She’s in the middle of an appendectomy when the call comes in. It’s a standard procedure, something way below her pay grade, but it’s been a quiet day and Addie had the sudden urge to cut, so she stole the surgery from a colleague with no regrets. It’s therapeutic, and Lord knows she needs therapy right now with the way things are going in her life. She’s calm as she inserts the cannula, her hands moving diligently in a way that tells she’s done this a million times before, because she has. Addison Fisher is one of the most experienced surgeons in Olympus, if not the most experienced, and an appendectomy is nothing to her. It’s practically child’s play, a chance to keep her hands moving when they’d otherwise probably just be doing paperwork. The procedure goes smoothly and she’s just finishing up up when the door to the operating room swings open and a breathless intern rushes in.

“Dr. Fisher,” the intern rushes out, her voice strained and her eyes frantic. “You’re needed in the trauma bay. There’s been a shooting.” And while that’s terrible in any case, the way the intern is drained of color and fidgeting tells her this isn’t just any shooting. Something is wrong, she can sense it before she even takes a proper glance at the chaos she can see transpiring outside of her OR, and that gut feeling is all it takes for her to bark at the resident that’s assisting her to finish up here. She’s out the door in seconds, peeling her gloves off and pushing her way through the halls. Something’s wrong, something’s wrong, something’s wrong. The mantra plays in Addie’s mind on a loop, and she doesn’t panic because a good surgeon never panics but she’s pretty damn close to it.

Then Henry’s there, his bloody hands are in front of her face and she barely hears him when he says ‘it’s Rowan,’ but she doesn’t need to. She sees the gurney, the mass of blonde hair and the blood that’s gone everywhere and she now knows for a fact that something is very, very wrong. “Prep an OR,” her voice surprisingly doesn’t betray the turmoil that’s churning in her stomach, instead it’s steady and calm like it is every other time a trauma case comes into the emergency room. There are voices in her ear, people telling her she can’t operate because she’s too close to this case, someone else needs to do it. Addie won’t hear it though, her brain is already working through how she’s going to fix this after one look at the mess of a wound her daughter now bears. “There’s no time.” They all know this, they have to know this, and even if there was time to sit around and twiddle their thumbs, Addison is still the best trauma surgeon in this part of Louisiana. No one else can be the one to fix her daughter, no one else would be able to save her. There’s no time. “Get her to an OR now.”

Her final word somehow sticks, because not two minutes later she’s scrubbing in, washing her hands a little too roughly to keep herself grounded. That isn’t her baby girl in there, she can’t think of Rowan that way right now and yet her mind keeps reeling over the last words she said to the woman. She’s brought back to a few days prior, the conversation they had on the phone that turned into a blow up, as they so often had been lately. It’s unacceptable, Rowan. Your being with him is unacceptable. And then she hung up, because she’s always had a flair for the dramatic and abruptly ending the call seemed like the right way to go. They’d be fine in a few days, she told herself, they’d patch things up and the elephant in the room would remain what it was until they felt the need to go back and forth about it again. She’s been trying to listen to reason lately, trying to heed her husband’s warning that if she doesn’t stop they will lose Rowan forever, but it’s not easy to just accept something she’s been fighting against for the last two decades of her life. Moving past her blatant hatred for the man who ruined her daughter’s life will take some time, but it’s time she thought they had an abundance of. Now, she’s facing the harsh reality that there may not be any time left for them at all.

It’s crushing but Addison pushes that thought down, putting her metaphorical and literal surgeon’s mask on before she enters the OR. Everyone’s staring at her, waiting for her to either break down or start calling the shots and she does the latter with ease, constantly telling herself that she is a doctor right now, not a mother. Addie works calmly and concisely, just like she had been earlier, but this is no appendectomy and Rowan — the patient — has lost a lot of blood. They’re packing the wound, Addie’s trying to find the bullet, it’s a fucking mess even if that doesn’t show on her face and it’s taking every ounce of willpower she has to keep herself from panicking. This is one of the worst gunshot wounds she’s seen, Rowan’s pneumothorax is giving her way too many difficulties as is and she’s barely made any headway in actually finding the root of the problem when a telltale beeping noise sounds rapidly through the OR. Rowan’s vitals are decreasing at an alarming rate, she’s not getting any oxygen and Addison can’t find the fucking bullet in her daughter’s lung so she can fix that.

“We’re losing her.”

The monitor goes flat immediately after those three gut wrenching words are put out into the air, and Addison feels like she is drowning, her hands suddenly still and her vision blurs. “No,” it’s guttural, said to no one in particular and she’s vaguely aware of someone moving her out of the way so Rowan can be hooked up to the defibrillator. Charge to 200. Clear. There’s a jolt but then nothing, no signs of life and Addie is blindly reaching for Rowan even if her colleagues won’t allow her to touch her. She can’t do this, she can’t lose her baby when the last words she said to her were harsh and uncaring. She can’t lose her at all. Addison would take back every horrible thing she’s ever said to her, every tear she’s ever made her daughter shed, every insult she’s ever thrown in Andrew Thane’s direction if it meant her heart would start beating again. “You are not dying today, baby, you are not dying on me.” Another charge. Another failed attempt. She needs to keep working on the lung, she needs to get in there and find the bullet and repair the damage that’s been done and they are losing precious time.

Charge. Clear. Jolt.

And finally, her heart starts beating again.

Addison can’t stop the cry of relief she lets out, she all but collapses on the ground and she might have done just that if one of her colleagues hadn’t steadied her. It’s unprofessional, she knows that, but Addie can’t bring herself to care. For three agonizing minutes, her world was shattered, her little girl was dead and Addie could do nothing but stand and watch as the attempts at revival failed. It takes a moment for her to process it, there’s a hand on her back that she wants to swat away and her hands have just stopped shaking when she moves to pick up a clamp again. “I’m fine.” She’s not fine but if she doesn’t pull herself together Rowan won’t make it and she knows that. So Addison scrounges up every ounce of strength she has left, gets back to work on the lung and finally, finally manages to find what’s keeping Rowan from breathing properly. 

Henry knew that his wife meant well. He also knew that she doesn’t want to lose Rowan just as much as him. But Addie has always been a proud and stubborn woman who would go down with a sinking ship and this happens to be hers. Henry knew from the moment that he saw Rowan’s driveway occupied by Andy’s bike, this would only mean trouble for the Fisher family. It felt like the lost years all over again were coming to swallow them like the sea and Henry certainly wasn’t ready for it. Henry sighed loudly, seeing Addie’s point but also knowing that her dramatizations didn’t ever help anything. Henry remained silent as he closed the space between the couple. “I know you think you need to keep fighting,” Henry nodded, feeling his voice return to a normal volume. The pain in Addie’s eyes made him calm down. God, he fucking hated arguing with her.

“But Rowan is thirty-seven years old, Addison. And whether we like it or not, she’s going to make her own decisions– good and fucking awful,” he explained, tracing circles on the back of her hand with his thumb. “And either way, she’s gonna do the shit we don’t like anyways, we’ve seen it first hand,” Henry continued. While Henry may not be the smarter half of the Fisher parents, he tended to be the most stable and calm when things went wrong in the family. Which was ironic since his wife was a bad ass surgeon. How the fuck she didn’t panic every time something happening in the OR, he had no idea. It seemed pretty high pressure from what he’d seen on Grey’s Anatomy and real life. “Please, just pull it back a bit. I know you’re trying to make her see the light or whatever but– just tone it down a few notches,” Henry tried, hoping that his wife would see reason in his words. He didn’t want to miss out on Rowan’s life and he’d never want to see Addie miss out on her life either. But he recognized how hard it was for Addison Fisher to give in and stop trying to control everything.

“She’s gotta stumble and fuck up on her own. And we’ll be there– to pick up the pieces or to help her when she needs it. Like last time, the fucker broke her heart before like the idiot he is but clearly, there’s something between them we don’t see, Ads,” Henry shrugged, leaning down to kiss his wife on the forehead before letting out a short laugh. While he didn’t care for Andy, he had to admit, he liked the idea of Rowan finding the person for her. He hoped like Hell that both his kids would find their very own soulmates like he had. “I mean, if you want to get technical, my parents kinda hated the idea of us being together. Thought I was getting– distracted and you were gonna get me in trouble,” Henry teased, although he also knew that he had certainly been the troublemaker of the two. She seemed to reign him in on more than one occasion. “Things turned out alright, if I do say so myself,” he teased.

It’s amazing how the moment Henry calms down, the water works retreat back into Addison’s eyeballs like they were never there to begin with. She can’t help it that she cries when she’s frustrated, and that those tears have an effect the people around her. They’re not true crocodile tears but even Addie can admit that she’s been a little dramatic about the whole thing. The thought of losing Rowan is crushing, that part is real and as painful as it could possibly be, but she realizes as Henry speaks that she might be blowing the whole thing about out of proportion. It’s true, their daughter isn’t some young, naive teenager anymore, destined to make the same mistakes as her parents. She’s a fully grown adult who knows that her actions have consequences and if she wants to go ahead and fuck up her life, then nothing Addie does will be able to stop her. It won’t keep her from trying to, of course, she’ll go down swinging if she has to. But she’s gotten the memo that she should probably lay off, at least for a little bit.

Defeated, Addie shrugs, a pout forming on her face like she’s a child. “I don’t like seeing her get hurt. I just want to prevent it, if I can.” It was the root of this, really. She’s known Andy Thane would hurt her daughter since the minute she learned they were dating and she was right. She’s always right. There’s a lot between the two of them Addie doesn’t see — clearly she’s blind to whatever Andy has that lures her daughter in — but that’s neither here nor there. Comparing Andy and Rowan to themselves is like comparing apples and oranges, but Addie can see the correlation all the same. “The difference is your parents loved me, and you weren’t a felon. We were just young and stupid.” And Rowan, as he mentioned, was now a full grown adult and Andrew Thane is in fact a felon, but she won’t bring it up again. There’s no use in it. “It did turn out alright, though, didn’t it?”

since when do you get into fights ? the question, for some reason, earns a surge of embarrassment to course through ryan. she feels as though she sparks like a live wire, emitting a chaotic sort of energy that could start a wildfire. maybe that was just it, there was a fire growing in her belly that she’s grown unaware of for so long. the thought of her mother having to witness that was enough to make her feel weak. all she’s ever done is try to please her, as well as henry. ryan does her best to collect herself, taking in a slow breath as she moves through the foyer and into the living room per addison’s demand. the couch was comfortable, familiar. that brings her back down to earth.

❛  i told you, it was a stupid fight. nothing really happened.  ❜ at first, she thinks it would be best to lie, to not drag reina’s name into the mix. knowing her mother, that would only make her more furious. but all while this is true, the idea of lying to her mother even more felt more intense than anything in that moment, so she obeys.  ❛  i accidentally bumped into reina thane and spilled water all over her. she was upset about something prior, so she took it out on me. it happens. i’m not pressing charges, i know that’s what you’re thinking.  ❜ her words are followed by a subtle shrug of her shoulders, eyes trained on the ground before they avert up towards her mother.  ❛  uh, i was icing it last night. i’ve been busy with work so i haven’t since then.  ❜

Addie’s aware that she’s being a little over the top, but she can’t help but shutter when Ryan tells her what happened. The name Reina Thane runs through her head like a nightmare, images of the brunette and Rowan together plaguing her mind. She knows Rowan is close with the other woman — though she can’t for the life of her figure out why — and she wonders if Ryan’s told Rowan yet about how her former sister-in-law decided to smash in her real sister’s face over a spilt cup of water. Addie’s not naive enough to think that will bring Rowan back over from the dark side but it doesn’t stop her from hoping so anyway. “That woman is nasty and vile. You should stay away from her, Ryan, I mean it. You should stay away from all of them. That whole family is corrupt.” She doesn’t need to remind her, Addie’s only brought up how much she hates the Thane family a million times, but she never misses an opportunity to bring it up again. 

