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many women are excited to get old and weird, but i have great news that it's fully possible to become weird now, before you get old. just imagine the heights of weirdness you will be able to reach in fifty years if you get started now. that's what I think

one thing you need to know about 2014. is that what does the fox say was playing pretty much everywhere you went. and everybody was just relieved it wasn't blurred lines

I canot stress enough that those were the only 2 songs in 2014

this fuck ass kitten somehow got behind the kitchen cabinet built into the wall and INTO THE WALL . i got him out with funny toy on stick and shredded chicken but i got so scared i almost threw up and now the entire house must be babyproofed

(Out of deodorant voice) maybe we should all be more accepting of the smells our bodies naturally produce

the miserable bitch industry would crumble without me

all my haters become cicaders when i enter the summer of success

THE ROUNDNESS INCARNATE!!!

No one cared who I was until I put on the cage

have yall heard about the 17lb cannibal cat named Baby Jesus