he randomly dropped that he believes nonbinary isn't a thing. he said something along the lines of "this might get me cancelled but i think there are two genders, men and women". he said he thinks genderfluidity is just being indecisive and a phase until someone decides what they really are whether that's cis or trans. i was genuinely just. utterly perplexed. he's never given me any indication he feels this way before, we have multiple nonbinary friends and have had nonbinary partners in the past and he's never misgendered them or disrespected them even behind their backs. the only thing that's made me raise an eyebrow a bit is that he makes jokes about neopronouns/xenogenders etc, which is a bit asshole-y but didn't strike me as Unforgiveable because sadly a lot of people still think that's "silly" even if they're otherwise progressive and tolerant, and i think a lot of views would change if/when it's more commonly seen and not just online. but to say something like nonbinary/being genderfluid isn't real and that there are only two genders??? when i thought we were Very firmly on the same page about gender and transness? it was just utterly jarring and out of the blue to me.

i feel like i'm overreacting by considering such a life-changing thing as divorce over what is essentially two comments he's made in five years of being together but those two comments have just been stuck in my head lately.

like, if he's randomly dropping things like this after half a decade what else does he think that he just hasn't revealed yet? what does he think or say about me behind my back that he might just not tell me? how do i know i'm not going to do or say something someday that makes him think in his head i'm not a Real trans man or a Real gay man? he's already made a couple of comments about how he doesn't understand how i'm a gay man who also likes boobs (very simple: boobs are nice to look at and fun to squish, i just only care about them when they're on other men)

idk. it's just made me realise that there might be some deeply held morals i have that we just do not agree on and that is very important to me. but on the other hand it was just two comments. idk.

(Just an FYI I'm new to the trading card community)

So a while ago I got my hands on some popular trading cards I didn't care for and sold them a bit less than market value. Well, one was bought by someone living in Poland for $50, add on $2 to pay for the stamp. (I found this works better than the astronomically ridiculous shipping prices people don't want to pay) It got to her about two weeks later, but somehow, through the postal service, it got soaking wet and the card was damaged. She made a whole Facebook post about it saying how this was her dream card and she cares about how they look and I felt bad, so I told her that I'd look for a new one, but warned it might take me a while. I did find one sooner than expected on Ebay and bought it for $65. Well when I asked her just to reimburse me and the stamp (which would mean I get nothing but the payment for the original card and still be at a loss since Paypal takes a 3% cut) she said had thought I'd just look/ask around and tell her about other sellers and she had planned to call Paypal about it to get a refund at the end of the month, which had she told me before I would not have bought the card. I told her I would hold it for her since she said she didn't have the funds right now and was looking for a Summer job. She said the deal was unfair since the first one was $52 and plans to stand her ground on that.

So, I am the asshole? I just wanted to have a reputation as a reliable trader/seller since the group I joined calls out scammers.

The livestream is already posted to YouTube by the streamer. It is in another language than english, and I happen to speak both. I love the streamer so much that I am closed captioning the entire 5 hour stream (it’s a good one). I got the idea because I’d captioned a short clip of his before from that stream and someone commented like “omg I love that stream it was really nice to know what was being said”

The stream is from years ago and isn’t getting much new significant viewership in 2026. The only people who would watch my unlisted video are people who look for it on my page and either don’t speak the other language or are Deaf/HoH so the original stream isn’t accessible to them anyway. It will likely only get maybe 30 views conservatively.

I’m worried I’d be the asshole because I’m reuploading someone else’s content. I am a huge anti-freebooter and anti-content stealing person.

I think it might be okay because it’s transformative. The translation/interpretation/captioning of a 5 hour livestream will take months for me. I use specialized person-specific caption colors and caption placement, as well. Also, there are two people in the stream, and one speaks another language that I don’t know but is also a romance language so I can understand a bit or it all depending on the sentence, but for a lot I have to go to google translate and guess at what they’re saying until I get it.

But just because something takes time doesn’t make it not content stealing. That’s why I’m hoping making it unlisted is better; I’d never post this publicly.

Am I overthinking this? Plenty of people flat out steal VODs and reload them without permission, and make money from them. I know this can’t be as bad as that, but I don’t even want to be 1% as bad as that… I could always just keep this to myself, but I know there are a couple fans of these streamers that only speak english and would really like this. WIBTA?

