Black Void Rises, The Day Begins.

wish there was a source for this!

why is everything a dead wife to you people.

my dead skateboarding cousin

Memento Throckmori

raising my son on a strict media diet of Portal, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and Mythbusters in an attempt to resurrect the extinct species Pre-Gamergate Smug Nerd Boy

update: daughter

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

Not enough vape shops

that puppyplay "and i, what, fuck the dog?" post is how i think of most kink. like shes tied up hangin from the ceiling and now i just sit down and get some reading done? like what is the "and then" for half of these

the fanned fiction term "lemon" comes from the fact that the first pornograpgical fanfics were of John Lemon of beatles fame

every couple months dunky donuts grows a new pop singer woman in a vat to release a promotional drink for

you’re jerking off and suddenly my leitmotif starts playing