Jock Shane my pookie š āļø
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@a-stray-thief
Jock Shane my pookie š āļø

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laughing about the idea of shane just being fucking Over It on round 20349898 of getting asked about if he ever let ilya beat him in a game and his media coaching slipping enough for him to just deadpan, "have you heard how annoying he is when he wins? you think i would ever let that happen on purpose?"
They move in together full time and Ilya notices that Anya acts differently with Shane than she does with him, more quiet and less playful, and he worries that means she doesnāt like Shane or is jealous, so he hires a dog trainer to come over and see if thereās anything they need to do to help
After a while of talking about how Anya acts the trainer says thereās nothing to worry about, Anya likes Shane just fine, itās just that she sees him as the boss and is acting accordingly
And Ilya is like. But. Iām the one who adopted her? And raised her before Shane got here?? And the trainer is just like yeah well she sees you more like an equal. And Ilya is like WAIT she thinks Shane is in charge of both of us?? And the trainer is just like well do you interact in a way that would make her think that?
Ilyaās life flashes before his eyes as he thinks of all the times Shane has come over with a snack for Ilya and a treat for Anya, or all the times Shane has announced theyāre all going for an after dinner walk, or pets Ilyaās hair and tells him he did a good job at practice, or the fact that he uses the same warning tone with Anya when she misbehaves as he does with Ilya when heās causing problems on purpose
Shane comes home to Ilya with his face in his hands going oh god Iām not Anyaās dad Iām her brother and she thinks weāre both your pets. And Shane just goes. What.
After playing in LA, Rose takes the Cens out to party. The rookies are besides themselves, Wyatt geeks out so hard that he gets to meet more actors who play superheroes, Luca gets hit on by three different models and takes at least one of them up on it, and Ilya let's out his inner club rat and is just enjoying being in a good club. Shane goes along to spend time with Rose and make sure no one pukes in front of a camera again (looking at you, Holmberg!). Ilya, Shane and Rose end up leaving together. Theyāre all a little tipsyāthe club had good Russian vodka, so Ilya had a lot and Rose joined him to ābondā and Shane indulged in a few beers which he still doesnāt do a lot during the season even though heās more relaxed about his diet now, so theyāre all not entirely sober. Outside of the club, theyāre a little loud which draws enough attention that people recognize themāwell, letās be real, they mostly recognize Rose although someone says āisnāt that the gay baseball player from that Calvin Klein ad?ā when they see Shaneāand several people start filming. Which is of course when Roseās heel breaks and she lands ass over teakettle on the sidewalk.
Shane and Ilya are immediately concerned and Rose tries to wave them off, āmy heel just broke, guys,ā and Shane says, āyou broke your foot?ā and Rose laughs and says āno, my heelā and waves her broken shoe around, the red sole glinting in the light. āWhy are you wearing fucking low quality shoes?ā Shane asks, honestly confused, and Rose gasps, āShane, theyāre Louboutins!ā And Shane very seriously says, āwell, then Louboutins are fucking bad quality,ā which has Ilya cackling because he definitely knows Louboutins, probably even owns a pair, and knows that theyāre not low quality at all. But now thereās a video out there of Shane Hollander calling Louboutins low quality and thatās going to be a fun time on the internet. Then Shane helps Rose up and she wrinkles her nose and says, āugh I hate walking barefoot in downtown LA,ā and Ilya says, ādonāt be ridiculous, we carry you,ā and Rose is all, āoh piggy back ride,ā and Shane says, scandalized, āyouāre wearing like a miniskirt, everyone will see your ass if you do that,ā and scoops her up bridal style. And then he carries her down two blocks to the sushi restaurant they chose for a late night snack and the video of that goes even more viral than Shaneās Louboutin critique.
the way my spellcheck wants to correct shane to shame when I don't capitalize his names is giving book prologue Shane so hard

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How do you feel about people binding your fics (for personal use) (asking for myself)
Oh wow. I think people binding fics for personal use is such a huge compliment? Like? Someone likes my fic enough they want to spend time and effort and resources so they can keep it around in physical form? That's like swoon worthy.
(people who bind fics and then sell them to profit off fanfic can obviously go fuck themselves for violating fanfic code but like personal use is absolutely fine! More than fine!)
If you end up doing it and feel comfortable sharing, I'd love to see it! Even if it's just a simple folder or something. Also thank you so much for asking š
hang it in the louvre
pt 39/?
AU where Shane and Ilya don't hook up or have a decades-long secret. They don't really know each other at all, except to play each other.
Shane comes out of the closet sometime after Scott does, and in some random, lighthearted interview, they ask him what he's looking for in a man. And Shane's just, off-hand like, "Well, he'd have to have at least one Stanley Cup. Obviously." And when he gets a good reaction from that, he keeps going, like "Needs to be amazing at hockey. Definitely needs to be at least an All-Star, if not a captain. Hot too. If he can't bench-press me, I'm not interested."
And it's all in fun, except two days after the interview prints, Ilya Rozanov shows up at his door like "knock, knock. I am here to apply for boyfriend position. Do you need resume? I brought my Stanley Cup ring, just in case."
'sex scenes are gratuitous' mmhm please enjoy these complete character/narrative arcs composed exclusively of sex scenes

