update on some ππππ things
- made an A on my first honors hybrid course (evolution!!)
- made a B for the first time in my college career, but Iβm still in the chancellors list!!!
- finished with my latin language requirement!!
- made an A in chemistry AND latin!
- met goddamn penguins
- almost 10 months with an amazing man, and helping come to terms with my bisexuality
- animal crossing new horizons has been keeping me sane
- going to be applying for internships soon!! yikes!!!
- found out who my true friends are (being with the wrong friend can increase your anxiety)
- having lizzie, my adorable american short hair tabby, for 7 years!!!
if anyone saw the first version of this
no you didnβt
UPDATES
screw Bs but hey still have pretty good GPA as Iβm taking summer classes for the first time but Iβll be officially done with my undergrad aug 5 of this year!!!!!
i donβt have chemistry with orgo, but I still made out with an A. a freaking achievement tbh as one of my quizzes we had to draw mechanisms and i straight up got a 0 on it, not because I didnβt do it..but got everything wrong ahaha. k.
VOLUNTEERING AT A WILD LIFE REHAB CENTER!!!! YES ME!!
still with that same amazing man, my god. i love him.
when i come back to this blog, whatever. i never pictured myself being in this position.
(Do people still do TW??, I wonβt mention it but im full of emotions so that could be triggering?? Mentions of self worth, depression) ((will get really sappy))
i never really saw myself going anywhere further than high school when I was younger. i thought I would yenno, not good. something in me just, snapped after having constant break downs. i really wish I remembered, but all I remember was asking my mom if I could go back..and it just all started to go at a really good pace. i started to set goals for myselfβ¦one of them still holds true to this day as school being a priority. i wanted to see the finish line. Next thing I knew I was picking out colleges and actually looking at some for the first time. but I didnβt know what to major in?? all I knew was okay, I want to help animals..how? itβs hilarious to me that I picked out my major (biology) based on, βhey I really liked biology a few years ago?? mitiosis?? awesome!!and I did well on the EOC even when I missed over 10 days?? yeah letβs do that!β some advice: please please donβt do that, actually have an idea or explore! save some money and do community college too!
i didnβt let myself really, explore other subjects as much cause the things I was interested in when looking at catalogs were just high levels of biology. but I really did stick to biology all this time cause I really canβt see myself studying anything else? nothing really brings me this amount of joy class/lecture/content wise than my major classes. although I didnβt really know at the time how hard STEM was. every major has its difficulties, and some are suited for others. like personally I applaud people who major in other stem, or even humanities because thatβs not for me. but itβs still hard work.
thankfully, I had a great professor who taught an intro bio class a senior/400 level. his way of teaching basically helped me learn early on how to study and what works best for me. i can never not thank him enough for teaching that way, but my god I HATED IT AT THE TIME. but now? actually doing higher level classes like microbiology? oh my GOD one of the bests classes Iβve ever taken. and my microbiology professor admired my study habits and asked how I did this and I told him. i take pride in my notes for my STEM classes as I worked out the best way for me. but a scientist will always try to find other ways instead of one (what my microbio professor said to me) and Iβm still improving, tweaking.
did I mention Iβm in a undergrad lab too??
itβs surreal to me still, and Iβm still not processing that Iβm close. and while my GPA wasnβt as high as it used to be..I need to tell myself this but WHO CARES?!
i did it during a pandemic too, and yes I felt extremely burnt out at times, I still pushed and took breaks. actually made myself to tale breaks, but Iβm still learning to not feel guilty while doing so. I can do what I can.
props to anyone who actually read this entire mess
TLDR: undergrad is coming to an end and Iβm extremely sappy because of my past and how I grew as a person.
