XVioletCrusadeX

yes I did wash my hands to the point of my skin coming off my hands because I was scared of getting a tapeworm or I was closing and putting things neatly because I was scared that someone might trip over them, fall, and die due to the fall or injure their head permanently

I was literally scared to do any gymnastic related exercises when I was a child because I was scared I might fracture my spine and become paralyzed

I was scared to learn how to ride a bike because I thought the handlebar might go through my body when tripping over or that a car might hit me or that I'll lose my balance

I was praying to God and was scared of him putting me in hell and my loved ones too or that I'm constantly being watched

I had body-focused/related compulsions too

I was scared that I don't have enough IQ to function like a normal person would or that I have intellectual disability and that I'm too dumb to be alive, especially if I don't know something, I'm not good at something, or when it comes to fixing stuff and academia

but I grew out of some of them and they are not that obvious anymore such as unwanted thoughts, reassurance, isolating, fear related to social situations and work, spiraling, anxious-avoidant behavior in relationships, checking, sometimes it can even mimic bpd, still body related, and my undiagnosed neurodivergence makes it even worse because I constantly get the confirmation that there's something wrong with me or its symptoms contribute to even more anxious behavior and trying to overcompensate, intellectualizing emotions, existential and philosophical ocd, moral ocd, car/traffic related, identity and sexuality related, health related, especially if your body falls apart due to chronic stress and mental health, etc.

I live in constant paranoia and anxiety if I don't distract myself

the statistics don't help because I always think that someone must be in that minority/percentage and that's me

Jonathan: I know you work with Dorothy and Darius.

Camellia: