DNA Helicase

i grasp this is all he knows and likely how most fathers were but whenever i see sentiments about "john stepping up" or putting down arguments about who jack's father is by going "john raised him, jack is his." jack's his bc he is a carbon copy of john. but jack's proclamations about john not talking to him, spending time with him, running off and making underhanded remarks about his interests suggest that john has never truly been a present parent.

John loves Jack but that doesn’t get across to Jack himself who in rdr1 says he knows John wishes he was different and “more of a man” and “more like him” to which John says thats not what he thinks at all and he never said that. And Jack says he may not of said it but thats what Jack thinks John feels. Through John’s actions thats what comes across. Jack makes several comments about how John starts teaching him one thing and then goes off somewhere leaving Jack to finish the learning all by himself.

Those aren’t the thoughts, feelings and words of a kid who had a present dad who raised him. Abigail raised Jack. She taught him what he knows, she gave him attention and love even when she was struggling. She was there from his birth all the way to her death.

John may love his son but he can’t get out of his own way to actually be there for his son.

Thats what makes rdr1 so so sad. John makes the promise that he will always be there for Jack and for once it truly genuinely seems like he’s going to stick to it. Even Jack starts believing so a little.

And then John dies.

He isn't present but a huge point of the rdr series is how these people cannot seem to survive within society and its norms. Regardless of their good intentions now, they were criminals. John was a criminal. He was a wanted man, and then is used by the law and eventually killed despite wanting to be better and live better. Is that a situation in which someone is a perfect father?

John definitely makes some questionable choices because he is struggling to do what is right (right by his family, right by his morals, right by society) and it doesn't always add up. He and Jack are very different people. But again, in rdr we see John try. We see him tell Jack "he doesn't have to do anything he doesn't want to do", tries to protect Jack by making sure that he understands the world he lives in is dangerous (which proves to be very true) because regardless of John's choices, men like agent Milton or Dutch will use whatever means to get what they want.

So no John is not an emotionally available father or the best father by any means, but a deadbeat? That's ridiculous imo.

my tag about john being a deadbeat was tongue n cheek but since we brought it up.

what else do we call a man who abandons his child and the mother of his child for a year? what do we call him when he returns and spends several more years denying that kid is his and refuses to provide for him at all? because to ME that certainly sounds like it fits your initial description of a deadbeat. we forget, john's parenting resume didn't start at the end of rdr2, it started when his kid was born and he dicked around on him for 4 years and didn't tune in until jack got kidnapped.