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have yall heard about the 17lb cannibal cat named Baby Jesus

It's hilarious to me that Al Capone was an amazing tipper. I get why it took so long to catch him.

Someone let me know when OOP transitions

starts talking about my emotional state with 2 degrees of abstraction instead of 7 and the sniper across the street who i pay to keep me in line fires a warning shot thru my little hoop earring

wait can someone explain what this means to me I really want to know

if i am candid about how i feel i will die like john f kennedy

the more you listen to it, the funnier it gets

Audio: dramatic piano. The husky screams along, vaguely keeping the rhythm but not the tune

That last ROO always gets me

the honda cervix…

"family function"...? i didn't know it could do that

we all need to fuck

you tell me this the day after i trade my penis in at gamestop

damn girl your humid pussy fogged up my spectacles again

"i look forward to hearing back" implies a beautiful world that runs on sense-direction combinations. i smell sideways to tasting up. i palpate inwards to listening diagonal, so that i can hunger clockwise