🌻🌀Feed your mind✨🌙

I come close to choking when I think of you. I feel a steam of anger run through my body when I feel like you are moving on. I get a wave of sadness when I remind myself, that if you wanted me, you would have made it happen. I want to throw up thinking about how I actually begged someone to be with me. I’m not even desperate. I just don't think I can comprehend the fact it's not working out, I won't accept it. I love you, I really fucking love you. The moment your fingers touch any inch of my body, it’s as if fireworks are going off in my nerve endings. I truly believe our lips were made for each other. The way it feels, everything about it is right. Your eyes are the most beautiful things i’ve ever seen, they're only brown, but when I look into them it’s as if time stands still. It’s like everything is okay and everything is how it should be. I love the way you sleep talk, and how you manage to wrap your arms around me and squeeze tight as if I’m your home body. Oh, and speaking of home, that is the feeling you give me. I feel so much connection with you. I literally can't even look at you without smiling, almost like having a crush in kindergarten. Wow you just texted me, and there went not only my heart but my stomach as well. Its like a rollercoaster and I never really liked rollercoasters. I hated the feeling rollercoasters gave me, the way your stomach drops, tosses, and turns while your heart is racing, it makes me miserable. Miserable might be how I’d describe myself because you are my real life, daily rollercoaster that I'm so stuck on. Like addiction, and boy do I have an addictive personality. You know that. You know you are capable of so much, so much in fact you made me quit the most addictive thing on earth for just giving me your attention. How bout them apples? I have become so addicted to you I'm feeling lost without you. Now I know it sounds weak, but your laughter gives me life. Your smile is amazing, and honestly I'm inlove with the imperfections of you. The way you have a gap, and a birthmark on your cheek. I love your hair even when you hate it, I don't know how you could ever be disappointed while looking in the mirror cause you're always so beautiful. I love the fact you are so sensitive and so caring for people, and I love the way you have/still treat people. You are so goofy and weird and I fucking LOVE that. God, I’m so inlove with you I think I’m going mad... 

I feel like I'm drowning. You are slowly taking the life out of me. I need constant distraction, and as soon as thats over, I'm drowning all over again. Its like a never ending cycle of pain. Ive never felt so lost and so sad. I have come to the point where I wish I never met you. I know that in reality we probably aren't meant to be. I mean, if we were, wouldn't we have made it work by now? It sucks loving someone who doesn't want you back. I wouldn't wish the pain on my worst enemy. I don't know how I’ve fucked my life up so bad. I wish I knew six months ago that this is how it would have turned out...