Love it when you talk that nerdy shit.

your bedsheets were wrinkled, soiled with the stench of someone who’d given up.

someone who used to smile.

someone who used to.

a quiet knock at your door, a repetitive tap in a sequence so familiar it made your heart ache.

jubilee.

why was she here?

you felt her presence against the wards you’d placed in your room, a gentle hand pressed against the invisible barrier. “we miss you,” she whispered, “dinner’s ready…um, let me know if you want anything.”

you stayed still.

tears soaked your pillow. you curled up, arms tightening around the only thing that gave you any sense of safety.

remy’s coat.

it didn’t smell like him anymore. a whisper of bourbon, that stupid cologne he always sprayed on you, a warm undertone of spices and cinnamon.

it drowned you.

the sleeves fell over your hands, the length of the coat covering your curled up body completely.

“okay,” jubilee gently patted the door, “goodnight.”

you heard her leave and pause, hesitant and worried. your fingers twitched, a ripple in your defenses. jubilee stared down at her shoes, feeling the barrier that kept her in place. she smiled, an exasperated laugh leaving her.

“change your mind?”

“how’s an—rogue?”

you didn’t recognize your own voice. hoarse, whispery, painful. jubilee walked back to your door, leaning against it. your barriers served as a gateway for your voice, gentle ripples tickling her spine.

“she’s…she’s good. i mean, she’s smiling.”

which is more than she can say for you.

“she misses you, y’know,” jubilee slid down the door, settling against it, “she always looks at that stupid polaroid of the three of you before she goes anywhere. it’s disgusting.” you barely cracked a smile when she giggled, “the three of you were so lovesick.”

were.

it was quiet, contemplative.

“jubi?”

“uh-huh?” she replied, smile on her lips as she made tiny fireworks in her palms.

“i need help,” you admitted softly, heart in your throat. the hardest part was over, the admission of needing assistance. you felt her hope through the gentle hum of your mutation, the way her heart had begun to race.

“i’m really,” you winced, “gross right now. i understand if—“

“unlock the door,” jubilee stood in an instant, “please, i’d love to help you.”

you sat up from bed, your joints and bones groaning in strain. you held remy’s coat close to you, barely catching a whisper of his scent as you crept to the door. your weak fingers twisted the lock, wood unlatching and creaking open.

you saw jubilee’s bright face, her warm eyes.

your defenses collapsed.

she embraced you in an instant, ignoring the deathly scent that encased you and the grave state of your room and health.

“i got you,” she murmured, “we’re gonna get through this, okay?”

you cried in her arms, pulling away and sniffling. jubilee followed you inside, and you watched her assess the damage. “you wanna go shower? i’ll start on your laundry,” she offered.

“okay,” you agreed, and you saw the way her eyes flicked to his coat. she smiled knowingly, “he would be proud of you for asking for help.”

jubilee stuffed clothes into the laundry basket, lifting it up with ease. she sent you a wink:

“he’d also love seeing you in his coat.”

you laughed wetly when she left to the laundry room, turning to your bathroom.

the shower greeted you with blazing water, a rain of warmth and a purging of grief. you remained in there for an hour, washing off days of neglect and open wounds.

when you emerged from the muggy bathroom, jubilee was folding clothes and packing them into drawers.

“feel better?” she asked, noting that you were still hugging remy’s coat. you nodded silently. you still felt weak, mentally and physically, but now you were clean. towel dried hair, skin dewy with moisturizer, a fresh set of pajamas on.

you looked more alive than you did an hour ago.

“jean saved us a plate,” she said, tucking a pair of sweatpants you remember wearing a month ago into the drawer, “if you don’t want to eat down there, i’ll bring it up here.”

“do you think she wants to see me?”

jubilee paused, careful.

“i think she’d love to,” she answered, walking to you with a sweet smile, “ever since you…y’know, hibernated, she was always the one that brought you stuff. cyke needed her for mission briefing so i went for her.”

“i’m glad you did.”

“yeah, me too.”

you turned around, picking up the framed photograph that you’d knocked onto the ground in a fit of grief. you traced the line of remy’s jaw, the curl of rogue’s hair.

“i wanna see her,” your voice cracked slightly, hands trembling.

“then let’s go,” jubilee set the frame aside before you dropped it, scooping your hands into hers as she guided you out. you winced at the brightness of the halls, keeping your eyes low as the doors slid open.

you frowned when the alarms began to blare.

your hands covered your ears, and you saw the solemn look on jubilee’s face.