Quickly, she gets up to grab Ryan an ice pack from the freezer, not missing a beat as she goes. “Pressing charges won’t get you anywhere, anyway. Unfortunately. You’re lucky all she did was punch you.” Ever since Reina married the son of Cronus Thane there had been millions of rumors swirling around town about just what kind of person she was, and they weren’t good. Addie’s never experienced it first hand but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t believe what people say about her. In a family like that, being above the law is common practice and Addison knows Reina Thane is no exception to that rule. Coming back from the kitchen to sit by her daughter, Addie gently presses the ice pack to her face, and she takes the opportunity to inspect the bruise further now that they’re in the privacy of her home. “Doesn’t look like she cracked anything, but she’s got a hell of an arm. Are you sure you’re okay, Ry? I’m worried about you. You should’ve just walked away.” It may not have been that simple, but Addie has to say it nonetheless. “Did you at least punch her back?”

Henry rolled his eyes at his wife. She was always one for the theatrics. If she hadn’t been so driven to be a surgeon, Henry would’ve suggested a fucking soap opera because that’s what Addie had always thought her life was.. a TV drama. While at one point, Henry had thought it was fun, even funny, this was not one of those times. “You realize you sound insane, right? — For some reason, reasons we do not need to understand, she loves them,” Henry huffed, While he didn’t like it either, it didn’t make it any less true. Clearly, they had taken care of her. They brought her into their family and they had treated her as their own. Did that make them better than Henry and Addie, because it certainly felt like it.

“Because I can see past it, I can see that my fucking daughter may end up leaving us behind yet again,” Henry insisted, knowing that if it came down to it, Rowan would do it all over again. Even with the Fisher’s begging, just as she had done before. She chose Andy over her family, it was a fact. A sad fact but it didn’t make it less true. “She loves him and we are going to end up losing her again. I’m not fucking doing that again. Even if the Thanes end up killing my ass. I’m not losing her. And I can’t stop her. Just like I can’t stop your stubborn ass,” Henry explained. At one point, Henry had been working with the Thanes but after it ended, Cronus put a hit on him and it was nearly fulfilled but here he was, alive while Cronus was dead as fuck. “I mean fuck Addie, do you want her to be gone from our lives again?”

“That right there— that’s not fucking fair. You can’t put that shit on me, Addison,” he snapped, glaring at his wife. “You can’t say shit like that.”

Addison has to physically restrain herself from gagging at the word love being used in association with her daughter and the Thane family — and Andrew specifically. After two decades, she still can’t bring herself to admit that’s what’s going on there. Lust? Maybe. An overdeveloped case of severe Stockholm syndrome? Absolutely. But Addie cannot, and will not, accept the fact that Rowan loves Andy so much that she was willing to lose her real family over it. In her mind, he was the bad guy, forcing Rowan into a situation she didn’t know how to get out of. His arrest was like a gift that brought their daughter back to them, and Addie always saw it as an out for Rowan that maybe she’d been waiting for. Now, with the prospect of Rowan going back to him after being given a chance to move on, Addie is facing the harsh reality that she wasn’t being held against her will, and that she actually wanted to be with him despite the delusions Addie made up in her head. 

In the back of her mind, Addison knows Henry’s right about all of this. The rational part of her knows that if she keeps pushing, Rowan will be gone from their life for good. And she doesn’t want that, truly she doesn’t. But after so many years of fighting it Addie doesn’t know how to sit back and allow her daughter to do the only thing she’s ever tried to deny her. “I’m sorry.” It’s overwhelming, and frustrating, and she rarely ever apologizes but it’s all she knows to say right now. Angry tears well up in her eyes and she hates it, because she knows he’ll just call her dramatic for it but she’s so tired of all of this. “Obviously, I don’t want her gone from our lives again. That’s why I’m fighting so hard, but —” she cuts herself off, not willing to voice what she’s realizing out loud. They either stand by and watch silently as she becomes a Thane again or they cut her out of their lives so they don’t have to see it happen. “Either way we lose her.”

it would have been strange if addison didn’t meddle so intensely into their lives, truth be told. or at least that’s how ryan felt. she’s grown so deeply afraid of dire change, so the idea of her mother suddenly not caring for her risky endeavors would completely derail her everyday life. it’s why she so blatantly avoided her today. though, rowan and addison’s relationship was an entirely different story. ryan was never quite sure how to go about it, especially as of recently. lately she’s obtained a confusing change of heart. ryan wanted to protect her sister from this harshness and allow her to live the life she wanted to live. they were grown adults now, this wasn’t some fleeting thing. it was an undying desire to take what’s yours and ryan can resonate with that. so, maybe she was taking rowan’s side without even knowing their argument. but this was also a newfound altercation that ryan wasn’t sure she was prepared to endure.

a quiet groan escapes her as she’s being placed into her mother’s grasp, trying to turn her head to the side so addison didn’t have to see the bruising fully. honestly, it was embarrassing. as a forty year old woman, ryan had no business getting into cat fights. yet, here she was.  ❛  nothing, mom. i got into a stupid fight during the evacuation. it was nothing, really.  ❜ her lips purse before speaking again,  ❛  i’m sorry i didn’t at least call. i didn’t — i didn’t want you to be upset. can we go inside, please ? i don’t want your nosy neighbors to see.  ❜

At Ryan’s request, Addison ushers the girl inside, but not without peeking around to see if her neighbors are actually spying on them. She wouldn’t be surprised, word travels fast around this town and people like to talk. No one seems to be watching but Addison slams the door behind them anyway for good measure, livid with the whole situation already. Ryan isn’t a fighter, she’s always been her sweet, shy girl and the thought of her getting into it with someone else makes her heart sink. She briefly wonders if it has to do with this war that’s apparently brewing in town, if Ryan somehow got in the middle of a fight between the two gangs. The thought only makes her angrier. “Since when do you get into fights? Who fought you?” Addison’s beside herself, unable to believe she hasn’t heard about this until now. Usually she’s pretty up to date with town gossip and she’s sure anyone who saw this fight is probably talking about it all over town. That’s what she gets for being a recluse lately, she supposes. 