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People posting about the skip divorce makes me think that Scott would absolutely refuse to make it official before he retires. He cannot be the first out gay player who gets married and divorced a year later. He has to be a Role Model TM. And Kip agrees, so they pretend they're still together, and Kip has to go to the occasional game and team outing because there's only so many times he can use the grad school excuse and he begs Scott to retire, so they can stop the charade, but Scott is being stubborn and Kip is like you have enough money, your knee is fucked, coach has been scaling back your minutes, but the thing is, Scott still does love Kip and he only gets to have him, even in this weird pretend state, as long as he's still playing, and so he pushes himself for another season if even he'll definitely need a new knee once he's done playing and the Admirals are only giving him an extension because he's been the face of the franchise for fifteen years. And Kip isn't stupid, and neither is Ilya, who's haunting the Kingfisher with cryptic comments because he absolutely knows that Scott and Kip's relationship is fucked because they rushed into it and went from secret whirlwind let's move in together after a few months to the out and proud two man rainbow parade husbands way too quickly. And now Kip's in grad school, his life is entirely different, they need to recalibrate and Ilya knows what's actually going to save their relationship is Scott retiring. So ilya's got his work cut out for him but the don't call him the bisexual dairy fairy godmother of the NHL for nothing.
Post outing, during Shaneās first season with Ottawa, he meets up with Rose. The Centaurs have a game in New York and Rose has a Colbert appearance. The press immediately speculates why Ilya didnāt come with them. After all, he and Shane are married now. The more trashy outlets speculate about Shane and Rose rekindling their romance while the more serious ones (lol) write about tension between Rose and Ilya and Ilya being jealous and A Close Friend bemoans how poor Shane is in the middle of his husband and his best friend not getting along.Ā
Fast forward a couple of months, the Centaurs are playing LA. Shane is sitting out the road trip due to a minor injury. Ilya meets up with Rose at a small restaurant to avoid the press, but they get caught by paparazzi. And they get absolutely swarmed. Usually, Rose can handle a few paps going after her, but this time there are so many, they block the way from the restaurantās door to where her car is parked. Rose was just caught leaving a party hand in hand with another actor a week ago and the paps are after her like crazy and because she and Ilya were meeting on the dl she didnāt bring security. Turns out, she didnāt need to.Ā The paparazzi are in their faces, yelling at Rose about her possible relationship with her actor or whether sheās hooking up with her ex-boyfriendās husband now, shoving them around and flashing their cameras. Unfortunately for the paparazzi, none of them have a lot of experience with professional hockey players. Hockey players who can fight and are good in a scrum. So Ilya drags up his Iām gonna drop my gloves and punch out your teeth persona and yells at them loud enough that at least two of the paps drop their cameras. Even these hardened vultures donāt know what to do in the face of Russian hockey player fury. Ilya doesnāt punch any of them, but he doesnāt have to. Just wraps an arm around Rose and clears a path for her with the other, his broad shoulders and the murderous expression on his face equally well suited to get them back to Roseās car. The clip goes viral, especially because it catches Roseās absolutely vindicated expression when Ilya basically glares the last photographer out of his way, and says, just audible for the camera, ānext time we go out, we bring hockey sticks and just sweep them out of the way like ugly overgrown pucks.ā
Later that night, Rose posts a clip of her and Ilya on the ice, shooting pucks with the caption šŖ practice.
i think hayden does ads for royal match
"Shane loved it when Rozanov lost his ability to stay cool and collected. ... He loved reducing Rozanov to whimpers and Russian profanity."
Heated Rivalry, ps. 138, 153

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On ai and fanfic (fuck ai but why)
Full disclosure, Iāve been anti generative ai in fandom and all other spaces for a while now. I knew people were using it, but Iām kind of appalled how widespread it is and how āgoodā AI has become between the last time I looked and now. (Good meaning that sometimes it takes me a while to catch on, sometimes I never catch on, but the fic itself is still not what I would consider good if itās entirely written by ai.) I usually stay out of fandom discourse that makes me unhappy because fandom is my strict happy place, but AI just makes me really mad, and since the JohnDoe AI report dropped last night, I had to try to sort my feelings and get it out of my system. Something that letting AI write for you can never do for you btw. (All of this applies to AI generated art as well, but since I am a writer and not an artist, Iām writing from a writerās pov, but I think the same applies to AI generated art as well.)
I think for me, both as a writer and a reader, the question of ai use for fanfic comes down to three different questions: environmental, philosophical, and ethical. (I donāt know if those are great terms for it, but itās what came to mind and Iām not going to brainstorm with fucking Claude or chatgpt about it. If someone has ideas for better categories, lemme know!)
Environmental is the question if using ai is worth it, considering its incredibly harmful impact on our environment like the energy consumption of it, the water waste and the pollution of data centers, the enrichment of soulless tech bros who are building up the ai bubble without any kind of sustainability or accountability and just want to make money before the bubble bursts by farming any and all of our output to collect our data. Like AI in itself can be incredibly helpful, i.e. in medicine, but generative AI is not created to benefit humans. They might claim theyāre creating chatbots as research helpers and co-editors and friends (how can something that neither thinks nor feels be a friend???), but there doesnāt seem to be a single benign thought behind creating generative ai. Itās collecting data and the sycophantic nature is actively harming peopleās ability to navigate rl interactions and especially conflicts, never mind the horrific and extreme examples of encouraging suicide. Theyāve also repeatedly said thereās not enough money being made with generative AI, so theyāre pushing it harder for people and companies everywhere to use even if the benefits are limited. So no, I donāt think whatever story or picture or essay you could get out of AI is worth it for fucking our planet or our society.
All of these issues obviously pertain to all generative ai use, whereas the philosophical question for me is fandom specific. What does it mean to create fanfiction?
.....
No!*
*Yes.