⋆⭒˚skitty ⭒.⋆

As you entered the outpost, the door slammed shut abruptly, the force reverberating through the shack as the wood creaked from the impact. Panting, you both rested your hands on your knees, however, you seemed to be much more winded than he was. You briefly glanced upwards, catching the sight of his incarnadine pupils widening as he let out a breathy laugh.

A few more tedious seconds passed, the dim lantern light flickering against the wooden walls as Lohen shifted to lean back against them. This time he closely studied you, a smirk forming at his lips as he glanced at your disheveled appearance. He crossed arms, yet his expression carried a sort of weight, a strangely heavy one for someone who claimed it was just 'nothing special’. 

A faint smile tugged at his lips as he scoffed

‘... that wave of slimes was weak.’ 

Your eyes shot up, meeting his condescending gaze as you panted, your back pressing against the chipped wall.

‘Are you out of your mind?’ you managed to huff out, a little more aggressive than you would have liked.

He let out a low chuckle, uncrossing one arm as he gestured lazily towards the door.

‘Maybe. But I’m also alive, and you’re alive, so now we’ve got a story to tell over drinks later, it's simple really.’

The sheer carelessness and disregard in his voice caused you to glare at him once more. How could he be taking this so lightly? So casually? The sheer thought of his immaturity baffled you. Did he not care about your wellbeing at all? You straightened up and, not so playfully, punched his side, aiming to preserve the little dignity you had left. 

Streaks of light stretched from the broken window to meet his scuffed boots as he exaggeratedly stumbled backwards. His eyes fractionally widened, catching your fist before you could pull back. He let out a hum, a mix of acknowledgment and amusement. 

‘Hate me that much do you?’ he grinned.

Your eyes met his again, his expression only inspiring more resentment. Oh you swear you could hit him again. However, his grip remained warm and steady, hindering any movement yet not tight enough to hurt. 

‘A little gratitude wouldn't kill you, y’know.’ He shot as amusement flickered in his eyes. ‘Or at least wait until I’ve stopped bleeding before you so aggressively attack me’ He chuckled.

‘Oh you so deserve this’ You retorted dismissively. 

He snorted, releasing your hand but not before giving it a quick squeeze. 

‘Probably’ He grinned. 

A few moments passed before he pushed himself off the wall and walked past you towards the broken window, peering out the darkening sky. Shards of glass were gathered at his feet, the occasional crunch filling the air. 

‘But, we should move before more of them show up. Unless you’d rather spend the night trapped in this dusty old place.’ He stated factually, glancing around at the dilapidated state of the place, as if mentally noting not to come back. His boots absentmindedly scuffed the floor, lifting dust as it caught the evening light, casting shimmering patterns on the floor. 

‘Fine.’ You said, entirely exasperated. 

He looked back over his shoulder, the corner of his mouth lifting, and you could have sworn you almost saw something almost warm beneath his regular facade of teasing. 

‘Good choice.’ 

He gestured towards the back door with a tilt in his head.

‘I'll take point, try to keep up…. Vice Captain’s orders that is.’ He said slyly knowing how much that irritated you, considering you weren't even part of the Knights of Favonius. 

Rolling your eyes, you shifted and pushed yourself off the wall.

‘I can't believe I did this voluntarily’. You sighed while brushing off debris and dust off your clothes. 

However, before you could complain further, a soft laugh escaped him as he opened the door, 

the wind entering the outpost and rustling his dark green hair. 

‘Nobody forced you. You volunteered, remember? Saying, and I quote, ‘I need some excitement in my life’. 

He shot a sly glance over his shoulder. ‘Perhaps you should be more careful for what you wish for in the future.’ He said feigning innocence. 

Full of indignation, you caught up to his side, trailing along the uneven path while glancing at the fleeting hues of day. 

‘Never. Again.’ You said between breaths, to which he replied confidently,

‘Sure, sure. Il’l remind you of that next time a hilichurl camp needs clearing and you’re already lacing up your boots before I finish my sentence. So eager.’ He teased.

You did not even grant him the pleasure of a response as you grumbled something incoherent, a mix of frustration and exhaustion settling in. 

While moving ahead, he scanned the treeline, his voice momentarily softening as the teasing edge almost imperceptibly shifted into something along the lines of gratitude. 

