Alhamdullilah

Ya Allah, oh how I fall into shaytan’s traps again and again....oh, how I stand with laziness in salah, oh, how I worry that my heart has become hardened by committing so many sins, oh, how I am worried about the state of my soul...wondering if at the time of death, my soul will leave my body peacefully or painfully....oh, how I pray to enter Your Jannah, despite not being worthy to rest in the peaceful abode of eternity which You will provide....oh, how I wish to rectify my sins and change my ways...oh, how I wish to become a better muslim, trying again and again to become better, while I fight against my nafs every day, oh, how I struggle with the bad habits of mine, oh, how this dunya has decieved me so much, oh, how I feel so guilty, regarding the wrongs I have done....ya Allah, oh, how I have wronged myself, oh, how I strive to become one of the righteous despite the sins which burden me, oh, how I seek Your forgiveness continuously despite always turning back to the same sins, oh, how I pray for a pure heart, a heart full of love for You, oh, how I pray for a good death and good fate, ya Allah, how I seek to be amongst those who do dhikr, oh, how I pray to recieve my book of deeds in my right hand, oh, how I pray my scale of good deeds will be heavy on the Day of Judgement, oh, how ungrateful I have been when You have given me so much, oh, how I wish to please You, oh, how I wish to be amongst those whom are beloved to You, oh, how I seek to become one of the patient, oh, how I do not wish to have the fate of the wrongdoer, the disbeliever and the hypocrite, oh, how my heart feels at ease reading Your Book, oh, how I wish to change my ways before death comes to me, oh, how I seek to be of benefit to others wherever I go, oh, how I want to leave that which is not good for me, oh, how I despair regarding my sins....but oh, how I remember that You are the Most Merciful, oh, how I feel content knowing You are always with me, oh, how far I have strayed from You, but You have always remained, oh, how I seek to better myself, better my character and better my speech, oh, how I wish to be amongst those whom You forgive, oh, how I seek to attach myself to You only, oh, how I seek to live a life which pleases You😭😭😭😭😭xx