So for context I myself am non-binary, lesbian, and asexual. I also have diagnosed autism. My sister (8 years older, we’re both adults) is transfemme and bisexual. She is married to a man and she refers to it as a gay relationship because she is trans.

Anyway, my sister once laughed out loud for about 30 seconds straight at the idea of one of our family members being asexual, and then said that “At some point that’s just a hormone deficiency or medical problem.” She did/does not know I am asexual.

She claims to support nonbinary people but will not use my pronouns and frequently says she’s “glad she got over her hatred of nonbinary people.” It makes me sad that she apparently ever hated nonbinary people but I understand that we all can change our opinions and I’m glad she has. She apparently does use other non binary people’s pronouns, so she’s said.

My sister also frequently (I imagine 10-20 times a day) uses the word “r***rded.” (The R-Slur, if the asterisks are confusing.) I am autistic and have asked her to stop many many times but her and her husband literally told me when I visited them for the first time that “In this house we say “r***rded”, and if you don’t, then you’re r***rded.” They said that like it was a joke by the way, and referring to a hypothetical “you”, not literally calling me that, but still wrong.

She says she won’t stop saying r***rded because leftists use it as a “litmus test” and immediately assume you’re a bad person if you say it. Basically from what I understand she doesn’t want to be a “woke, language police.” She told me that she uses the word “tr***y” (slur against transgender people) about herself all the time. And I said, okay, but *I* don’t; I’d never call you that. It’s different to call yourself that than if you called someone else that. And unlike “queer” (and I don’t know if that transgender slur is actually being reclaimed or just by my sister so I won’t comment as I’m ignorant on that) the R-slur is NOT reclaimed. No one uses it to mean something positive. This is my own opinion but I feel like she is frequently trying to be “one of the good ones” and “not as ‘crazy’ as the other left-wing people.”

She recently said she’ll stop using the R slur around me because I don’t like it, but I said I’d rather her continue to use it than just pretend she doesn’t around me. I want her to never say it again but lying or pretending not to say it around one person doesn’t do anything.

She also makes jokes that she or our family are “mentally handicapped” when we do something silly or mess up. I am autistic which is a real disability and I don’t like her saying that. She did get this from our dad though who makes that joke very often and did in our childhood too, so I can’t 100% blame her I guess. Our dad also says the R slur so maybe a lot of this isn’t fully on her. But we have the same dad and I don’t do those things. I don’t know.

Finally, I really think she’s sexist. She told me once she’s become stupider “now that she’s a woman” (referring to being on HRT.) She will semi frequently call random people on the street not doing anything, or someone doing something small like taking long to get gas in front of us a “stupid white woman.” We are white. I obviously don’t care about insulting white people. But she never says this about white men. I told her this was sexist and she said “Ahh, maybe.” And I said “No, definitely.” There are other examples of sexism but this ask is too long already.

Putting all this aside… She will pretty much only talk to me about trans rights. I am a huge supporter of trans rights and I go out of my way to call out misinformation and advocate the best I can. I do not have a problem with trans rights. I need to make that clear. I am an active part of my college’s LGBT+ club and we try to do what we can like make presentations educating people and running clothes-swaps to help trans people get the clothes they want/need for free. I am not perfect and I have a lot to work on but I am trying.

Anyway, my sister does not ask me how my day was (we don’t live together), what’s going on with me, or anything else. She only sends me articles about trans rights or messages me about being trans. She doesn’t consider me trans, she is only referring to herself, for context.

While it does hurt my feelings that I respond to all of this with only support and love and agreement and she does not ask or remember anything about me (she doesn’t even know my college major), that’s not the real issue here. For me it would be completely fine if she talked to me the same amount about trans topics as she does now but maybe just asked me how I’m doing every month or so maybe.

The issue is that she is so enthusiastic about trans rights (as she and everyone should be, especially since she’s directly affected), but is in my own opinion a bit bigoted toward everyone else. To me it feels unempathetic and like she only cares about things that affect her directly.

AITA for thinking this? And, if anyone has any advice on how to cope with this or maybe better explain to her why some of these things are hurtful, I’d appreciate it. Like I said I have ASD and part of that is communication problems so I might be really misunderstanding things and not realize it. Thanks for reading <3

During the end of my 2nd year of high school (aka I was 17), my class went on a 5-day-long canoeing trip, where we all had to take care of ourselfes was, the food and tents, as boats and the camping sites were prepaid. I was in a group with 2 of my then best friends; I'm gonna call them A and E.

