𝖁𝖎𝖗𝖌𝖔

you could be washing the dishes, or messaging a friend

when all of a sudden a memory resurfaces in the front of your mind

and it overtakes you like a hurricane

with no intention of calmness, it takes everything with it

destroys every house you've built, every achievement you've accomplished

you could be doing great since the last time you broke down

since the last time grief brought you to your knees

when all of a sudden you miss your loved one so deeply, so agonizingly

no words in the world could explain the feeling

actually

grief isn't funny at all

it makes you bleed out of wounds well stitched-up

and hurts in the meanest way possible

actually

grief is obnoxious

but still want to keep as private as a lock

nobody dares to unravel me, least i'd let them they'd disappear of their own

because it has always been this way

i am the stillness that keeps peace at bay

i am the love that others lack to feel

i am the touch that is hard to maintain

and still

once i show what's beneath my surface

my heart pounds restlessly in its cage as my soul desires to spill its ink, my body feeling the most fragile it has in a while

i don't know, i think, will my words ever reach anyone? maybe the voice in my head is too quiet to scream but the volume my writings pulsate seems to be the complete opposite