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I told you I may not constantly speak or communicate wel

But when I speak I actually genuinely truly mean the words I say. Like; I Love You.

How messed up do you have to be to still think that you love someone but you can harm them physically and emotionally without any remorse? You can only love people as deeply as you love yourself so do you hate yourself that much?

You say it’s love but nothing with you was ever love.

Maybe you are or you just pretend to be to get what you want

I don’t forgive you I don’t think I will ever forgive you

You made me feel like the worst person in the world

You claim you love me

But you don’t

You never did

You wonder if someone is able to love you

They are

You just don’t care, and have a fucked up version of what love looks like

I’m angry I’m sad and simply just don’t understand

I love you I really do

You don’t know how to accept love

I don’t care if you apologize

Those apologies have no meaning anymore

All the promises all the different heartbreaks (yours, hers and mine).

And I know everything happens for a reason.

But I can’t help but just sometimes wish

I wish that we never crossed paths

Wish that I never met you

Wish that I never met her

Call it hateful

But it’s not hate

In fact its love

I loved you so much

I know back then maybe you loved me

But at the end of the day everything was going to crash anyway

Because no one would ever measure up to

The feelings that you get when you’re with her

You promised her forever

And that’s how it will always be

You can find someone new but at the end of the day

She will always be in your heart mind and soul

You can tell me it’s not true

But then are you lying to me or to you?

Because you don’t want to face your own truth

Knowing that this lifetime you won’t have the ONE.

So yeah call me hateful but I never wanted any of this

And wish we never went through any of it.

All of it sucked, EVERYTHING

But I had so much love for you I really did, unconditionally

That’s not something you’ll ever know or realize

Because I was never nor will ever be the ONE

for you, and if it does end up being me and you

How unfair to only be there

because you couldn’t win 1st place

So you had to accept 2nd or 3rd

Do you not see how unfair it is, to be with someone just to be with someone, when that someone could meet the ONE for them that cares provides and has such profound, endless, unconditional love for them, the same way you had for her, or I had for you?.

Someone who just gets them and understands, even if words aren’t being said.

(A man moves mountains for the person that they truly love, does anything and everything to be with the one they love unconditionally right? Or am I wrong?)

Then I’m not your ONE those things are true

Because I’ve known people who have made life changing decisions to be with the one they love.

So if you are in-love with me, wouldn’t you move mountains too? Wouldn’t you want nothing more than my happiness?

(Because that’s what I’ve always wanted for you, even if it was with HER or someone other than her, aslong as you where happy and safe just doing okay)

And if you aren’t in love, then why keep me, why not let me go?

What do I give you that is enough to keep me around but not enough to love me in all aspects, through all the ups and downs, through the depths of darkness, and still be able to say I want you and only you because there is no other like you.

Have you ever even tried to put yourself in my shoes the way I do with you?

So tell me please…

What do I give you that’s just enough to keep me around

(Fuck me, sleep with me, go out with me, provide sometimes)

But not enough to say I want you forever and always

( even saying I love you throughout the days, or take me out on dates, give me at-least 1 flower)

So what is it about me that you decide to keep me, but not want to truly be with me?

Because I’m done trying to figure shit out.

So if you want to tell me one day, and give me some clarity give us some clarity

I’m here

But if you don’t want to tell me anything

Then I’ll just leave it to here…

And hope that you’re not too late

Because I really did love you maybe was even in love.

But I was only 50% enough.

When you wanted 100%.

So if I’m not 100% for you

Then leave me alone.

More than you’ll ever know

More than you could ever comprehend

Because even after everything

I still come back

I still see you as a good man

That just needs a little love and care

Pero ekoi no ta cambia e fact ku bosnan a sinta papia

About me mane ami ta esun ku a daña tur kos

Mane ami a get in between bosnan dos

Bo tbta ke ta ku e y sakami fei kas

Pero out of pitty due to e situation ku mi tbta den

Bo no a hasie

Pero it wasn’t because bo tbta stimami

Paso si bo tbta stimami abo sakando mi fei kas

Lo nunca ni cross bo mind

So splikami kon mi ta supposed di pensa ku e love ku bo tin pa mi ta real?

Sometimes I wish I met you at a different time

Then maybe you’d be mine

I could be yours

Without all the messy history

Terrified that if I give us another chance

It will just end up the same as in the past

You’ll tell me you love me

But then go searching for something

Something with someone else

All because whatever I had to offer

Wasn’t right or just wasn’t enough

Or maybe we just don’t align

And all of it would have been wasted time

En ese mente y corazón que tu tienes

En los profundos conversaciones que se que podríamos tener

Porque se que tu alma y mi alma son unidos

Tan fuertísimo que cuando tu sientes algún felicidad

También lo siento aunque estoy muy lejos