She summons Ryan into the living room, her expressive gestures drowning out any chance her daughter might have to answer her questions immediately. “Come, sit down. We don’t have conversations in the foyer, we’re not animals. And tell me what the hell happened. Do you need ice? You look like you still need ice. Have you been icing that?”

There’s a girl. Desmond had a feeling he already knew where this was going as soon as those words came out of her mouth, even if he’d rarely ever been set up on a blind date before. It just seemed like something that would be right up Addie’s alley. “Ahh, do I know her?” he tried to stall, trying to figure out how to get out of this. He wasn’t exactly looking to go on a date at the moment. “Don’t I get any more hints?” he tried to tease a little, still hoping for a way out. But this was Addie Fisher. A way out was most likely…futile. He hesitated for a moment before affirming, “Yes, Thursday and Friday. I wouldn’t want to saddle whoever this exceptional young lady is with me as company, though.”

“Well, it’s a small town, Desmond, I’m sure you know her.” Despite the fact that Rowan was her daughter and he had to know her just because of that, she was sure the two would have crossed paths anyway. That was all she was giving him in terms of hints, though. Addie didn’t want to ruin the surprise. “Trust me, sweetheart, if anyone’s getting saddled into this it’s you. Not that she’s not lovely, I just mean she can be a bit of a piece of work.” Where Rowan got that from, Addison truly had no idea. Still, she wasn’t about to let him off the hook now that she had her claws in him, even though she hadn’t gotten a straight answer from him she was taking it as a yes. “I will set you up for Thursday, how’s that sound? Make sure you wear cologne, she likes that.”

“Let,” he mocked back. “Let her be corrupted?” He continued in disbelief. Henry and Addie had never been the type of parents to fight. Henry had the ability to sway this way or that. He was the flexible to Addie’s rigidity. Henry’s flexibility is likely what made the two as happy as they were. But now, as Henry decided to take another stance that did not align with Addie’s stubborn ways, it had caused enormous tension on their marriage. While Rowan and Andy Thane were married, Henry counted on fighting with his wife. But once they had divorced and Rowan had returned in their lives, everything seemed to go back to normal.

Andy Thane was by no means, Henry’s favorite person. In fact, he was likely his least favorite person right now because he brought fighting back to his house. And while Henry did not know Rowan’s intentions with Andy or if she was hoping to rekindle the future they had once promised each other, in front of the whole town— minus Addie Fisher— all those years ago. But this time, Henry could not just sit back and watch as his family was torn apart. It clearly hadn’t worked last time. Henry was FUCKING MISERABLE. Yes, FUCKING MISERABLE in all caps. He’d left birthday presents for Rowan on the porch, he’d left flowers for Valentine’s Day and sparklers for July 4th. All of these years had been wasted because the Fishers thought they would win. Well, they had been fucking wrong, hadn’t they.

Even when Rowan and Andy got a divorce, they hadn’t won. They hadn’t triumphed over the relationship. They had lost 8 years with their daughter, Addie had missed the opportunity to see Rowan so fucking happy on her wedding day, and they had missed time spent with Rowan and her unborn child— taken too soon. They had missed birthdays, Christmases, family dinners, and just plain ol’ talking about their fucking days. — Never again.

“You don’t command her life anymore, Addie, if you ever had,” Henry scoffed. Henry could not believe that his wife would go and piss their daughter off on Mother’s Day of all days. What the fuck was wrong with her? “It was Mother’s Day— why couldn’t you just enjoy the time you have with her?” He questioned. “Why couldn’t you leave well enough alone? Are you really going to draw this line in the sand if they— decide they want to be together?” It hurt to think about reliving the past again but if that was what Rowan wanted—

Then Henry would just have to accept it.

“I am her mother, I am allowed to tell her when I think she’s being fucking insane.” Nothing ever stopped her before and it certainly isn’t going to change now. “I don’t want to draw any lines anywhere but my God, what am I supposed to do here? Accept the fact that she’s going back into that miserable goddamn family?” It’s baffling to her that he’s not on her side for this, that he can’t see where she’s coming from. They’d lost Rowan before and as hard as it was, it was easier than watching her become something Addie never wanted to see her grow up to be. Now, with the threat of that happening again so soon after they’d gotten her back, this is the only line of defense Addie knows.

“How can you, of all people, be okay with this happening again? After what they’ve done to you?” It’s not common knowledge by any means what the Thane family had done to the Fishers, but Addie will never forget that night. It’ll be seared into her brain for the rest of her life and while Cronus Thane may be dead, she doesn’t trust that his son isn’t exactly like him. That family brought nothing but misery to the lives of many, including herself, and death followed them wherever they went. Especially now, in the midst of this turf war that seems to be going on, Addie is more terrified than ever that Rowan will get caught directly in the middle of it. “If she ends up dead because we didn’t stop this it’s on you, Henry.” It’s not fair to say, because it wouldn’t be his fault by any means, but she’s angry now and at least she’s trying to get Rowan out of that situation. Being supportive is not going to keep their daughter alive, Addie knows that much.

