trying on a metaphor
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@whitepossumscream
I’ve been gone for quite a long time. If I’m going to be honest I really don’t know for sure exactly how long its been, I know at least two years since I really posted.
But here I am again, hello old friend. So let’s start over from scratch Call me possum that’s really all you need to know isn’t it?
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I wish I would have been told.
When I started the fire department I filled out a single page application and a few days later I was issued a pager and turn outs and told that when the pager went off to show up where the voices told us to go and someone would tell me what to do when I got there.
At the bottom of that paper there was no disclaimer or warning about the things that I would have to be part of, that I would have to see, the things I could never forget, the smells and sounds. No one ever told me when they issued my pager that the voices that come across the little black box would freeze me in my tracks and send cold chills down my spine. I never got the crash course on what it was like to wash blood out of your turn outs, your blood, a patients, or worse one of the guys on your crew. I never got told that one day I would be sitting on the side of the road alone with two critical patients trying to keep them both alive until EMS arrived. I never got told about how the world stops turning when you lose a patient how isolated you feel, I never got told that my family and friends wouldn’t be able to really understand what its like or the semi blank expressions on their faces as the scramble in their own heads to come up with something to say. I never was told that one day I’d have to hold back a screaming mother to keep her from seeing her sons broken body being loaded into the helicopter only to have the crew report he didn’t make it on the way to the hospital. I wish that I had would have been told about the anger that would boil inside of me after working a patient all the way to the hospital just to come into the ER and have the doctor call it without even trying.
I wish someone would have told me that I’d find myself crying in the dark by myself because I almost didn’t make it home this time, or that I would sob in church thanking God for sparing me with burned turn out gear in my trunk knowing that me and every person on my crew shouldn’t have walked away from the last run let alone come back completely un-injured. No one told me about all the pulled muscles, cuts, scrapes, and bruises or that I would carry more scars on my body than I thought possible. I wish that someone would have told me all these things, told me that the fire service would take and take and take from me without mercy as long as I allowed it to. That it in itself is addictive and habit forming and if you don’t pay attention before you it will consume you completely and you’ll lose the person you were before you signed on the dotted line. I would not change a moment of my service, I would not trade in one second for anything in this world. I just wish that someone would have told me what to expect that someone would have given me a heads up so that I could meet it all head on.
Every once in awhile in emergency services you get the chance to really make a difference, you get step up to the plate and you get the chance to save a life. Yesterday me and the crew got dropped for a witnessed cardiac arrest with CPR already in progress. Upon arrival ourselves and the EMS crew went through the resuscitation rounds, three shocks and three rounds of Epi. We did a load and go and I drove the unit into the ER while on the way to the ER we get the patient back and he starts breathing on his own, and ever better when we get him in the ER room he is trying to wake up and fighting the airways! It was definitely a shot in the arm for moral and has made my entire week, its the reason why I got into emergency services to help people.
**Update** I found out this week that my patient is alive and well after having quadruple bypass surgery and is expected to make a full recovery.
Every once in awhile in emergency services you get the chance to really make a difference, you get step up to the plate and you get the chance to save a life. Yesterday me and the crew got dropped for a witnessed cardiac arrest with CPR already in progress. Upon arrival ourselves and the EMS crew went through the resuscitation rounds, three shocks and three rounds of Epi. We did a load and go and I drove the unit into the ER while on the way to the ER we get the patient back and he starts breathing on his own, and ever better when we get him in the ER room he is trying to wake up and fighting the airways! It was definitely a shot in the arm for moral and has made my entire week, its the reason why I got into emergency services to help people.
A firefighter has died.
A small town morns the loss of a home town hero.
A Mother, Father, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Wife, or Husband grieves with a broken heart.
A station is in pieces
71 of my brothers have laid down their lives in the line of duty.
Across the country 71 times flags were lowered to half staff and covered coffins. 71 families answered a the door greeted by the somber faces of 71 Chiefs and chaplains who stood with hats in hand, tears swelling in their eyes as they told a loved one that their firefighter would never come home again.
