Stephen Amell – My Life of Dad
AE: What are some of the core values you looked to instill in your daughter as she grows up?
SA: I just want her to be honest. There are going to be things that she is going to experience in the world today that I am not totally going to understand. I was hanging out with my buddy yesterday who has a daughter in her first year at a university. She was talking about things that were going right over my head.
So I can only imagine that five years or ten years from now kids are going to be into stuff and technology is going to be in a spot where it is going to be moving faster than I am capable of understanding. I just want her to be able to come and always talk to me and have open conversations. Just because she might get into something that I don’t approve of doesn’t mean we can’t talk about why I don’t approve. I just hope that she will view me as someone who she can trust and confide in.
AE: What was the first thing that popped into you mind when you found out you were going to be a dad?
SA: That is an interesting question. The thing that I focused more on was is my wife healthy? Is my wife happy? How is she feeling? What is she going through? I didn’t totally conceptualize the idea until my daughter was born.
Once she was born it really made life so much simpler. I say that to people and they look at me sideways because they think kids are so much work. Obviously, they are. At the same time at points in my career I feel like my priorities got out of whack. I gave credence and attention to things that didn’t necessarily need it.
Now she is my number one priority at all times. That will never change. It then becomes way easier to slot everything else where it should be in your life. My daughter first. My wife and my family second. If she hears this she would agree with me. She would say the same thing. Everything else falls where it should. Shooting arrows is important. Having a career is important. If it doesn’t fall in line with priority number on and priority number two than f*** it. I don’t care. I just say no. It just made my life a lot simpler and the path a lot clearer. My inclination to work hard becomes much easier because I know who I am working hard for.
AE: What advice do you have for new dads out there?
SA: The greatest piece of parenting advice was from my father-in-law. He looked at me one day. This was after about four bourbons. He goes, ‘Junior.’ He calls me Junior. I don’t know why. He said, ‘You get what you expect.’
I thought that was the best piece of parenting advice that I have ever gotten. You get what you expect. It is going to be a terror at a restaurant and you never bring them. They are going to be a terror. We learned with Mavi that just because you don’t get immediate results from something doesn’t mean that your kid isn’t learning. We signed with Mavi for six months before she signed back.
She got it. She was getting it. The moment she signed back for the first time I was like oh wow I don’t need instant gratification with parenting, with discipline, with lessons, with language and with new activities. Keep doing it. Keep trying. One these days your kid just gets it and it is amazing.
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