-Wilfre-Medic-

(No.

Im not doing alright.

Far from it really.

Ive tried to end my life at least three different times since starting college.

Ran away a few times.

I have lost another friend just last week to suicide.

I have been struggling to do anything, and stay in bed rotting most of the time.

All my dreams are just bad memories or nightmares.

Im always exhausted and im always crying it feels.

I am barely eating, yet still don't feel hungry, despite how much I skip meals lately.

I haven't gone to many classes, yet no one has actually noticed.

Before then, I was on the path of failing, and so early in the semester too.

I get scared of taking my medications for I worry I will follow my friend in the same path as they did, by overdosing, even though I really want the pain to end.

Ive been hurting myself more and more lately, specifically with the blade my dear past boyfriend gave me.

I cant help myself, and zone out every time I do it.

I really want to feel the physical pain in a way to cover up mental and emotional pain.

People keep calling me different slurs.

Ive been grabbed by different people as well in ways I dont want to talk about.

I miss everyone I lost so much it gives me physical pain.

The people that I thought I could trust hurt me, left me because I am struggling.

I can't go back to my family, I won't feel any better or safer there.

I literally have no one to really go to for help.

No one has really checked in on me.

This is the first in a while, actually.

Ive just been alone in my room, barely doing anything.

I think I'm giving up, to be honest.

I want it to end.

I can't stand living anymore.

Im losing hope.

Im losing my will to live.

I want to be with those I have lost so badly.

I want to give up.

It hurts so much.

It hurts.