Tonight there will be 71 empty spots around dinner tables. 71 people who will miss Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas this year. They will miss birthdays and anniversaries.
71 stations are trying to pick up the pieces, trying to learn how to move forward and process the guilt of being alive while a brother gave it all.
71 families have heard someone tell them that on behalf of their state and department and a grateful community to accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation of your loved ones honorable and faithful service and their sacrifice, as a folded flag is presented.
John Randle
Matthew LeTourneau
Russell Achord
Derrick Ryan Webb
Dwayne “Yogi” Thomas
Jason Dickey
Richard Jenks
Earnest McDuffie
Christopher Pryor
Casey Stephen Kuhns
Stacey Leigh Boulware
M.V. Hudson
Allen Headley
Rodney D Baker, Jr
Michael R Davidson
Ivan Flanscha
Zachary Anthony
Michael Edwards
Tom Craigo
Larry Marusik
Daryel Richards
Richard L Garner Jr
Timothy Wayne Royce
Caleb Scott
Bernard Olive
Richard L Sales
M. Kent Stillwagon
Gregory Jackson
Adam Taylor
Herbert “Butch” Tyler Wilcox
Anthony Colacino
Philip H. Neubich
Jeffrey Holt
Michael Godzak
Thelonious “Theo” Adams
Mark A Graziano
William F. Brinza III
Thomas Albert Cannon
Juan J. Bucio
Tony Spencer III
Grant L. Froman
Dakota Snavely
Richard “Andy” Loller, Jr
Douglas C. Ambrozewycz
William Moore IV
David Robert Rosa
Joe Patterson
Devon Coney
Benny Hutchins
Michael Goodnight
Cory Barr
Michael F. Cherubini
Braden Varney
Zachary J. Fazekas
Nathan Flynn
Brian Hughes
Jeremy Stoke
Don R. Smith
Pasquale “Pepper” DiBenedetto
Barry Everett
Andrew Brake
Madison “Maddy” Lee Clinton, Jr
Jeff Holden
Matthew Burchett
Michael Reese
Daniel “Danny” Lister
Eric Christopher Aarseth
David Fischer
Robert James Phillips II
Russell Hayes
Brad Clark
God speed.
You have performed your duties to the best of your ability, now take your rest. We have the line from here.
**Update 11/8/2018** Glenn Harman Joshua Eugin Tom Henrich Ken Hood Dustin Grubbs Dennis Straight 77 brothers have laid down their lives.
**Update 11/24/2018 Michael Lubig Daniel J. Lucius. 78 Brothers have laid down their lives.
**Update 12/24/2018** Michael Galay Christopher J. Roy John Ostegard Scott Dannheimer.
83 brothers have laid down their lives.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
A firefighter has died.
A small town morns the loss of a home town hero.
A Mother, Father, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Wife, or Husband grieves with a broken heart.
A station is in pieces
71 of my brothers have laid down their lives in the line of duty.
Across the country 71 times flags were lowered to half staff and covered coffins. 71 families answered a the door greeted by the somber faces of 71 Chiefs and chaplains who stood with hats in hand, tears swelling in their eyes as they told a loved one that their firefighter would never come home again.
Tonight there will be 71 empty spots around dinner tables. 71 people who will miss Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas this year. They will miss birthdays and anniversaries.
71 stations are trying to pick up the pieces, trying to learn how to move forward and process the guilt of being alive while a brother gave it all.
71 families have heard someone tell them that on behalf of their state and department and a grateful community to accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation of your loved ones honorable and faithful service and their sacrifice, as a folded flag is presented.
