i. the sunlight feels so warm against my skin. translucent rays pour through white curtains and reveal tiny specs of dust, all floating so, so gently. unhurried. i wish to be a piece of dust with no purpose and no resolution. only wanderlust.
ii. i’ve been so tired lately. caffeine is just a word, coffee is just a drink. I stopped adding cream because it makes my stomach hurt. my head feels so dull but my heart beats just a little faster when i think about you. maybe it’s the way my yearning finds its way beyond just skin. maybe it’s the way it settles down and wants to know me more. maybe it is the caffeine.
iii. i haven’t stopped thinking about you, you know. i loved saturday mornings in bed just as much as late nights when we both couldn’t sleep. and when you grew your hair out, i liked to tuck it behind your ears. why can i still feel your warm hands around my wrists? i miss you, and i hate that i do.
iv. the clock ticks rhythmically and reminds me that time stops for no one. my mind ebbs and flows with the minute hand, steadies on the hour. it’s always like this. thoughts like tides on a beach that grow with the moon resemble your gravitational pull, and i can’t seem to find my balance.
v. i hope i run into you again. but for now, the sun sinks back down and drags with it another day. i see myself outlined in the clouds streamlining to and from no end. pink, orange, and indigo stretching across the city. in the middle of it all, my reflection glows faintly in the window until i begin to see myself again. how the sky fades to let the stars shine is my epiphany; i need to make room in my memories for something more than just nostalgia.