‘Seriously, though. Thanks.’ 

And while you did somewhat appreciate his recognition, your body ached far too much, and you were far too annoyed to accept any form of praise. 

‘Whatever.’ you stated, keeping your gaze on the trail. 

A silence emerged as you both continued walking, becoming painfully aware of the crunch of gravel at each step. Then he glanced back, a glint in his eye.

‘You know, for someone who claims not to care, you sure follow me into a lot of danger.’ He said amusedly, shoving his hands in his pockets.

‘-more like dragged.’ You interrupted, to which he let out a short laugh. 

‘You wound me’ 

Letting out a dramatic sigh, you glared at him once more, a glare he was all too accustomed to, translating to a graceful; shut up. 

His smirk widened, but he stayed mercifully quiet for a few paces before abruptly stopping. He turned to face you, his gaze meeting yours, and while his expression was always unreadable, it became particularly hard to place in the dim moonlight. 

‘Alright, I'll drop it.’ He extended a hand. ‘Truce? At least until we reach Springvale’. 

You glanced at his outstretched hand. Of course there would be no such thing as a truce, but just as you were about to swat away his gesture and let out a snarky comment, you become aware of the wound he previously mentioned on his arm. Without treatment, the blood had managed to seep through his uniform, a sort of bitter, metallic smell radiating from it. 

‘We should get that fixed’ you stated, gesturing towards the stain. 

He blinked, glancing down at the blood-soaked bandage around his forearm that he only seemed to remember now. He dropped his arm and let out a short, dismissive breath. 

‘Right. Almost forgot about that.’ He mumbled, flexing his fingers, wincing at the pain slightly. 

‘Think we can make it to the inn before I bleed out?’ He huffed, his voice carrying a thin note of honesty beneath his regular humour. 

You glanced at him and back at the wound, weighing your options thoroughly in your head before granting a stern: ‘Sit down.’.

He sighed but complied without any argument, lowering himself onto a mossy stump near the path. You shifted and crouched down to his level, unpacking a few medical supplies you had fortunately brought with you. 

His shoulders relaxed as he watched you rummage through your pack. 

‘Never pegged you for the nurturing type-’ He said amusingly before pausing.

His voice then uncharacteristically softened ‘But, I won't pretend it's unwelcome.’ 

He offered his arm, turning the wound to face you. It was a pretty bad sight. 

Cautiously, you tended to the gash, grabbing various bottles of disinfectant and ointment, finally making sure to rebandage him. Meanwhile, he watched in silence as your fingers worked, deft and careful. As you proceeded with the steps, the sharp sting of disinfectant made his jaw tighten as you mouthed a small apology in return. When you wound the fresh bandage snug around his forearm, his breath eased out. 

‘There. Good as new’ You said with an air of pride, glancing at your craftful work. 

His voice was quieter now, almost reflective. He flexed his hand again, testing the wrap, then looked up at you. To anyone, it would have just been a regular stare, but after knowing Lohen for so long, something that resembled an odd softness caught you off guard. 

‘Hm, you’re better at this than most of our field medics… appreciate it.’ He said solemnly, pretending to be fascinated by some flakes of dirt on the ground. Nodding, you got up and packed away the equipment. He then followed suit, rising slowly and rolling his shoulders. For a moment, he seemed about to say something else, but he let it go as you stood back up and met his eyes. When you started walking again, he fell into step beside you. 

You both trudged along the path, a long stretch of quiet descending upon you as he bumped his shoulder against yours, just barely. 

‘You’re not half bad, you know’

‘Is that a compliment?’ you slightly grinned. 

He snorted, a low, genuine sound cutting through the night air.

‘Don't let it go to your head’ He glanced sideways at you, his gaze morphing into one of recognition. ‘But yeah. Take it while it's warm.’ He stated, flexing his bandaged arm once more, then added in a lighter tone. ‘Or maybe it's just the blood loss talking though, you never know.’

You knowingly rolled your eyes as the corner of his mouth pulled into a smirk. 

‘Ah, there it is. Thought you’d lost your personality for a second there.’ The corner of his mouth twitched upwards and he stretched his arms above his head. 

The outpost gates creaked ahead, shafts of light spilling from the tavern window. He slowed his pace, letting you catch up before he reached for the door handle.