“what’s happening?” you asked her, and she shook her head. she knew something, something she knew would ruin all the progress she’d just made.

jubilee turned to redirect your attention, to bring you up to the helipad, where she knew cable was landing.

you were gone.

queen of hearts.

you watched jubilee pull the burnt card from her pocket, handing it to rogue with worry in her eyes.

you shifted your gaze to apocalypse, his mangled corpse on full display. burnt skin, exposed bones. you faintly heard them discussing the lack of control over his horseman of death—

but all you could hear was ringing.

“…whatever’s been brought back,” rogue started slowly, “might not really be remy?”

she still held the card in her hands.

you wondered if she was thinking about the same moment you were. the three of you in the game room, you mindlessly throwing darts as remy did card tricks for rogue.

“look at ‘dat, chère,” he mused, accent thick, “‘s missin’.”

“you took it out the deck and hid it!”

“mm, not quite,” remy pointed at you, a soft brush of kinetic energy making you flinch and jerk towards them. “check our lady’s sleeve.”

rogue reached over, gloved fingers pulling you into her lap. you sat there, pliant and flustered as she pulled up your sleeve. two copies of the queen of hearts fell from the fabric, and remy grinned arrogantly.

“two cards for my two queens.”

you followed behind rogue and nightcrawler, frowning at the way she was pacing in distress.

“remy’s alive and he’s killed apocalypse,” she ran her hands through her hair, “what am i ‘pposed to do? what if this plan ain’t work?”

kurt reached for her, gently holding her shoulders, “it will work, sister. if it does not, then all will still be okay.” you watched as they hugged, peering down at your translucent hands. “i’m just worried sick about her,” rogue said, her voice watery and pitched, “she’s up there alone, tryin’ to get through somethin’ so heavy by herself.”

you parted your lips, closing them shortly after.

you quietly sat on the nearby wall, one that overlooked the sand and the waters. your figure became visible beneath the moonlight. it was always easier to show up silently than it was to announce your arrival.

remy always did that part.

“sugar?” you heard her barely say, her voice awed and shaky. a few hushed words and you felt the soft puff of kurt disappearing, the gravel crunched beneath her shoes as she neared you.

you couldn’t look at her.

she sat next to you, warmth radiating off her. it was tempting, the urge to just fall into her body and let her hold you a while.

“i’m not mad at you, honey,” she whispered, fingers pressing gently against your jaw to turn your head to her.

“i left you,” you wept, “i’m sorry.”

“you didn’t leave me,” rogue brought you into her loving embrace, “you didn’t do anythin’ wrong, ‘kay? ‘cept not take care of yourself, that you did wrong.” you curled into her chest, arms wrapping around her waist. her hands caressed you, comforting and so so warm.

rogue really didn’t want to acknowledge it, but she knew she had to.

“do you know?”

you nodded, shaky and sad.

“he’s comin’, sugar,” she cradled your face, lips gently pressing against your skin. she barely felt the chilly hum of your shield, grateful that she could touch you like this. “we gotta go,” rogue pulled back, eyes dipping to your lips.

“will you kiss me, annie? please?” you whispered, hands greedily gripping the front of her shirt. you didn’t feel worthy enough to ask, but you’d spill blood for the sweetness of her laughter if it gave you the chance to feel her kiss you again.

she smiled, devastating and smitten.

“‘course i will, sugar. never gotta ask.”

your lips met in a sweet and solemn dance, a release of emotions you hadn’t quite had since he died.

“let’s go get our remy, yeah?” she swept you up, effortlessly carrying you and flying up to the helipad. she landed softly, placing you down. you saw them all staring at you, and you felt the thrum of your mutation coat your skin. rogue still held your hand, and you knew neither her nor you would want to let go.

scott nodded once, pleased.

the aircraft was boarded, the plan was set.

remy lebeau was alive.

alive and on a mission.

his gray skin shifted where his lips curled into a grin, wind blowing his pale hair as he and his warped comrades neared the aircraft.

you stared down at the yellow scanner, watching the line swirl in repetitive circles.

“rogue, is null here?” cyclops asked, spine straight as he examined the space next to her. she nodded, feeling the way you squeezed her hand. “the two of you need to separate.”

you saw rogue’s eyes narrow in clear disdain.

“it is logical,” psylocke said calmly, “you will become distracted in your task if you are concerned about her.”

“or worse, if he sees her,” jean averted her eyes.

before rogue could protest, you appeared.

you did your best to ignore the pitiful stares, the eyes that widened in awe. you kissed her cheek and stepped away, disappearing before she could grab you again. she glared at scott, who simply looked away. he didn’t like it either.

the sensor began to beep rapidly.