John Randle
Matthew LeTourneau
Russell Achord
Derrick Ryan Webb
Dwayne “Yogi” Thomas
Jason Dickey
Richard Jenks
Earnest McDuffie
Christopher Pryor
Casey Stephen Kuhns
Stacey Leigh Boulware
M.V. Hudson
Allen Headley
Rodney D Baker, Jr
Michael R Davidson
Ivan Flanscha
Zachary Anthony
Michael Edwards
Tom Craigo
Larry Marusik
Daryel Richards
Richard L Garner Jr
Timothy Wayne Royce
Caleb Scott
Bernard Olive
Richard L Sales
M. Kent Stillwagon
Gregory Jackson
Adam Taylor
Herbert “Butch” Tyler Wilcox
Anthony Colacino
Philip H. Neubich
Jeffrey Holt
Michael Godzak
Thelonious “Theo” Adams
Mark A Graziano
William F. Brinza III
Thomas Albert Cannon
Juan J. Bucio
Tony Spencer III
Grant L. Froman
Dakota Snavely
Richard “Andy” Loller, Jr
Douglas C. Ambrozewycz
William Moore IV
David Robert Rosa
Joe Patterson
Devon Coney
Benny Hutchins
Michael Goodnight
Cory Barr
Michael F. Cherubini
Braden Varney
Zachary J. Fazekas
Nathan Flynn
Brian Hughes
Jeremy Stoke
Don R. Smith
Pasquale “Pepper” DiBenedetto
Barry Everett
Andrew Brake
Madison “Maddy” Lee Clinton, Jr
Jeff Holden
Matthew Burchett
Michael Reese
Daniel “Danny” Lister
Eric Christopher Aarseth
David Fischer
Robert James Phillips II
Russell Hayes
Brad Clark
God speed.
You have performed your duties to the best of your ability, now take your rest. We have the line from here.
**Update 11/8/2018** Glenn Harman Joshua Eugin Tom Henrich Ken Hood Dustin Grubbs Dennis Straight 77 brothers have laid down their lives.
**Update 11/24/2018 Michael Lubig Daniel J. Lucius. 78 Brothers have laid down their lives.
Soviet Army crosses onto Germany and begins final march to Berlin. Early 1945 (Colourised)
I hate it. Bad post. Horrible. Have a terrible day
[A M A Z I N G]
(For more of these gorgeous Farmhouse go to this photographers link) #designcentralproject - #archi_ologie @archi_ologie
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Test
What, wait, you mean to tell me that 1st responders are human too? Can’t be, liberals say all they do is kill blacks and ignore minorities. We love and support our 1st responders.
😂😂😂
Mental healthcare needs to change.
@just-another-beautiful-mess beat me to it.
You don’t go shoot up people in a bar if you have good mental health. People need to know that help is out there, help needs to be easily available, they shouldn’t be gaslighted, and they need to know it’s okay to feel fucked up in their head.
I don’t think that the problem is as traditional people need to know that there is help available. I think it is more of a need for a culture shift in mental health, allowing mental health professionals, teachers, coworkers, etc be able to reach out about individuals more who exhibit behavioral issues and more to a point have their concerns taken more seriously by the AHJ and not simply brush away. In many cases, granted not all there have been plenty of text book warning signs for the majority of recent active assailants. However with that being said we are seeing a huge shift away from the “original” profiles and motivations of said assailants. Traditionally an active assailant fantasizes about the event over and over again playing out in their head far in advance of the actual event, in some ways like a repeated sexual fantasy which is why often times they take their own lives when they encounter any type of resistance, such as armed civilians, or law enforcement. The shift is starting to move towards sensationalism rather than fantasy, that is the scary part of the situation. Unfortunately we live in a society that is driven by bad news and sensationalism where violence and shooters are plastered across the news for days and days and days on end and it only continues to back feed into the problem in a horrible cycle.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
A firefighter has died.
A small town morns the loss of a home town hero.
A Mother, Father, Girlfriend, Boyfriend, Wife, or Husband grieves with a broken heart.
A station is in pieces
71 of my brothers have laid down their lives in the line of duty.
Across the country 71 times flags were lowered to half staff and covered coffins. 71 families answered a the door greeted by the somber faces of 71 Chiefs and chaplains who stood with hats in hand, tears swelling in their eyes as they told a loved one that their firefighter would never come home again.
