◇ MICHELLE ◇
"If I knew it all then,
Would I do it again?"

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@4attagirl
◇ MICHELLE ◇
"If I knew it all then,
Would I do it again?"

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Majorly missing tbhk like nene bbg where are you how are you 🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀
Popping in every once in a while because wdym im still alive 🥀
NOOOO wtf searching up your ex online friends' accounts online has got to be one of the worst thing dawg 💔

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You know that disgust you get for yourself when you can't even keep up with the standards set for you since your childhood? Its like as if it was easy for you back then to still manage to rise to the top, but when the realization that youre no longer that "filthy smart and intelligent girl" dawns upon you, lmao I wanna kms 💔
I miss hananene COMEBACK PLEASE 🥹
Going through my blocked list seeing all of my ex online friends give me unpleasant memories bleh 💔
Bugs when you lift up a rock
More maid Jax because I love him tortured🥰

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PARALLELS
ANYONE ELSE NOTICE THE STORYBOARD SIMILARITIES?!
i just finished the ep this morning and knew i needed to make this immediately. come collect your badge guys
chat im seeing way too much hate am i the only one who genuinely loved it?
Okay so, here’s what we know so far after Tadc episode 7:
Players who get too focused on leaving the circus end up abstracting.
Caine can absolutely mess with the player’s minds
Caine intentionally targeted Jax in the most recent adventure, choosing him to distract himself in the plan.
Jax had a hallucination that looked like it almost ended in abstraction. He also had a panic attack that resulted in him pressing the Red button. The flashes in his mind were of the real world.
Caine didn’t want Kinger included in the adventure. He made a lot of references to them being close through Abel.
Caine wants all the players to stay with him and like him.
Caine’s most likely the cause of the first abstraction.
So what that leads me to believe is:
Caine targeted Jax because he’s usually the one that gets the most invested in the adventures and always enjoys them. But he suddenly wasn’t into it anymore and that worried Caine. The hallucination sequence was Caine trying to influence Jax’s mind and make him happy again but it pushed him to the brink of abstraction. That dinner was Caine probing Jax to see if what he did worked.
Every abstraction was caused by Caine. He messed with their minds as a last ditch attempt to make them happy and drove them insane,causing them to abstract.
Kinger absolutely knows how to leave the circus. Caine didn’t want him included in the adventure because he’s a Dev.
Caine probably did something to Kinger’s mind to try and erase the knowledge of the exit. But it didn’t work fully and that’s why Kinger is so lucid only in the dark. Caine tried to keep him in the dark so he wouldn’t get triggered into remembering something.
Caine went out his way to make the victory screen a bright light intentionally so Kinger couldn’t remember his ability to mess with people’s minds and the first abstraction.
Also, i know everyone is crazy about jax (im also super normal about it) but
Pomni deserves her flowers for this episode for being the adult in the room.
Firs off even after jax said some wild ass shit to her in episode 6, she sees him leave the beach. she still reaches out. Asks how hes doing like 3 times. holds out her hand. She knows they're all in this together. She's not resentful or avoiding him or excluding him cuz they need to b together in this to get through (both in the plot and just in general)
And also, shes the only one who stays level headed thoughout all of it. Granted, she's got less baggage related to the circus itself (how many things did jax do to zooble? how long has everyone been there? how many friends have they lost?). She can both affirm the need to leave from everyone, and think clearly about the whole thing. Jax calls it out immediately out of cynicism, but Pomni is always level headed about it. She notices how weird it all it and that things don't add up, and wants to get advice from the senior person in the group.
Props to Pomni
As much as I love this moment where Gangle thanks Zooble for helping her when she needed them the most, and I also love that if you look at Jax in the far right corner of the screen, you'll see him listening in on her and Zooble, and then in the following scene, you'll see that's weighing on him a lot.
And why wouldn't it? Ever since the loss of Kaufmo and Ribbit he's retreated behind a facade of malicious, sardonic, and hurtful behaviour to try to mask the pain and trauma he's experiencing, and because he believes it'll ensure he won't go through it again. As a consequence, it's driven him to disregard every opportunity to make connections with others.
Pomni came so close to helping him open up again, but instead, he chose to retreat into his facade yet again. But this time, he just can't do it. Not like last time. You'll see this throughout the episode, where the sardonic behaviour we've seen him so easily display throughout much of the series just isn't what it used to be anymore because the good times he had with Pomni reminded him of what he used to have. And that he has literally no one else except himself to blame for all of the cruelty and pushing away he's done.
It's yet another thing that makes Jax such a complex and compelling character, and I do hope he gets a chance to heal from his trauma. But I also hope he gets held accountable for the pain and hurt he's caused everyone else (especially Gangle). The hurt he's endured doesn't automatically absolve him of the hurt he's inflicted.