“i sense no mech sentinel pilots outside,” psylocke’s hands neared her head, the reflection of a purple butterfly emerging, “but i do sense—“

“a swarm of black holes where minds and souls should be,” jean paled, and a sudden explosion racked the aircraft. you instinctively wanted to run to rogue, to grab her and stay with her, but you couldn’t.

she had a job, and you couldn’t get in the way.

lightning crackled outside as purple blasts of kinetic energy tore apart the ship’s defenses. you peeked outside the windows, spotting familiar faces on glowing motorcycles.

“okay, that’s cool,” you muttered, flinching when a nearby air vent was kicked open. bella donna and robert crawled inside, their faces blank and eyes bright red.

“find gambit, now!”

you ran from the main room, ducking into the cargo space. the end of the area was blown off, leaving a window for an open, black sky. you tensed when the door hissed open, revealing rogue in a frantic state. you sighed, so much for staying separate.

“remy? it’s me,” she shouted, her voice echoing over the whipping winds, “it’s rogue!”

you hid near the wall, a translucent barrier preventing you from flying into the night. you caught a glimpse of his coat, a barely noticeable shadow running along the boxes. “apocalypse poisoned y’mind—i can help you,” she pleaded, and you watched her glove get carried away by the wind.

“trust me.”

you felt tears well in your eyes when you seen his form behind her. the shape of his coat—the same coat that laid safely on your bed at home—the lines of his side profile, the heaviness of his footsteps.

“y’know,” he drawled, deep and utterly familiar, “life does flash before our eyes when we die.”

you crept closer.

you froze in your spot when he came into the light, red irises glowing in the shadows. white hair emerged from the darkness, a grayscale of the man who used to be so colorful.

“and when i died…”

tears fell down rogue’s cheeks.

“all i saw…was you,” he paused, eyes flicking to where you were crouched, “and her.” you felt your heart race, how did he know? he stood directly in front of a seemingly enchanted rogue, head still turned in your direction. you bit your lip when her hand pressed against his face, pushing his body against the crate.

nothing.

your eyes widened when his hand reached up to touch hers, “what’s wrong?”

“that ain’t…possible,” rogue tensed when his hand slid to her wrist, gently yanking her towards him. he smiled serenely:

“warned ya, chère. some things? they be deeper than skin.”

his index lifted, a puff of purple energy coiled at the tip of it. your hand lifted, and he frowned at the sudden resistance.

“don’t move,” he whispered to rogue, releasing her wrist before turning your direction, “our girl’s rearin’ for me t’catch her.” he may not have been able to touch her face, but his energy locked her place via her legs. “sugar, get out!” she yelled, doing her best to get free.

you remained invisible as you aimed for the door, but it was too late. he had you.

“hard not t’hear a heart ‘dat beats f’me,” he mused, hands sliding around your waist, “hm, mon ami?” remy admired the teary look in your eyes when your body became visible. he lifted a hand, and you tried to fight against him when his finger pressed against your forehead.

“sleep.”

rogue watched helplessly as you fell into his arms. normally, the sight would make butterflies bloom in her stomach, but all she felt right now was fear.

he approached her, tilting his head down at you in a quick motion, “ain’t she sweet?”

he gently shifted your weight, his now free hand lifting to rogue’s face. he caressed her cheek before whispering the same command he gave you, a dot of kinetic energy infiltrating her mind.

he caught her, easily tossing her sleeping form over his shoulder.

remy placed the two of you on the bike with the care of a man who wasn’t death himself, smiling fondly:

“two of a kind.”

it was warm when you stirred awake.

you pushed yourself up, the plush mattress dipping beneath your weight. rogue laid next to you, a blanket draped over the two of you.

“annie,” you whispered, gently shaking her, “annie, wake up—“

“let her rest, chère.”

you flinched, head jerking towards the entry of the room. remy stood there, leaned against the doorframe like he hadn’t just kidnapped two x-men.

“remy…”

“mhm,” he hummed, like he’d just tasted something delicious, “missed ‘dat.” he walked inside, nearing you. he smiled playfully when you cloaked, watching the indentation of your body on the mattress shift.

he stood still.

you were directly in front of him, eyes examining him so closely. he could feel the shift in the air, hear the thrum of the shields you kept up.

his head tilted when you tried to sneak by.

he followed you out the door, smiling when your footsteps began to pick up. he quietly closed the door behind him, getting one last fond look at rogue’s sleeping face before heading after you.

remy walked through the corridors, unhurried and unbothered.

you dipped inside one of the rooms after doubling back, knees tucking into your chest and covering your mouth as he whistled lowly, “y’know, coulda swore y’missed me.”

i did.

you stared with horror as his red irises peered inside the room you were hiding in, the outside light bleeding in as he pushed the door open.

