That was total bullshit.

"Ho-ho-holy shit it's almost Christmas."

"I see that you purposely gave the gingerbread men horrified expressions. I suppose it's so we feel bad as we eat them?"

"NO DON'T FLING YOURSELF AT THE TREE THIS ISN'T ELF."

"How come you're not on top of that tree, angel~?"

"You better not pout, you better not cry, you better good I'm telling you why— the in-laws are coming make a good impression."

"I'm not saying that you can't reach the top of the tree to put on the star...but you could just ask for help."

"Did you know it's scientifically proven that Santa won't come any faster if you keep sticking your head up the chimney?"

"DON'T TOUCH THE COOKIES THEY'RE NOT READY YET!"

"So...just you and me...y'know..chillin'...totally normal except HEY THERE'S SOME MISTLETOE UP THERE WOULD YOU LOOK aT tHAT WHAT A COINCIDENCE!"

"I brought you some hot chocolate while you wait for Santa."

"What do you want for Christmas again?"

"Why does Frosty the Snowman look like a demon?"