They are both pretty typical city girls - haven't camped once in their whole life, didn't really go for nature trips with their families and overall didnt liked that much anything which had to do with nature and sport. I shared that to an extend, I love nature, am part of the local scouting community and I went on canoe trips many times before.

I was pretty excited for the trip and before we went, they somewhat agreed that we would cook together on my propane cooker, as it is much cheaper than getting dinners in the small restaurants every campsite has (+ both of them would really often talk about how broke they were, especially E, whos from a Kenya and talked mostly english at home, which will be important at the end, as we live in a non-english speaking country).

The first day of the trip we mostly spent on the trains, as we live a few hours from the river where we were going canoeing and the afternoon we arrived, we had nothing planned and had free time to do whatever. We pitched the tent Ive brought and went on a walk to a nearby village and about an hour later it started to rain pretty heavily, so we had to come back and spend some time hidden inside the tent. I remember us chatting about all things under the sun, but it struck me, that E and A mostly laughed about their inside jokes, while I listened. After about 40min the rain mostly stopped and I went on a walk alone and as I was looking at a random patch of field with sheep I started crying, knowing that even my "loser leftover" friends, as we called ourselves, didnt vibed with me that much. I remember vaguely calling my dad and my friend, while still crying and expressing how alone I felt the entire day. The rest of the evening, mostly nothing else happened; I think I offered to split my portion of noodles I cooked for dinner and in the morning we packed our stuff and started our canoe journey.

That day went well, I was in a canoe with A, and we had a good time. E was with another girl called J, who she was only friends with, because J was always behaving really out of the ordinary, would make racist and ignorant observations, but E just pitied her and didnt want her to feel left out, even though she would not listen to her rambling and only pretend to care. In the evening we arrived to our next camp, pitched it and unpacked our sleeping bags. I asked them, if they wanted to cook their dinner on the propane, as I was going to do so, but they both said no and disappeared for a few hours. After about 2 hours passed, in which I cooked my dinner, ate it, cleaned the pot and read on my Kindle they were still missing and I found them in the camp restaurant eating schnitzels. I asked them why they vanished and they just made an excuse they were really hungry.

The next 2 days went about them same. We packed the tent in the morning, A and I had a good time on the boat, in the evening, we arrived in the next camp, unpacked and then they went for dinner in the camp restaurant, while I spent the next few hours alone. On the 4th evening, we were staying near a bigger city, so we went together to the centre to find some place to eat our dinner. I suggested going somewhere a bit further from the touristy parts, as they were overpriced, but they insisted on going to a restaurant on the main square. When they gave us the menus they were both shocked by the prices and only ordered from the salad and desserts section, as thats where the cheapest food was (the portions were pretty small too btw). After that we walked around the town and had a pretty good time, but we were all happy to be going home tomorrow.

Our last stop on Friday aka the last day, was around 1pm in a random small town, where we returned the boats and had about 2 hours before our train home was leaving. As it was raining and the only meal we ate that day was breakfast and maybe some protein bars, our whole class and teachers went for food in a restaurant called something like Kiosk at a Hungry guy (the name doesnt matter, just that it was called Kiosk).

Me and A were waiting in the line to order, when E stormed from out of nowhere and out of nowhere asked whats is a Kiosk and where is it. I told her that its the resturant were at and that kiosk and buffet are basically interchangeable and asked if she had never heard, that some people at school called our school buffet kiosk. Idk what prompted her to act that way, but she started screaming at me the next second.

That I was mean to her and A the whole week, that I was always speaking like I was making fun of her and her intellect, and that I was overall a bitch to both E and A. After that she stormed off again and chatted with J, while I asked A, how particularly mean I was to them. A was speaking a bit hesitantly, but apparently E was mad about me telling her to not push something by force and etc in a stricter voice, while we were pitching the tent a few times. The rest of the day was pretty awkward, as all my classmates had a blast that week and I had to spend the next few hours on a really awkward and tired train ride home.

During my 3rd year E and A barely interacted with me, even though they both sat behind me (E used to sit next to me for the first 2 years, but after the canoe trip, she started sitting with A). And during our last 4th year together, the seating arrangement stayed the same and I think I mended my relationship with A a bit and I sometimes spoke with E too. But overall, we were never again the same 3 friend group we were for almost the first whole 2 years.

So, AITA for how the canoe trip went?