Tonight there will be 71 empty spots around dinner tables. 71 people who will miss Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas this year. They will miss birthdays and anniversaries.
71 stations are trying to pick up the pieces, trying to learn how to move forward and process the guilt of being alive while a brother gave it all.
71 families have heard someone tell them that on behalf of their state and department and a grateful community to accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation of your loved ones honorable and faithful service and their sacrifice, as a folded flag is presented.
John Randle
Matthew LeTourneau
Russell Achord
Derrick Ryan Webb
Dwayne “Yogi” Thomas
Jason Dickey
Richard Jenks
Earnest McDuffie
Christopher Pryor
Casey Stephen Kuhns
Stacey Leigh Boulware
M.V. Hudson
Allen Headley
Rodney D Baker, Jr
Michael R Davidson
Ivan Flanscha
Zachary Anthony
Michael Edwards
Tom Craigo
Larry Marusik
Daryel Richards
Richard L Garner Jr
Timothy Wayne Royce
Caleb Scott
Bernard Olive
Richard L Sales
M. Kent Stillwagon
Gregory Jackson
Adam Taylor
Herbert “Butch” Tyler Wilcox
Anthony Colacino
Philip H. Neubich
Jeffrey Holt
Michael Godzak
Thelonious “Theo” Adams
Mark A Graziano
William F. Brinza III
Thomas Albert Cannon
Juan J. Bucio
Tony Spencer III
Grant L. Froman
Dakota Snavely
Richard “Andy” Loller, Jr
Douglas C. Ambrozewycz
William Moore IV
David Robert Rosa
Joe Patterson
Devon Coney
Benny Hutchins
Michael Goodnight
Cory Barr
Michael F. Cherubini
Braden Varney
Zachary J. Fazekas
Nathan Flynn
Brian Hughes
Jeremy Stoke
Don R. Smith
Pasquale “Pepper” DiBenedetto
Barry Everett
Andrew Brake
Madison “Maddy” Lee Clinton, Jr
Jeff Holden
Matthew Burchett
Michael Reese
Daniel “Danny” Lister
Eric Christopher Aarseth
David Fischer
Robert James Phillips II
Russell Hayes
Brad Clark
God speed.
You have performed your duties to the best of your ability, now take your rest. We have the line from here.
**Update 11/8/2018** Glenn Harman Joshua Eugin Tom Henrich Ken Hood Dustin Grubbs Dennis Straight 77 brothers have laid down their lives.
I’ve sat here for the longest time staring at this picture. Last night Assistant Chief Dennis Straight was struck and killed by a vehicle while working a motor vehicle accident in Lancaster County SC. This hits me particularly hard, Lancaster is one of my neighboring counties and is a very tight knit community, especially in emergency services. The South Carolina fire service itself is a very tight community with very few strangers. “Today could be the day” That is a quote I picked up somewhere along the way and its something I use a lot when I teach firefighters. We are on Facebook and Instagram and social media everyday and we see all these big events, multistory commercial fires, plant and industrial explosions, rescues of all shapes and sizes, maydays and rescues and everyday we say that only happens in the big cities or someplace else never here, not my hometown not in my department. The thing is we are always only one call away from what could be the worse day of our careers. Today could be the day that the rig is blindsided at the same intersection you travel through everyday, today might be the day that the fail safe at the local plant fails and you and your four man crew will be greeted at the guard shack with billowing black smoke as far as the eye can see. Last night unfortunately we were dealt with a horrible, heart breaking reminder that Today could be the day. Nobody expected to go out on a run and lose anyone let alone the Assistant Chief. His wife did not expect the knock at the door last night, she did not expect to lose the love of her life. There are a lot of broken hearts all throughout South Carolina tonight and a family, and a fire house that will never be the same. Across this country we now have lost 77 firefighters. Be careful out there, love your brothers and sisters and keep a watch over them, we are our brothers keeper. God Speed brother, you have performed your duty to the best of your abilities now take your rest, we have the watch from here. 5-5-5