“gambit ain’t feelin’ real loved, chère.”

remy knelt in front of you, his hands landing firmly on your knees.

“let me see ‘dat pretty face o’yours.”

you uncloaked, gradual and slow. he smiled warmly, thumbs brushing over your pajama pants. you hadn’t changed earlier, not having the time to throw on any battle appropriate clothes.

“tu es belle,” he whispered, awed and enchanted, “gambit missed you, mon coeur.”

you tentatively raised your hands, fingertips barely grazing his face before you got nervous. you tried to pull them back to you, but he caught your wrists before you could.

he raised your hands, eager yet still giving you the chance to say no.

“are you our remy?”

“‘course i am,” he mused, “always been your remy.” you pressed your trembling lips together, and his eyes softened at the sight of your emotions. you launched into his arms, sobbing as he held you.

“shh, shh,” he soothed, “it okay, chère. gambit okay.”

he pressed his lips to your hair, his hand lifting to run through the strands, “not lettin’ you go again. neither of ya.” he smiled as he slowly moved to stand, you in his arms.

“wanna help me make dinner? y’favorite?”

you nodded.

you knew in your mind that this wasn’t gambit, that this wasn’t the remy you laid to rest.

but he smelled like him, he felt like him—

he held you like him.

remy kissed your forehead, carrying you down to the kitchen. your eyes widened when you seen kurt, his usually golden eyes pure crimson.

“kurt—?”

“ignore him,” remy easily smiled, “focus on me.”

you watched over his shoulder as kurt went upstairs, and remy sat you on the counter. he stood between your knees, hand lifting to brush fondly against your cheek, “sois sage.”

you observed as remy cooked and set the table, porcelain plates floating into the next room. your meek offer to help made him give you a look. as the stove clicked and the spice bottles returned to the cabinet, you thought about rogue.

“annie will wonder where i’m at,” you whispered as he scooped a golden crusted batch of fried chicken from the oil. “ya wanna go get her? dinner’s bout done,” he asked, toweling off his hands. as you went to get down, you felt the soft buzz of his kinetic energy circle your waist and lower you off the counter.

“careful on ‘dem stairs.”

you nodded once, rushing off to get her.

kurt stood next to the bedroom door, and you could only smile weakly as you pushed inside. rogue was in the process sitting up, her eyes frantic as she scanned the bed.

“annie?” you called, closing the door behind you as you went to her. you crawled on the bed with her, and she easily recepted you. she held you on her lap, worriedly examining you.

“are ya alright? where’d you go?”

“i woke up before you, remy…um, he came and got me,” you explained, “told me not to wake you up. i hid for a little…”

“but he found ya,” she finished, frowning as she kissed your cheek, “where’s he at now?”

the door creaked open on cue, kurt stepping inside cradling a candle, “time to rise, sister. dinner is served, and you are the guests of honor.” he smiled, hollow and blank. you hugged rogue’s neck as she stared at him with sadness, “kurt? what’s he done to you?”

he didn’t answer, simply gesturing to the dark corridor.

you slid off rogue’s lap, cloaking and holding her hand as she followed kurt to the dining room. “don’t let go o’me if i can’t see ya,” she murmured, and you squeezed her hand in response. she peeked around the doorframe to the dining room, spotting remy pouring out flutes of champagne. an eerie record of old music spun under the needle, the fireplace casting a warm glow over the room.

it would be romantic if remy wasn’t a living corpse.

“evenin’, chère,” he cautiously tilted the glass of champagne as greeting. his name left your lips, “did she get lost?” you uncloaked briefly, barely visible from where rogue had tucked you behind her.

“mm, shy thing,” he mused, devastatingly adoring and loving. remy rounded the table, pulling out one chair first. you nudged rogue forward, and she hesitantly let go of you to go sit. once rogue was settled, remy moved to the seat across from her.

you quietly moved to the seat, sitting down as he pushed your chair in. his hands draped over your shoulders for a moment, leaving a loving squeeze as he took his own seat.

“siccing your brainwashed ex on your ladies is a mighty bold way of asking us out to dinner,” rogue muttered, concealing the joy in her eyes at the fried chicken revealed on the platter.

remy chuckled, “two a’ya always did like my unorthodox flair.”

he lifted his flute of champagne. rogue lifted hers to his, and you raised yours. the three glasses clinked together, but only remy drank right away. the silence lingered, the only sound the soft crackle of the fireplace and the whoosh of the candle flames.

you hadn’t touched your plate.