Rowan isn’t shocked that they are fighting, even less so that they are fighting about Andy. It feels like they have fought this topic to death even if it has been nearly eight years since they have done so. They did it enough before they went their separate ways that Rowan would love to never have to go down this road again, but she knows the only way to do that would be to cut Andy and the rest of his family out of her life permanently, something she has already accepted is never going to be an option. Moments ago Rowan had thought she was too tired to fight about this anymore. She is exhausted from the sobs that had racked her body this morning, but all of that goes out the window at Addie’s question. Now she is in full defensive mode, spine straightening and shoulders squaring, all of that tiredness having slipped away only to be replaced with irritation. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, mom.” If it had been anyone else she would have questioned whether or not she had heard them properly. She can’t imagine her father or Ryan being so bold as to ask her that in the middle of Mother’s Day brunch. But this is Addison and nothing surprises Rowan anymore, not when it comes to this. For a half second she thinks about just getting up and leaving, but she has never backed down from this fight before and she certainly isn’t going to start now. “You really wanna know?” Technically, she isn’t sleeping with Andy — they had once when she first saw him, but since then everything has been innocent. But her own feathers are so rustled by Addie’s words that she just wants to return the favour. “My sex life isn’t really any of your business. He’s been out since January, by the way.” Rowan hadn’t been keen to that information, having only found out at the beginning of April herself – but she wasn’t about to tell her mother that, either. If Addie wants to assume that Rowan has been sleeping with Andy since January and get herself worked up over nothing, that’s on her.

 A scoff rolls off of her tongue before she can stop it, head shaking as she presses her index fingers against her temples for a half second. “If you don’t want to fight why did you bring it up?” Her hands drop from her head, folding in front of her on the table top and she looks Addison in the eyes, one brow arching upward in challenge. “I get that I monumentally fucked up your life with my choices but it would be great if we could go one day — today of all days– without you finding a way to throw it in my face.”

“Language.” She clucks her tongue at the profanity, never one to miss a beat when it came up. The girls both get their mouths from their father and it’s absolutely maddening for Addison to hear it. Truthfully, she doesn’t want to know about Rowan’s sex life, has really no desire to hear what she does with that disgusting man but she asked just to prove a point. Of course Rowan doesn’t confirm but it’s all she needs to hear, and the thought of him being with her since January makes Addison want to curl up in a ball and die right there at the brunch table. She thought they were done with this, that there would be no more separation in their family but apparently, she thought wrong. Addison always worried that Andy would get out of jail and try to get Rowan back but she never thought it’d be so soon, and she hoped Rowan would have the sense not to get back involved with him. Clearly, she’d been wrong on both accounts.

Another dramatic sigh escaped her, although she knows the way this brunch is going is her own damn fault. She shouldn’t have brought it up, should’ve just let the elephant stay firmly planted in the room where it belongs, but Addie can never keep her mouth shut about things like this. She’s hardwired to always speak her opinion, no matter how it effects those around her. In this case, that isn’t a good thing. “I brought it up because if I hadn’t done it now, I know you’d be going down that rabbit hole and I don’t want that.” Truly, she doesn’t. She doesn’t want to fight with her but an even bigger part of her doesn’t want to lose her to that family again. They’ve been through it once before and the thought of Andy corrupting her again, not to mention Rhea and Reina Thane, gives her chills. “You’re doing so well, Ro. Do you really want to deal with all that... bullshit again?”

closed starter for @addiefisher

avoiding her mother on mother’s day wasn’t the smartest choice. but ryan believed that in hindsight, it could’ve been in small ways. growing up in a family fueled by a specific kind of distaste for things had instilled a particular mindset within ryan. for her mother to see her injured hand and the bruising on her cheek, that would harshly contradict this mindset. it would also bring on an unwavering amount of stress for her mother and ryan didn’t want to do that to her. she’s always been the daughter, despite her failed transgressions, to be on their side. maybe she was fearful of being ripped from their good graces. ryan had already been disappointed so severely by life, she’d hate to lose this one constant too. not to mention ryan loved her parents fiercely and endlessly, disappointing them would feel like a fatal stab to the gut.

but nonetheless, she comes over and knocks her not injured hand against the door carefully. the bruising had begun to vanish slightly, now a strange shade of yellow and blue cascading over her slightly reddened cheek. she mentally prepares for the reaction of her mother, a part of her hoping her father opens the door first to lessen the blow. but ryan wasn’t that lucky.

All day long Addison has been waiting to at least hear from Ryan, to ensure the eldest of her daughters still loves her even though she maybe meddles in their lives a little too much. Her fight with Rowan earlier in the day had left knots in her stomach and truth be told, she’s afraid Rowan has already told Ryan about it and gotten Ryan on her side. Not that there are sides, but the family ganging up on her about something silly has happened more than once in her life, and she’d prefer it not happen today of all days. Addie’s not the kind of person to admit when she’s wrong, but her fight with Rowan has her almost getting there. Mother’s day brunch, admittedly, was not the best time to bring up her daughter’s transgressions even if she thinks it’s a completely valid reason for her to be upset. Simply put, it wasn’t her finest moment, and she’s afraid Ryan will feel the same way.

All of those thoughts go out the window when she opens the front door to find Ryan herself standing there, sporting a shiner that could be seen from miles away. Any dread she has of her daughter being upset with her is quickly replaced with worry as she brings a hand to grip the woman’s jaw and softly but firmly prod at the injury. “What the hell happened to you!?” 

There were some times…when Desmond was not adept at holding his tongue. But those were usually times when he directly disagreed with something, or thought something could be improved. Thankfully, such things hadn’t particularly happened here. Desmond’s head tilted curiously to the side as Addie pulled out her phone, thought he refrained from looking at the screen— even if he was curious what she was plotting. Because that was certainly the air she was putting off…plotting. He waited patiently for her to finish her thought. She had his full attention now. “Uhh, I think so?” He was probably walking right into her trap, but Dr. Fisher was one that he’d always wanted to keep in the good graces of. “Mostly Thursday and Friday, probably.” Then he’d be able to do the grading for those days over the weekend.

