Through a Dragon's Eyes

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

Every dog has a “dog pearl”. It makes it by eating grass. When a dog dies it uses its pearl energy to manifest one wish. We don’t know what they wish for, but our thaumaturgists have traced their leylines through history. The consequences of dog wishes on the current political climate can’t be understated.

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

whatever. go my scallops

last night I had the experience of "referencing a tumblr post that you think is widely known but turns out to not be as widely known as you thought it was" last night and it was this post. whatever. go my scallops

"In the same way that your heart feels and your mind thinks, you, mortal beings, are the instrument by which the universe cares. If you choose to care, then the universe cares. If you don't, then it doesn't." -- Brennan Lee Mulligan, D20, Fantasy High

car is a sentient beast that eats dollars and can tell when you have money in your bank account

Horses are also expensive horses that love to die aren't they

Not enough people talking about how well broccoli holds a sauce