‘First round’s on me. Consider it ‘professional courtesy’.’ He said smoothly to which you immediately interrupted;

‘I don't drink.’

That alone caught him off guard, more than any fight ever had. His hand froze mid-reach for the rusty handle, turning to look at you with one eyebrow arching slowly.

‘... What kind of Mondstadt citizen doesn't drink?’ He questioned. A low chuckle escaped him and he dropped his hand, shaking his head with something between disbelief and amusement. 

‘Right. So I only find out about this now huh.’ He shifted, crossing his arms. ‘Fine. Walk with me, then. There's a spot by the cliffs- a good view without alcohol.’ 

‘A walk?’ you said, surprised. It wasn't a typical activity for the battle-hungry Lohen you knew. 

He tilted his head, the tavern light faintly catching the edges of his grin. 

‘You sound suspicious’. He said while turning. 

He started walking without checking if you’d follow- a habit he’d developed from leading groups of knights. 

‘What, scared I’ll push you off?’ His voice echoed as his boots crunched the soil.

His cape fluttered behind him as he took a more narrow side path winding up towards the cliffs. Over his shoulder, he called back again:

‘Don't worry. It's far too much paperwork if you do die.’ he said half heartedly. 

How reassuring you thought. And while you initially debated on letting him walk alone, you decided against it, following him as you caught up to his side.

The path narrowed further, grass brushing against the sides of your boots. The wind picked up once more, carrying the distant cry of a night flacon. Lohen stayed quiet, matching your pace without effort, his stare fixated on grass. 

Before long, you had reached a small clearing at the top of the cliff. You gently pushed through the tall grass as you were met with the view in front of you: all of Mondstadt sprawling below you in a scattered quilt of warm lights. You could see everything from here, the various shops, the knights headquarters, even the faintly visible stained glass windows of the cathedral. And your eyes went wide because the whole world had fallen into them all at once: the streets, the smiles, the clamour of friends, the faint smell of salt mixed with smoke- 

‘Told you.’ He beamed, interrupting your overwhelming thoughts.

He stopped at the edge, his hands setting on his hips as his voice came out softer now, devoid of its usual teasing. 

‘Definitely worth the walk.’ he mumbled. 

Your gaze shifted from the silhouette of the knight to the city below, embracing the vast expanse of land and sky. All sunlight had vanished, leaving specs of stars emerging through the night, as though some kindly god had poked holes through this sheet of dark. He followed your gaze, letting the quiet settle between you like something almost familiar. 

The wind tousled a few strands of his hair as he stated:

‘It's getting dark. We should head back soon.’ 

You didn't reply, too enthralled by the sight below you. How had you never seen this until now?

He followed your enamored gaze and then paused, shoving his hands into his pockets. 

‘Unless.. you've got a thing for stumbling around in the dark… I wouldn't mind’ 

You initially didn't bother replying or glancing back up at him. Instead, you gently lowered yourself until you were sitting down on the cliff, fingers intertwining with the grass. 

‘I don't mind either," you then said, the softness in your voice catching him off guard. 

He let out a breathy laugh, the sound almost swallowed entirely by the wind.

‘Figures.’ 

A short moment passed before he too lowered himself onto the grass beside you, favoring his bandaged arm as he settled. He leaned back on his palms, his legs stretched forward as he gazed upon his beloved city, the one he tries so hard to protect. The fabric of his sleeve unintentionally brushed yours. 

‘Are you always this stubborn, or is it a special occasion?’ He questioned knowingly, unable to cope with the growing intimate atmosphere.

You were still too captivated by the view as you shrugged indifferently, continuing to gaze into the place you learned to call home. 

‘Quiet type, huh.’ 

His voice dipped lower, almost thoughtful as he pulled a blade of grass and began twirling it between his fingers. Darkness emerged gracefully as the wind began to quiet down, the pallid twilight above offering a sort of peace.

‘Silence isn't so bad. Better than listening to you talk, anyway.’ you stated absentmindedly, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. You then shifted into a more comfortable position, propping your arms up before laying down completely on the grass, gazing distantly into the sky. 

Lohen observed your movements as you lay back, amusement briefly crossing his face before he followed suit, stretching out beside you. The grass rustled under his weight and his hair splayed across the ground. 

For the first time in your unyielding friendship, his voice seemed to carry a rare unguarded weight. The kind he usually reserved for himself late at night, or simply staring into the mirror, both times intentionally alone. 

‘Sky’s good tonight. You know…’ He started, almost hesitating as he plucked more grass from beneath him. 

‘I don't usually bring people here.’ 

‘Should I be honored?’ You let out a gentle laugh as you turned to face him.

He turned his head towards you in return, a lazy smile tugging the corner of his mouth. The glow from the distant city caught the edge of his features and his pupils seem to have grown larger, unknown to you whether it was caused by the lighting or this new found depth he seemed to possess. 

‘Should you?’ He let the question hang, mocking seriousness. Then his smirk widened, fixating his gaze back onto the stars.

‘Yeah. Probably should.’  

You let out a small chuckle, almost inaudible as the silence quickly swallowed it once again. Shifting your weight, you turned to see his figure, his eyes staring solemnly into the void. 

‘How’d you discover this place?’ you questioned 

He seemed to ponder the question for a while before answering, 

‘I found it whilst exploring once, back when I had just joined the knights.’ His gaze shifted back to the city and then made its way to your eyes, as though he seemed to look through and beyond you. 

‘...been coming here alone for years. It's a good place to think… or rather not to think.’ he chuckled, the sound carrying through the breeze. 

You gently laughed in return as you looked back up at the stars.

‘Its pretty’

‘Yeah’ he said, softer than he’d intended. ‘It is.’

Silence enveloped and stretched between you both once more, the wind whispering through the grass carrying the voices of locals in the city. The shadows of trees also lingered on the ground,  casting the delicate, shifting pattern of leaves.

‘Hey.’ his voice dropped, almost cautious. 

‘Thanks for.. being here. It’s not terrible.’

You glanced at him, initially surprised by his honest acknowledgement before meeting his eyes.

‘You don't really have to thank me, Lohen. I don't mind being here. Besides, it's a nice spot.’

At your response, something flickered in his expression, gone before you could decide what it meant. Something distant, yet closer than it had ever been before. A sort of vulnerability that would have been far too quickly masked by his usual indifference, if you hadn't caught it.

‘Right.’

He held your gaze for a second longer, his eyes unintentionally tracing your features the moonlight had kindly highlighted before looking away, the breeze tousling his hair once more. 

‘Don't mind you being here either.’ he whispered, ensuring you wouldn't hear his comment as though it mattered more that he had said it to himself than to you.

He shifted once more, wincing slighting as his wounded arm made contact with the ground. 

‘S’pose I should get this properly cleaned when we head back.’ 

‘Hmm yeah’ you nodded, clearly not entirely present.

He chuckled, a low rough sound. 

‘That's it?’ ‘Hmm yeah’? Thought you’d offer to do it yourself’ He turned his head, one eyebrow raised. 

‘Your not getting cold feet are you? Or maybe you're just shy.’

The teasing edge crept back into his voice as quickly as it had previously disappeared, yet his eyes remained the same, carrying something you would maybe dare call warmth. He shifted onto the side once more, propping himself on elbow.

‘Do I look like your personal medic?’ you stated, staring blankly into his grinning eyes.

A laugh, genuine and warm, escaped him, making his shoulders shake slightly.

‘Fair point.’ He said settling back down satisfied at your retort. 

‘Guess I'll see if Barbara’s free then. Unless-’ He glanced at you sidelong, the smirk returning. ‘-you’re volunteering out of the goodness of your heart?’

You glanced at his prying figure, meeting his cat-like grin before letting out an exasperated sigh.

‘Fine.’ 

‘Knew it’ He mumbled, closing his eyes and clearly pleased with himself.

The wind picked up as the night has pursued, carrying the distant chime of the cathedral bells. Ten o’clock, yet he made no effort to stand, perfectly content, limbs splayed in the grass. 

‘Another 5 minutes, and then, maybe, we can head down’ he murmured. 

You nodded in return. 

Silence settled as his breathing evened out, deepening as the minutes passed. Clouds covered the initial appearance of the stars and the first traces of campfire smoke drifted upwards from Springvale’s direction. 