“There’s a girl I know — blonde, very cute — I think you two would really hit it off. Why don’t you let me set you up?” She didn’t even wait for an answer before she was typing the dates in her calendar so she wouldn’t forget. Desmond was the perfect match for her daughter in Addison’s eyes. Tall, sweet, intellegant and most importantly, very anti-MC. “Thursday and Friday, right?” Addison knew she could be pushy, but it was part of her charm. What was the point of waiting around for things to happen when you could just make them happen yourself? Rowan certainly wasn’t taking any steps in the right direction on her own and, in her mind, a push wouldn’t ever go amiss. “I can make you a reservation if you want.”

Your dad told me he saw a bike in your driveway. “Oh?” Rowan asks, as if this is new information to her, eyebrows quirking upward for a half second. This shouldn’t be coming as a shock to her. She knows her father drives by both her and Ryan’s house regularly while he is out on patrol, and if he isn’t, he has a lower ranking officer doing it and letting him know about anything out of place. She wishes she could go back in time and tell her past self to clear a spot in the garage and make him pull it in. For a smart woman, she really could make some stupid decisions. “You’re not wasting any time today, are you?” Rowan knows that lying to her mother is a bad idea. Not only will Addie surely be able to tell, but it will just end in a fight. But then, won’t the truth end in a fight too? It isn’t as if she can just tell her what happened. I called Andy over by lying and saying I thought someone was in the backyard, then talked him into staying the night. But it’s fine, it was casual — I just told him I love him, it wasn’t a big deal. She’s pretty sure if she does that her mother’s head will do a complete 360 spin, like she’s in an exorcism movie. 

“I don’t want to fight with you, ma,” she sighs shakes her head, pushing blonde locks out of her face. “Not today, not about this.”  Regret is bubbling within her, and Rowan wishes she had just stayed in bed and let the darkness swallow her up, pull the covers over her head and just spend the afternoon thinking about the what if’s and could have been’s while having a nice, pathetic cry. She could still have that cry, she thinks. It won’t take much to set the water works off, especially not when her mother always seems so hell bent on pointing out her mistakes. Rowan loves her mother more than anything, and she is terrified of losing her one day but God, she wishes they could get through even one brunch without Addie throwing her choices in her face. 

“You know whose bike it was.” Or maybe she didn’t. Rowan supposes she could have played it off as being Blake’s bike, but then that just takes her back to square one of never being able to lie to her mother. Her jaw clenches for a half second and she sips at the water the waitress had brought out to keep herself from saying angry words she will surely regret later on. “Why don’t you just ask me what you want to know.” 

The topic of Andy Thane has always been thin ice for the two of them and clearly it still is. He’s such a poison to their relationship, and that alone is enough for Addie to resent him. She knows deep down that she’s never given him a proper chance to prove himself to her, that maybe somehow she’s missing something that Rowan sees in him, but she doubts that all the same. He’s a Thane through and through, it‘s been clear to her from the time Rowan first started seeing him and his arrest only served to prove her point even further. There’s nothing redeemable about that family, they’re all the same to Addie and she hates that her baby has been sucked into that life, barely escaping it once. If Andrew’s spending time with her again it‘s only a matter of time until she’s involved in the club again — something that Addie had fought so hard to protect both of her girls from since they were born.

“Are you sleeping with him?” Blunt as ever, Addie dives right into what she wants to know. It’d be awkward for her if she wasn’t so upset about the thought of him even stepping foot in her daughter’s home after everything he’s put her through. His going to prison may have been hard on Rowan, and she hated to see her hurting, but at least it’d kept him away from her. Now that he’s a free man Addie knew he’d try reeling her back in, just like he did every other time she thought they’d finally been free of his bullshit. “He’s been out of prison for all of what — 17 seconds?” It’s not fair of her to say, but she can’t hold back now. She’s already opened this can of worms and there’s no stopping them from spilling everywhere.

Sighing, she rubs her temples, unsure of where to go with the fact that Rowan had basically just confirmed what she was dreading to hear. Addie doesn’t want this, doesn’t feel like fighting but if she doesn’t say something now, she’s afraid Rowan will fall head first into something she won’t be able to pull herself out of. “I don’t want to fight either, Rowan, but I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to go down this path again.” It’s a path that Addie believes will only ever lead her to pain, knowing Andrew and his family, and the shit they do to feed their greed. “You know where it led you last time.” Alone with a convict ex-husband and a broken heart, and Addison can’t see that happen to her another time.

@addiefisher

Henry arrived home following an interesting conversation with Rowan about her time spent with his wife for Mother’s Day. While Addie knew that Mother’s Day was one of the hardest days of the year for Rowan, she proceeded to instigate her daughter after Henry SPECIFICALLY asked her not to. He had only informed Addie of the presence of one motorcycle, which most certainly belonged to Andy Thane. He’d seen it briefly while on patrol to his surprise which led him to casually mentioning it to his wife.

Well… that was his first fucking mistake.

Now, he bounded up the stairs, irritated because the Fishers had talked about this subject to no end… Andy fucking Thane. Henry had accepted the fact that if he wanted Rowan in his life, which he most certainly did, he had to accept the fact that Andy may or may not be in Rowan’s life and the MC would certainly be. And while that was not Henry’s favorite thing about his daughter, he refused to lose years of time with his daughter again. Addie did not see it the same way, clearly.

“Addison, I swear to fucking God, where the Hell are you?” he said, nearly tripping up the stairs as he tried to rush. “I just talked to Rowan and I cannot believe you,” he added, finally turning the corner to find his wife. “What the fuck, Addie, we talked about this,” he sighed, pinching his temples in annoyance.