“eat, chère,” remy reached over, gently pushing your plate closer, “y’love fried chicken ‘n collard greens.”

rogue watched as you uncloaked, lifting your fork to tear open the meat and collect the greens.

remy’s lips quirked into a smirk:

“you’ll need the energy for later.”

when you’d started to eat enough for his satisfaction, he lowered his fork as he finished a bite, “gambit never would’ve dreamed you’d be workin’ the merc huntin’ me down.”

“cable?” your brows knit together, his eyes barely shifting to you before locking on rogue. “no, remy, we were tryin’ to save you,” she turned away, ashamed, “i…i thought i could.” you watched her sadly, and your mind could only think of how pretty she looked. highlighted by the fire burning behind her, the sparkle in her eyes.

you went to lower your fork, but a flick of remy’s fingers made you stop. he shook his head, nodding to your plate.

“world’s been conspirin’ to keep us apart for so long, chère,” remy sounded contemplative, almost angry, “we both learned to expect the worst.” you wanted to contribute, to be involved somehow—but this was beyond you.

these were things you’d missed because you’d locked yourself away instead of facing them.

remy slid from his seat, kneeling next to rogue’s seat. he took her hand, peering up at her with those haunting eyes of his, “but now? now, we’ve been dealt a whole new hand.” you stared at your plate, eyes glossing over.

“the gap between the man i was and the one you want is finally gone.”

his thumb traced over her cheek, shifting to the opposite side to direct her gaze to him. he guided her eyes to you, his own staring at you as well, “the man you want me to be for her.”

“or,” he said, amused and encouraging, “atleast, it can be.”

you cloaked out of sheer discomfort due to the suffocating tension, noting the way remy frowned and how rogue’s eyes immediately flicked to you. you were so unsure how to feel. this wasn’t remy, but it was. this remy wanted to be better for the two of you, he wanted to be the man rogue wanted him to be.

“this is just…so strange,” she muttered, standing from her chair and nearing the fireplace, “gettin’ you back is all we ever dreamed of. but now, you’re here—and i don’t know if i should be relieved or scared.”

remy tracked her movements with his eyes, standing and facing where you sat. he crooked a finger, smiling faintly when your chair squeaked. he felt you pass him, and rogue didn’t flinch when your arms curled around her.

“i ain’t crawled outta my grave to repeat regrets,” remy’s eyes stared into your soul, “this is our second chance.” your power flickered, and rogue felt your grip loosen, “no more holdin’ my cards close to my chest. so, here they are, belles.”

remy leaned over the fireplace, unbothered by the ashes that sparked near him. you, however, were irritated with how close the hem of his coat was coming to the fire.

he smiled mid story upon feeling the chill of your shield emerge between him and the fire—

“…locals know her as the x-ternal.”

remy turned, his easy going smile gone and his eyes serious. you tried to back up, to retreat around the table, but with a casual shift of his knuckles, you were pinned. rogue watched warily as he neared:

“her relic will make you immortal like me.”

he walked towards you—his loves, his queens.

“it’ll bind us together forever…husband and wives.”

rogue looked down at you, and in a blink, remy was right next to her. his crimson irises scanned the two of you, hands lifting to hover on either side of your waists.

“and then nothin’—not even death—ever keep us apart again.”

your teary eyes, exhausted and nearly dull, met his excited ones, “nothing? you promise?” remy smiled comfortingly, hand rising to cradle your face. he swept a thumb over your tears, leaning forward to kiss your forehead, “i promise, mon coeur.”

“how do we know we can trust you?”

“cause i’m offerin’ us a second chance,” remy reached for rogue, lovingly tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, “you gotta believe in me—believe in us, chère.” his hand cupped her jaw, thumb brushing along her bottom lip.

you watched rogue’s face shift with acceptance, and she closed her eyes as remy lowered his lips to hers. you tried to step back, to give them their moment, but they both tightened their hold on you.

“want some sugar, too?” remy asked teasingly, “ought not to stay too long. bad luck seein’ mes dames before our weddin’, non?”

he kissed you sweetly, and you could faintly taste rogue’s lip balm as he pulled away. his tongue barely ran along his lips, savoring the flavor of the two of you before winking.

“get dolled up f’me, yeah? gots us a weddin’ to be had,” his eyes fell to your pajamas, a playful grin on his lips, “though, i ain’t mind ‘dem jammies.”

as you and rogue returned upstairs in hope of finding something to wear—fret not, remy already knew his ladies would need beautiful fabrics to don—remy sat down at the head of the table.

he reached in his pocket, tugging out three rings.

kurt appeared in the room, taking the rings to the makeshift venue.

remy could only grin, crimson irises sparking with something sinister, desperate, obsessive, and something that looked awfully like love.