During this, his hand had almost found yours in the grass. You didn't know whether it was intentional or not, but it rested beside yours, knuckles barely brushing your pinky. 

‘Thanks.’ He repeated quieter this time.

You gently smiled as you gazed at his lying, vulnerable form, intertwining your pink with his, like a secret and a promise all at once you would try to uphold.

‘Anytime.’

His breath caught, barely audible, and for a long moment, he did not move nor speak. 

Then, his fingers curled slightly, as though the very attempt of gently hooking yours in return defied all the rules he once upheld. 

‘Gonna hold you to that.’ He murmured, voice rough with something entirely unguarded. 

Above you both, a shooting star cut across the sky, burning brightly before its light dissipated in an instant. He then stirred a minute later. Blinking against the darkening sky, his fingers lingering against yours momentarily before pulling away.

‘Duty calls.’ he said simply as he got up, offering his good hand down, his smirk returning yet softer at the edges. 

‘Coming? Or do I need to carry you too?’ he stated once more, chasing a reaction from you.

‘You’d love that’ you said while rolling your eyes at the sheer absurdity of the idea.

His grin widened, sharp and teasing ‘You have no idea.’

But he didn't push, instead he kept his hand extended, waiting with that lazy patience that implied he'd stay here all night if he had to. The wind ruffled his dark green hair, catching the last shafts of moonlight.

You then stood up, dismissing his outstretched hand, an action that spoke more of competence and than rejection. 

He watched as you shot him a playful look, clicking his tongue and pulling his hand back to brush off grass from his coat

‘Stubborn.’

The word came out warm, again almost fond if you really pried. As you brushed off some grass and dirt from your clothes, he fell into step beside you, and you both started down the familiar path towards Mondstadt’s gates.

The walk back was silent, but not awkward. You outstretched your hand, gliding across the tall grass and occasional flower. His shoulder brushed yours once too, deliberate or not, it was reassuring.

‘This is definitely the last time im following you around on your adventures’ you sighed

He snorted, low and amused.

‘You said that last time.’ He nudged your arm with his elbow. ‘And the time before that.’. 

Ahead, the city lights flickered to life, warm against the deepening black of the night sky. His steps slowed just slightly as he approached the stone gate, letting you match his pace. 

‘Besides’ he added, quieter now ‘Who else is gonna patch me up when I do something stupid?’

You glanced at him and let a gentle smile form as you bumped into his shoulder

 ‘Shut up.’ 

He stumbled half a step, catching himself with a laugh that echoed off the stone path. The sound was genuine, unfiltered in a way he rarely let show.

‘You’re getting stronger. Perhaps we should spar again’ He remarked rubbing his shoulder with mock offence.

‘Who knows, I might have to start watching my back around you.’ he said snickering at the ridiculousness of the thought that you would one day actually be stronger than he is.

Through the city gates, the evening bustle of Mondstadt greeted them: lanterns glowing, laughter spilling from the taverns and the distant strum of a lyre that came from a particular drunken bard. Buildings cornered your vision and your gaze trailed to the various closed doors and shutters. It really was late. 

At the thought, you gently yawned, covering your mouth as your eyes fluttered shut for a second. However, he had caught the gesture, a flicker of something unreadable passing through his eyes.

‘Tired?’ His voice had dropped to a testing edge settling into something a lot quieter. 

‘Mhm’ you managed to muster out, trying to maintain the speed at which he was walking.

You both soon reached the fountain plaza: halfway between the Cathedral and the Knights of Favonius headquarters. Lamplight swallowed and pooled at your feet, its edges engulfed by the surrounding shadows. You pondered the uneven steps as the growing desire for sleep gently washed over you. 

‘Come on.’ he started

‘Hm?’

He tilted his head toward the side street heading to your place. 

‘I’ll walk you back. I wouldn't want you collapsing on the cobblestone- it would be terrible for my reputation as Vice Captain.’ he mused

‘You really don't have to, it's okay’ you mumbled out, still staring intently at the cracks and faint glitter illuminated in the pavement. However, much to his content, he shook his head and kept walking, hands in his pockets and his cape swaying with every step.

‘Didn't ask if I had to.’ He glanced at you from the corner of his eye, the ghost of a smirk on his lips.

‘I'm walking you back. That's happening.’ 