Addison could hear her husband coming from a mile away, his heavy footsteps sounding as he came up the stairs, harsh words following each thud. He meant well, she knew that, but the toll this argument had taken was growing more each time they had it and she felt drained from it already. They’d never see eye to eye when it came to this, that much was clear. Henry’s willingness to let go of the whole thing was something Addie would never relate to. “Don’t swear at me.” She was already irritated from the tone of his voice, her lips pursed in annoyance. “You talked. I sat there.” 

There was a very clear picture in her mind of Henry telling her not to freak out about the fact that he’d seen Andy Thane’s bike in their daughter’s driveway, and her humming in agreement even though she knew full well she would, in fact, be freaking out. She hadn’t truly entertained the thought of letting it go then and she certainly wasn’t about to now. Losing Rowan was the worst thing to happen to her, and it had happened because of Andy. If Addison could do something to prevent that from happening again, she would, even if it upset Rowan for the time being. There was no such thing as a world where she could accept her daughter being with Andy, no matter what Henry thought, and she was simply trying to keep her from making the same mistake twice. “I will not let our daughter be corrupted by him again, Henry, I won’t.”

Book Club had always been one of Desmond favorite places. One of the most obvious reasons was that he enjoyed the books, as well as the discussion of them— but in addition to those two accolades, it was a place where people actually seemed to listen to him despite the fact that he was considerably younger than most of them. They were always willing and open to discuss whatever take he’d had on a particular book. It had been a place where he wasn’t invisible, and he still appreciated that feeling though he’d mostly grown out of the phenomenon of no one noticing him.

“Of course. You know I’d never miss your Book Clubs, Dr. Fisher.” It was a rather permanent fixture in his calendar, set to repeat on his iPhone. Desmond and his mother had always been rather close, her filling some of the gap his emotionally distant father left. But what most didn’t know was that as of late…his mother had also fallen from some of his graces, with family secrets coming to light, and the realization that his parents hadn’t only abandoned one cousin, but two. Now it was a pattern, and he was struggling to reconcile his morals with their’s. But Addie Fisher didn’t need to know that. Instead he continued to smile, trying to garner up the adoration he’d had for his mother before his disillusionment. “It’s a very important day, Dr. Fisher,” he said, a little tongue in cheek, and the smallest testing tease of how she too was a mother. He accepted the hug and kisses, used to her methods by now before assuring her. “Of course. When have you ever known me to disappoint?”

If there was one thing she loved about Desmond it was his ability to always boost her ego. The kid was always so polite and willing to feed into her absurdity that she took his generosity and ran with it nearly every time she saw him She couldn’t help it, Addison was a peacock and everyone knew it, there was no reason for her to try and hide it. And Desmond was such a good kid that she sometimes couldn’t help but take advantage of it. Like now, for instance. “Never. Which reminds me,” she started, smiling indulgently at him as she pulled out her phone to text Rowan and ask if she had plans the following week. Addison knew she’d need more convincing than just a simple text message, but she figured it didn’t hurt to get the ball rolling. Anything Addie could do to keep her away from Andrew Thane, she would, and she needed to move fast now that the other man was out of prison and apparently already preying on her daughter again. “Are you free any night this week?”

Fifteen minutes is barely a blip in the grand scheme of time, but Rowan knows that to Addison it might as well be fifteen hours and that she surely already has thousands of scenarios running through her head as to why Rowan isn’t on time. Most of them probably ending in some kind of firey car crash or a gun shot from a rival gang member – though maybe her mother is just worried that Rowan is spending time with a certain questionable person again. Rowan wouldn’t be surprised if those were the top three replaying themselves in Addison Fisher’s mind. “No, I’m okay, I promise.” Or, she is as okay as she can be, all things considered. Rowan has always been good at putting on a brave face for Addison. She had held her head high and clenched her jaw when Addison made her choose between them or Andy, hadn’t let her see how much it destroyed her when her own mother hadn’t shown up to her wedding, or how hard it was to be walking around each other on egg shells in the hospital hallways — Rowan had never once let her mother see how much it hurt her. The only time she ever let Addison see how torn up she was was when she lost Maddie. The sight of her mother clad in dirty scrubs coming into her hospital room isn’t one she will ever forget, it was the moment she finally let everything out. Addison climbing up into the hospital bed, tucking Rowan into her side and just letting her cry.

Still, she is grateful that Addison is choosing to cut her some slack. She has already cried an embarrassing amount for it not even being noon yet, she is sure any amount of criticism from her mother would only serve to send her over the ledge and that is the last thing she can handle right now. Addison’s lips pressing against her cheek have her letting out a quiet sigh of relief, the pain in her chest easing just the smallest amount. Addison has always had that effect on her, though. Always able to calm the storms in her head with just a touch — maybe finally at thirty-seven, Rowan can finally admit that sometimes she just needs her mom. But maybe not. Not when they have only been on good terms again for three years, not when she is still afraid that it is going to be snatched away from her again. Not when she is not only back on speaking terms with Andy but has told him she loves him — she knows that if she goes down that road again, her mother is going to slip right from her fingers again. 

“Like you don’t cycle through the same three orders every time we go out,” Rowan laughed quietly as she slipped into the booth across from her mother. She follows suit, though, flipping her own menu open as if she isn’t going to order the same thing she always does, too. Call her traditional, if nothing else. “Did dad make you suffer through his cooking this morning?” Henry and Addison were something Rowan has always looked up to — always wanted a love like theirs. It had broken her heart to think she had that with Andy and her parents would never be able to see that the way Andy looked at her was exactly the same way her father looked at her mother. Now it just hurt to think that maybe she had been wrong. 