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“I was right?”
Episode 7 of The Amazing Digital Circus is out. Let’s talk.
In episode 6, Jax explains his worldview. “What’s the point in pretending we’re not [cartoon characters]?”
The most recent adventure just confirmed everything for him.
He clearly didn’t want to get his hopes up about leaving. After all, that’s what drives them to abstract in the first place.
He tried deflecting. Pointing out that Abel was obviously a twist villain or that the whole escape plan was meant to be one of Caine’s secret adventures. He called it. But inexplicably, he hoped that maybe there really was an exist. He hoped he was wrong.
“I can’t believe I was right!”
His belief in the possibility of an exits existence was strong enough that even he thought that his own performative disbelief of one was simply coping gone overkill. He did not want to be right.
But he wasn’t wrong.
His twisted view on their situation, his view defined completely by being a desperate coping strategy — it was just confirmed.
Because this whole plan, this situation, this escape, it was all fake. A plot. They really were just… characters in a skit.
Jax felt betrayed that everything was a lie.
Pomni said they were all real, too. Zooble said the same thing to Gangle.
So imagine his surprise when Jax, outnumbered, was right about their whole situation. Not only was the escape plan a phony, but on a basic fundamental level, his mentality — realizing that they’re all characters in the focus — is the only way.
The circus doesn’t let them escape. It doesn’t let them be real. Neither did the adventure, which rewarded playing along. Because the characters in Caine’s circus would never choose to leave.
He refused to hold Pomni’s hand, to show vulnerability or be a friend, especially after their recent fight.
This would’ve been his last act of vulnerability before coming back to the real world, had their plan been true. His last chance to be good to her before they were ripped back into the world.
They couldn’t leave, though.
He was right again. Would’ve just regretted his actions even more if he did choose to hold her hand. Because why act so serious anyway? What are they preparing for?
Nothing. So no need to abandon their established roles!
Jax never wanted to be right. He was self aware enough to know that his logic was fallible. He didn’t like his conclusion either. So when it was confirmed?
…
He was horrified when he realized he chose to stay.
While they were all trying to figure out how to make sure what the correct choice would be to allow them to leave, he forced everyone to stay. Whether it was guilt, terror, or confusion at himself, this expression shows that it wasn’t just play.
He pushed that button because he wanted to stay.
He didn’t “jokingly” choose to stay.
Wasn’t following a script or a skit.
Wasn’t just deflecting, either.
He thought that blue button would bring him home — and he refused to hit it.
Whatever was out there, he didn’t wanna go. Caine was right! He really would just rather stay in the circus.
This begs the question; what is out there?
“What’s the rush, you got someone waiting for you outside?”
“Don’t you?”
“Y-yeah…”
He asked that so flippantly. As if it’d be ridiculous to assume that someone would be out there waiting for any of than.
Maybe he’s the one who did something. Maybe he can’t face his mistake. There’s no one out there waiting for him. That’s might be the thing he really can’t face.
Or it has something to do with this. To put it bluntly: it looks like a little girls room.
Now, was it just made to match his avatar? Or was his avatar and his room meant to represent something about himself? Something he doesn’t want to share with anyone? A secret.
How bad could his secret be?
Jax deflects in the bar when he’s asked about his life, but so did Zooble.
Refused to show what happens when he holds his breathe, too, but that’s such a minor thing.
It’s clear that no one else in the circus knows. Or they do, but they’re down in the cellar.
Looks like his only friends are stuck here anyway. Why would he want to leave them?
If I had a nickel for everytime Pomni had prevented an Abstraction, I'd have two nickels.
Which isn't a lot and thank Arceus for that cause I can't handle anymore close calls