Normally, you would have argued, but given your exhausted state, you saw no reason to resist; particularly because you knew all too well that saying ‘No’ to Lohen and getting him to follow through was an impossible task. You glanced to meet his gaze, harsh shadows from the lamps contouring his sharp eyes and his pupils shrinking from standing directly under it. It was moments like these that reminded you that the Lohen whom you knew all too well, was not the same Lohen that battled thousands of enemies a day to feel alive. While many assumed he was some insane, power hungry knight who had very strange tendencies to say the least, the Lohen you had gotten to know was calm, protective, and kind at times. You pondered the regular occurrences of civilians coming up to you questioning how you could ever be friends, let alone acquaintances with someone that ‘insane’. These comments always would always make your heart sink a little, often responding with phrases like: ‘he’s a lot more different than you’d think’ or ‘please don't speak of him that way’. Your thoughts trailed on, and while you thought Lohen was oblivious to the various remarks you would endure, he knew all too well what everyone thought of him, occasionally hiding behind the corner or watching from afar as people interrogated you. 

You were abruptly brought out of your thoughts as a group of drunk patrons boisterously stumbled out of the Cats Tail ahead, laughing loudly.

Lohen’s eyes widened fractionally before sidestepping them easily, his hand brushing your lower back for just a second in order to steer you clear without making a show of it. 

Only when you had become aware of what had transpired did you look up;

‘Thanks’

‘No problem’

..

As you both began walking back, he discussed the ongoing plans for the knights, making various comments about Varka’s ‘tough guy’ attitude and how he, always so ‘stoic’, was much better suited for the role of Grand Master. This made you chuckle and, while you couldn't see it in the moment, his eyes lit up every time you would laugh at his jokes and call him, and you quote, ‘terribly delusional with the stoic capacity of a teaspoon’. The chatter gradually came to an inevitable close as he stopped at the base of your house’s steps, his hands still comfortably in his pockets.

Your house was quaint and inviting, various flowers on the outside and the occasional moss or vine growing up the cracks in the wall. He let out a low whistle.

‘Been a while since I’ve been here’ as though it seemed all too familiar.

‘You were here once, Lohen.’ you chuckled 

‘Doesn’t mean I can’t miss it. I mean, you should see the state of my house compared to yours.’ 

You smiled tenderly as the street quietened. Only the distant clatter of a closing shutter could be heard somewhere down the lane.

‘Anyway, here we are.’ He looked up at your window then back at you. The smirk softened into something genuine

‘Try not to miss me too much tomorrow.’ he grinned, pausing and then shifting his weight, glancing away briefly before meeting your eyes once more. 

‘... and thanks. For tonight I mean. And the arm.’ he added.

You held his gaze and gently smiled in return, flashing him a look that said a mix of ‘don't worry’ and ‘it was nice’

‘Goodnight Lohen’ you finally spoke.  

‘Night’

He lingered a second longer than necessary, then turned away, his boots clicking against the cobblestone. Halfway down the street, he raised his bandaged arm in a lazy wave without looking back.

The moon caught his silhouette as he rounded the corner- dark green hair catching silver light, crimson eyes faintly visible, and his cape swaying with each easy stride before the shadows swallowed him whole. 

sooo it's actual ch1/8 of my fic on ao3 which you can read here:

✦ Insecure!Lohen who asks himself every night if he's good enough to be with you. Sometimes he suffers from insomnia- which he would rather die than admit- but on such sleepless nights he gets plagued by thoughts of you leaving him for someone much stronger and much more powerful than he is. In the morning he still stares at you sleeping and slowly reaches for your hand, still wondering why you would choose him of all people.

✦ Insecure!Lohen who is very self conscious. If a situation plays out during the day where he feels nervous or second guesses himself, he repeats it at least a hundred times in his head, leading to hours just blankly staring into space while you try and get his attention.

-> 'Lohen- are you okay? You've been staring at your breakfast for over 20 minutes- don't tell me my cooking is that awful.'

✦ Insecure!Lohen who feels judged when you walk down the streets of Mondstadt together. He's aware of what people think about him and, next to you, he feels as though everyone is just waiting for you to leave him for someone better. If you ever happen to notice him shying away, you make sure to squeeze his hand thrice, reminding him that no matter what, you'll aways be there for him.