One good look at Rowan and Addie can tell she’s not as okay as she claims to be. She puts up a good front, having gotten that from her, but a mother always knows. She’s been able to tell when something was up with Rowan since the day she was born, to the point that both Rowan and Ryan used to claim she was a mind reader. From a scrape on the knee she didn’t want to admit to getting when she was five, to fights with her friends at school when she was fifteen, Addison always knew. Even when they weren’t speaking, she could see the tension fill her daughter as they crossed paths in a hallway or were forced to go over a patient’s chart together. Sometimes Addie would forget they weren’t speaking, and would come so close to asking what had Rowan so stressed before she’d remember it was simply her presence that was causing the tightness in her shoulders. It was probably the thing that killed her most about that time in her life — knowing her daughter was upset and doing absolutely nothing about it.

Now, the tells are more subtle but they’re there all the same and Addison can see them loud and clear, though to anyone else they’d be microscopic. It’s in the way the tension leaves her when they embrace even if it’s only for a few seconds, in the bags under her eyes that she’s not great at hiding. Addie doesn’t blame her. It’s a hard day. A smile graces her features at her daughter’s remark and she shakes her head, though Rowan isn’t wrong. “You know me too well.” So well that it’s strange to think that wasn’t the case for nearly a decade. When she mentions her father’s cooking, Addie’s face goes sour. “He tried.” It’s all she can give on the matter without being rude. She loves her husband, she does, but the man can’t enter a kitchen without screwing something up.

The waitress comes out and she orders one of her usual three, and she knows Rowan is probably feeling smug about it. When the young girl leaves with the menus and there’s no longer a barrier between them, she takes a deep breath, giving her daughter a knowing look. She really doesn’t want to spoil their time together so early but she can’t help it, her concern outweighs everything in her telling her to be polite and at least wait until the waitress comes out with their order so they can have food in front of them to distract them from the awkwardness. But it’s been there in the back of her mind all morning and the nagging feeling won’t go away. She has to ask. “Your dad told me he saw a bike in your driveway.” She doesn’t elaborate, knowing full well Rowan will get what she means. “Something you wanna tell me?”

@addiefisher

Desmond thought he’d done a particularly good job at avoiding Addie during this special book club meeting. It was special because it was being held on Mother’s Day, and that had been made the theme of the meeting. Desmond always came to the book club, and had ever since he was somewhere around eleven years old, but today there were a few of the other kids of the members present as well.

However, it being Mother’s Day theme meant that he’d already wished many of the mother’s a happy Mother’s Day. But he hadn’t yet done so for Addie. It wasn’t that he didn’t like the woman, it was simply that…he always felt as if there was something she wanted from him, and he wasn’t entirely sure exactly what it was. But now he’d made the mistake of visiting the snack table, picking up a few little finger sandwiches. He turned to return to the group and his mother, and there she was in all her blonde confidence. The Fisher matriarch “Oh- ah- hello, Dr. Fisher.” It’s what he’d called her since his mom had first brought him to book club as a young boy, and it’s what he continued to address her as while he recovered from his surprise. “These sandwiches are delicious. Thank you for hosting, again. Especially on Mother’s day which- Happy Mother’s Day to you.”

Book club day was Addie Fisher’s favorite day, even though she knew her husband made fun of her for it. there was rarely a meeting she missed, having once even gone straight from a 16 hour surgery just to show up and talk about the latest book Oprah was reading. It was relaxing, and above it, it was an escape from the craziness that had become her everyday life. And for more than a decade, she’d gotten used to seeing Desmond at the book club meetings she held so near to her heart. 

He’d always been a small kid, a little nerdy but with a lot of heart and she’d always liked him hanging around. Now, however, he’d suddenly blossomed into a nice young man and Addison couldn’t help but think he’d be perfect for her daughter. He was a college graduate, had a good job, and he didn’t have a record which in Addie’s book made him George Clooney. “Desmond Grayson, thank you very much for coming. Although, I’ll say I’d be a little shocked if you decided not to show up today of all days.” She greeted him with her usual theatrics, a hug and a double kiss to his cheeks. With Addie, it was always a show. “I hope you did something nice for your mother today.”

@addiefisher

There are very few things Rowan hates more than being late. Mice, turning her car on to hear her favourite song ending, and green peppers all come close, but being late still tops the list. However, she has been in a funk the whole day — Mother’s Day having taken it’s toll on her before she had even managed to convince herself (after two long hours) to crawl out of bed. So she is already in a tizzy by the time she speeds into the parking lot of the restaurant, practically slamming into a waitress as she flies into the room. She gives a long winded-apology, but is already searching for Addison in the crowd of people, guilt settling into her as she finds her mother sat alone at a table surrounded by women whose children managed to actually show up on time.

“I’m sorry. It’s been — one of those days,” she apologizes making her way across the restaurant, putting on a bright smile for her mother’s sake. “Happy mother’s day.”

Tardiness has never flown well with Addison. She’d instilled the importance of being on time in her daughters from a very early age, always making sure they knew that if they’re five minutes early they’re on time and if they’re on time they’re late! It’s why she’s so concerned now, looking at the clock on her phone every 30 seconds as if that’s going to help the matter, because Rowan’s late. And Rowan, particularly, is never late. A thousand thoughts fly through Addie’s head, worst case scenarios planting themselves in the forefront of her mind until finally she spots her daughter’s familiar blonde head, rushing through the doors of the restaurant and she can finally take a breath. No one has ever claimed she’s not a worry wart.

Normally, she’d reprimand Rowan for her lateness, but today is not the day for it and Addie knows it. Mother’s day for her daughter isn’t a happy day like it is for her, it’s a day full of what could’ve been. So Addie leaves her annoyance on the table and stand up to greet her daughter with a kiss to the cheek. “Thank you, sweet pea.” She sits again, picking up the menu even though she’s already gone over it ten times. “Don’t worry about it, I was just afraid something happened. It just gave me more time to look at the menu, anyway. You know I like to be prepared.” 

Henry: SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU START IT WITHOUT ME

Henry: I'M GONNA DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE AND EAT YOUR PIE

Henry: IN FRONT OF YOU

Henry: But also, get ready for snugs!

Addison: I would never I am insulted!!!