I, F(18) live with my mom in a small house. I have autism, CPTSD, ADHD, GAD and MDD with traits of BPD, but not enough to diagnose. My mom has Autism, ADHD, GAD, MDD, and CPTSD as well as long with a few physical conditions(Fibromyalgia, arthritis, general malaise and complications from using Ozempic for two weeks trying to lose weight).

Lately, i have been feeling a lot angrier than usual due to how much my mom nags at me to do things. I often forget to do household chores because of my ADHD and Autism. Some of my trauma has to do with extreme school pressure and emotional abuse from said school that has to do with being called lazy and being pushed into exhaustion from school. I used to be fine doing chores, in fact with some, I used to love them. But now I feel deep dread even just washing the dishes. My ADHD has gotten way worse and i generally feel more exhausted emotionally.

My mom tries to be patient with me, but sometimes she gets angry at me for not doing things exactly when asked. She tends to be a perfectionist with the house, possibly due to how she was raised and since shes able to have control of *something* for once. But a lot of this stresses me out because it feels like all my mom does is whine and complain about everything and the sun. it makes me a little mad that she doesn’t praise me as much anymore for helping. Half the time im not even thanked. I get that shes tired and needs help, but I’m tired of it. I don’t go to school because of my trauma(im planning on getting my GED) and i dont really get to go out very much since i cannot drive yet. i feel like an absolute twit for being angry at her nagging, because i understand why, but at the same time it’s emotionally exhausting to be nagged at all of the time.

Am I an asshole?

So I (17 white girl) made a story with my friend like a year or two ago about 17 century, a royal figure and her knight. I was fully in control of the knight and his whole story was my idea. The story was that he lost his memory, found himself alove near ocean, had nothing on him, not money, no home or family (at least that he can remember), so to survive he lived in forests, collecting berries and hunting animals. And then he found a civilization, where he tried to adapt, but spending at least a year in wild, without memories, being autistic and not speaking the same language, he obviously struggled a lot. Because of his very big size and scary looking face town people would make rumours about a "beast" and just not be nice at him. The guy himself had to steal sometimes to survive. Then the royal figure found him and had the heart to let him stay in her mansion, gave him food, clothes and a bath and in return he'd protect her. But even so he still doesn't understand most of things like social hierarchy, relationships, how doctors work ect ect. If we are talking VERY figuratively she had to teach him like a child

The thing is, we started that story when all of our characters weren't REALLY humans, so not really human looking and no race. But then we made it an accurate human universe and I just thought "ye, I'll make my guy black, I think it'll fit" not thinking twice. A few months go by and I suddenly realised that I made a black man who acts "wild" (for the lack of a better word), doesn't know the language very well and mostly talk with mistakes, doesn't understand how world works and he's being used as an angry dog sometimes. All of that sounds very stereotypically racist and I worried I made an offensive story which I wanted to turn into a real fanfic one day

For context I live in a country where black culture is...none existent, so all of my knowledge comes from American anti racism posts and videos and I know I don't know a lot of things

I am in no way want to be a biggot, but also I'm not sure if it really the way it is or if I'm overthinking it. I believe there are black people here who can call me out incase I did in fact do my character dirty and please do if so

So...aita and made a racist story?

Hi! Basically, I had my birthday a few days ago (hooray me) and, because me and my friends are all pretty busy, we decided to meet between classes for lunch as a celebration for my birthday because none of us have the time for anything else.

The problem lies with a specific friend, that ill call Jane for now. She always has something going on in her life, to say it nicely, and this time, even before we sat down at the place we were eating, she was complaining about her family, her grades, her classmates and how everyone mistreats her and so on and so forth.

You can imagine, the atmosphere was very tense/depressing and the rest of us constantly had to go "Oh noo :( thats not true/thats so mean of them/etc etc".

I was getting irritated, for obvious reasons. Its not like any of these are recent issues either, where id be able to understand why she has to talk about it now of all times. Its always the same shit and she is always the victim of it. So I was like: okay lets change the subject, in a way that i will admit, was very abrupt and asked another friend about her classes and stuff.

Jane looked like, confused and lowkey shocked and asked why I did that, and I replied something along the lines of "You have been bitching since we came here. No offense, but i wanna enjoy my birthday and not play therapist the entire time". I know that part at least was rude, but i was extremely frustrated.

She left after that, my other friends stayed with me and one said that it was pretty mean of me, but I still think that i was justified at least.