hit it until it breaks

@no4s  [continuation of this]

V laughed to himself. He did not realize that not everyone shared his parched sense of humor. It seems not everyone realized that humor of Infant Joy—a favorite of V’s when first meeting new people.

“My mistake, did you not find my joke to be tasteful. Allow me to properly introduce myself. You may call me…V. I have yet to know yours.” He leaned on his cane, easing the pressure off his leg as he wondered just who this stranger was that he was talking to. 

“ v , like , for vendetta ? “   not a joke  -  this dude is just oozing with adam driver and kylo ren vibes ;  and the disney’s  “continuation” of star wars never stuck well with vaan .    “ and ,  nah ,  don’t censor yourself .  seriously i could really care less .  that joke was just terrible. “  dismissive wave of his hand before he settles back into his anime protagonist pose :  that composed hands cradling the back of his head ,  elbows jutting out .  

“ bry ---- “  sleep - deprived ,  he feels empty in his bones .  drained .  such is an inevitability in their field of work but it is one they all take in stride .  and such is the force that pushes him up from his bed and out to the exit .   SORT OF .   as his friend intervenes unexpectedly .  a blockade of sensibility that is doing this for the preservation of his own health ,  but is it permissible when others ,  likely suffering and clinging to dear life ,  could use his aid ?   

“  bry .  i gottuh go .  “  

“ WHAT IS IT ,  GUTS  ?   why ?   is there something on my face ?  “   because the act of rejection surely has to be a physical fault that scars him like an ugly beast ,   a beast worthy of repulsion .   nothing to do with the lack of  heart that everyone   (  should  )    possess  that  shows they are capable of loving ,  caring ,   being a good person all in all .    “ is it connected to my brother ?  sister ?  tell me ,  “  despite his charm he is a husk containing a filling that slowly decays without grace .  

stone faced .  his heart is dead and stomped on the ground with some cruel to stupid things that elicit a laugh  earning him the proper term of LORD OF EDGE  which he impassively accepts because who ,  seriously ,  like genuinely deep down ,  gives a fuck the connotations with it ?  except this "attempt”  isn’t as much of a cruelty as it is sad .   and that  ...   my friends ,  is what has him laugh .  albeit a little uncomfortably which are the best kind of laughs .

nighttime bathroom breaks  usually sail by easy .  his mind too clotted with grogginess can barely catch what goes on around him ,  except this time .  he thinks it’s nothing ,  not a thing worth spending his energy on ,  until it becomes a petulant swarm  of paranoia that has his head swivel around and catch the large figure .  surprise grabs hold of his heart and his mouth hangs open ,  eyes widen .  

quick as a hair-trigger with the force of a missile that hits its mark .  he brings his hands up to cover his forehead which will surely swell ;  there already spreads red .    “  AGH HEY !  WHAT WAS THAT FOR ?!  “  

" han ,  you can't be serious . "   every fibre of his being has dreamt of doing the same things for those that have had his heart as their trophy .  to unpiece from every stress of reality and a generic life just to take a breath of clean ,  untampered with air .  

has he been so deeply buried in the soils of responsibility that he forgets that ,  when the chance stands right in front of him in the form of an extended hand ,  saying word - for - word everything his childhood has ever dreamed of ?  

his mouth parts ,  silence between his teeth .  he is thinking ,  thinking about it .  but too much is at stake for him to say yes right away .  

nothing ties him here .  he is never pliant in any restraints and like the wind , he goes where he pleases ,  breezing through lives ;  there , then gone .  nothing ties him here .   yet dean's voice catches him before he can fly away   -  out the doors that will lead him back to his throne in a castle of an aged city that run networks of people ,  gangs ,    where his word is law and what his orders  sprout to fruition in a single breath  .   dean’s words are a tether around his ankles that stops him at the entryway  ,  a hand resting at the wooden frame .  

"  there is nothing else to be said .  "  

certainty is the foundation of his voice that stabilizes his words ,  each statement spoken like a promise .  he knows what he says and will fabricate reality to fit it ;   he has that power driven by his determination .